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During a scientific demonstration
the young Peter Parker got bit by a radioactive spider
acquiring it’s powers proportionally.
That very spider lost all it’s arachnid skills
receiving those of a human being in return.
But what has happened of that spider?
My name is Pietro and I’m the spider who bit Peter Parker
From that day my life has changed,
I can no longer crawl on walls
shoot spider-webs "go web, go!"
or be eaten after sex.
Instead, I realized I had acquired some new extraordinary powers:
those of a human being!
I could finally play video-games and watch *** on youtube.
The doors of art, literature and philosophy opened before me.
But, above all, those of Latin-american telenovelas.
“Armando!”
“Yes, Diego...?”
"It was me..."
"..Who finished the toilet paper."
I live in a mini-apartment with my Irish Setter and my friend Aldo
a cardboard cutout I met in a cinema.
Aldo helps me run the house:
he cooks and takes the dog out for a walk.
Learning to handle my human powers wasn’t easy,
but fortunately all I need is within hand reach.
“Thank you for watching"
"And from tomorrow, don’t miss our new reality show”
"Big ***!"
“What a big ***!”
Goodnight Aldo!