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I wondered, hey, you know,
is God there? Do I have a relationship with him? It's like I, I think I did. I, I
thought I did.
But I was in a season of wrestling, wondering if
if God is really there.
It was like, it was like, growing up my, my dad would say -
I can remember specific, in a specific instance we had this
garage, it was called "the big garage" and so it was more like a shed
and he would say, "hey, go get, go get a rake."
And I remember specifically going to look for this rake and coming
back and telling him, "hey, it's not there,"
or "I cant find it," and he responded, "hey, look until you find it." And so I went back and
and looked for this rake and I'd go back to him and say, "dad, the rake's not there. I can't
find it. I don't,
I don't know where it is," and he'd say, "go back and look until you find it."
And I'd go and look again and now frustrated,
you know, tears in my eyes, "dad, it's not there. The rake's not there.
I'm tired of looking." And so he
came with me and you know, of course walked right to it and grabbed the rake and said,
"I thought you said this wasn't there."
See I thought my truth was there was no rake,
but the reality was it was right there
and so you can live under anything and call it truth,
but there's still a reality. There's still, there's still a truth,
and if that truth is there, then
then we need to find it. And to say that it's not there is just to not know it.
I think that, that waking up and that realization that God is with me
and that God wants to give me life. He does not want to rip me off - he wants to
give me life. He wants to set me free.
That has taught me there really is a God - a Creator of all things.
And realizing that God's there you know, changed everything.