Tip:
Highlight text to annotate it
X
you are michelle?
yes marty i'm michelle
thanks for staying in the office late tonight after everyone else left
they told me that if i impressed you that i could get elected to some kind of office
yes that's true. i hold some power over this neighborhood
you see, a long time ago, i was an important person
i was king of all you see here
if you make me happy and do what i say when you are in office we can go places kid
uh... holdon a second is it 9pm? I have to take my prozac
so, tell me about yourself
your history, your family, let's see if you're electable
well i was a legal intern kinda like Monica Lewinsky and i was a federal prosecutor in
the nineteen seventies
so we call you a FORMER FEDERAL PROSECUTOR
it costs a lot of money to run for office you have to buy votes if you can
but sometimes people will vote for you if you just buy them a beer.
i can give you a list of suckers that have donated in the past
but that won't be enough money
how do you plan to raise funds?
i know a little old lady in the suburbs
i bet i can soak her for at least six figures if i do it slowly.
you will have to put some of your own skin
in the game
well i have my daughter's college fund.
i love her very much.
i and spent three whole months is a girl scout troop leader for her.
michele think of the possibilities if you win!
as an alderman you will have big businesses paying your tons under the table just to
build a condo in the ward
oh... i like my condo
i don't have to worry about black people breaking in.
okay i'll cash in my daughter's college fund.
good deal! so you were a girl scout mother?
tell me about your husband and daughter?
would they be willing to pose for nice family photos?
well there might be a problem there.
do you have any cute dogs or pets?
anything that can make you seem likable?
no, the condo board would not let me keep all five of my cats.
did i tell you that i am a FORMER FEDERAL PROSECUTOR?
i could get a haircut like Hillary did
Boy, that prozac really kicks off the hot flashes here!
sorry where were you?
you were telling me good things about me.
you like me?
with the right coaching you could go all the way.
how long have you lived in the forty third?
for twenty nine years. but i might have spent a little "extended vacation" time in wisconsin.
well have you at least always voted here?
please marty let me run, what else am i going to do? it is not like i have a job
or a man in my life.
and did i tell you that i am a FORMER FEDERAL PROSECUTOR?
you're a FORMER FEDERAL PROSECUTOR.
yes i'm a FORMER FEDERAL PROSECUTOR.
do you think that voters should know
that i am a FORMER FEDERAL PROSECUTOR?
you should also tell them that you were a friend of Marty Oberman.
that's a good idea marty!
I am a former federal prostitutor endorsed by Naughty Oberweis.
let me practice that.
i am a former federal prostitutor endorsed by Naughty Oberweis.
no michelle it's prosecutor not prostitutor.
and Marty Oberman not Naughty Oberweis.
got it prosecutor not prostitutor.
Marty not naughty and Oberman not wise.
is there anything else bad that that i need to know about you?
Naughty, i mean Marty, I may have had some financial problems and i might have had a
relationship with scott lee cohen.
oh good grief! this is not going to work.
please marty, i'll buy beer votes, i will smile, i will cut my hair, i will get a new
wardrobe i would do anything for this...
wooh, my prozac is really kicking in
it makes me frisky you know, like my cats
michelle by like your haircut. I am sure we can think of something for you to do
and even if you spend a half million and lose the aldermans race there is still ward
committeeman as the *** prize.
speaking of ***, where did i put those little blue pills?
i think they may go well with your prozac
Naughty Marty!