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My name is Valentina.
I am 30.
I come from a Mixtec Indian town.
We have our own traditions, and I like it that way.
I like where I'm from. It's a pretty place.
And hopefully, well, maybe my girls won't speak our language every day,
but they should at least know it.
I came from there [to go to the city] thinking,
"Wow, I'm going to make money
to bring home to my Dad."
I was really happy because the other girls who came back to our town
after working here said,
"Hey, in Mexico City, there's lots of money!"
And I said, "Could that be true?"
I wanted some too, so I said,
"Mom, let me go to Mexico City, I want to bring home lots of money."
Things like that.
But when I got here, I saw that it wasn't true.
When I got pregnant, I kept working.
I worked until the eighth month.
And when my daughter was five years old,
I started seeing my current husband Jose Luis.
He's in the military.
He drinks a little...
He asked me to marry him.
well, every time he drinks it gets a little tricky,
so, well, we are just barely getting along.
I believe we don't understand each other very well.
That's why we decided just to have the second baby,
the one whose biological father he is.
I was breastfeeding Sofia,
and well, we were just using condoms,
and, well, it wasn't...or it broke, or something like that.
and I found myself pregnant another time.
and, it's all just very complicated.
And actually, ever since we got married, I knew,
I should have made the decision to have one more child.
So there were two, and no more.
I made the mistake of not having my tubes tied right away
after Sofia was born.
But anyway, I was just thinking of the two I already had.
To try to give them a better life.
Maybe I can't do much, but I can at least try to
give them better food, to dress them better and take care of them.
After asking her friends and neighbors for help, Valentina tried several homemade methods
to try to induce and abortion.
I got some injections, but nothing happened.
So I went and tried a second time, but hardly anything.
I took two more injections and four pills,
two oral and two vaginal.
But just a teeny drop came out.
And then the tea.
It was a gigantic glass, super hot!
It was terrible.
Nothing happened! Not with the injections, not with the tea.
The massage I got--ooh.
I think it was with a blanket or a sheet, or something like that
They put it here, and picked me up.
It was so painful.
And they told me, "With this, it will come out."
And I said, "okay, if you are sure that this is right."
Like this, first they did it with me lying facing up,
then they picked me up, forcefully, and something gave, I don't know where.
And then again, facing down.
And, again, until it hurt up into my head,
and well, nothing. Nothing.
At the point of despair, an acquaintance told Valendina about a clinic...
I am so happy that I found a place that didn't give me any trouble
and that didn't abuse me.
I got there, and it was so nice that they treated me so well.
I saw the doctor, who said to me, and I remember the exact words:
"Mrs. Valentina, how can we help you?"
And I explained, "Doctor, I have this problem, and I want you to help me. Please."
And that was it. It was all beautiful.
He explained everything in great detail and very well,
and helped me with all of my fears and doubts.
There was even a psychologist there,
who explained to me everything I needed or wanted to know,
and it was also very nice because
they let me explain what I felt, or what I wanted.
People had also told me things that weren’t true and all,
but this place was marvelous because they took care of my doubts.
I could act as I wanted to there.
I am very happy about this. How I hope
that this keeps growing or that there were more places like this.
Because...I'll say it again.
I have my sisters and cousins, one is a single mother
who had to have a baby she didn't want
because she couldn't find a good place.
I feel free. Happy.
To go on with my life.
And guilt? I don’t feel it, because
if I wasn’t sure about what I wanted to do in the first place,
I wouldn’t have done it, just to feel bad later on, or have regrets.
I will do what is for the best.
But no, my decision was made, and now I feel happy.