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I think was GK Chesterton who said this - he said that
every person knocking on the door of a brothel
is looking for God. And
he's actually right. In the end, all
ecstasy is, even the search for drugs which was certainly a part
of my life - I took a lot of drugs - even in that,
in the search for ecstasy, is actually a search to find something
bigger than life.
Human beings are not just thinking creatures, we're not just feeling creatures, we have great
need and desire that kinda drives us to, to, to
to find fulfillment. And one of the things of spirituality is a great,
robust yearning,
and I think ultimately that yearning can only be found in God. So
for me, I think God has given me a wonderful opening to actually,
to operate within what I think I'm called to do.
So I'm, I'm enjoying
getting older in some ways - I'm not happy with what's happening in the body,
there's always something wrong now. I dread
what's going to happen in 10, 10 more years, but the other side is that
what's happening on the inside - I love it. It's interesting
in getting older, you actually become your own person - you own your skin.
At 53, it's, it's been good and, and the forties were kinda good, too.
Thirties, you're kinda still putting it together. Twenties, it's like
complex, and you gotta work it out. It's like a big, giant puzzle that has been put on
onto the table and you have to now put it together, and I think a good
twenty-something ought to kinda be puzzling with things. I reckon with the puzzle
idea is: by the end of your twenties, you've gotta have
you know, the, like you put the piles of different colors so you could begin to
sort them. And by the end of your twenties, you gotta have the
the edges done. In the thirties, you're kinda putting the puzzle together. They seem to
come together when you're
in your forties, and the puzzle makes a lot more sense later on
in life, so live well and
keep, keep exploring the puzzle. It makes more sense as you get along
and even if it doesn't always intellectually, it does existentially make
sense in our souls.
Life makes a lot more sense now in the fifties than it did in the
twenties.
Ultimately, there is a spirituality component to that because I think
we find our destiny, our true purpose in
who God is and what he's got for our lives.