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Tickets this way
for the Chatsworth Express!
Come and watch pikeys
making a mess of the lives
they were given by 'im upstairs.
And kids they're
convinced aren't actually theirs.
Stay away!
What sounds on earth
could ever replace
kids needing money
or wives in your face?
Cos' this, people reckon,
and me included,
is why pubs and drugs
were kindly invented.
To calm us all down,
to stop us going mental.
These are Chatsworth Estate's
basic essentials.
We are worth every penny
for grinding your axes.
You *** on our heads
but you pay the taxes.
Imagine a Britain
without Chatsworth buccaneers,
who'd come on your face
for the price of a beer.
Make poverty history!
Cheaper drugs now!
Make poverty history!
Cheaper drugs now!
Discussion groups, chat lines,
support networks.
The new millennium, the age of the
all-vocalising, all-emoting ***-up.
Normal men and women spewing the
contents of their troubled souls
into the ears of the uninterested,
excreting the sorry waste of their
emotional innards
into all manner of public places.
Pubs, telly, newspapers.
If only they'd zip it and heed their
inner voice, the one that never lies.
The one that screams at
you at the dead of night.
Oh, aye.
'Tis better to remain silent and
be thought a repressed old fart than
open one's mouth and be discovered
a babblin', self-obsessed fool.
Where his family's concerned,
Paddy Maguire's never been
less than generous.
But a 50 grand blow
would knock any man.
Mam.
Settlement.
She set the business up with me,
so it's only fair
she should get half the spoils.
But memories of our time together aren't
going to keep me comfy in my old age.
I need to make serious hay now.
There's
a recession on, so people are what?
Skint.
So they borrow money.
Then what?
So they borrow money.
Then what?
Can't pay it back.
And when these desperados want to forget what monumental
***-ups their lives have become, they do what?
Get off their heads.
Get off their heads.
Drug sales soar.
Economic gloom equals a pay-day boom!
And I want you in on it.
I want Manchester to know
that Maguire & Sons
are back in business.
Not for me, Dad.
Not for
Count me in.
Count me in.
Hang on, what do you mean?
We could make a killing!
What are you on about?
I've got a family.
Good of you to remember.
I've got Karen and
Connor to think of now!
I've got Karen and Connor to think of
now! You're barely scraping a living!
At least I'm not watching me back
all the ***' time.
At least I'm not watching me back all the
***' time.
And what about you?I'm in, Dad.
You still in possession of the
*** you were born with?
You still in possession of the *** you
were born with? Dad, I'm OK with moody weddings.
Oh, you're settling for OK?
I'm in.
Never thought I'd see the day.
Sons of mine, gutless, ***-whipped.
There's more loyalty in those little
rats I pay to sell the gear
on the estate.
Look, Dad
Look, Dad
Get out, all of you.
Look, Dad Get out, all
of you.
I wouldn't mind
Go on, out!
*** off!
You did say no?
Course I said no.
You sound like you're sorry for him.
I am his son.
Yeah, and he's yours.
Oh, what?
"Wooh! I'm going to be the best
dressed baby in Chatsworth! Yay!"
Christ, Karen, a 150 quid?
For him to puke all over it?
Get it back, get a refund.
Hello?
I'd like to place an order, please.
Christ, Carl! Watch where you're
putting it! That was trap two!
I was the only one
willing to go along with Dad.
He totally blanked me.
That's cos you're an ideas person,
like him.
A thinker, cerebral.
More brains than a
service station pastie.
Now, eh, those balloons aren't going
to blow themselves up, are they?
I mean, I'm an inspired ***, me.
But bum sex?
Why would he want to do that?
You should ask him how he'd like it.
Mm!
About Sunday.
We're welcoming
our little man into God's family.
It's a celebration, yes,
but it's a holy day.
So any talk of ***
or crack pipes is right off.
Yeah?
I'll see you later.
See you later, Max.
I think
I can manage that for you, Mimi.
Oh, and if you think I'm cocking up
on me godmum duties,
I'm sure you won't
hesitate to pull me.
Oh, there's nothing to worry about
there.
Because Concepta, my cousin,
she's godmum now.
What?
With the dancing and touring,poor
love never got chance to havekids.
So I thought it'd
be nice for her to have
a little one she can be close to.
You don't begrudge her
having a godson, do you?
Heard the latest from your mother?
Me and you
have been dumped as godparents,
cos her cousin and her bloke
are a more glamorous option.
No, it's just you who's been dumped.
Concepta ain't got a bloke.
You're still godfather?
She only
Uh, she only told me this morning.
And what was your reaction when
mummy dearest hit you with that one?
And what was your reaction when mummy dearest
hit you with that one? I'm I'm not arsed, Kel.
Your girlfriend gets shat on
from a great height by your mother
and you're not arsed?
That's not what I meant! Kel!
(HIGH-PITCHED VOICE) Oops-a-daisy.
Really looking forward to Sunday.
Be nice to have all the
family under one roof again.
I think it's time we settled up.
For the christening? Come on, 50-50.
Paddy, honest, I'm really flush.
Paddy, honest, I'm really flush.
Mimi,
chuck yourself under the King's horse,
gaze at your chuff in a mirror,
but please,
in the spirit of equality,
tell me what I owe.
OK, you win.
500.
You only do it once, don't you?
I'll fetch it for you right away.
Dad?
Why don't you just help him collect?
God knows,
you could do with the readies.
God knows, you could do with
the readies.
I've told you why.
Well, if not to boost your income,
then to keep an eye out for him.
You know better than anyone
what it's like out there.
You know better than anyone what it's like out
there.
Dad's covered.
Got some lads helping him out.
Has he ***! What's he
going to pay them with, Jamie?
There's more brass on a string
quartet than on your dad just now.
Think about it.
No!
Now can we just leave it, please?
I'll be expecting two grand back.
Anything you make on top is yours.
Problem?
How are we supposed to make owt
on that?Get creative.
So, besides hiking up the costs
or mixing the gear, have you got
any other creative suggestions?
People ain't thick.
They know what
they want and how much it costs.
All right, all right.
Make it quick
if you value your kneecaps.
We've been over this.
He's wearing that one.
We've been over this.
He's wearing that one.
Cos you've got to keep your mother sweet.
She's paying for everything because you
managed to spend every penny I put aside.
For when he starts on solids.
It's the business.
Anyway,
you can take that look off your
face cos I know what you're thinking.
"It's all about Connor now.
"
Better to spend 200 on something and wear it
Jamie, it's not every
day your first born's
Karen? Karen?!
What is it, what's wrong?
What is it, what's wrong?
What's going on?
Karen!
What is it?
What are you looking for?
Karen.
What's going on?
The baby.
Where is he?
When's the last time
you had him, Karen?!
Mum, get upstairs! Check, quick!
Connor
Shane, Mickey! Connor's missing!
I'll check the shops,
check the bus stop, tell
everyone you see he's missing!
Get Carl, Ian, ***' everyone!
Find him, Mickey!
Aw, come on!
Carl I need your
I need your help when you've
finished.
You stupid
Leave the girl alone!
How the *** do you forget
where you leave your own son?!
Do you think she really
needs telling, Jamie?!
BABY GURGLES
Oh, thank God!
Oh, Joe, thank ***!
Said she'd only be five minutes.
Asked me to take him while
she popped into Yvonne's.
Everyone was smoking in there.
My mobile goes, I'm yapping away,
I turn around and she's gone.
I forgot
I forgot.
Be the excitement of
the christening and that.
Ah, cheers, Joe.
Drink?
No, I'm driving.
Thanks anyway.
Later, yeah?
Delivery, mate.
I'm sorry.
I'm just off to pick up t'cake.
Running errands for the *** that's coming
between us.
What sort of servile cretin are you?
I'd like you to watch your mouth.
And I'd
like you to keep your nose out of our business.
She's not coming between us.
She is.
And she's doing it
by running me down.
And you're no innocent bystander.
You're her ***' accomplice!
He's running a family errand.
To fetch a cake for a baptism that
I should have been godmother at.
She didn't mean anything personal.
It's easy for you to say.
You're
not the one who's been shafted.
Do you want me to tell her
I can't be godfather no more?
Do you want me to tell her I can't be godfather
no more? I want you to fight my corner!
You've no idea, have you? The effect
this had on me, how touched I was,
how it made me feel that Karen and Jamie thought
that I was good enough to be godmother to their son.
I was walking on air!
And I wanted to do it right,
do Connor proud.
Not just turn up, hold the kid by the
like every other godparent
I have ever come across!
OK, you want it sorted?
I'll sort it.
I didn't do it to hurt Kelly, son.
I did it to protect her.
She probably can't bless herself
right, never mind reel off the Creed.
I don't think I can any more.
More the need for Concepta, then.
She's blood.
She'll always be around.
I hate to say this, but what if Kelly
traps off with some loaded punter?
Any one of us could *** off
at any time.
You and Dad split up.
Yeah.
But we've got responsibilities
that bind us forever more.
Apart from the dollop of ***
and love, you two have nothin'.
Apart from the dollop of *** and love, you two
have nothin'.
What are you getting out of this?
You've got loads of godkids you never
even see, so you know it's a load of ***.
Your beloved
write those lines, did she?
I've had enough of you and my dad trying to
run my life, trying to *** things up for me.
I'm not your little boy any more.
And I'm telling you right now,
back off.
You OK now?
Embarrassed, more than anything.
I'm sorry.
Yeah, so am I.
My head's done in, with everything.
Hey, just think.
After the christening,
it's all over.
No need to thank me.
***.
Right, before I do, there's something
I'd like to get off me chest.
Jamie, mate!
Let's let Jamie in
on our little secret.
Oh, cheer up, Karen.
Confession's good for the soul.
He'll kill you.
I'm ready for him this time.
He won't believe you.
He won't believe you.
Oh, so he hasn't noticed the mole
between your *** or the birthmark on your left *** cheek?
Or the way you dig your nails into
the back of his neck when you come?
Something you should know.
Your mam's invited me to Sunday's do.
I've heard the delivery nurse is always at Maguire
christenings.
Just checking that's cool with you.
Yeah, well you've been there twice for
the little fella.
How could I say no?
See you later.
Yeah.
What's that?
This is Back-Door Bertie.
Our mutual *** buddy.
Yeah, right.
Well, he can *** off.
I thought you wanted to indulge
in a little dark star penetration?
I do, but But that? There's no
pleasure for you sticking that in me.
Well, maybe not,
but you might love it.
An' I'm all about giving, me.
Imagine, the pair of us casting
off our *** innocence together.
What could be more romantic
and binding?
I promise I'll be gentle, Carl.
You're certainly in the minority.
Bet hardly any straight blokes
take it.
I dunno.
What's the difference
between a straight man and a gay man?
Six cans of lager.
I'm not taking, I'm just
Considering possibilities.
If you're thinking it,
you're halfway there.
Yeah, well, me and Max are tight.
And what's good for the goose
What advice would you give
your little brother, Ian?
Absolutely ***' none.
I'm not talking bum sex with him!
Be different
if it was *** though.
I tell you what, once you've made contact with Mr G
spot, you'll kill yourself for not hooking up sooner.
Don't it hurt, though?
Well, you can't do the full monty
straight off.
You've got to work up to it.
You've got to work up to it.
How?
Well, start small
and plenty of lube.
Lubrication.
Bit of spit always does it for me
if I'm ever caught short.
Just let your mind open up to the
possibilities and your ***'ll follow.
And you're a Catholic, yeah,
like me?
So the guilt'll just add to
the sheer thrill of it all.
So, to recap,
you start small, work your way up.
(BARKS)
I *** hate dogs.
Little
disease-spreading *** machines!
Karen.
You look tired.
Come on.
Living over a pub's hardly peaceful.
And I know Mimi's decibel level
isn't always within legal limits.
Here.
My place.
It can be your little oasis.
I want to help, Karen.
Let's face it,
I'm the nearest thing you've got to a dad and
you're the nearest thing I've got to a daughter now.
***!
If that's my consolation prize,
you can stick it up your ***.
I tried my best, Kel.
Just seems like she's not having it.
She say why?
Yeah, the religion thing.
You know and I know, the reason she gave me
the elbow is cos she can't stand a low-down.
Me, being in the limelight.
Don't think you've got
any fears there, Kelly.
In the New Testament,
Matthew never condemns prostitution.
Turning to the Old Testament,
in the book of Hosea, God says
he'd never punish the daughters
of Israel for selling themselves.
And besides, you're a masseuse.
How could ya? If you didn't want him
wearing it, you could've just said.
What's going on?
Look what she did!
Her, who I've treated
like me own daughter.
I ironed it.
Sorry, I didn't even notice.
You didn't want Connor wearing it and
thought if you ruined it, he wouldn't have to!
Mimi, I can assure you, I would
never do something like that.
This was my grandmother's,
an' her mother before that.
The names of my dead babies
are woven into it.
It was an accident.
DOOR SLAMS
You don't believe me now? What sort
of a mad *** do you think I am?
I'm beginning to wonder.
Right.
I'll sort it.
I'll *** sort it!
I will sort it!
RIPS
The mark's do-able, but the tear
But with it being crocheted,
we should be able to hide it nicely.
Brilliant.
Problem is, this is Irish crochet
and I only do the filet.
But my sister-in-law Mary
is good at the Irish, mind.
But the silk thread
don't come cheap.
KNOCK ON DOOR
***!
Get me out of here!
Get me out of here!
In there.
Just a minute.
>
Hi, Mimi.
Come in.
What can I do for you, love?
Well, I'm not here to have me ***
flicked.
Need a word with Kelly.
Oh, she's tied up just now.
I've had a word with Paddy and Shane
and they had a thing or two to say.
And I've decided to rethink
the whole godmother thing.
Concepta's sound but, on balance,
I feel your case is stronger.
What?
You're more grounded.
Even when she isn't
high, her head's still in the clouds.
And you only live round the corner.
If a crisis strikes, what good's she
propping up the Waldorf bar?
An' despite having more male customers than
Burton's, I feel your heart's in the right place.
You'll do for me.
Deal?
Deal.
See ya.
Get out.
What sort of a welcome's that, eh?
She once told me that her
.
.
that her big dream was to go
skinny-dipping at night in Crete.
I kept her messages on me mobile
so I can hear her voice.
(SOBS)
If there's yellow stuff in it,
it's not cancer.
I put sweet corn in that pasta dish.
I were trying out some brown-eye
action with a party blower.
But when I took it out,
the nozzle got stuck.
I can't get it out.
Will you try?
Ooooh! Sorry, Carl, *** extractions didn't
feature on my auxiliary training course.
You don't need a qualification
to work out what's got to be done!
No, but you do need equipment.
Didn't fancy wasting me
whole Friday night in A&E,
Whoa, we're not going there!
They won't bat an eyelid.
Had a vicar in
last week, he had a 12-inch candle up him.
Said he fell backwards putting
up curtains! You're nowt special.
Said he fell backwards putting up curtains!
You're nowt special.
I'm not going, Max.
PARTY BLOWER SQUEAKS
What was that?
Any bit of wind an' it goes off.
It's like having
an internal mouth organ.
Hey, Carl,
give us a tune before you go.
How much was lifted?
OK, OK.
I'll be right with you.
Just what I *** need!
FRONT DOOR CLOSES
I love you.
Don't *** up!
I won't.
Who the *** am I?
Who thefuckam I?
Mr Maguire, Mr Maguire!
So why are you treating me like
Bill Gates or bloody Carnegie?
You're a charity case all right,
but not one I'm supporting.
So, where the ***'s my money?
As it's small, a little
irrigation'll budge it.
As me vac's being serviced anyway.
Are you sure you know
what you're doing?
Every other day
I do a *** removal.
I dislodge, I ***, I dab some
talc, and I return it to its wife.
Come on, Carl.
Drop 'em.
Ready?
SQUELCH
Do I look stupid?
He's out getting the rest now.
There are some people in this world
who learn their lessons well,
take on board advice, move on
and have relatively happy lives.
And there are those that don't.
You are obviously of the latter.
*** you!
You don't scare me!
I know people.
And once you're out of intensive
care, you go see those people and
ask them if they know Paddy Maguire!
I guarantee they will.
You've got
GUNSHO
How's my favourite bum boy?
Last time I was slipping your
Chrissy one, she said he was fine.
Paddy through there?
No, I'll give him a bell.
Been ringing him for ages,
just keeps ringing out.
Yeah.
Two minutes, yeah?
Cheers, son.
Is me dad here?
Nipped out for the papers.
On a Saturday morning there's nothing that Mr
Maguire and I like more than to talk current affairs
over a pot of Lady Grey.
Really?
Is he *** here.
Sean's here with the
delivery and Dad's not in.
You got three grand in the safe?
Do I look like a man who's
got three grand in the safe?
You can set your watch by Sean.
Every Saturday at 12.
Dad never misses him.
There's definitely something up.
Pint of the darkstuff please,
Jamie.
Three grand, me tips.
Karen all right?
Not every day you forget
where your kid is, eh?
You weren't laughing the other day.
Nah,she's fine.
And that is on the house.
Good, so long as
the baby blues haven't struck.
She's just tired, that's all.
We both are.
Having a baby in the house
really takes it out of you.
Mate of mine said that him and his missus
are that knackered at the end of the day,
all they're fit for in bed is sleep.
Your love life's out the window,
you're skint all the time,
strain was unbelievable.
Hey, but listen, he didn't have
what you and Karen have got,
d'you know what I mean, mate?Jamie?
Yes, mate.
Here's the rascal.
You wanna keep it?
Pass.
Should have it framed.
Once
it's been disinfected, obviously.
Health freaks would pay hundreds
for this treatment.
If you know any, tell
them I'll do it cheaper.
Cheers, Lillian.
It was all my pleasure.
I underestimated you.
How?
Never thought for a second you'd ever
really consider being my bum chum.
So, how can I make it up to you?
You can have anything you like.
(FARTS)
(KNOCKS)
You OK?
We'll have to make a bit of
"us" time, won't we?
We're more than just Mum and Dad.
Let's have a night out, eh?
Too much effort.
By the time we've booked a table,
and found a sitter, done the feeds,
got his clothes sorted for
the next day, got meself sorted,
all I'm fit for is bed.
Things'll get better, yeah?
I'm sorry.
I'm not complaining.
You and Connor are my world now.
If anything happened,
if anything damaged us,
I don't know what I'd do.
Hey, nothing is gonna damage us.
All right?
Dad, it's Micky.
Give us a bell, yeah?
Peace offering.
You know where the bar is.
I knew you said you'd sort it,
but I didn't fancy your odds.
You know what, you lot probably
mock those South Sea islanders,
with bones through their noses,
performing their shaman rituals.
When, in fact, you are partaking
in exactly the same ***.
About tomorrow, Frank,
a verbal invite, do ya?
Be nice to see you there
for Katie's sake.
Free bar.
Oh, thanks Mimi, love, yeah
I'll try and show me face.
But what I was about to say, is,
that common myths bind us.
Have either of you seen dad?
Am I some kind of babysitter now?
He's
big boy, he can look after himself.
Help us look for him.
Micky, you know your dad.
He'll be fine.
Get yourself a drink, sit
yourself down and stop worrying.
He won't thank you for it.
What's up?
Seriously, what's up?
If he's as nice as you say he is
he won't mind helping, will he?
Micky.
Long time no see.
Ady.
How are things with
you and the missus?
It's all right, he's a fully paid up
member of the Uphill *** Stabbers.
It's over.
I came home one day and found
herbang at it with the man next door.
Didn't think that'd bother ya.
Not after what we got up to.
And the man over the road
and the man at the back
and the man from next door but one.
So you've left, then?
Yeah, I've been living with
an interior designer from Cambodia.
Can't string a sentence together,
but the flat looks fantastic
and the things he can do with a wok
have to be seen to be believed.
You should come round one night,
both of you.
I'm here about my dad.
He's missing.
Well, how long?
About 12 hours.
benders longer than that!
He's never done this before.
Ady,
please, look, this isn't like him.
Something's happened, I know it, and no
***'ll believe me and you're my last hope.
Please, Ady,
you've gotta help us.
Please
You're through to Paddy Maguire,
leave a message.
Right and what should happen now is
the base station will flag up
the phone's location.
There we go.
There we go.
Got ya!
Dad it's me!Micky, Micky calm down.
Can you hear me?
Paddy, Paddy.
I am going to radio for help.
Thanks a million for finding him.
That was down to Micky.
He led the investigation.
This is all down to me.
Nah, it's not just you, Jamie.
It's neither of you.
No-one's fault.
He knew the risks he was taking.
He asked for our help
and we said no.
We let him down, Mum.
All of us.
Well, nearly all of us.
Eating, sleeping.
Right.
Grub's up!
You're pushing the boat out.
Well, we won't get to eat till
the other side of the service so
There won't be a service.
But this is Connor's big day.
Yeah,
but not without my dad it isn't.
We're cancelling.
Right, Mum?
And how would we explain
that to wee Connor?
All I need is a clean shirt
and I'll be with you.
Patrick
it's time.
You passed muster?
Eventually.
I believe in one God,
the Father, Almighty,
maker of all things visible
and invisible.
If you'd like to
I'm not sure if I can.
It's just
I don't actually believe in God.
But if I'm called on,
I'll teach him to respect people,
no matter what they do or don't
believe in, as long as they're decent.
And I'll pray to a God I'm not
sure exists that he's loved.
I'm a ***, Father.
Ex junkie.
But I know good from bad.
And if I can teach him that,
it's job done, really.
Isn't it?
I'm sorry if I've offended.
I just don't want
to let Connor down.
Or meself.
Here, someone thought they were
very clever phoning Concepta,
putting on a voice, telling her
that her flight had been cancelled.
Only the thick *** prick of a
prankster forgot to withhold the number!
Didn't you, Shane?!
POP MUSIC PLAYS
Word's been put out.
Tell you what, whoever brings us
that kid is gonna be well flush.
Who put the word out?
Me, J, Shane.
Well, you'd no *** right.
I'm the director of Maguire Limited.
I make the executive decisions.
He's gonna pay for this, Dad.
Risking your lives?
For what? For what?!
No more of my cubs will die
on my account! Call it off.
But he hurt you and they need to
know no-one does that to our old man.
Are you ***' deaf? Call it off!
Hey, sexy.
What happened to that Long Wet
Spicy Screw?
Was just savouring the thought.
Are those limes ready yet, babe?
Ahhh.
Is he any lighter now
he's washed of mortal sin?
Didn't you fancy
jumping in yourself,
taking a spiritual cleanse?
You can't just turn up
and get christened, Frank.
There is a program.
Program!
But what would be the point, eh?
You'd only blot your copy book
the next day.
You're like me, you are.
Lured by earthly pleasures.
How could you speak to
Micky like that, in public?
The only one who you wouldn't invite into the
business, but the only one who went out looking for you.
Call yourself a father.
***! ***!
I thought raspberries
were your favourite.
Not when they're covered
in melted cow bone!
The more I demanded,
the more she dug in!
The call was a last resort.
I justI just
wanted to make it good.
I want a man, Shane, a grown-up.
But until I find one, suppose
I'll have to make do with you!
***, I'm sorry!For ***'s sake!
Why don't you go back to theloo
where you've come from,clean up?
She's a ***.
D'you know what?
Paddy nearly died yesterday
and it woke me up to something.
Life's too short.
I'm not going to
waste my life waiting for you, Karen.
You've got two men in your life.
Why can't I have two women?
Look at that.
Looks like a platypus on safari.
What the *** did you just say?
Nothing, Paddy.
A platypus on safari?!
That's right,
run, you yellow-bellied gob-***.
Utter another word that's less than kind, and I'll
do what mother nature should've done 50 years ago.
I'll erase you for good!
Nice one, Dad.
How do you think she's feeling now?
Listen.
You know something, Paddy,
you make the china shop bull
look socially deft.
I was protecting my family,
like any good father should.
Is that so contemptible?
If you don't tell mewhat you want, I
can't help you.
She's doing my head in.
What's wrong with Katie now?
The kiddies entertainer, the fella
you elbowed?With the broken nose?
He won't be performing now.
Once upon a time,
there was a King
who lived in a mighty castle.
He had all the things
a man could wish for.
But he was a lonely King.
That's right.
There was something missing.
Are you with me so far?
Then one day, he came
across a gorgeous young woman.
And before too long,
they were madly, madly in love.
And the gods blessed them
with beautiful children.
And he and his Queen
loved them unconditionally.
But the Queen grew bored
and looked to entertain herself.
Live her own life.
Without his family around him,
without their love, he floundered
and he lost his crown.
His daughter tried to
He lost his family
and he lost his Queen.
He watched as his Queen
threw everything she had
they had
down the drain.
She wanted him dead.
Never thought that he might be in
need of some *** assistance.
Never thought that
he might be actually
screaming out for some kind of help.
All he was looking for
was someone
anyone
.
.
to *** listen!
Just to *** listen!
That's all.
That's all.
Right,
we're off to bed.
Night, Mum.
Night, Mimi.
Night, Karen.
We're gonna get off an' all.
'Ghandi, Collins, yer woman
who wouldn't budge on the bus.
'All heroes.
'All freedom fighters.
'Few will ever be known
for grand acts of courage like them.
'But the taking of any liberty,
'whether it's freeing yourself to love, or speaking
what your heart truly feels, now that takes balls.
'
Night.
Pull the door to.
'Breaking the shackles of mental
and emotional incarceration.
'Only a big man manages that.
'
How do you know when things are
moving too fast? With a girl.
Blimey.
If you love her?
Do you love her?She nicked
one of my pens.
That's serious.
Please.
Just a bit more time.
Chesney, no!
Plumber? Leak?
That is our plumber.
100 quid and
he'll hold your hand in Pizza Express.
What the *** are you up to?
I'd be all right if you
could choose how you go.
You're not going to die.
What about your father?He was
a doctor.
Family of medics, eh?
So you've converted to Judaism,
but you're having violent cravings
for pork scratchings?God, yeah.
I'll see what I can do.