Leslie nielsen

There's an old saying that God exists in your search for him. I just want you to understand that I ain't looking.

Shirley! Don't call me Shirley!

It was a boy's name first.

There were 15 people in the village, including five of us. If my father arrested somebody in the winter, he'd have to wait until the thaw to turn him in.

The violence or the vaudeville style of comedy is a technique all by itself. You get up there, and you are a comedian, and you're doing one thing. That is, you're going to make the audience laugh.

It's not really that I've been an advocate for hearing aids for a long time, it's just that I've been losing my hearing for a long time! So it's actually very important for me because I'm actually...

I have always loved science fiction. One of my favorite shows is 'Star Trek.' I like the trips, where it drops my mind off, because they give you a premise and all of a sudden, you say, 'Oh!' and I'm...

I really have to keep an eye on myself, because sometimes I think I might say something important.

The reason there's a question mark on my front door is just in case I forget my address.

I like that kind of 'straight-faced' comedy. I like to be straight-faced and outrageous.