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MY BROTHER BUDDHIST MONK
It fit in nicely. - You were right.
What next?
I'm going to Thailand -
to be ordained as a monk for the second time in my life.
For the rest of my life.
I'll get the other one.
When I leave an apartment, I usually leave a small altar there.
Just for fun.
It's always sad when you leave a nice place behind.
It was fun while it lasted.
You're not recording. - I am.
I can't see the Rec light. Does it say Rec? - Yes.
First, I couldn't understand my brother's wish -
to be a Buddhist monk in Thailand.
He'd be far away. I was afraid of losing him totally.
I've always looked after my little brother Santeri.
Our father died when I was 10 and Santeri was only 2.
I was a bit like a second parent to him.
Is he crazy?
Us siblings have gathered for the last time before Santeri leaves.
It's sad to think he chooses the lonely life of a monk.
Look at this shot!
It was my childhood dream. To drive an ATV.
I never had one, I only had a moped.
As a sister, I'm anxious...
I'm afraid you will miss something...
Like sharing something with your family or with a woman.
It's not about torturing yourself, it's about giving up things.
It's about simplifying.
We're trying to reach happiness through meditation.
Well, I guess I must try and convince myself you'll be happy.
If I started thinking about you going away -
and giving up everything, -
nobody will caress your head or hug you -
and nobody will tell you they love you.
That would be a very sad thought.
Will it fit?
Look, Santeri! - Yes, a cushion.
Lift from the other end.
It's a good sofa, you should keep it.
A Buddhist monk cannot own anything.
I was sad to see Santeri give up all his possessions.
I'm not going to miss the things, but I'll miss the old Santeri.
Our aunt, her partner and our little cousins -
wanted to see Santeri before he left.
I just hope you really want this and it's not a rash decision.
People don't always get work right after they finish school.
If I had everything in order, had a girlfriend, -
had a job and regular income...
I don't know if I had made the same decision then.
I felt this was the last moment to leave now, -
or I'd have a family soon...
Why can't a monk have a wife? To put it blankly.
If you always had a girl here or there, -
it would mix up your thoughts.
Your hormones would take over, -
and you couldn't possibly reach such a spiritual state... - Meditation.
I've been there once already, -
lived in the monastery for 2,5 years -
so I know quite well what to expect.
I've studied it and I think I fulfil the requirements -
to be a Buddhist monk and to stay there for the rest of my life.
That's the vow I'm taking, -
that's what I want to do in my life, sink or swim.
Do you want to take a shower?
I couldn't really sleep. I was so overwrought.
Not at all depressed, hopeful, more like it.
It's wonderful that he's finally going there.
It's bliss, it's a blessing.
It opens up ways for us to practice Buddhism as well.
This is exciting.
Are you going to be okay today? - Yes, I will be.
I don't feel Thailand is too far away.
The world is so much smaller these days.
I wonder if this is ready? Oatmeal.
The next time Mom will see Santeri, -
he will have robes, his head is shaved and she can't touch him.
Soon, the old Santeri won't exist.
Something new and unknown will emerge.
When will you come to Thailand?
We'll see how it goes for me. - Once you settle down there.
Goodbye. See you soon.
Metta! Sadhu, sadhu, sadhu!
Bye!
Buddhism has a sincere goal of clarifying things -
and seeing things as they really are.
The focus is on seeing the suffering in this life -
and to look for a more permanent satisfaction -
than this life here can offer.
I decided to follow Santeri's journey to the monastery -
and try to understand his decision.
We're in Bangkok, it's quite hot here.
Do you think it's hot? - Yes.
Monks are walking there somewhere on their morning alms rounds.
It feels weird to be here again.
Quite a decision.
Are you still thinking of your ex-girlfriend?
Yes, we've exchanged messages.
But my decision is so strong, -
and if all these external issues are solved so that I can become a monk -
then I'll become a monk.
Of course, a girlfriend would be nice, but I'm prepared...
I'm ready for...
that I won't have one.
It seems so quiet.
Here are some people, at least.
Hello.
Can I help you?
Are there any monks? - Monk?
Monks over there. - Any monks over here?
No, now they are drinking. - Drinking tea?
One moment, please.
You're nervous. - Yes, a little.
How are you? - Fine, thanks.
Where are you from? - Little bit excited. Finland.
You wrote the letter? - Yes, I did.
Where are you from? - I'm from Australia.
Did you ordain here in Wat Marp Jan? - Yes, I sure did.
About three years go. - Three years ago?
I used to be a monk in Wat Pah Nanachat. - Oh, yeah. Cool.
So you decided to come back and ordain again? - Yes.
Are you going to ordain for a long time this time?
If I become a monk, I'm going to try and stay a monk for the rest of my life.
It's good. What happened last time?
Kilesa (mental defilements). - We all got them.
No, I don't know... I was quite young, 21, when I came to the monastery.
How old are you now? - 26.
I'll go tell the Ajahn that you're here. - OK.
When we go in, bow three times.
You can come.
For a long time, Santeri has admired the teachings -
of the esteemed meditation teacher Ajahn Anan.
I was so nervous, the camera shook in my hands.
He said that just for tonight, we'll get you to stay in the sala.
And tomorrow, we'll get you a proper kuti.
The first days were pretty tough.
Somehow, Santeri changed when we came to the monastery.
If you've been a monk already, it's difficult to start anew.
And having your sister there does not help.
Eating as a layman caused me anxiety.
It was painful to see that all the monks go to eat first.
Then the pakhows or anagarikas (pre-novice monks) follow.
And I have to go after everyone else.
Can I have a bowl for my food?
Are you in a bad mood today?
No, I'm in a good mood, you just annoy me a little.
Why? - I wanted to eat in peace.
Let's see the kuti.
The Buddha said that everyone needs to learn to see for themselves -
what he says in his teachings about the four noble truths.
No-one can be enlightened for others.
Someone has swept these already. Some friendly person.
It's not easy, living as a monk.
But I enjoy challenges in my life. Otherwise, life would be boring.
Do you speak English? - No.
How do you like your new abode?
It's very good. Perfect.
It's up here on the hill and the walking meditation path is good.
An unusual place.
I need to process this place. I have everything here.
You don't even have a mattress.
I'll spread my yoga mat here.
Will you be there at 5 pm?
That's when I'll know about the pakhow.
What's pakhow? - My head is shaved.
I get a white robe and then I can eat with the monks.
See the snake? It's killing a frog.
Oh my goodness!
So anyway, I talked to the Ajahn and he said:
Because with the Westerners it's more of a long-term thing, -
and so it's one thing to say Yes, I'm here for life -
but it's another thing actually to do it...
Because he has to put a lot of commitment into you -
so he needs to get some commitment from your side.
He knows you've already been through the process, -
but to come back here, it's like starting again.
I don't know how long the process will go for.
But what he said is like yeah, you shave your head -
and take on the eight precepts and be living like a pakhow.
I'm happy, so there's still hope. That's the best thing.
I feel bad to see you lose your hair.
Offering to the Buddha.
Are you ready? - Yeah.
Sure?
How long do you think you are ordaining for? One month or...
No, longer. - Longer?
As long as possible. Maybe for the whole lifetime.
Now that Santeri becomes a monk ordination candidate, -
I can't be alone with my brother without another male present.
A certain kind of closeness disappears -
but maybe it's replaced with something else. Something deeper.
For some reason, I felt like crying. But I didn't want to let Santeri see it.
Thank you.
I'm happy that you decided to ordain.
You're happy? - Yeah. Thank you.
It's a great feeling to cut off all your hair.
Have you ever done it? - No.
It's a symbol of renunciation. Renouncing the world.
In the monastery, one thinks of the great questions of life.
That life has to have some other meaning.
I wanted to ask Santeri's teacher -
if he could tell me how to lead a good life.
If we seek happiness externally, -
making material things our primary source of happiness, -
no matter how long we search, we will never find genuine happiness.
So we need to develop the mind within, -
bringing it to see in accordance with truth.
Seeing happiness, seeing suffering, these things arise in the heart, -
they are neither permanent nor certain.
This is what will allow us to meet with genuine happiness, -
a happiness that transcends the world.
Of course, coming to a forest monastery -
is not easy to give up all modern conveniences you're used to.
You notice that pain and suffering surface much more in your mind.
But I came here to make the life of a monk my profession.
Before I left, I bought survival things for my little brother in the woods.
Pretty soon I realized I have to let go.
Let my brother lead his own life.
It's safe to be here.
I have Krooba Ajahns, monks that I respect, very near me.
I feel their metta, loving kindness.
It's like coming home.
Are you leaving the monastery a better person now?
I think I'm a bit better.
I'm happy to stay here.
Call me. - Let's stay in touch.
Have a good trip. I'm leaving. - Bye!
I feel it's the right decision to make, not just for me, -
but also for my family, mother and everyone.
I think this can inspire them to think in a new way.
I guess I was afraid I'd lose my brother altogether.
But I think that robes or no robes, Santeri will always be my little brother.
You're on? - Yes.
We've got a major development, he's going to ordain as a monk today.
He's not ordaining as a novice, they'll ordain him as a monk.
He's going to ordain straight away.
He's a bit nervous and excited.
Suddenly, he has to know all that by heart.
He's taking it seriously. - Yes.
Look at how happy he is, laughing. He's relieved now.
The ordination is over now. - Now he's happy.