Tip:
Highlight text to annotate it
X
HEY!
WHAT ARE YOU DOING DOWN HERE?
I FELL ASLEEP ON THE CHAIR LAST NIGHT.
YOU AND MOM HAD A FIGHT?
WERE YOU BEING EMOTIONALLY DISTANT AGAIN?
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN, ANYWAY?
IT MEANS THAT I'M NOT FASCINATED
BY EVERY LITTLE DETAIL OF YOUR MOTHER'S DAY.
"THAT MUFFIN ONLY HAD 7 CARBS?
WOW!"
THE TRICK IS TO SAY "WOW."
IT'S LIKE A MAGIC LITTLE WORD
THAT MAKES IT SEEM LIKE YOU'RE INTERESTED.
YOU KNOW, IT SEEMS NO MATTER HOW MANY TIMES I DO LAUNDRY,
THE BASKET'S ALWAYS FULL.
WOW!
DID YOU TEACH YOUR SON TO "WOW" ME?
YOU KNOW ABOUT THE "WOW"?
I HAVE FOR 11 YEARS.
WOW.
THAT ONE WAS REAL.
I DIDN'T HEAR YOU COME TO BED LAST NIGHT.
I HAD TO KEEP AN EYE ON CARMEN AND JASON.
I FEEL ASLEEP DOWN HERE.
I KNOW IT'S HARD FOR YOU HAVING JASON LIVE WITH US,
BUT YOU CAN'T SLEEP ON THAT CHAIR
FOR THE NEXT FIVE WEEKS.
LOOK, I DON'T KNOW HOW YOU CAN SLEEP AT ALL,
ANGIE, KNOWING THAT CARMEN'S BOYFRIEND'S IN THE HOUSE.
IT'S FINE. HE'S ON THE COUCH. SHE'S IN HER ROOM.
THAT MEANS THEY'RE ONLY 20 FEET APART.
THINK ABOUT IT, ANGIE.
HE'S OVER 6 FEET TALL.
HE DOES THREE CARTWHEELS, HE'S THERE.
HE STICKS THE LANDING,
WE'RE GRANDPARENTS.
YOU'RE BEING RIDICULOUS.
NOTHING'S GONNA HAPPEN.
YOU'RE DAMN RIGHT NOTHING'S GONNA HAPPEN...
BECAUSE HE'S GOTTA GET PAST ME TO GET TO HER BEDROOM,
AND NOTHING GETS PAST ME -- NOT EVEN A FLY.
WA-POW!
THERE'S NOTHING IN YOUR HAND.
I'M SO FAST, I ALREADY RELEASED IT.
CAN'T JASON JUST USE
THE OTHER STAIRS IN THE LIVING ROOM?
I'D LIKE TO SEE HIM TRY. REMEMBER THAT ELECTRIC SHOCK PAD
WE BOUGHT TO KEEP THE DOG OFF THE COUCH?
IT'S ON THE THIRD STEP.
[ ELECTRICITY CRACKLING ]
Max: OH, CRAP!
DON'T YOU THINK YOU SHOULD HAVE WARNED YOUR SON?
I DID.
YOU SAID IT WAS THE THIRD STEP!
FROM THE BOTTOM!
OH. GOT IT!
MORNING.
NOT SO GOOD.
I KEPT HAVING THIS DREAM THAT SOMEONE WAS
STANDING OVER ME SAYING, "GIVE ME A REASON, VATO."
"VATO" IS CURIOUS. IT'S VERY CURIOUS.
SOUNDS LIKE SOME SORT OF ETHNIC TERM, HUH?
MAN.
OH, DID I MISS BREAKFAST?
I JUST ROLLED OUT OF BED AND CAME DOWN.
JASON,
I FORGOT YOU WERE STAYING HERE.
WHO ARE YOU?
WHERE'S THE DEMON GIRL WE SEE EVERY MORNING
WITH THE EYE BOOGERS AND THE NASTY BREATH?
"NO ONE TALK TO ME TILL I HAVE MY WAFFLE."
I THINK YOU LOOK GREAT, CARMEN.
OH, THANK YOU.
I'VE NEVER SEEN YOU IN THE MORNING.
YOU LOOK SO CUTE WITH BED HEAD.
CUT IT OUT.
NO, I LIKE IT ALL MESSED UP.
YEAH, HOW WOULD YOU LIKE IT ALL MATTED WITH BLOOD, TAMBIEN?
WELL, THEY'RE ALL OVER EACH OTHER.
óRALE, RED SHOES DIARY,
COVER YOURSELF.
LOOK, IF YOU GUYS ARE GONNA LIVE IN THIS HOUSE,
THERE'S GONNA BE SOME RULES.
FIRST OF ALL, YOU'RE BOTH GROUNDED FOR LYING TO US
ABOUT THAT PARTY AT JASON'S HOUSE LAST NIGHT.
SO WE DECIDED FOR THE NEXT TWO WEEKS
THERE'LL BE NO GOING OUT, NO TV, NO PHONE.
TWO WEEKS STUCK IN THE HOUSE TOGETHER?
I GUESS THAT SOUNDS FAIR.
AND WHILE YOU'RE IN THE HOUSE,
THERE'LL BE NO KISSING, NO TOUCHING,
AND UNDERGARMENTS ARE TO BE WORN AT ALL TIMES.
LET ME PUT THIS IN A TERM YOU MAY UNDERSTAND, SCHOOLBOY.
IF I SEE YOUR PARTICIPLE DANGLING,
YOU'RE A DEAD MAN.
STARTING WHEN?
DAD, RELAX, WE'RE NOT GONNA DO ANYTHING.
YEAH. IT'S SO COOL OF YOU TO TAKE ME IN
FOR THE REST OF BASEBALL SEASON.
I MEAN, I WOULD NEVER TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THAT.
THAT'S RIGHT. YOU HAVE NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT.
WE'RE GONNA BE ADULTS ABOUT THIS.
WELL, NOW THAT WE'RE ALL ON THE SAME PAGE,
I NEED TO GET DRESSED, AND YOU NEED TO GET
IN THE SHOWER BEFORE WORK.
WE'LL MAKE YOU GUYS BREAKFAST.
WAIT FOR IT.
NO.
[ WATER RUNNING ]
THE SHOWER HAS STARTED.
NOT YET, NOT YET.
[ WATER STOPS ]
NOW.
[ ELECTRICITY CRACKLING ]
George: AAH!
OY.
JUST LOOKING FOR MY SHAMPOO.
IT'S NOT HERE.
AY. ANGIE!
♪ ALL MY FRIENDS ♪
♪ KNOW THE LOW RIDER ♪
♪ THE LOW RIDER ♪
♪ IS A LITTLE HIGHER ♪
BRING THE HEAT.
IF YOU GOT ANY HEAT.
YOU PROBABLY GOT A BIG OLD NOODLE FOR AN ARM.
AAH!
MAN, THAT WAS 90 MILES AN HOUR.
HEY, ERNIE, THROW IT BACK TO JASON AS HARD AS YOU CAN.
[ GRUNTS ]
WHAT WAS THAT?
HA HA. 22.
THAT THING'S BROKEN, MAN.
YEAH, YOU'RE RIGHT. YOU KNOW, THROW IT AGAIN.
I GET A BETTER MEASUREMENT IF I CAN RUN ALONGSIDE THE BALL.
DAD, THE DODGER GAME IS STARTING.
OH, COME ON, JASON. THE DODGERS ARE PLAYING THE ASTROS.
I WANT YOU TO SEE CLEMENS PITCH.
GROWING UP IN CUBA, I SEEN A LOT OF GOOD BALLPLAYERS.
AND YOU REMIND ME OF RUCHO RODRIGUEZ --
BEST PITCHER I EVER SAW.
AH, HE DREAMED OF COMING TO AMERICA
AND PLAYING FOR THE YANKEES.
NO.
HE TRIED TO SWIM FOR FREEDOM,
BUT HIS RIGHT ARM WAS SO MUCH STRONGER THAN HIS LEFT.
HE ENDED UP DOING CIRCLES AROUND THE ISLAND
UNTIL THEY ARRESTED HIM.
"BIRDS STILL SINGING,
"SUN STILL SHINING.
"THIS DAY SHALL HAVE NO NIGHT.
MY SOUL IS A SMILEY-FACED HELIUM BALLOON."
I THINK IT'S THE BEST POEM I'VE EVER WRITTEN.
WHAT DO YOU THINK, KINSEY?
I THINK IF I RANDOMLY ATE THOSE WORDS
AND PUKED THEM ONTO THE PAGE,
IT'D BE A MUCH BETTER POEM.
YOU DON'T LIKE IT?
CARMEN, YOU'RE ONLY GONNA BE CHEATING YOURSELF
AND EVERYONE ELSE AT THE POETRY CLUB
IF YOU DON'T LOOK WITHIN.
I MEAN, YOU HAVE TO FIND YOUR MOST PERSONAL WOUND
AND RIP THE SCAB OFF.
LET YOUR BLOOD BE YOUR INK.
BUT I'M IN LOVE.
I MEAN, MY BOYFRIEND'S IN THE HOUSE.
THINGS ARE PRETTY GOOD RIGHT NOW.
NO, THEY'RE NOT. YOU'RE MEXICAN!
YOU'RE IN PAIN.
YOUR PEOPLE HAVE BEEN *** AND PILLAGED
BY THE CONQUISTADORES!
I AM SO JEALOUS.
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? SHE WAS BORN IN BURBANK.
SHE'S GOT HER OWN CAR AND A CLOSET FULL OF CLOTHES.
YOU WANNA SEE A MEXICAN SUFFERING,
COME BACK WHEN I HAVE TO PAY HER CELL PHONE BILL.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
WATCHING THE DODGER GAME. SO WHY DON'T YOU GUYS
GO EXPLORE YOUR DARK SOULS IN THE KITCHEN?
YOU SAID WE'RE NOT ALLOWED TO WATCH TV.
THIS IS DIFFERENT. THIS IS FOR JASON'S BASEBALL CAREER.
WELL, WHAT IF THERE WAS SOMETHING ABOUT POETRY ON TV?
WE WATCH SOMETHING ABOUT POETRY ON TV EVERY YEAR.
IT'S CALLED "HOW THE GRINCH STOLE CHRISTMAS."
IT RHYMES.
YEAH, I LIKE THE DOG WITH THE ANTLERS.
I KNOW, IT'S CLASSIC.
WHY DON'T YOU GUYS WRITE SOMETHING LIKE THAT?
COME ON, LET'S GO FINISH THIS IN THE KITCHEN.
YOU KNOW WHAT? I'M KINDA HUNGRY.
NO, NO.
I WANT YOU TO SEE HOW CLEMENS PITCHES AROUND THIS HITTER.
HEY, CARMEN, COULD YOU MAKE US A COUPLE OF SANDWICHES, PLEASE?
WHAT DO YOU WANT ON THEM?
óRALE!
WHAT?
YOU'RE JUST GONNA WAIT ON THEM LIKE THAT?
YOU KNOW THEY'RE ONLY ASKING YOU BECAUSE YOU'RE A GIRL.
THAT IS SO SEXIST.
YOU KNOW, IT'S FUNNY, KINSEY...
I ASKED CARMEN TO DO SOMETHING,
AND, LIKE, SOUND COMES OUT OF YOUR MOUTH.
YOU'RE LIKE, "EEE EEE EEE!"
THAT IS SO SAD.
I MEAN, SO MUCH HEAD, AND SO LITTLE IN IT,
I CAN, LIKE, HEAR IT -- RRR -- RATTLING.
KINSEY'S RIGHT. IT IS SEXIST.
MAKE YOUR OWN SANDWICH. I'VE GOT A POEM TO WRITE.
OH, WAIT, WAIT. I'LL WRITE THE POEM FOR YOU.
"CARMEN, PLEASE, DON'T MAKE ME BEG.
WHAT I'D LIKE IS SOME CHORIZO AND EGG."
YOU KNOW WHAT, MR. LOPEZ?
OUR POEMS DON'T RHYME BECAUSE RHYME SCHEMES
ARE CHAINS OF BONDAGE ON FREE THOUGHT --
CHAINS INVENTED BY MEN.
YOU KNOW, KINSEY, I'M BETTING YOU GOT
A FOREST UNDER THERE, DON'T YOU?
WHAT'S GOING ON?
OH, CARMEN'S MAKING SANDWICHES. YOU WANT ONE?
George: JASON!
HEY, DON'T YOU HAVE TO GET TO THE BATTING CAGES?
OH, YEAH. I BETTER GET GOING.
HEY, HOW COME HE'S GOING IF I'M NOT ALLOWED TO?
WE'RE BOTH GROUNDED. DAD, I'M MISSING MY POETRY SLAM.
I TOLD YOU BEFORE, CARMEN, THIS IS DIFFERENT, OKAY?
THIS IS ABOUT HIS BASEBALL CAREER.
NO, IT'S NOT DIFFERENT. IT'S BECAUSE I'M A GIRL. MOM!
CALL HER AGAIN. THAT DON'T SCARE ME.
MOM!
GO, GO. GO, GO, GO, GO.
MOM, DAD'S LETTING JASON GO TO THE BATTING CAGES,
AND HE WON'T LET ME GO TO MY POETRY SLAM.
WE AGREED THEY WERE BOTH GROUNDED.
LOOK, ANGIE, JASON'S GOT A CHANCE TO GO PRO, OKAY?
HE'S GOT SCOUTS THAT ARE GONNA COME AND SEE HIM.
HIS WHOLE FUTURE DEPENDS ON HOW PREPARED HE IS.
BUT POETRY COULD BE MY FUTURE.
LOOK, CARMEN, POETRY'S NOT A CAREER.
NO ONE EVER GOT A MILLION-DOLLAR SIGNING BONUS
FOR RHYMING "BINGO" AND "NAME-O."
SO, BASEBALL'S MORE IMPORTANT THAN POETRY
JUST BECAUSE YOU CAN MAKE MONEY AT IT?
BINGO! NAME-O!
WELL, POETRY IS MY PASSION,
AND I'M GONNA MAJOR IN IT AT COLLEGE,
SO GET USED TO IT.
COLLEGE, YEAH, RIGHT.
WHAT? I'M GOING TO COLLEGE.
REALLY? SO I GUESS ALL THOSE C's ON YOUR REPORT CARD
STOOD FOR C-C-C-C-COLLEGE.
AND THAT "D" STOOD FOR,
"DAMN, I WAS ALMOST A 'C.'"
DAD, I WAS GOING THROUGH STUFF,
BUT I'M TRYING HARDER NOW.
GEORGE, SHE DID TAKE HER COLLEGE APTITUDE TEST.
THE ONLY REASON SHE TOOK IT, ANGIE,
IS BECAUSE YOU MADE HER. LOOK, CARMEN'S NOT MOTIVATED.
ALL SHE CARES ABOUT IS JASON, HER HAIR, AND HER CLOTHES.
EVEN WHEN YOU HOMESCHOOLED HER, SHE WAS LATE TO CLASS
BECAUSE SHE SAID THERE WAS TRAFFIC ON THE STAIRS.
WAIT A SECOND.
THIS ISN'T ABOUT POETRY
OR ME BEING A GIRL.
THIS IS ABOUT WHAT DAD THINKS OF ME.
CARMEN, YOUR FATHER LOVES YOU,
AND HE WANTS WHAT'S BEST FOR YOU.
DAD,
DO YOU BELIEVE I COULD MAKE IT IN COLLEGE?
WHAT DO YOU THINK I'M SUPPOSED TO DO WITH MY LIFE?
CARMEN, I JUST THINK YOU NEED TO BE REALISTIC.
REALISTIC?
OH, MY GOD, YOU NEVER THOUGHT ABOUT ME GOING TO COLLEGE
BECAUSE YOU DON'T BELIEVE IN ME.
I NEVER THOUGHT ABOUT YOU GOING TO COLLEGE, CARMEN,
'CAUSE YOU NEVER SHOWED ME ANY POTENTIAL.
CARMEN, HE DIDN'T MEAN IT.
HOW COULD YOU?
LOOK, ANGIE, I KNOW WE'RE GONNA HAVE
A BIG FIGHT, ALL RIGHT? BUT LET ME TELL YOU THIS.
I DIDN'T SLEEP VERY GOOD LAST NIGHT,
AND WHAT I COULD USE RIGHT NOW, REALLY, IS A POWER NAP.
'CAUSE IF YOU DEFEAT A TIRED GEORGE,
REALLY, WHAT HAVE YOU WON?
HOW COULD YOU TELL OUR DAUGHTER
SHE DOESN'T HAVE ANY POTENTIAL?
LOOK, CARMEN'S NEVER BEEN A GREAT STUDENT.
SHE'S NEVER COME TO ME AND SAID, "DAD, I WANNA BE
A TEACHER, OR AN ACCOUNTANT, OR A DOCTOR."
SHE'S NEVER PURSUED ANYTHING THAT WASN'T 6'4"
IN TIGHT JEANS THAT MADE HIS BUTT LOOK "SO HOT."
WELL, SHE'S PURSUING POETRY NOW.
AND IF THAT'S GOT HER EXCITED ABOUT COLLEGE,
THEN WE SHOULD SUPPORT HER.
COME ON, ANGIE, CARMEN'S NOT COLLEGE MATERIAL.
SHE NEEDS TO WAKE UP AND SMELL THE COFFEE...
THEN PROBABLY POUR IT FOR A TRUCKER
AND TELL HIM ABOUT THE SPECIALS.
[ SCOFFS ]
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
OH, SEE, I AM TAKING MY LOSING LOTTO SCRATCHERS,
PAINTING OVER THEM WITH THIS SILVER NAIL POLISH,
AND THEN I'M SELLING 'EM TO THE NEIGHBORHOOD KIDS.
I TOOK A LOSE-LOSE, TURNED IT INTO A WIN-WIN.
THEN YOU CAN GO TO HELL-HELL.
WHY DON'T YOU WORRY ABOUT YOUR OWN PROBLEMS?
WHAT'S THE PRINCESS MAD ABOUT THIS TIME?
FORGET TO PUT THE SEAT DOWN,
AND SHE DUNKED HER DOUGHNUT?
NO, WE'RE ARGUING ABOUT CARMEN GOING TO COLLEGE.
OH, COLLEGE.
THAT'S JUST A PLACE TO GET DRUNK AND SLEEP WITH STRANGERS.
SO YOUR BEDROOM'S A UNIVERSITY, HUH?
WHAT'S THE NAME OF IT, U.C. OLD LAY?
HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT? ALL I'M SAYING, GEORGE,
IS RICH PEOPLE ARE THE ONLY ONES
WHO CAN AFFORD TO GO TO COLLEGE
AND SCREW AROUND FOR FOUR YEARS.
PEOPLE LIKE US HAVE TO WORK.
THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN TRYING TO TELL HER,
BUT SHE'S 16, SHE DON'T GET IT YET.
OH, WELL, NEITHER DID YOU WHEN YOU WERE HER AGE.
YOU HAD THIS STUPID DREAM OF BEING A ROCK STAR.
I HAD A SHOT.
YOU KNEW THREE CHORDS,
AND YOUR VOICE SOUNDED LIKE A CAT
WITH ITS HUEVOS IN A VISE.
IT ONLY SOUNDED LIKE THAT ON THAT ONE SONG, "MEXI-CAT."
♪ PUT YOUR TAIL IN THE AIR, I'LL BE RIGHT THERE ♪
I THINK WE BOTH KNEW
YOU WERE GONNA END UP AT THE FACTORY.
WELL, I DIDN'T KNOW I WAS GONNA END UP IN THE FACTORY.
I COULD HAVE GOT OTHER JOBS.
WHAT ABOUT THAT TIME I WAS GONNA GO TO THAT PLACE
BUT I DIDN'T GO 'CAUSE I DIDN'T THINK
THE GUY WAS GONNA BE THERE?
COME ON, YOU COULD BARELY READ.
YOU WALKED OUT OF "STAR WARS" --
THERE WERE TOO MANY WORDS AT THE BEGINNING.
"MOMMY, MOMMY, YOU FOOLED ME.
THAT WAS A MOVING BOOK."
YOU SEE?
THAT'S THE KIND OF STUFF YOU DID TO ME WHEN I WAS A KID.
YOU ALWAYS MADE FUN OF ME. YOU NEVER ENCOURAGED ME.
GEORGE, WHAT WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO?
YOU WEREN'T A GOOD STUDENT.
I MEAN, YOU NEVER CAME TO ME AND SAID,
"MOMMY, I WANNA BE A ***,"
OR "I WANNA RUN A LIQUOR STORE."
YOU KNOW, SOMETHING THAT SHOWED ME
YOU WERE SERIOUS ABOUT YOUR FUTURE.
THAT'S BECAUSE YOU NEVER PUSHED ME,
SO I NEVER REACHED MY...
[ SIGHS ]
POTENTIAL.
THAT'S RIGHT, GEORGE. BIG WORD, SOUND IT OUT.
I NEVER PUSHED CARMEN.
OH, NOW, SEE, YOU JUST CAN'T WIN.
GEORGE, IF YOU PUSH KIDS AND IT DOESN'T GO WELL,
THEN IT'S YOUR FAULT.
AND IF THEY SUCCEED...
I DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT'S LIKE.
HEY, CARMEN DOESN'T HAVE TO BE SMART.
MAYBE SHE'S LUCKY.
WHY DON'T YOU BUY 10 SCRATCHERS AND SEE?
I KILLED THE INDIANS.
I BOUGHT THE SLAVES.
I FORCED THE CHINESE TO BUILD MY RAILROAD.
CHUGGA CHUGGA.
ALL ABOARD!
FOR OPPRESSION.
WELCOME TO MY WHITE AMERICA.
I'LL HAVE A DIET SODA
WITH MY HOT APPLE LIE.
I'M KINSEY. YOU GUYS WERE AWESOME.
GOD, I HOPE THEY LIKE MY POEMS.
THESE PEOPLE ARE AMAZING.
HONEY, YOU'LL BE FINE. THEY ALL SUCK.
MOM!
WHAT? THEY'RE JUST ANGRY AT EVERYTHING.
OH.
I-I'M SORRY YOU FEEL DISCRIMINATED AGAINST
BY CORPORATE SOCIETY,
BUT YOU CAN'T BE A TELLER IN A BANK
WITH A DOOR KNOCKER IN YOUR NOSE.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
I CAME TO TALK TO CARMEN.
LOOK, IT WAS WRONG FOR ME TO SAY THAT YOU HAVE NO POTENTIAL,
EVEN THOUGH YOU HAVEN'T WORKED HARD AT SCHOOL
OR IMPRESSED ME IN ANY WAY.
IS HE TRYING TO APOLOGIZE?
IT'S TOO SOON TO TELL. IT COULD GO EITHER WAY.
AND PART OF THAT IS MY FAULT
BECAUSE I DIDN'T PUSH YOU ENOUGH, OKAY?
I DIDN'T HAVE EXPECTATIONS FOR YOU.
BUT THAT'S OVER NOW. YOU'RE GONNA MAKE
SOMETHING OF YOUR LIFE, AND I'M GONNA SEE TO IT.
I'MA BE LIKE A DRILL SERGEANT, AND YOU'LL BE LIKE,
"DADDY, I CAN'T STUDY ANYMORE. I'M SO TIRED."
I'M GON' BE LIKE, "YOUR DADDY ISN'T HERE!
NOW DROP AND GIVE ME 20 PAGES, MAGGOT!"
IT'S AN APOLOGY, HONEY.
AND TO SHOW YOU THAT I'M SERIOUS,
I EVEN STARTED A COLLEGE FUND FOR YOU.
ALL THOSE JOKES ABOUT ME NOT HAVING A COLLEGE FUND WERE TRUE?
NO, YOU ALWAYS HAD A COLLEGE FUND,
IT JUST DIDN'T ALWAYS HAVE MONEY IN IT.
WE SPENT MONEY ON OTHER THINGS, LIKE THE HOUSE, AND THE CARS,
AND THAT INSURANCE YOUR MOM MADE ME BUY
'CAUSE THAT CRAZY DUCK ON TV TOLD HER TO.
QUACK QUACK.
I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW
THAT I WAS SO MAD AT YOU AFTER WHAT YOU SAID,
THAT I FINALLY PICKED UP MY COLLEGE TEST SCORES.
WELL, BEING BELOW AVERAGE ISN'T GOOD ENOUGH ANYMORE, CARMEN.
SO WE'RE GONNA GET YOU A TUTOR,
AND WE'RE GONNA GET THOSE SCORES UP, MAGGOT.
ACTUALLY, DAD, I PLACED IN THE TOP 20th PERCENTILE.
GET OUT.
CARMEN, THAT'S WONDERFUL.
YEAH, I MEAN, NOW I CAN GO TO A GOOD COLLEGE.
MAYBE EVEN THE IVY LEAGUE.
IVY LEAGUE. THAT WOULD BE SOMETHING.
YOU KNOW, CARMEN, THERE'S ONLY $300 IN HERE.
THAT WAS THE LIMIT ON MY ATM.
OKAY, UP NEXT, THIS POET IS DOING
HER VERY FIRST SLAM.
PLEASE WELCOME CARMEN CONSUELA LOPEZ.
I REALIZED I DON'T REALLY WANNA DO THIS POEM ANYMORE.
LET'S JUST GO HOME.
NO, NO, NO, NO. SEE, YOUR OLD DAD WOULD SAY
"YOU'RE RIGHT. LET'S GET THE HELL OUTTA HERE,"
BUT NOW THAT I'M ALL BEHIND YOU, GO UP AND DO YOUR THING, GIRL.
OKAY, BUT, UM, JUST SO YOU KNOW,
I WROTE THIS WHEN I WAS IN A KIND OF DARK PLACE.
DON'T MAKE ANY EXCUSES. GO, CARMEN CONSUELA LOPEZ.
"MY DADDY."
DADDY DREAM KILLER.
DADDY LIFE STEALER.
DADDY SOUL CRUSHER...
LOOKS LIKE MAMA DIDN'T MAKE THE CUT ON SHOW NIGHT, HUH?