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My name's Bill.
I am now retired, but I went to Vietnam in 1970, stayed
there '70 through '71.
Was with the 1st Cavalry Division.
I was a field soldier.
I was 11 Bravo.
So we were everywhere.
It was rough.
So you did whatever you had to do to cope with whatever it is
that you need to deal with every day, day in and day out.
Sometimes you would drink too much.
The other thing is I would always smoke way too much.
I used to work 14, 15 hours a day just to keep my mind busy.
And I went 20--
about 25 years doing the same thing over, and over, and over
again, getting fired from this job, getting fired from that
job, letting my temper get the best of me.
And my wife left me.
Things were going downhill fast.
We had gone over the deep edge somewhere and didn't know that
there was anything wrong.
Took a lot of years to finally realize it.
You hear different triggers from different people.
People will tell me, yeah, a helicopter
makes me really scared.
Well, to me, a helicopter meant
they're bringing me something.
They're bringing me food.
They're bringing me ammunition.
They're coming to get me.
It was always good.
Claustrophobia, on the other hand, I still have it.
I was a tunnel rat, to boot.
So I can't take it.
Big, large crowds, I just can't do it.
I'm very conscious of exactly where I am in a room,
what's around me.
I know who's moving, who's not moving.
I know everything that's going on around me.
It was actually my third company that I had opened.
And things had been going pretty good.
And then something really, really terrible happened.
I was really--
I wasn't suicidal.
I was homicidal.
I was really, really upset with some people.
And that was when I finally went down to the Denver Vet
Center and said, I need some help.
First, she started seeing me every week.
And then she got me into a psychiatrist
to get me some meds.
And suddenly, I was able to sleep.
And I was able to think again.
She ended up sending me down to the VA and to the PTSD
clinic, which was a
seven-week, in-hospital program.
And that was like night and day for me.
It just brought my whole world together.
It made me deal with some things that I obviously hadn't
dealt with in 25 years and come out OK.
And knowing that there were so many other guys there that
were the same was the biggest thing that there was, because
now you know you're not the only one.
The big thing is, I'm happy with who I am
now, where I wasn't.
I wasn't happy with who I was.
I believe I'm much calmer now.
I'm just better.
I'm just better.
I feel better, feel good about who I am.