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Let's get into I Peter chapter 3.
We're going to be talking
about wives and husbands
and you know, when you
bring up wives and husbands,
it seems like the word forgiveness,
you know, needs to be in there as well.
Right? It's where this is lived out,
(chuckles from audience) this forgiveness
of God is lived out in these marriage relationships.
What I'm going to do, we're just going to
go through the first seven verses today.
I'm going to read those seven verses,
and then we're going to go
back through and pick out
some key points that Peter is trying to make.
"Wives, in the same way,
"submit yourselves to your own husbands
"so that if any of them do not
"believe the word, they may be won over
"without words but by the behavior of their wives
"when they see the purity and reverence of your lives.
"Your beauty should not come from
"outward adornment,
"such as elaborate hairstyles,
"and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes.
"rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty
"of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great
"worth in God's sight.
"For this is the way the holy women of the past
"who put their hope in God, used to adorn themselves.
"They submitted themselves to their own husbands like Sarah,
"who obeyed Abraham and called him her lord.
"You who are--
"You are her daughters if you do what is right, and do not give way
"to fear. Husbands, in the same way, be considerate
"as you live with your wives and treat them with respect
"as the weaker partners,
"and as heirs with you of the gracious
"gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayer."
So, that's the passage,
I want to step back a little bit
and put it in its context.
You know, so often, when we look at
marriage relationships,
what the word of God has to say about
marriage relationships,
we go to the key passages in the New Testament.
We lift those passages out of its pages,
out of its context; we place them over here
and we just look at them in this small segment.
But that's not how these passages are
intended to be read and understood.
There's a context, and context is so vitaly
important. Without context, we're going
to misinterpret what the
word of God has to say in this regard.
So let's step back, and look at the context.
What has Peter been discussing?
He's been discussing the fact
that we are a holy priesthood.
That anyone who has come to Christ by faith,
has been added to the body of Christ.
Has been made into a living stone.
We were old dead stones, no life in us at
all, but through the precious blood of Christ,
through His death, burial and resurrection,
we've been given new life.
So, we were dead stones,
now we are living stones, and we are being
placed into this new building of God
called the Temple.
We have a role there.
We have a particular assignment.
We are called to be a holy priesthood.
That's our assignment.
That assignment is equally given
to male and female.
We tracking? We together?
So, husband, if you're a believer,
you're a member of the body
of Christ, you are a living stone
you are being built up into this
holy dwelling place of God.
You're a priest in His service.
Wife.
If you're a believer in Christ,
you are a living stone,
God has poured His life into you,
you are being placed into this
structure that God is building called
the Temple, His dwelling place, and you
serve as a priest in His service.
So, husband and wife,
you have the same role as far as
God is concerned within the body.
You both equally serve in this capacity
as holy priests.
Is that right, or wrong? It's right, isn't it?
Everybody just shake your head,
Bob, you are exactly right on this point.
(chuckles) It's true. okay?
In Christ, the gift of God's spirit is given
to both male and female.
New life is given to both male and female.
All are called sons of God;
both male and female.
Now, when He says you are called the son of God,
that doesn't talk about gender,
that talks about full rights.
So the inheritance that God has
is equally given out
to male and female.
In Christ, there is no male or female;
So the word is very, very clear.
That we all participate in the
blessings of God equally.
Boy, does that attack
our human thinking.
Does that attack the way the world
has progressed from the very beginning?
Gosh, there are so many societies
women have been treated as sub-human.
They have been treated as second class.
They have been treated as inferior
beings in the hierarchy of the world order.
Is that true?
The way the world has seen it, but it's not
the way God sees it.
That's the context that
Peter has set up, that we've
all, both male and female,
through faith in Christ,
have been born again into a living hope.
We have the word of God residing
in us, we have an assignment as priests
to carry out whether or male or female.
Now, in the world, as we attempt
to carry out that assignment,
we're going to be met with opposition.
As a result of that, we're going to
experience suffering.
That's what we talked about last week,
how to live Godly lives,
how to carry out this function
as a priest in a pagan world.
In a world that is anti-God,
anti-Christ anti-Christian.
How do we carry out
and live our lives amidst that opposition?
We look specifically about submitting our
selves to every human authority.
How are we, as believers
going to make a difference
in this world?
Are we going to make a difference by
becoming troublemakers? Are we going to
make a difference by quietly carrying
out the work that God has given us.
What Peter is saying, is if we would just go
about our business, then we will see
incredible things start to happen.
He took a specific situation,
slaves, you know, back in that day, 60%
of the world's population, according to
some historians, were slaves.
So, this gospel message
was going forth into the world.
People were responding.
And they were receiving life.
They were being born again.
They were being made into living stones;
they were given a task, an assignment of
being a priest in the service of God.
These folks that worked for masters
in a master-slave relationship,
they're starting to ask, "How do I do this?"
This guy that's over me, is a jerk.
How do I handle that?
So, Peter addressed that.
Now in chapter 3,
he's going to address another situation.
Wives, in the same way,
same way as what? As slaves, who are
submitting themselves to their masters,
or just believe at large committing
themselves to every human authority.
Wives, in the same way, submit
yourselves to your own husbands.
So that, if any of them
do not believe the word,
they may be won over
without words by the behavior of their wives.
So, what's the situation here?
The gospel message has gone forth.
This good news has been preached.
Could have been preached by Peter,
could have been preached by Paul;
could have been preached
by one of the other apostles,
or someone else who had come to know the Lord.
That message went out.
The message that Jesus Christ
is a savior; is THE savior.
And He saves us through
His death, His burial, His resurrection,
His ascension into heaven.
That good news when it enters a human heart,
generates a response of faith, and new
life comes. Conversion takes place
That message went out.
There was a lot of instances
where that message hit the
heart of the woman, the wife,
and not the heart of the man.
So you have a situation that Peter is
addressing specifically; the wife is saved,
she is a living stone.
She has been placed into the body of Christ.
She has been given a task to serve as a
priest for the living God.
Her husband is lost.
That's the scene.
So, what's the most natural question for a
wife to ask in that scenario?
What can I do
to bring my husband to the Lord?
How do I go about that task?
That's the question on the table
that's what Peter is addressing.
We all together?
Have any of you ladies found yourself
in that position?
You're saved, your husband is not.
Ruth, you were in that position.
weren't you?
I bet you went to bed almost every single night
saying, What can I do?"
What can I say? How can I get
my husband to see the truth?
That right? That's exactly right.
This is what Peter is addressing.
So, if you're in that situation,
listen to what Peter is saying.
So wives, in the same way,
submit yourselves to your own husbands.
He's a jerk!
He's mean.
He takes advantage.
And you're telling me to be in submission?
Something wrong with that brain
of yours up there, Peter?
No, he says, be in submission
and that word means to place under
in an orderly fashion.
That's what that word means.
So he's already told us that
believers in general should be in
submission to every human authority,
whether to the Emperor as the supreme authority,
or to governors same exact word.
We should place ourselves
under those authorities
under an orderly fashion.
Now, this is a willing submission.
This is a decision that
you as a wife are making.
Totally separate from your husband. Okay?
Totally separate from your husband.
You're having a conversation with the Lord.
You're having a prayer with Him.
You are laying out the situation that you're in.
I have this husband, who doesn't know You.
More than anything in life, I want him
to come to faith in You.
I don't know what I'm supposed to do,
I don't know what I'm supposed to say,
I don't know how I'm supposed
to carry out in this relationship.
I'm bringing it to you.
And the word of God comes back,
"I want you to willingly submit to your husband."
That's the decision between
you and the Lord.
No one else.
That's something you're deciding upon.
The minute the husband gets involved,
and says, "You need to submit to me"
is the very minute that he's crossed the line.
Because this was word is to wives.
Husbands? Do we hear this?
This word is to wives.
They chose to listen, or not.
And you have no say. Do you get that?
Well, I want to help
my wife fulfill her duties to the Lord
and let me just lay out 10 things
that she needs to do in order to be
submissive to me.
That's not what this is all about.
This is the situation where the wife
wants to see her husband
come to know Christ. She is willingly
saying, "For that purpose, for that sake,
"I'm going to submit myself to him."
Because it says if any of them
do not believe, the word.
They've never obeyed.
Now, here's the deal:
you know, as a wife, you've
come to Christ, you're excited
about this relationship with the Lord,
and you just start talking
to your husband about the Lord.
And you just keep saying,
"Hey, you need to come to Christ,
You need to receive Him."
and you keep talking,
and you keep talking
and you keep talking.
And the more you talk,
the less response you get.
Right? You ever been
in that situation? Kind of like the husband is
saying, "If you'd just shut up,
maybe I would you know... take a look."
like my friend Tim, used to work with us.
He was a bartender.
He met his wife at a bar.
She was a cocktail waitress.
He was pouring up the drinks.
Her mom and dad and gotten
involved in a Bible Study,
and they invited Deb to a Bible study,
her life was changed.
Then she just started, you know
hitting on Tim.
"You need to come to this Bible Study"
I mean, 'You gotta come to this Bible Study!"
You need to be saved!
Bah-bah-bah-bah,
Bah-bah-bah-bah,
Bah-bah-bah-bah,
Bah-bah-bah-bah, Bah!
Finally Tim looked at her and said,
"Just please, leave me alone!"
So Deb said okay.
Didn't say a word about it.
Just went about living her life.
About two months later, Tim said
I want to go to that Bible Study.
I think her jaw dropped.
She said, "Okay, let's go!"
They went to the Bible Study
and Tim got questions answered.
He went back home and in the quietness
of his bedroom, gave his heart to the Lord.
That's the situation you've got men
who don't believe the word.
They've heard their wives say all kinds of
things and yet, they still won't receive.
So he's saying, " Win them over without
words, but by your behavior.
By your way of life.
By their manner of doing things.
Says when they see the purity
and reverence of your lives,
it's going to make a difference.
It's going to show them
that this isn't just a fad.
How many of you as kids,
you know, came to Christ
you went and told your parents,
"Hey, I've given my heart to the Lord,"
you got a response from your mom and dad
"Oh, that's just a fad, it will go away, soon. "
Anybody?
That's a common response.
It's just a fad. It will go away.
Sometimes that's what our words suggest,
that we get so excited,
and pretty soon that excitement fades
and you know,
we just go about our own way
of doing things. Our old life.
But if your manner, if your way of life is
totally changed, let that show forth!
When the husband sees it,
he's going to see that, hey this isn't a fad.
This isn't just words. This is reality.
This is something real
in the life of my mate.
So he says your beauty should
not come from outward adornment,
such as braided hair and wearing of gold.
jewelry and fine clothes.
Love this word, "beauty,"
it's an interesting word, the word is cosmo.
When you hear the word cosmos, what
does that come to mind? Bring to mind?
What's that? Space.
Somebody else? Universe.
Somebody else. Anybody else? Stars.
The world! The Universe!
That's what this word is: Cosmos!
It's this world out there
but here its translated as beauty.
So what he's saying is
you've been called out the world,
and you've been placed in a new cosmos.
You were called out of darkness,
placed in the light.
You were called out of a world system,
and placed into a God system.
You were called out of a world that was empty.
The only thing of value was external in nature.
You've been called out of that
and into a world of substance.
Where true beauty comes from within.
So he's saying, let your
outward adornment reflect
the world in which you now live.
No longer a part of that world
You're no longer a part of
that world's system.
You've been called out of it.
Let your husband
who is lost, who has never
obeyed the gospel of Jesus Christ;
never received Jesus as his very life,
see what this new world is all about.
So let your beauty reflect the world
in which you now live.
Makes sense, doesn't it?
Paul said this: You were once darkness
but now you are children of light,
live as children of light.
You have a specific situation
in which you can offer yourself to God
as a living sacrifice
and He can show forth the beauty of His
love and grace within intimate
confines called marriage.
In the world, how does the woman
get the attention of a man?
We know, right?
How does man respond?
to the way of the world?
Just look at history at how men have treated women.
Is it good?
No. No.
Man marginalizes,
objectifies, treats them
as just objects of their pleasure.
That's how men
respond to the ways of the world.
Is there any respect
given from male to female?
in that system? None.
None.
He's saying if you go back and try
to draw the attention of your husband
through worldly means,
you're not going to get the respect
that you deserve.
Therefore, let your beauty;
let the adornment be from within.
An adornment that reflects
this new realm in which you live.
Instead, it should be that of your inner self,
the unfading beauty of
a gentle and quiet spirit
which is of great worth in God's eyes.
Why is that of great worth
in God's sight?
Because it's the very thing
that can catch your husband's attention
in such a way that they will pay attention
to the good news concerning Jesus.
That's what he's talking about.
So, this is the way the holy women of the past
who put their hope in God,
used to make themselves beautiful.
Take a page out of history.
Those who put their hope in God,
see that's the whole deal.
Where's your hope and faith?
In this new realm, in this new
world, in this new life; your hope and faith
are in Christ Jesus,
the one who loves you most.
The one who has called you;
the one who has justified you,
the one who has glorified you;
the one who has committed himself
to you in all things.
Your hope and faith are in Him.
So when he's saying to submit yourself
you know he's doing so,
because he's got something good in mind.
Not that you're going to be
treated like a doormat, not that you,
you know, become this second class citizen.
That's not what he's saying.
Your hope and faith in God
elevates you to a point where
you can be fully human.
The man can see it,
and act accordingly. That's of great worth.
For this is the way the holy women
of the past who put their hope in God,
used to make themselves beautiful,
they were submissive to their own husbands
like Sarah who obeyed Abraham,
and called him master or lord.
you are her daughters if you
do what is right and do not give way to fear.
Every morning, Jeanna wakes up,
I say, "Who am I?"
Master and Lord.
"okay, go about your day"
(chuckles from audience)
Any of y'all believe that?
I don't either. I did look up this
word, "lord" "master" .
It's an interesting word,
it's kurios. Kurios. It's the title
that we give Jesus Christ when we
say he's both Lord and God.
That's the word.
It was the word that the citizens of Rome
would use for the Emperor or Caesar,
he was lord. This was the word they used.
It's also a word that can just be
an honorary title of address.
So when you meet somebody,
Hi, Mr. So-and-so.
It can be used in that way.
So there's various ways that
this particular word is used.
Jeanna does use it,
she will say things like, "Listen, Mr!"
"This is what's going to happen" I mean
it can be used in that context.
It's very appropriate.
But it's simply, here again,
saying, I'm going to to submit.
It's a willing choice.
That's all that this passage is talking about.
You are her daughters if you do
what is right, and do not give
way to fear. You don't let fear
rob you of what God is calling you to.
Again, what's the setting?
What's the purpose?
What's the situation?
You have a husband
that doesn't know the Lord.
Here are some practical things for you to
employ, to implement, to put into practice
in that situation.
Then he gives a verse to husbands,
"Husbands in the same way,
"be considerate as you live with your wives."
So, if you're a husband
and you have a wife that
doesn't know the Lord.
What are you going to do?
Be considerate as you live
with your wives,
and treat them with respect.
My goodness, if you
know the Lord, Man.
Husband.
You should put a woman on a pedestal.
You should treat them with the utmost respect.
Make them believe
that they are the most important,
the most significant on the planet.
That's what the grace of God, this new life
in Christ is going to move you
to do in a marriage situation.
If you try to lord it over your wife,
you try to say,
Hey, I'm the guy!
I'm the one in authority.
I'm in charge,
You have missed the message.
There's so many quote, "christians"
who abuse their wives in the name
of what they believe is
the authority they've been given.
There is no authority given to man
unless it's granted by God.
The only way that's granted in marriage
is if the wive willingly chooses to submit.
If you try to take it, you've missed it.
Why? Because God has called you to love
your wife as Christ loved the church.
Christ, my goodness!
He puts us on a pedestal!
He shed His precious blood,
purchased us
and He says, 'You are my glory!"
That's what Jesus does
with us. His bride.
He honors us. He cherishes us.
Cherishes us.
He put over and above His own.
That's our Lord. That's our savior.
If we, as men and as husbands
don't grasp that, we will miss
a wonderful opportunity we have to
place our wives up on pedestals
and to treat them with honor and respect
and with kindness, and with reverence,
and with submission ourselves.
Says, Treat them with respect
as the weaker partner and heirs
with you of the gracious gift of life.
They're equal! Same gift that God
gave you, he gave to her.
Cherish her. So that nothing will hinder
cut off, or cut off your prayers.
You're trying to lord it over your wife.
You're not praying,
you've cut that out.
Just trying to exert
your power and authority.
But when a women willfully submits,
in a marriage situation, here's what
happens. Here's what happens to me,
when Jeanna says,
"Hey, whatever you think,
"whatever you feel is best,
Man, that's a huge weight.
I can't mess this up.
I can't just chose something
because I think it's good for me.
I've got a wife, I've got kids, I've got
you know, this bigger picture involved.
Man, I better go to the Lord and start
praying. Because I need wisdom.
I'm not the brightest light in the chandelier.
I need the Lord's lights.
I need the Lord's wisdom.
I better start praying.
But if I think I have it all together,
and I'm the big boss, I'm the big cheese,
my way or the highway,
that's going to cut out
your desire to pray.
Men, we've got a huge responsibility
on our shoulders. Let's take every
thing to the Lord. Well, let's pray together.
Dear Heavenly Father,
we thank You so much
that marriage, as You
designed it, is really a reflection
of Christ love for the church.
As men, help us to see that our role
is to cherish our wives.
To encourage our wives.
To support our wives.
To love them, sacrifice
to put them on a pedestal,
where they can truly
flourish as your child.
Thank you for that awesome
responsibility and privilege.
Drive us to our knees
in prayer, lifting up everything to You
in regard to our families,
to our marriages. Wives,
Lord thank you for them.
Thank You for the incredible blessing.
Thank You that You used them
in such a significant way to
shake us out of our fog.
Open up our eyes, so that we can see
the majesty and glory of your love.
Thank You for this and just
awesome privilege
to be a royal priest in Your kingdom
to show forth praises of You,
who called us out of darkness,
and into light.
We thank You for that, in Christ's name,
Amen.