Andy rooney

Writers don't retire. I will always be a writer.

I'm in a position of feeling secure enough so that I can say what I think is right and if so many people think it's wrong that I get fired, well, I've got enough to eat.

The dullest Olympic sport is curling, whatever 'curling' means.

I hope all of you are going to fill out your census form when it comes in the mail next month. If you don't return the form the area you live in might get less government money and you wouldn't want...

Death is a distant rumor to the young.

As an old reporter, we have a few secrets, and the first thing is we try the phone book.

A writer's job is to tell the truth.

I don't think the government is out to get me or help someone else get me but it wouldn't surprise me if they were out to sell me something or help someone else sell me something. I mean, why else...

My own time is passing fast enough without some national game to help it along.

Taxes are important. President Bush's tax proposals leave no rich person behind. Voters approve of President Bush helping the kind of people they wish they were one of.