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[ ♪♪♪ ]
[ ♪ ]
Hey there, celebrity lovers!
Welcome to a very special edition of...
Celebrity Manhunt.
Tonight is the night we've been waiting for all year...
the Gemmie Awards!
That's when our fave TV stars get all dressed up
and take home the gold!
JOSH: In about half an hour, we'll take you
right onto the red carpet to meet the hottest stars.
I am SO pumped for this! Are you, Josh?
Oh yeah!
The tuxes!
The drama!
AHHHHH!
[ ♪ ]
♪ DEAR MOM AND DAD, I'M DOING FINE ♪
♪ YOU GUYS ARE ON MY MIND ♪
♪ YOU ASKED ME WHAT I WANTED TO BE ♪
♪ AND NOW I THINK THE ANSWER IS PLAIN TO SEE... ♪
♪ I WANNA BE FAMOUS ♪
♪ I WANNA LIVE CLOSE TO THE SUN ♪
♪ OH, PACK YOUR BAGS COZ I'VE ALREADY WON ♪
♪ EVERYTHING TO PROVE, NOTHING IN MY WAY ♪
♪ I'LL GET THERE ONE DAY ♪
♪ COZ I WANNA BE FAMOUS ♪
♪ NANANANA NANA NANA NA... ♪
♪ I WANNA BE... I WANNA BE ♪
♪ I WANNA BE FAMOUS ♪
♪ I WANNA BE... I WANNA BE ♪
♪ I WANNA BE FAMOUS ♪
[ ♪ ]
[ ♪ ]
Welcome back to Celebrity Manhunt!
We thought we'd pay tribute to this year's most famous reality show cast...
the teens who braved it all on the set of
TOTAL DRAMA ISLAND
and TOTAL DRAMA ACTION.
JOSH: We'll catch you up on Beth, Owen, Heather,
Trent, Duncan, Gwen, Lindsay, Katie and Sadie,
Cody, Noah, Justin, DJ, Courtney, Harold, Tyler,
Eva, Izzy, Leshawna, Geoff, Bridgette and Ezekiel.
BLAINELEY: They're nominated in the category of
'Best Reality Ensemble.'
I think they're gonna nail it, Blaineley.
No doubt.
And when they reunite on that crimson rug,
Celebrity Manhunt will drain every last drop of drama
from these uber-famous teens.
LOVE IT!
Total Drama may have ended, but the drama goes on!
And on!
Our crack team of undercover gossip reporters
have been super busy this year...
Hoser Boy got his party on!
Miss Moneybags was caught with her pants down in Paris!
Zut alors!
JOSH: Meanwhile, has Duncney gone rabid?
BLAINELEY: The Celebrity Manhunt cameras caught them all.
Even Gwen spotting Heather's three ounce weight gain.
Oooh! I can't wait to see these to kitties
bare their claws on the red carpet!
Rowr!
We've been measuring the popularity of this famous gang
using our amazing, awe-inspiring,
Celebrity Manhunt Drama Machine!
TECH: It's busted.
Let's start with Total Drama's newest BFFs.
Last season, Lindsay plucked Beth from the depths of geekdom
and became her gal pal.
They took off for Paris and painted the town red.
Literally!
Look, Mom! It's me and the Mona Lisa!
Oooh! You look soooo much cuter than her!
[ GIBBERISH FRENCH ] Fromage!
Oh no,no, Mr. Guard! I'll fix it!
Oops. Does anyone have any spare paint handy?
Okay. Personally?
I would have given Beth a pass for being a bit clumsy,
but LINDSAY?
That thing's a national treasure.
Wait. I can explain!
Can I PLEASE have my phrase book back?
Lindsay, help me out here!
Did anyone see my other earring?
It's a gold hoop with a little horse charm --
LINDSAY! They don't speak English!
Oh!
[shouting]: I LOST MY EARRING!
It's a HOOOOOP. With a HOOOORSE!
[NEIGHS!] HORSE?
BLAINELEY: Poor Beth!
Her parents have to sell their car
just to bail them out after months in the slammer.
Will Beth and Lindsay pull themselves together for the red carpet?
Lindsay will totally bring it.
She is a style superdiva on and off the red carpet.
Yeah, you're right.
After one look at Lindsay in some designer dress,
we'll all forget about the jail thing.
Next up: Post Drama Bods!
This year we saw major improvement
and fitness fiascoes.
[ BEAT BOXING POORLY ]
[ BURP ]
So I had a few burritos!
Killer beat-boxing requires an expanded diaphragm.
Like an opera singer.
Check it!
[ BEAT BOXING ]
[ FALSETTO OPERATIC NOTE ]
Harold let himself go, but Eva pumped herself UP.
Waaaay up.
UNNNNNNNNNNGGH!
Someone's gonna blow a sweat valve!
JOSH: Deodorant anyone?
Speaking of... one husky Total Drama dude
worked up a real bod-stank in the nether-regions of cable TV.
WOOHOOHOOO!
That feels AWESOME!
And if you want SWEET abs like mine?
Check out the BellyBuster 5000!
Just go HARD for eight hours a day,
and turn your flabby gut into an AWESOME steel washboard.
Grab the power handles,
sit on the power spring,
and GO!
HAHA... WHOA! WHOA!
[ FART ]
Nice one, Owen!
And DJ also took to the airwaves.
Hey there and welcome back to "Momma's Heapin' Helpins"
where we don't count calories...
OW! We count smiles.
OW!
JOSH: Chock full of carbs, cholesterol and calories,
their food was to die for.
Only problem was, people did.
DJ, what were you thinking?
We tracked Momma down to answer a few questions.
There she is.
Momma, what do you have to say for yourself?
Get outta my face!
After a few dozen lawsuits, DJ and his Momma
were left with nothing but a Tour Bus full of
shattered hopes and dreams.
BLAINELEY: While DJ and his Momma aired their dirty laundry,
we went looking for more.
But when it comes to one Total Drama teen?
There was no dirty laundry.
Or any sign of him.
Noah, where are you?
JOSH: This pathetic telephoto shot is all we got,
but don't worry, folks.
We'll hunt him down on the carpet tonight.
Meanwhile, our cameras were hot on the trail
of another Total Drama man of mystery.
Our homeschooled hoser turned Homie, Ezekiel,
went back to the farm for some down time.
Celebrity Manhunt caught up with him.
Yo yo yo, paparazzi peeps.
Yo, wanna piece o' the Zekes?
S'up?
JOSH: It don't matter how much bling you sling, brother,
you gotta EARN ghetto cred.
Uh... I'm kinda stuck here.
Can you put the cameras down and help me out?
Guys?
Good work, people!
Next up Gwen and Heather.
Their epic hate-on hit the Internet
where they had a full-on blog war.
Can someone tell me just HOW Heather got her celeb status?
That girl gives dirt a bad name.
If there's a fight between Heather and Gwen,
I'm on Team Gwen all the way.
Me too!
Grumpy Gwen doesn't wear the teen uniform.
She's weird and awesome and the total anti-Heather.
Let's check out some of that web action from earlier this year.
Hey. Today I want to talk about Going Green.
Basically, the world is going to die
if we don't do something about it --
Katie, remember when we 'went green'?
Guys...
Oh my gosh, Sadie!
When you helped paint my bedroom green?
And we got into that paint fight?
I know!
And just because we got into one little paint fight
doesn't mean we're not BFFs!
Guys! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!
I know! And look. I'm still, 'green!'
Argh! You were supposed to wait for the signal before talking.
Sorry, Gwen.
It's just that your show is kinda...
Bad.
Oh, why did Leshawna bail on me?
Then came Heather's online attack!
AS GWEN: This is the loser Gwen show
where everything always sucks,
and the world is terrible.
AS KATIE: Like, oh my GOSH! No singing?
That is so sad! Don't you think, Sadie?
AS SADIE: I KNOW! It's totally, like: Oh my gosh!
Totally!
Isn't it, like, awesome how the same we are?
Now look at my butt.
AS GWEN: How dare you interrupt my loser video blog!?
I wish Duncan were here so I could kiss him
even though I'm way too scared to tell him how much I looove him
because I'm too cool!
MWAH! P.S.: Save the whales.
JOSH: So cold!
Brrrr! Gwen couldn't let this go.
She had to retaliate, which is too bad.
She's so much better than that.
Did you know that Heather couldn't get a date for her semi-formal?
That's right, the most famous girl at White Pines High
was turned down by every guy in school.
And what did she do?
Crash the party in a blaze of defiance?
Stage her own protest semi-formal?
Nope.
Heather stayed at home and made out with her cat, Bruiser.
Her little cousin sent me this footage.
[ PURRING ]
Do you KNOW where Bruiser's tongue has been, Heather?
Ewwwww!
After a few more weeks of this,
we invited them to the Celebrity Manhunt Studio.
You've been through so much together...
Sharing a cabin at a summer camp,
a trailer at an abandoned studio.
Why not bury the hatchet?
Isn't your friendship more important than this blog-war?
It's just that...
you see, Josh, Gwen is a gigantic loser.
And Heather's breath reeks like cat butt.
GAAAAAAAA!
HEATHER: I'm gonna take you down!
Catfight! Catfight!
What is it with guys and catfights?
Let's watch it again! ROWR!
A major celebrity's arriving at the red carpet!
Gah! Oof!
Dude, where'd you learn to drive?!
NASCAR?!
Ah, suck it up, you big baby.
Fine. You clean up the barf.
BLAINELEY: It's stubble-boy, Chris McLean!
Hey-y-y-y-y! Celebrity Manhunt!
Josh!
Say, did you get my video?
JOSH: Yep.
Chris, you must be dying to see the Total Drama cast again!
Who?
The teenagers you abused for two seasons on national television?
Oh. Right. Love their work.
Love them.
Can we talk about my new show now?
We're going to take a break,
but don't go away.
Next, we have the rags to riches to rags story
of the Drama Brothers,
the Total Drama band that rocketed up and down the charts
with their hit "When I Cry."
Here's a clip from last year's chart-topping music video!
[ BEAT-BOXING ]
When I cried, my eyes wet
I swear it wasn't guy sweat
Throwing to commercial? I got this.
Will Heather and Gwen's claws come out?
Will Beth take Lindsay's advice and get a makeover?
Will DJ take his Momma to the Gemmies?
So many questions!
Find out the answers when Celebrity Manhunt's
Total Drama Red Carpet Reunion Special returns,
right after this!
That's how you do it.
Mmm. Thanks.
[ ♪ ]
It's Celebrity Manhunt's Total Drama Red Carpet Reunion Special!
Now, let's look at what happens when the lovin' stops
on Total!
Drama!
Breakups!
It all started out so well, with matching tats.
Duncney was the Total Drama Power couple
that defied the odds and took a chance on love.
But it didn't take long before Courtney's
"my way or the highway" attitude
started to get on Duncan's last nerve.
BLAINELEY: Celebrity Manhunt got these juicy shots
at a restaurant back in the summer.
JOSH: And then it was splits-ville.
I have nothing to say about that guy.
Except that he's a complete THUG.
And I wish I'd never met him!
Ahem. No comment.
And he has the table manners of a chimp!
No comment.
he always chews with his mouth open.
And he's constantly interrupting me.
And -- I SAID, No comment!
Courtney's still suing Duncan for custody of their raccoon, Britney.
Come on, Duncan,
suck it up and take her back!
Courtney, grow a heart! We know you can, honey!
While Courtney's team of lawyers prepared to wallop Duncan,
did Gwen look just a little tempted?
Okay, I'm STILL getting a lot of emails about Duncan...
"Do you like him?" "He's perfect for you."
"Courtney doesn't deserve him, you do."
Enough already!
He HAS a girlfriend. Case closed.
Then she heard about the big Duncney breakup!
Courtney is totally nuts letting Duncan get away like that.
He is the best thing that ever happened to her.
I mean, look at the guy, he's HOT!
I mean, uh, he's okay... for her.
Sounds like we might be in for
a little red carpet love-triangle action!
Now, let's check in with another star couple.
Bridgette and Geoff,
the co-hosts of the Total Drama Aftermath Show.
You just couldn't open a fanzine this year
without seeing a picture of Geoff and Bridgette --
or as we call them: Gigette...
Sucking face.
With Geoff's popularity shooting higher than Bridgette's,
she had to put up with a lot of Geoff's stalkers.
JOSH: When Geoff let his guard down, he was in for a SMACKdown.
But luckily for Gigette, they patched it all up.
Let's all just chill out.
I never should have let my eyes wander from my schmoopy-schmoo.
And I should always trust my cutie patootie.
Cutie Patootie?!
Schmoopy-schmoo?!
Ewwwwwww!
There's no bigger buzz kill
than baby talk when it comes to celebs.
Are you kidding me? They are still fascinating!
They ate salads! They tried on socks!
They ironed!
I'm excited!
Did you SEE the Aftermath Show?
Gigette are total amateurs!
And... ironing?
You have to earn gossip-worthiness!
Otherwise, I'm-a change the channel.
Let's get back to some real celebrities.
The Drama Brothers!
JOSH: The Total Drama boy band ruled the pop music world.
Yeah, we're selling out.
Stadiums, I mean!
Girls even steal our used hotel bedsheets!
It's all about touching people on an emotional level.
D'you know what I mean?
[ PLAYING OFF-KEY ]
I don't even play an instrument.
But the crazy groupie chicks don't mind!
[ SIGH ]
I am soooo crushing on Justin!
He had enough flava for the whole band!
Just as their album shot to the top of the charts,
the trappings of fame shot straight to their heads.
The party was over, but was their music career?
When they weren't doing community service,
the Drama Brothers were in studio,
recording a new album.
Celebrity Manhunt caught up with them between sets.
[ PLAYING OFF-KEY ]
People blamed the birthday party.
But that's rock 'n' roll, man.
Uh, the problem was the music.
You mean the beat-boxing.
H-Bomb! You know I love your stylez,
but this is about giving the fans what they want.
You mean the fans who keep begging me to make a solo album?
See? You just can't bring up the beat-boxing around him.
What do you think, Justin?
Huh? Sorry, I'm just breaking up with someone.
[ GIRL WAILING ]
Oh! Do me a solid and send that to my girl too?
[ BEAT BOXING ]
Fresh.
Listen I want to take this opportunity,
also to give you an exclusive,
and just talk a bit about what's happening.
That was my last performance as a Flavour Boy.
I'm gonna go solo.
Check it..
What does "LO SO" mean?
"Solo". Are you serious?
Yeah. I'm dead serious.
[ HEARTY LAUGH ]
I'm just done.
I've been through that. I've done it.
It seems like it's Harold's time now.
[LAUGH]
Why are you laughing at me?
JOSH: When Harold and the Drama Brothers
released their new albums on the same day,
Celebrity Manhunt was there.
Can I get a discount on this CD?
I need the case for something else.
And that was the end of the Drama Brothers.
Izzy turned out to be an awesomely talented actor
on the set of Total Drama Action.
Post elimination,
she signed a stack of movie deals.
Her career sky-rocketed until she lost it on set
and scared the lunch out of her crew.
And Celebrity Manhunt was there to cover the whole thing.
Or I'll KICK YOUR [BLEEPED] BUTT!
Sorry.
HAHA, DON'T BE "SORRY", THINK FOR A SECOND!
NO NO NO!
I WILL NOT TAKE [BLEEPED] MINUTES,
I'M READY TO GO NOW!
YOU CALL YOURSELF A DIRECTOR OF PHOTOGRAPHY?!
WHY WERE YOU WALKING THROUGH THE SET?!
WHY. WERE. YOU. WALKING. RIGHT. THROUGH.
THE [BLEEPED] SET?!
Ha, ha, okay, just kidding, guys.
I just went ballistic for no reason.
What?
Oooh! Not a brilliant career move there, Izzy.
That DP was in trauma counselling for months.
Post Total Drama,
Tyler and Leshawna hit the celebrity reality TV circuit.
You've seen them on shows like...
Celebrity Stunt Driving,
Doctor for a Day,
So You Think You Can Eat That?
and Extreme Chess, Pillar Edition.
We caught up with these 'Realebrities'
on the set of Sharp Things Flying At Your Head.
My awesome athletic abilities went to waste on Total Drama.
Whoa!
But on these other shows,
I can really use my natural physical talents.
Leshawna too.
OW!
Talents, shmalents!
I'm doing this for the cash mon-nay!
Yes!
Okay, worst career moves, Go!
I'm gonna say...
Leshawna's Largest Loser Weight loss show appearance.
Girl, why would you want to trim down that perfect boot-ay?
My vote goes to Tyler for putting on that fake baby bump.
Dude, that was a desperate fame grab!
Some people will do ANYTHING for fame!
But it seems like others will do anything to avoid it.
GIRL: Eva, can you sign my field hockey stick?
Eva! Can you, huh?
Can you? Can you? Can you!
SHUT UP!
Now get lost before I have to bust some chops!
What are YOU looking at?
But if there's one rule we've discovered at Celebrity Manhunt,
it's the bigger the freakout, the greater the fame.
Soon, a bunch of competing websites sprang up
with the wildest, most insane Eva freakout photos.
We tracked down one webmaster for this live interview.
She asked that her identity not be revealed
to protect her from angry Eva.
So you know everything about everybody from the cast?
D'uh!
I'm the one who leaked the story about Noah's false teeth.
BLAINELEY: Would you call yourself a gossip-crazed Eva fan?
It's not just Eva.
I have websites for everyone from Total Drama.
Wow!
I'm in the presence of gossip royalty!
That's why it's so important to keep my identity a total secret.
There you are, sillybeans!
So much for my anonymity.
You saw the doctor? I'm so happy it's cleared up!
Anyways, Sierra,
Lindsay told me she has four ingrown toenails.
Hold on!
All along, Izzy, you've been feeding Sierra the dirt
on your Total Drama cast-mates?
Of course not! You're crazy!
[ LAUGHS ]
Okay. Yes.
I needed to pay off the RCMP creeps who were on my tail.
Those guys aren't cheap.
Ooh! Your friends are NOT going to be happy about that
on the red carpet!
Speaking of which, Izzy, shouldn't you be on your way to the Gemmie awards?
I am!
See ya!
The limos are coming! Ohmigosh! Ohmigosh! Ohmigosh!
LIMOS!
BLAINELEY: Who's up for a celebrity grudge-fest?!
Join Josh, me and hardcore fan Sierra
Really?
I get to be Celebrity Manhunt's red carpet interview diva?!
That's SO cool!
TAXI!
Wait, where's Izzy?
[ MANIACAL LAUGH ]
O-kay! Here I am on the red carpet.
It's so... RED!
Wow. Why are they red anyway.
Shouldn't they be black or something?
Or purple that would be really great!
Thanks, Izzy! We'll be right back --
Hopefully with some catfights --
after these messages!
[ ♪ ]
Welcome back to Celebrity Manhunt's
Total Drama Red Carpet Reunion Special!
This is it, people! Months of Total Drama cast infighting,
backstabbing and breakups are about to pay off,
right here, as our reality stars strut their stuff
on the Gemmie Awards red carpet!
Thanks JOSH! Sierra here.
I've got the carpet totally covered!
OMG! It's beat-boxer Harold, AKA H-bom!
FAN: You suck!
SIERRA: Ooooh!
Looks like we have some H-Bomb fans in the audience today!
With the release of his juicy tell-all book about the Flavour Boys,
expect fireworks when former his bandmates show up.
SIERRA: And here's Reality's most famous BFFs
Katie and Sadie!
Ladies!
Celebrity Manhunt? OHMIGOSH!
Hi Blaineley!
We love you!!
Lookin' smokin' hot in green!
Why don't you tell our ten million viewers about your outfits.
Ten million?
They all want to know!
It's a pretty simple question!
Uhhhhh... I dunno?
Ten million?
[ TIRES SCREECHING ]
I told you we'd be late, DJ!
DJ! How does it feel to have had it all, then lose it?
Oh.
Ahem. We're here for the gossip!
Okay, DJ. Level with me.
Secretly, who can't you stand from Total Drama?
Like who do you just hate? OW!
What's wrong with you, girl?
Do you think I raised my son to talk smack behind people's backs?
Ugh! Is that Drama Machine working yet?
[ BURP ]
The Duncney has arrived, fresh from their breakup!
Dinner is served!
Duncan!
Courtney!
Yeah, hi.
First a messy breakup, then the custody battle over Brittany.
You two must HATE each other!
BOTH: My lawyer says "no comment."
You got a lawyer? For real?
Uhhhh-ohhh...
Oh, I think I see Lindsay!
Here comes our fashion goddess now!
Hi!
Lindsay, you're not even dressed up!
What happened?!
I didn't want to get my Christian Lavoison outfit
wrinkled at the dress rehearsal.
But this isn't the rehearsal...
it's the Gemmie awards!
This is awkward.
I got these new earrings! Heh heh.
Remind me never to use HER as a fashion consultant.
Wait a minute,
the rest of the Total Drama gang are arriving on the red carpet!
I call dibs on the front row seat!
Oh no, you DON'T!
Did someone say 'ribs'?
Front row is where I go!
[ CRASHING AND MAYHEM ]
Yo, yo, yo!
Tyler!
[LAUGHING!]
Sierra, another limo has just pulled up!
Lactose-free, nonfat, half-caf, cocoa sprinkles --
It's the man of mystery himself, Noah!
And a gluten-free muffin, yep...
But... [ SIGH! ]
Looks like Noah landed himself a super important job
in the "industry".
Nothing says power like a phone and a latte.
Sierra, you know what would be better than nothing?
SOMETHING!
Guys, I have the Drama Brothers!
[SIGH] Let me guess...
they've reunited, and are re-releasing their last hit single?
Yeah. Pretty much.
How did you know?
The Gemmies are about to start,
and I'm gonna follow them inside!
Famous people only.
For real?
And as of about five seconds ago,
that excludes you.
Who died and made you doorman?
I did!
You died!?
Noah. Coffee. Is that my muffin?
You're Chris' assistant?
[LAUGHS!]
You kiss Chris' butt? For money?
Cut me some slack.
Everyone has to work their way up in this biz.
Bros!
Come on in, mah peeps!
How are they famous?
They're the stars of my new reality show...
Total Drama Dirtbags.
Huh?!
A bunch of nasty jerks live in a huge mansion
and get all bored and backstabby.
I'm nasty! That should be me!
These guys are up-and-coming.
Not down-and-going, i.e., you losers.
Excuse me!
Huh?
CODY?!
Alejandro, buddy! How's my next big star?
Ugh!
This latte's cold! You're fired!
Well, guys? I'd say 'later',
but, uh, there isn't gonna be a later.
So...
[ CRICKETS ]
Aw now what'd you go do that for, man?
Hey guys, we have to find a way inside.
Leave that to me!
[ ♪♪ SUSPENSEFUL ]
[ ♪ ]
[ CHEERS ]
Izzy! The door!
[ DISAPPOINTED SIGHS ]
Izzy, can you do that again?
Do what?
[ ♪ ]
If we win 'Best Reality Ensemble'
we'll be famous again, right?
MAN: Playing a talking car was a real challenge,
thank you.
He was AWESOME in that show!
"Please fasten your seat belt."
WOW! I'm getting goosebumps all over again!
ALEJANDRO: Next up: Best Reality Ensemble.
This is it!
And the winner is...
envelope please...
[ WORRIED GASPS ]
How hard is it to open an envelope?
Golden Oldies In Their Undies!
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
Awwwww! That's so cute!
That means we lost.
Oh. SO not cute.
Who cares about that stupid award?!
I'm going to LAW SCHOOL.
I have a FUTURE!
I miss that girl.
'Oldies in their Undies' was the only reality show
me and Tyler WEREN'T nominated for!
CODY: Uh, Guys?
MAN: And the Gemmie for Best Reality Show Host goes to...
once again Chris McLean!
[ THEY CAN'T BELIEVE IT ]
CHRIS: Thanks. Again.
But I couldn't have done it without an great bunch of people
from Total Drama Action.
Awwww!
CHRIS: The interns, the caterers,
the camera crew,
and the real stars of the show...
my stylists!
What about your long suffering assistant?
Schmuck.
Didn't know you had it in you, stringbean.
Tomorrow, I'll introduce the cast of my new reality series...
Total Drama Dirtbags!
On the Orpah show.
Dudes, you heard the guy. We're nobodies again.
At least I'll be able to survive on the streets.
Me too, y'all, jiggy.
And I'll go back to being just another pretty face.
And abs.
And butt.
What?!
I can't go back to my old life!
If I'm not famous, I'm not popular!
So... coooold.
C'mon, Momma. Let's go.
What's the matter with you?
NO ONE deserves to be more famous than you guys.
You can't just give up!
Do you have any idea how many millions of fans
there are out there?
I've been watching, blogging, PVRing you
since the first episode!
I -- I mean, WE have fan sites about each and every one of you.
We know everything about you.
We are rooting for you!
We know your eating habits.
Your hopes, your fears,
your DENTAL RECORDS!
Stalker.
You can't let us down now!
Whatya say?
What are we supposed to do?
I say beat those Dirtbags to Orpah's studio,
hijack the interview, and voila!
You're all famous again!
But she's in New York.
How are we supposed to get there by tomorrow afternoon?
I think I know of a way,
but it's not going to be easy!
Yeah... this should be interesting.
Okay, Cody, I need you to get assorted lengths of lumber.
Uh.. right now?
Owen, can you track down a medium-sized boat motor?
No problem. I'm on it!
Noah, I'm counting on you for three gallons of diesel fuel.
Sure thing, I'll get my unicorn to deliver it.
Perfect.
The real trick is going to be getting access to a car manufacturing plant.
Okay, we can do it, guys! WE CAN DO IT!
Guys, so are you gonna get on the bus or not?
YAAAAAAAAAAYYYY!
Wipe your feet first.
[ GROAN ]
You're gonna be famous again!
Let's go!
Right after this.
[ GROANS ]
[ ♪ ]
Breaking gossip news, everyone!
This is Total Drama Comeback!
CHRIS: They have one dream...
to claw their way back to fame
no matter what it takes...
cheating, shameless self promotion,
sabotage.
I love those kids.
You said they were washed up!
That was BEFORE they set off
on an unforgettable comeback adventure!
We have a feed from inside DJ's bus!
I TOLD you these people were gossip-worthy!
[ SNORING ]
Doesn't this jalopy go any faster?
Um, maybe you should let Duncan drive.
Not helping, Gwen!
She's just sticking up for her boyfriend.
Wait! Duncan's YOUR boyfriend!
My mistake.
Oh no. I think I'm gonna be...
bus sick.
Don't you get sick all over my new upholstery, now.
You are somethin' else, Mrs. M.
Put a coaster under that, girl!
[ SNIFFS ] What is THAT?
Whasiwha?
Nothing?
What are you doin' with all those Caramel Chewies on my bus?
My food's not good enough?!
I always have a stash handy for after my workouts.
Hey guys, there's the Dirtbag bus up ahead!
We've got to find a way to slow them down!
And then what?
I learned some battle tactics at Pirate Camp.
You got GAME, H-Bomb!
Now, if we just had some kind of catapult...
Like, a bra!
Wow. Genius.
Got any better ideas?
LESHAWNA: Here's a bra!
What? You never seen a big bra before?
Tyler, ammo!
I'm all over it! YEAH!
Don't even THINK about getting chocolate
on my nice clean floor!
Hahaha, I can't hold it much longer!
Aye, Matey! Fire in the hole!
CHRIS: Whhoa-oh-oh!
It looks like our Total Drama heroes
are launching caramel flavoured cannonballs!
Chris, in your entire career,
have you ever seen anything so underhanded?
Nothing as depraved as this, Blaineley.
Nothing as depraved as this.
Eat chocolate!
Whoooohooo!
Fire!
Ugh, you're gonna regret this!
Ha! You messed with the wrong reality show cast, Mister!
[ GROWL ]
Hurry it up! Back off.
It won't go any faster than this!
What we need is a man behind the wheel.
What YOU need is some tape over your mouth!
Well, if you just listen to me...
I'll start listening the minute you say something worthwhile!
You're insane, you know that?
And YOU are a MONSTER!
The Dirtbags are way behind us!
[ CHEERS ]
Why is the road so bumpy all of a sudden?
CHRIS: Where did Courtney learn to drive?
Uh-oh!
COURTNEY! LOOK OUT! CLIFF!
[ GASP ]
AHHHH! I can't steer!
MOMMA: What'd I tell you about crashing my bus!?
Hit the brakes!!
What do you think I'm doing?
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Total Drama Inc. waives all legal responsibility
for the sudden and gruesome demise of our cast.
Told you those would come in handy.
DJ: We're all gonna DIE!
So Noah was Chris' assistant, huh.
[ SCREAMS ]
Now I have motion sickness.
Oh, no you don't!
I hope Leshawna doesn't need her bra back.
Whooooaaaaaa!
Yaaaaay!
Being weightless is AWESOME!
I feel like this all the time!
What's that?
I-I couldn't hold it down!
WHOOAAAAAAA!
Cut the bra! Cut the bra!
I'm alive!
AWESOME!
Hmm. Wouldja look at that? They're not dead.
Yeah, but they're probably all banged up.
Y'know, the kind you never really heal from?
Maybe I should call for help.
[ THEY BURST OUT LAUGHING ]
GEOFF: I came here to party.
But this? Seriously lacks partatiousness.
So I'm going to get help.
Then, we're all going to PARTY! Woo hoo!
I'll come with you, Geoff!
Me too!
Great. Anybody else?
Bridgette? Babe?
Gonna catch some rays, 'kay, sweetie?
Who am I to come between a hottie and her rays?
All right, let's go!
[ YAWN ]
Did Geoff get back yet?
Oh, I hope he's found help.
GEOFF: Help! Help! Help!
Help, Dudes!
Ugh, why didn't you dummies open the door?
Uh, dude, those ARE dummies!
Oh, right, haha. Wait a minute..
Isolated location, dummies,
nuclear testing signs...
flesh eating mutants?
Hi.
Dudes, WE GOTTA GET OUTTA HERE!
[ SCREAMS ]
[ SNORING ]
That smells AWESOME!
You thought I was gonna let all you guys go hungry?
What is it? Please say back bacon.
Fried rocks, with tumbleweed.
You don't like it?
Ah no! It's awesome!
SIERRA: It's Chris!
They don't call me Best Reality Shown Host for nothing!
[ CHEERS! ]
EW!
Pancakes! WHOOOO!
I have an announcement.
Now, we all know that nobody does drama like you guys.
Duh! But what happened to Total Drama Dirtbags?
It was a trick!
There never was any Total Drama Dirtbags.
Is that true?
Well... mostly.
I did come up with the name.
But, anyhoo,
I needed to find out if you kids still had it.
What about Alejandro?
A dupe, just like the rest of you.
I needed someone on the inside.
But to make it up,
I told him he can join you guys next time.
What 'next time'?
A no-holds-barred race around the world.
In a jet!
After all the crap you put us through?
As if!
Don't you want to be famous again?
Pass.
What about CASH.
The chance to win, oh, One Million Dollars!?
it!
Whoop! Whoop! Celebrity Manhunt exclusive alert!
Another season of Total Drama is coming,
and I for one can't wait!
Well, Drama Machine, what do you think of that?
[ LAUGHING ]
We gotta rescue the gang!
Then we gotta party!
Too late, big guy.
[ CHEERING ]
Hey, what's Chris doing with everybody on TV?
And bags of money?
Looks like you missed the boat.
Chris just cast your buds on the next season of Total Drama!
And one of them will walk away with one million dollars!!
No. NO!
NOOOOO!
What?! No way!
I'm gonna LOSE IT!
Agreed.
Thanks for watching Celebrity Manhunt's
Total Drama Reunion Special!
Looks like I'm back in for another season.
And I'll be keeping a much closer eye on Gwen.
So not trusting that boyfriend stealer.
(gasp)
Get your hands off of me!
I thought that we can form an alliance.
Check it.
(beat box)
Wha-wha.
(beat box) Leshawna
OMG-- This is my first confessional EVER.
I am so excited!
I never thought that I would be on
Total Drama.
My favorite show in the world!
Talking to all my favorite TV stars is so fad.
Now I will finally put to rest all those Cody blog questions.
Like, how many freckles does he have on his back?
What kind of deodorant does he use?
How many times does Cody sleep facing west?
And--
What song does he sing in the shower?
(giggles) Oh...
(giggles) Oh my...
That last question will definitely be a six month
analysis.
Oh yeah. Ha ha ha
Ho, ho, homies.
♪ Get in focus, and take notice ♪
I'm what is, oh yeah, that's biz ♪
Uh, huh, uh, uh, uh-- Uh, huh.
(thump)
I miss you already Jeff.
Wait for me, Schmoopy Boo.
I'm gonna win it for both of us.
(crying)
You know what they say...
Third time luck. This could be my season!
Hey-- I'm game.
Bring it, Chris.
What out, Total Drama nerds.
The new guy is going all the way to the top.
Don't you worry, mama.
I'm gonna win this one
and buy you a big 'ol house.
And, maybe a new bus.
(chomping)
Pancakes!
I can't wait to find out where we're going first!
23% of my bloggers say, we're going to India.
And 10% say that Chris has lied to us.
And that he's actually going to film us in an old bomb shelter.
Ha-- Phhft, as if.
I'm a third generation Crimes McClain Scholar, okay.
I could tell if he was lying to us
by his vocal pitch!
And body language
Only someone who has an extensive knowledge
of Total Drama could catch that.
BTW--
Did you know that Chris wears 31 by 32 pants?
And only buys them at Strudy's Pants and Jewelers.
He also has 3 dogs named, Banjo, Todd, and --
Sixteen teens,
a trip around the world
and a million dollars.
What more could you possibly want?
How about music?
Yeah...
everybody's doing the musical thing now.
Sure!
And MUSIC!
See you next time on
TOTAL...
DRAMA...
Both: ♪ Musical ♪
♪ Musical ♪
♪ Mu...
si...
cal... ♪♪
(crash)
Uh-- Maybe not.