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[ TICKING ]
>> IT'S TIME.
♪ ♪
>> IT'S TIME.
>> YOU ARE WATCHING IT.
IT IS MARRIAGE VOWS.
WHEN IS DIVORCE ACCEPTABLE?
Dr. DAVID ANDERSON IS WITH US
P OFY AND WE'RE GOING TO BE
HIS HEAD AND WE ALL SAY THINGS
SOMETIMES WE WISH WE HAD NOT
SAID.
BUT MY FIRST RESPONSE WOULD HAVE
BEEN BE BITTER AT GOD STATEMENT.
THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN THE ISSUE
TO ME AS A COUNSELOR.
WE DON'T HAVE A RIGHT TO BE
BITTER AT GOD FOR ANYTHING AND
THIS MAN AND HIS MARRIAGE, IT IS
SKUD -- SKEWED BECAUSE OF THE
BITTERNESS AT GOD.
SO THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN AN ISSUE
FOR ME AND AFTER THE BITTERNESS
IS RESOLVED, THE MARRIAGE
WOULDN'T HAVE BEEN A QUESTION
AND THAT IS THE PROBLEM WITH
DIVORCE.
WE OFTEN SEE DIVORCE AS THE
TARGET POINT OF OUR DEBATE BUT
IT RADIATES OUT INTO BIGGER AND
BIGGER ISSUES OF THE PLAN OF GOD
FOR OUR LIVES.
AND IF WE BELIEVE THAT GOD WANTS
US HAPPY, IF THAT IS OUR BELIEF
SYSTEM, THAT GOD WANTS ME HAPPY,
WE CAN RATIONALIZE A WHOLE BUNCH
OF DECISIONS THAT HAVE NEGATIVE
IMPACT ON OTHERS.
BUT IF WE SAY GOT WANTS ME
FAITHFUL FIRST, THEN I VIEW MY
HAPPINESS IN TERMS OF AM I BEING
FAITHFUL AND IF NOT, I HAVE NO
RIGHT TO HAPPINESS.
BECAUSE GOD'S EXPECTATION IS FOR
ME TO BE OH BEAT KWREPBT --
OBEDIENT TO HIM AND HAPPINESS IS
A BY-PRODUCT BUT IT IS AM I
PLEASING GOD BY BEING FAITHFUL.
>> WHAT YEAR WERE YOU MARRIED?
>> WELL, MY ANNIVERSARY IS
COMING UP IN JUST A FEW WEEKS.
I WAS 2 YEARS OLD WHEN YOU GOT
MARRIED, BORN IN '57.
>> BUT ISN'T THIS AMAZING, AND I
CAN ATTEST TO THIS, IS THAT YOU
HAVE FOUND YOURSELF MARRIED AND
IN SITUATIONS WHERE IF YOU
WEREN'T COMMITTED, YOU WOULD
HAVE WALKED, RIGHT?
>> RIGHT, AND NOT JUST ME OR
YOU, IT IS THE WAY GOD INTENDED
IT --
>> REALLY?
>> BECAUSE MARRIAGE IS NOT ABOUT
LOVE, IT IS ABOUT COMMITMENT.
>> GIMME THAT AGAIN.
>> MARRIAGE IS NOT ABOUT LOVE.
AND THE BIBLE NEVER SAYS MARRY
THE ONE YOU LOVE, IT SAYS TO
LOVE THE ONE YOU MARRIED.
SO MARRIAGE IS NOT ABOUT LOVE,
IT IS A CHOICE YOU MADE, A
COVENANT.
YOU ARE COMMANDED TO GOD TO LOVE
ONCE YOU ARE MARRIED BUT IT IS
NOT THE REASON FOR MARRIAGE.
IT IS ONE OF THE ASPECTS OF THE
INGREDIENT OF MARRIAGE.
THE FOUNDATION IS THE CHARACTER
DECISION OF COMMITMENT AND THE
BIBLE DOESN'T EVEN TELL US HOW
TO CHOOSE YOUR SPOUSE BECAUSE
EVERY CULTURE DOES IT DIFFERENT.
IN THE BIBLE DAYS, THE PARENTS
CHOSE THE SPOUSE.
SO THERE WAS NO SENSE OF LOVE,
IT WAS USUALLY FINANCIAL MEANS,
FAMILY CONNECTIONS, VILLAGE
CONNECTIONS, THERE WAS REASONS
FOR IT, BUT THAT DIDN'T NEGATE
STAYING MARRIED BECAUSE THE
REASON WASN'T GOOD.
AND IN OUR CULTURE, WE HAVE
BECOME SO PREOCCUPIED WITH
FALLING IN LOVE AND MARRYING THE
ONE THAT WE LOVE THAT OUR
MARRIAGE IS SITTING ON A
FOUNDATION OF JELLO.
BECAUSE SCENES OF LOVE AND
EROTICISM, THEY DO THIS
CONSTANTLY AND IF THAT IS OUR
FOUND DAYS, IT -- FOUNDATION, S
DOOMED FROM THE START.
BUT IF YOU TAKE IT THAT NOW I AM
READY TO TAKE A COMPANION THE
REST OF MY LIFE AND WILLING TO
LOVING THIS COMPANION EVEN WHEN
THEY ARE UNLOVEABLE, THEN I AM
COMMITTED TO MARRIAGE.
>> THE SPOT WE SAW WITH PAT
GIVING THAT ADVICE, WHERE DOES
IN SICKNESS AND IN HEALTH COME
IN?
I MEAN WHEN, DOES SICKNESS
NEGATE MY COMMITMENT?
>> WELL, REMEMBER, FIRST OF ALL,
THAT VOW IS NOT IN SCRIPTURE.
OUR MARRIAGE VOWS ARE NOT
SCRIPTURAL.
NOT SAYING THEY ARE BAD, BUT
THEY ARE NOT BIBLE-BASED.
>> SO HOW THEN DO I HANDLE A
SITUATION LIKE THAT?
>> GO BACK TO YOUR VOW.
WHAT WAS YOUR VOW?
WHAT WAS THE MARRIAGE?
IT WAS A COVENANT OF
COMPANIONSHIP.
THE VOW IS NOT IN SICKNESS AND
IN HEALTH WHERE THOSE ARE SOME
KIND OF OBJECTIVE STANDARDS THAT
CAN BE READDRESSED LATER ON.
THE COMMITMENT OF MARRIAGE IS A
ONE-WAY PLEDGE TO ANOTHER
PERSON.
I WILL BE YOUR COMPANION FOR THE
REST OF YOUR LIFE AND REMEMBER,
MARRIAGE IN THE BIBLE, AS AN
ORIGINAL INSTITUTION, IT WAS
ABOUT COMPANIONSHIP.
IT HAS *** COMPONENTS AND
FAMILY-BUILDING COMPONENTS BUT
THE BIBLE SAYS ADAM WAS ALONE
AND GOD SAID IT WAS NOT GOOD
THAT ADAM SHOULD BE ALONE.
HE DIDN'T MAKE WOMAN BECAUSE MAN
WAS A NINCOMPOOS AND NEEDED TO
BE NAGGED AND MOTIVATED.
[LAUGHTER]
>> MAN WAS ALONE AND NEEDED
COMPANIONSHIP AND GOD MADE WOMAN
FOR THAT COMPANIONSHIP.
AND THEN IT COMES TO THE
SITUATION WHERE THEY LEAVE
MOTHER AND FATHER BECAUSE WHEN
ADAM AND EVE WERE FIRST MADE,
THERE WAS NO MOTHER AND FATHER
YET.
BUT TO CLEAVE TO ONE ANOTHER IN
SUCH A WAY THAT THEY BECOME ONE.
SO IT IS NOT A CONTRACT AND IT
IS NOT A TEMPORARY ARRANGEMENT
THAT WE FEEL SO GOOD ABOUT EACH
OTHER THAT WE'LL LIVE TOGETHER,
IT IS TWO PEOPLE SAYING I
UNDERSTAND WHAT GOD'S PLAN IS,
IT IS FOR YOU TO HAVE A PARTNER
AND FOR TO US BUILD A FAMILY.
LET'S DO THAT.
>> WHEN IS DIVORCE ACCEPTABLE?
>> WE'LL LOOK AT SOME VERSES IN
A MINUTE BUT GENERALLY SPEAKING,
IT IS IN THE PRESENCE OF
UNREPENTED PORNEA WHERE IT IS
UNREPENTED AND UNRESOLVED.
>> SO IF A GUY IS WATCHING
*** ON HIS COMPUTER AND
WILL NOT STOP AFTER HIS WIFE
ASKS HIM TO, IS THAT A BASIS FOR
DIVORCE?
>> WELL, ADULTERY IS A VIOLATION
OF THE MARRIAGE BOND BUT
FORNIFICATION INCLUDES ALL
*** SINS OR PERVERSION.
IT WASN'T ADULTERY BECAUSE THEY
CHEATED ON YOU.
SO IN SOME WAYS IF YOU SAY I
HAVE A SPOUSE WHO IS INVOLVED IN
*** IMMORAL BEHAVIOR AND WILL
NOT REPENT OF IT, THOSE WOULD BE
THE GROUNDS FOR SEVERING THE
MARRIAGE VOW, NOT MANDATED BUT
REQUIRED AS AN OPTION.
THE BIBLICAL APPROACH IN THE NEW
TESTAMENT WOULD ALWAYS BE
RECONCILIATION, FORGIVENESS AND
GRACE BUT ALWAYS INCLUDES
REPENALTY E -- REPENTENCE.
IF THE UNBELIEVER SAYS I DON'T
WANT TO BE MARRIED TO YOU ANY
LONGER, BEFORE THAT STORY PLAYS
OUT IN THE PASSAGE.
PAUL SAYS IF YOU ARE MARRIED TO
THE UNBELIEVER AND THE
UNBELIEVER WANTS TO BE MARRIED
TO YOU, DO NOT DIVORCE THEM.
THE BELIEVER DOESN'T HAVE A
RIGHT TO DIVORCE THEM IF THE
UNBELIEVER STILL WANTS THEM.
SO THAT SEEMS TO BE THE NEXT
ALLOWANCE, THE REJECTION FROM AN
UNBELIEVING SPOUSE AND IMPLIED
BECAUSE OF YOUR FAITH, NOT
BECAUSE YOU HAVE A PAIN IN THE
NEXT OR AN OBNOXIOUS IRRITANT.
BUT THEY ARE NOT A BELIEVER,
THEY DON'T WANT TO BE MARRIED TO
YOU, YOU ARE FREE FROM THE
MARRIAGE IF THEY SHOULD DIVORCE
YOU.
>> HOW DO YOU DEFINE EXERTION?
>> THAT WOULD BE ABANDONING YOU
AND FAILURE TO FULFILL THEIR
ROLE OF MARRIAGE.
>> SO IF THEY DECIDE TO LIVE IN
ANOTHER STATE AND YOU ARE STILL
MARRIED, WHAT HAPPENS THERE?
>> IF THERE IS FINANCIAL
COMPENSATION COMING YOUR WAY, IT
IS NOT FULL ABANDONMENT.
IT IS ABANDONMENT OF THE
PRINCIPLE OF COMPANIONSHIP BUT
IT WOULD BE ABANDONMENT OF
SAYING I NO LONGER BELIEVE IN
FAITH.
IN THE OLD TESTAMENT, IT IS
ACCEPTABLE TO KILL SOMEBODY IN
SELF-DEFENSE.
AND THE BOOK BACKS THIS UP,
WE'RE TOLD.
YOU CAN KILL IN SELF-DEFENSE.
SO IN MY MIND IF YOU CAN KILL IN
SELF-DEFENSE, YOU CAN DIVORCE IN
SELF-DEFENSE IF YOU ARE
PHYSICALLY IMPERILLED.
IF YOUR LIFE IS IN DANGER OR THE
LIVES OF YOUR CHILDREN ARE IN
DANGER AND YOU NEED TO GET AWAY
FROM THAT ENVIRONMENT AND YOU
NEED LEGAL PROTECTION TO PREVENT
THEM FROM COMING INTO YOUR HOME
AT THEIR OWN WILL, IF YOU CAN
KILL 'EM, I THINK YOU CAN
DIVORCE THEM.
SO THAT WOULD BE THE THIRD
EXCEPTION OR ALLOWANCE.
BUT THE DEBATE TODAY IS WAS
JESUS SAYING THERE WAS NO
ALLOWANCE WHATSOEVER AND ONCE
YOU HAVE BEEN DIVORCED, ARE YOU
DISQUALIFIED FROM MINISTRY AND
CAN YOU NO LONGER BE MARRIED
AGAIN.
>> AND IF YOU DIVORCE WITHOUT
BIBLICAL GROUNDS, ANYONE THAT
MARES THAT WOMAN, WOULD THEY BE
LIVING IN ADULTERY?
>> NOT LIVING IN ADULTERY BUT
THE IMPLICATION IS YOU WOULD BE
COMMITTING ADULTERY BY MARRYING
THAT PERSON WHO HAS NOT BEEN
DIVORCED THROUGH A
SCRIPTURALLY-ENDORSED MEANS.
THE DIVORCE WAS INVALID SO IT
COMPLICATES.
YOU HEAR PEOPLE SAY THEY ARE
STILL MARRIED IN GOD'S EYES.
A DIVORCE, EVEN IF IT IS A
SINFUL DIVORCE, A NONBIBLE-BASED
DIVORCE, IT STILL SERVICE THE
MARRIAGE BOND.
YOU ARE STILL LITERALLY
DIVORCED, EVEN IF THE REASON WAS
WRONG BUT IF THERE IS FREEDOM TO
REMARRY, THAT IS THE ISSUE.
>> OKAY, IF THEY REMARRY AND
SOMEBODY THAT THEY MARRY JUST
LEFT THE OTHER ONE, NO BIBLICAL
GROUNDS, THEY TO GO CHURCH, THEY
ARE STARTING A WHOLE NEW LIFE,
CAN THEY EXPECT GOD'S BLESSING?
CAN THEY EXPECT -- AND I MEAN
SOMEBODY MIGHT LOOK AT 'EM AND
SAY BOY, THAT IS SUCH A -- THEY
TEACH SUNDAY SCHOOL CLASS AND
ARE ALWAYS HELPING PEOPLE, DOING
THINGS, I MEAN, WILL THEIR
LIFE -- BECAUSE THE BIBLE TALKS
ABOUT IF WE PRACTICE SIN, WE ARE
NONE OF HIS.
SO WOULDN'T THAT BE IN THE AREA
OF PRACTICING SIN?
>> NO.
THE WAY YOU LOOK AT IT IS ONCE
YOU ARE MARRIED TO SOMEONE, FOR
WHATEVER REASON, FOR WHATEVER
RIDICULOUS REASON YOU MAY HAVE
GOTTEN MARRIED IN THE FIRST
PLACE -- SOME PEOPLE TELL ME
WELL, WE WERE DRUNK WHEN WE WERE
MARRIED AND WE GOT MARRIED FOR
THE WRONG REASON SO OUR MARRIAGE
IS NOT VALIDATED.
DOESN'T MATTER.
ONCE YOU MARRY THAT PERSON, THE
REASON IS NOT AN ISSUE.
>> SO WHAT MAKES THAT A MARRIAGE
OF PASSION?
>> THE EVENT IN CORINTHIANS WERE
PAGANS MARRYING BELIEVERS.
AND SOME OF THOSE MAY HAVE HAD
THREE, FOUR WIVES WHICH WAS
COMMON IN THAT DAY OR HAD BEEN
MARRIED MULTIPLE TIMES.
THE QUESTION WAS WELL WHEN WE
GET SAVED, HOW DO WE ADDRESS
THIS ISSUE?
IF I HAD FOUR WIVES, DO I
DIVORCE THREE OF THEM BECAUSE I
AM NOW A BELIEVER?
AND PAUL SAYS BUT IF GOD HAS
DISTRIBUTED TO EACH ONE AS THE
LORD HAS CALLED EACH ONE, SO LET
HIM WALK.
LET EACH ONE REMAIN IN THE SAME
CALLING IN WHICH HE WAS CALLED.
BRETHERN, LET EACH ONE REMAIN
WITH GOD IN THAT STATE WITH
WHICH HE WAS CALLED.
I SUPPOSE THEREFORE THAT THIS IS
GOOD BECAUSE OF THE PRESENT
DISTRESS, THAT IT IS GOOD FOR
MAN TO REMAIN AS HE IS.
AND THEN THE NEXT QUESTION IS
ARE YOU BOUND TO A WIFE.
DO NOT SEEK TO BE LOOSE.
AND THE ISSUE IN THE CHURCH WAS
THIS CONVERSION CHANGE, THE
REPERCUSSIONS OF YOUR SINFUL
DEED OR DO YOU HAVE TO NOW LIVE
A FAITHFUL LIFE UNDER THE
CONDITIONS IN WHICH YOU GOT
SAVED AND PAUL'S ANSWER SEEMS TO
BE YES.
SO IF SOMEBODY HAS BEEN DIVORCED
AND GOTTEN REMARRIED AND WHETHER
THEY WERE SAVED OR NOT BEFORE
THEY DID IT, IF THEY ARE RIGHT
WITH THE LORD, THEY ARE TO LIVE
IN THAT CONDITION IN WHICH THEY
HAVE BEEN MADE RIGHT WITH THE
LORD AND LIVED OUT THEIR FAITH
IN THAT PREDICAMENT.
IF YOU ARE MARRIED TO SOMEONE
WHO IS NOT A CHRISTIAN, MARRIED
TO SOMEONE YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE
GOT MARRIED TO IN THE FIRST
PLACE, GETTING RIGHT WITH GOD
DOES NOT GIVE YOU THE RIGHT TO
NEGATE ALL THOSE COMMITMENTS AND
START OVER AGAIN.
YOU ARE TO LIVE FAITHFUL IN THE
PREDICAMENT THAT YOU CREATED,
SAME WAY AS IF YOUR ARM GOT CUT
OFF AND YOU BECAME A CHRISTIAN,
YOU WOULD LIVE THE REST OF YOUR
LIFE WITH ONE ARM.
YOU WOULDN'T GET TO GROW A
SECOND ARM BACK.
THE REPERCUSSIONS OF SIN ARE
LASTING BUT FORGIVENESS AND
GRACE ARE THERE.
AND LIKE IF YOU HAD MURDERED
SOMEONE, BEEN A THIEF, A
HOMOSEXUAL, DONE THINGS THE
BIBLE TALKED ABOUT IN
1ST CORINTHIANS, CHAPTER 6, IT
HAS A LIST OF THINGS THAT ARE
CLEANSED, AND MARRIAGE ISN'T
EVEN IN THERE.
A *** PERVERT, YOU CAN STILL
LIVE FOR GOD AFTER YOU HAVE BEEN
MADE RIGHT WITH THE LORD.
THAT WOULD APPLY TO AN IMPROPER
MARRIAGE, THE THIRD MARRIAGE YOU
SHOULDN'T HAVE DONE, APPLIES TO
THAT AS WELL.
DIVORCE IS NOT WORSE THAN ANY
OTHER SIN BUT SOMETIMES WE ACT
LIKE IT IS.
WE ACT LIKE THAT IS THE ONE THAT
DISQUALIFIES YOU FROM EVERYTHING
IF YOU HAVE BEEN DIVORCED AND
THAT IS NOT REALLY THE BIBLICAL
PRESENTATION.
>> MANY TIMES CHURCHES, FIRST
THING THEY ASK A PERSON, MAYBE
THAT THEY ARE CONSIDERING AS A
PASTOR, HAVE YOU BEEN DIVORCED.
IS THAT THE WAY IT IS TODAY OR
ARE WE KIND OF THROWING THAT
ASIDE?
>> WELL, IT IS GETTING SET ASIDE
BECAUSE OF REALITY.
WE ARE GETTING MUCH CLOSER TO A
PAGAN SOCIETY AS THE NEW
TESTAMENT CHURCH WAS WHERE THAT
IDEAL IS NO LONGER OUT THERE.
THERE IS NO LONGER ANY
GENERATION OF FAMILIES WHO HAVE
NOT HAD ANY DIVORCES IN THERE.
PEOPLE ARE SLEEPING WITH EACH
OTHER AT A GREATER FREQUENCY
WHERE IN THE CHRISTIAN
COMMUNITY, THEY TRIED TO STAY A
*** BEFORE GETTING MARRIED.
CHRISTIANS DON'T EVEN TEACH THAT
ANYMORE.
IT IS A SAD PITIFUL STATE BUT AN
EXAMPLE OF HOW PAGAN WE ARE
BECOMING.
>> IF A COUPLE COMES IN AND THEY
ARE BOTH BORN AGAIN AND THE
PASTOR ASKS THEM, ARE YOU BORN
AGAIN CAN, HOW DO YOU DEAL WITH
THAT?
>> I ASK THEM TO MOVE OUT.
FROM THE TIME I DO THE MARRIAGE
COUNSELING TO THE DAY THEY GET
MARRIED, I ASK THEM TO MOVE
APART AND REFRAIN FROM ***
ACTIVITY.
IF THEY HAVE CHILDREN AND HAVE
BEEN TOGETHER FIVE, SIX YEARS,
CAN'T MOVE OUT, I ASK THEM TO
REFRAIN FROM *** ACTIVITY
UNTIL THEY GET MARRIED OR DO A
SMALLER CEREMONY NOW AND THEN
HAVE A LARGER ONE LATER BUT TO
REFRAIN FROM *** ACTIVITY
UNTIL THE MARRIAGE.
>> IS THAT BIBLICAL?
>> I THINK IT IS.
WE ARE SUPPOSED TO REFRAIN FROM
SEX TILL HE COULD GET MARRIED
AND EVERY COUPLE WHO HAS DONE
WHAT I ASKED ON THAT ISSUE, THEY
TOLD ME WHAT AN INCREDIBLE
DIFFERENCE IT MADE IN THEIR
RELATIONSHIP BECAUSE FOR THE
FIRST TIME IN THEIR
RELATIONSHIP, THEY WERE FORCED
TO RELATE TO EACH OTHER
NONSEXUALLY.
SO THEY HAD TO DEVELOP
COMPANIONSHIP BECAUSE THEY HAD
TO TAKE SEX OUT OF THE PICTURE.
SO FROM THE TIME THEY GOT
MARRIED SIX MONTHS LATER, THEY
HAD NOT HAD SEX IN SIX MONTHS,
THE HONEYMOON MEANT SOMETHING
AND THEY WERE ABLE TO ADD SEX SO
THEIR RELATIONSHIP RATHER THAN
IT BE BASED ON SEX WHICH IS NOT
A GOOD FOUNDATION FOR A
RELATIONSHIP BECAUSE SEX IS TOO
SUBJECTIVE AND VICTIMIZED BY THE
EMOTIONS OF ANY GIVEN DAY.
SEX IS NOT A FOUNDATION FOR
MARRIAGE.
IT IS A PART OF MARRIAGE, AN
ASPECT OF MARRIAGE.
WHEN IT COMES TO DIVORCE,
JEREMIAH3.08, GOD DIVORCED
ISRAEL AND MALACHAI TELLS US
THAT GOD HATES DIVORCE BUT HE
DIVORCED ISRAEL AND A
RELATIONSHIP HE HAD MANY, MANY
TIMES.
SO IF GOD HATES DIVORCE AND
DIVORCE IS SIN, WHY IN THE WORLD
WOULD GOD DO THAT TO ISRAEL?
AND IN EEZRA, HE HAS TO DIVORCE
HIS PAGAN WIVES TO GET RIGHT
WITH GOD.
SO IF DIVORCE IS A SIN, WHY
WOULD HE DIVORCE ISRAEL AND TELL
JUICE WHO ARE GETTING RIGHT WITH
HIM TO DIVORCE THEIR WIVES IN
THAT PARTICULAR SITUATION.
THE DIVORCE ITSELF IS NOT SIN
BUT THE DETERIORATION OF THE
MARRIAGE THAT IS SIN.
GOT HATES THE REALITY OF
DIVORCE, THAT IT HAS TO HAPPEN
BUT HE WILL NOT HESITATE TO
DIVORCE HIS OWN PEOPLE WHEN THEY
WERE UNFAITHFUL TO HIM
REPEATEDLY AFTER EVERY OTHER
GOD.
THE BIBLE SAYS NUMEROUS TIMES IN
THE OLD TESTAMENT, HE DIVORCED
THEM BUT CALLED THEM BACK TO
RECONCILIATION AS THEY WOULD
REPENT BUT HE HATES DIVORCE.
HE HATES THE DISSOLUTION OF A
UNION THAT GOD INTENDS TO BE
PERMANENT BUT IT IS STILL A
REALITY.
SO WHEN MOSES GAVE THE
REGULATION OF DIVORCE, HE WASN'T
CONDONING DIVORCE OR
ESTABLISHING IT, THAT HERE IS
YOUR RIGHT TO DO THIS.
HE WAS SAYING SINCE DIVORCE
ALREADY EXISTS IN EVERY CULTURE
OF THAT DAY, AND CERTAINLY THE
JEWISH CULTURE, IT MUST BE
REGULATED BY THESE PRINCIPLES
AND THAT IS THE WRITINGS OF
DIVORCEMENT THAT THE DESCRIBES
AND PHARISSEES WERE TALKING TO
JESUS ABOUT.
AND JESUS SAID YOU ARE MISSING
THE WHOLE POINT.
GOD NEVER INTENDED FOR THERE TO
BE DIVORCE BUT BECAUSE OF THE
HARDNESS OF YOUR HEART, IT WAS
ALLOWED AND MOSES REGULATED THE
WAY IT HAD TO BE DONE TO STOP
THE HARDNESS OF HEARTS.
>> HOW DOES HARDNESS OF HEARTS
MANIFEST ITSELF?
>> THAT CLIP YOU PLAYED BEFORE
WHICH I HAD NEVER HEARD BEFORE,
BY THE WAY, BUT IT JUST JUMPED
OUT, IT IS BITTERNESS.
EITHER AT A PERSON OR GOD, IF
WE'RE BITTER AT A PERSON WE'RE
BITTER AT GOD FOR ALLOWING THAT
PERSON IN OUR LIVES AND WE END
UPHOLDING GOD RESPONSIBLE.
SO HARDNESS OF HEART BECOMES
NONSUBMISSIVE TO THE WILL OF GOD
IN YOUR LIFE BECAUSE YOU WANT
SATISFACTION OR HAPPINESS OR
FULFILLMENT OR RELIEF.
THEREFORE I AM GOING MY WAY AND
NOT GOD'S WAY, THAT IS HARDNESS
OF THE HEART.
AND JESUS SAID THAT IS THE
REASON WE HAVE DIVORCE, NOT JUST
BECAUSE OF *** IMPHAORLT,
THAT IS THE REASON FOR IT TAKING
PLACE BUT THE CAUSE OF IT IS
MAN'S HEART GETTING HARD BECAUSE
OF THE RESPONSE OF ***
IMMORALITY.
JESUS SAYS YOU FORGIVE THE
IMMORALITY AND RESTORE THE
MARRIAGE BUT BECAUSE OF THE
HARDNESS OF YOUR HEART, MOSES
SAYS YOU COULD DIVORCE.
BUT WHAT WAS HAPPENING IN THAT
DAY AND YOU SEE THE RESPONSE OF
THE BELIEVERS THAT WERE THERE,
THEY SAY WOW, WE SHOULD NEVER
GET MARRIED THEN.
BECAUSE THEY WERE USED TO HAVING
ANY REASON TO GET DIVORCED.
A MAN COULD PRETTY MUCH CONTROL
THE DESTINY OF A WOMAN BY HIS
PERSONAL PLEASURE IN HER.
>> LIKE THE MUSLIMS TODAY.
>> VERY SIMILAR.
>> THAT WAS:IN THE MIDDLE EAST
AND COMMON IN THE CHURCH IN
THEIR EARLY DAYS WHERE JUICE
WERE STILL PRACTICING POLYGAMY
AND GETTING SAVED AND COMING
INTO THE CHURCH AND STILL HAVING
THE IDEA OF DIVORCE THAT COULD
BE DONE FOR ANY REASON BECAUSE
WOMEN ARE HERE TO COMPLIMENT AND
ADD TO MEN'S LIVES AND IF THEY
ARE NOT ADDING TO MY LIFE, I CAN
GET RID OF THEM.
THAT WAS A PREDOMINANT THOUGHT
PROCESS SO WHEN JESUS SAID THAT,
GOD NEVER INTENDED IT AND YOU
CAN'T GET DIVORCED BECAUSE OF
*** IMMORALITY AND IF YOU DO
THAT, YOU ARE CAUSING THE WOMAN
TO COMMIT ADULTERY AND SO THAT
WAS RADICAL AND JESUS SAID THAT
IS TRUE BUT THAT IS ONLY TO A
GIVEN FEW.
NOT EVERYONE CAN BE ***
ABSTINENT IN YOUR LIFE.
GOD SAYS IT IS BETTER TO MARRY
THAN TO BURN IN YOUR PASSION.
THAT IS WHY HE RECOMMENDED
WIDOWS GET REMARRIED.
NOTHING IS WRONG WITH THE
MARRIAGE ITSELF, THERE ARE VALID
REASONS FOR REMARRIAGE AND ONE
IS WIDOWS AND THAT WOULD APPLY
TO PEOPLE WHO HAVE GOTTEN
DIVORCED AT A YOUNG AGE.
IF THEY HAVE GOTTEN DIVORCED, IT
WOULD BE BETTER FOR THEM TO FIND
A PARTNER THAN TO BURN IN THEIR
PASSION AND LIVE IMMORALLY.
>> SO PEOPLE CONTEMPLATING
MARRIAGE AND SOME THAT ARE
WATCHING CONTEMPLATING
DIVORCE --
>> SURE.
>> EITHER ONE OF THOSE ISSUES
SHOULD MAKE YOUR KNEES TREMBLE.
GETTING MARRIED IS A STATEMENT
OF CHARACTER AND SPIRIT AND A
VOW TO GOD, NOT TO THE OTHER
PERSON.
WE REMEMBER THEM IN OUR CEREMONY
BUT IT IS A VOW TO GOD, I WILL
ACCEPT THIS RESPONSIBILITY TO
MINISTER AND LOVE THIS PERSON
THE REST OF MY LIFE.
YOU ARE MAKING A PROMISE TO GOD.
I DON'T THINK YOU SHOULD GET
MARRIED UNTIL YOU ARE READY TO
KEEP A COMMITMENT AND YOU KNOW
YOU ARE READY IF YOU HAVE KEPT
OTHER COMMITMENTS IN YOUR LIFE
BUT DON'T GET MARRIED BECAUSE
YOU ARE IN LOVE.
THAT IS SUBJECT TO ALL SORTS OF
FORCES, MAKE THE COMMITMENT.
NOW, IF YOU ARE GOING TO GET
DIVORCED AND TALK ABOUT GETTING
DIVORCED, THAT, TOO, IS AN
INCREDIBLY DIFFICULT DECISION.
IT IS A STATEMENT YOU ARE MAKING
TO THE LORD.
THE BIBLE TELLS US OUR MAIN
RESPONSIBILITY IS TO BE TRUE TO
GOD, TO WALK HUMBLY WITH HIM AND
SEEK MERCY AND JUSTICE.
THAT IS WHAT HE REQUIRES OF US,
MALACHAI TELLS US.
SO WHETHER YOU ARE GETTING
MARRIED OR DIVORCED OR DECIDING
TO STAY SINGLE, WE DO IT FOR THE
LORD.
WHETHER YOU EAT, DRINK, WHAT SO
EVER YOU DO, MARRIAGE, DIVORCE
OR SINGLE, DO ALL TO THE GLORY
OF GOD.
OUR PURPOSE AND OUR GOAL IS TO
GLORIFY OUR LORD IN OUR
RELATIONSHIPS SO THE WORLD CAN
SEE THE LOVE OF CHRIST IN THE
WAY WE TREAT OTHER PEOPLE.
SUBMIT YOUR HEART TO THE LORD
AND WATCH HIM SOFTEN YOUR HARD
HEART AND FILL IT WITH LOVE.
>> AND TO ADD, ONLY, DON'T BE
UNEQUALLY YOKED.
THAT IS SO IMPORTANT.
HAVE COMMON INTERESTS.
GOD BLESS YOU.