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Ever wondered why we donít all see the same thing ?
Even though thereís only one world?
But everyone sees something different
as if each had his own world
Hadrienís world is different from ours
Hadrien, he is 15. Heís my big Brother
To me, heís Big Foot
Here, Iím with him, 4 years ago
Here, itís him. He had no pimples then
Here, heís with Mum and they had just discovered his problem
Hadrien, when he was little, we didnít know exactly what he was seeing
He wasnít looking at the same things we did
Hadrien, when he was little, he was standing awkwardly and wouldnít look you in the eye
Here, he must have been really young
I donít think I was born yet
And here, he isnít looking much at the video camera
Well, there heís looking at us but itís because of the reflection
It was an old video camera. Heís looking but not really
Also, he used to look at what moved, whatís bright
And sometimes, what was making noise
Here, I think we were on a walk
I donít really know where,
but I probably wasnít born
You can see he wasnít walking too straight,
he often tumbled, and he wasnít very coordinated, then at least
Here heís trying to catch his shadow, but
he doesnít understand that itís his shadow and he canít grab it
Here Hadrien is on a merry-go-round
It must have been in 2003
He is on the little fawn, dressed in red
Look, all the other kids, they move, theyíre having fun,
but he doesnít do anything, he is touching the doe
The others are having fun, they move around
My parents saw he was different from the others,
that something was wrong
He wasnít reacting like the others
He often screamed
He was throwing tantrums and we didnít know why
The doctors said that Hadrien was deaf
So they gave him a hearing aid
Since they realised it wasnít helping,
they wanted to put electronic hearing aids into his skull
These are called implants
Luckily, before the operation a specialist saw that he wasnít deaf,
that it was something else
So my parents saw heaps of doctors and specialists
At last, they got an answer:
Your child suffers from PDD,
... Pervasive Developmental Disorder
and, from what we can see, autism
Hadrien is autistic
Autism is a disorder of neural development characterized by impaired social interaction and communication, and by restricted and repetitive behavior.
For my parents, this didnít make much sense
They knew nothing on this topic
At that point, they knew our lives would be different,
that it wouldnít be easy to bring Hadrien into our world
Autism is something that we donít know too well
We know you can never recover
Itís a handicap
My parents told me that autistic people are not wired the same as us
Hadrien and I donít share the same sensations
when we touch, smell or see
His time isnít like ours
Hadrien can stay hours touching his tile,
or a shell
He has heaps of shells, a collection
My parents say that autistic people often have inadequate behaviour
Hadrien does things that are called
STE-RE-O-TY-PIES
He looks at his wrist
or he makes noises and repeat gestures all the time,
but we donít know why
All of this makes him different!
I have friends who say he is an idiot or heís crazy
but thatís not it!
Itís hard to explain to them
and sometimes I feel ashamed and itís too hard
Hadrien is learning to be like us. People think he has no emotions,
But in fact, all this has to be learned
Sometimes itís funny, he doesnít always understand the meaning of certain phrasesÖ
likeÖ the cat got your tongue
Ö itís raining cats and dogs
or itís like watching the grass grow
What interests him is looking at things
like skin
as if, for him, details are more important.
Hadrien makes a lot of effort to come into our world.
Iíve got to say he has a lot of help
between the teacher aids, the speech therapist, the doctors
the teachersÖ he is looked after fulltime.
My parents say itís thanks to this that he makes progress
Before, Hadrien didnít speak
He couldnít read or write
He still has trouble writing
He is in a class for students with learning difficulties in High School.
Before, he couldnít behave during a meal, stay still, listen, learn
Everyday, he threw tantrums to go to school.
Ma mother used to cry about it.
Itís finished now but it took time
Now, heís able to concentrate, listen or answer questions.
He can even share stories
But we know there are things he will never do.
During school breaks, he goes to the holiday centre with normal kids
where he learns to help the caretakers.
Actually, itís really important for him to be with others
to do the same as others
Sometimes he copies me, and itís annoying!
He also goes swimming twice a week with a special needs class.
He enjoys being in the water
and especially putting his head underwater.
He loves it!
and heís good at it!
Before, we couldnít do stuff together
Now itís different. We can even play together!
Tiler.
What do you like in life?
Why do you enjoy letting water run?
To listen to it.
Why do you enjoy letting water run?
Is it the sound?
Yes.
Will you get married when youíre older?
Yes.
With someone I love.
You donít know who this is yet?
What is it like being autistic?
It means that Iím different
What do you feel?
A handicapped person.
What do you feel? I didnít ask what you were ?
I feel like Iëm handicapped.
And what does it mean ?
it means that Iím different, that Iím not like the others.
And how do you feel about it?
Why donít you answer sometimes?
Because I donít hear very well
Why do you do that?
Because I like doing that.
Does it make you feel better?
Do you feel lesser than others?
Itís like Iím trapped in my bubble by myself.
How do you feel in your bubble? Good or bad?
I feel bad.
I get bored.
Why donít you ask me to play with you when you get bored in your bubble?
Because I donít feel like it.
We know that a part of what he says is learnt
Another part is to make us happy, another part is what he thinks
But itís difficult to sortÖ
Sometimes when we talk about what will happen to Hadrien, with my parents
When theyíre gone
They turn away and their voices change
One day heíll have to find a job
But it wonít be a job like everyone else
Heíll have to have help
Either way, he will always have problems in our world
Anyway, what I do know is that Big Foot will always be my brother
This world is also his.
The prevalence of pervasive developmental disorder is around 11 per 1,000 children in 2008 in USA.