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VITONEN PRESENTS
3 billion human lives ended on August 29th 2013.
Survivors of the nuclear fire called the war pretty damn bad day.
Or something...
The survivors lived only to face a new nightmare -
the war against the metal junks.
Taivasverkko, which controlled these contraptions, sent two terminators -
back in time, their mission to destroy the leader of the human resistance. Joni Koivu.
My dear little piglet.
The second terminator was programmed to strike at John himself, -
when he was still a little-bittle piggyboy.
As before, the resistance was able to send a lone warrior, -
a protector for Joni.
It was only a question of which one of them would reach him first at the arcade where...
Uh, maybe I shouldn't spoil any more of it.
ACTION COORDINATION
CAMERA
MUSIC
EDIT, SCRIPT & DIRECTED BY
I need your boots, clothes and your motorcycle.
You forgot to ask nicely.
Take it!
You can't take the man's bike. Get off before I'll drop you down.
That's it, god damned.
Unit 23 here.
There's an error in the link 57 and I'll go to investigate.
Joni! Joni! Come and clean that god damn piggery of yours.
Your parents are pretty dorky.
I've about had it with that damn kid.
He won't even answer me. - Hey, move.
Could you get your *** off the sofa and help me?
Hey, hello! - What, what?
He hasn't cleaned that room of his in a month.
Oh, an emergency - I'll get right on it.
Joni! Get your *** inside and do what your mother tells you.
She's not my mother, Teppo.
PIN number...
Hurry up!
Where did you learn this stuff from? - From my mom, my real mom I mean.
Withdraw 1000 euros... come on, do it.
Yes! - Hey, it worked.
Easy money.
Yes! - Piece of cake.
Is that your mom? - Yeah.
Is she cool? - No, she's a total nutjob.
She tried to blow up a wiener stand, but it failed and now she's in mental.
You serious? - Yeah, she's a total loser.
But hey, let's go spend some money.
Are you the legal guardians of Joni Koivu?
That's right. What's he done now? - Could I speak with him please?
Yeah, if he'd be here. Took off with his bike this morning so -
he could be anywhere.
Do you have a photograph of Joni? - Yeah, hold on.
What's this about? - Just need to ask him -
a few questions.
Could I keep this picture? - Sure, go ahead.
A good-looking boy. - There was another guy looking for him too.
Yeah, a big guy on a bike. Does this have something to do with it?
Nah, you shouldn't worry about him. Thanks for your co-operation.
TARGET FOUND
He was here like 15 minutes ago. Think he said he was going to the Galleria?
Right. - The Galleria?
Hey Joni, hey Joni. - Not now, not now, I'm having too much fun.
There's a cop scoping for you.
I've seen that before. In Mellunmäki.
He probably lost his way out of his district.
You'd better go.
Hey! What are you doing here? Huh?
Answer me!
Hello? Who are you?
Get down!
ERROR
Time out, time out! Stop the bike!
Holy crap! Now don't get this the wrong way, but you're a terminator, right?
Yes. Kyberdyyni production, model 101.
No... this can't be.
Oh god! You're really real. I mean... Machine underneath, but life outside?
I'm a cybernetic organism. Living tissue over metal endoskeleton.
My mission is to protect you.
Right. Who sent you?
You did. 35 years from now you re-programmed me to be your protector -
in this time. - Sick.
Janina and Teppo are dorks, but I gotta warn them.
Oh crap. You got 20 cents?
Hello? Joni!
Sure, honey. Are you alright? - Yea yea.
Hey Joni. It's late and I started to worry about you.
Why don't you come home, I'm making some delicious pork sauce.
Something's wrong. She's never this nice.
Joni, where are you? - What the hell is that dog barking?
Shut up, bonehead!
Our dog is barking.
Tell him to get rid of that dog.
Could it already be there?
Yea, everything's fine.
What's the dog's name? - Martta.
Hey, Janina. What's wrong with Valtteri? He's barking at something. Is he alright?
Valtteri is just fine. Where are you?
Your foster parents are dead.
So it can imitate anything it touches?
Anything it has a physical contact with.
Right, get real. So he could turn into a pack of cigarettes?
Only an object of equal size.
Why not turn into a bomb or something?
It cannot form into complex machines. Bombs and weapons need -
chemicals and moving parts.
It can turn into solid metal shapes. - Such as?
Knifes and stabbing weapons.
We spent a lot of time in poor Mongolian villages and other buttholes like that.
She smuggled weapon-stuffed teddybears with some ex-baret guy.
She wanted to know everything, so I could become this great military leader.
The she got busted, and I was told she's crazy.
Then everything I'd learned, was ***.
I hated her for that. But then everything she said was true. She knew, -
and nobody believed her. Not even me.
Hey, we gotta get her outta there!
Negative. T-1000's highest probability is to copy Sara Koivu -
and just wait for you. - Great, what happens to her?
If the subject is being copied, it'll be terminated.
Oh crap, why didn't you tell me?
We gotta go to McDonald's! - Negative. It's not a mission priority.
Well it's a priority to me! What the hell is your problem?
Let me go! Help, he'll do a bacon of me!
This will not help our mission.
Let me go!
Why the hell did you do that? - Because you told me to.
What?
You have to do what I say? - It's one of the mission parameters.
Prove it. Stand on one foot.
Yes! Flap your hands.
Yes, yes!
Yes! My own terminator. Wow.
Hey kid, are you alright?
Is THAT guy alright?
Stop flapping. Get lost, cheese for brains.
What?!
Hey, we should go now... - *** you, you little dipshit!
Did you call me a dipshit?
Put your leg down! Did you call me a dipshit, huh?
Yeah. - Grab him.
It hurts, let me go! - Now who's the dipshit, compost skull?
No! Put the gun down! Get outta here! - Let's get outta here.
You were going to kill that guy! - Of course. I'm a terminator.
Listen to me very carefully. You're not a terminator anymore.
You just can't go around killing people.
Why? - Because...
Why? - What do you mean why? 'Cause you can't!
Why? - Because you just can't.
Why? - Because you're here to save people.
Why? - Uh, ask me again -
30 years from now. Listen up. I'm going to get my double cheeseburger, -
and I order you to help me. And then we go get my mom.
Why do we stop? - Promise you won't kill anyone.
Right. - Swear?
What?
Put up your hand and say: "I promise I won't kill anyone".
I promise I won't kill anyone.
Ok, put your hand down.
Well hit the gas!
No, the other one!
This is 26 reporting of a break-in to Perämäki mental institute on Haarikkakuja 1,
Two wanted suspects, tall man and a short boy. The boy has a record of pilferage, -
the man is a suspect for being a part of the 1994 wiener stand blow-up.
They've got a hospital patient with them, Sara Koivu. All units -
to Tessula area immediately. The targets are armed -
and very dangerous.
Out of the car! Right now!
Come here. - I said I was ok!
You know what you just did? Don't ever do that again.
Even for me. Get it? You could have been killed.
I had to get you out of there. Sorry. - I can take care of myself, you brat.
What's wrong with your eyes? - Nothing.
Get off me, you big metal can! I said I was ok!
Hey, watch it, bolt brain!
Do you know what you're doing? - I know human anatomy thoroughly.
I bet. Makes you a more efficient killer, right?
Correct.
Do you get hurt when you get shot? - I sense insuries. That could be called pain.
Joni, hold the light.
Will these heal?
Yes. - Good. You need to look human.
Otherwise you're useless.
How long do you live, I mean last? - 120 years on these power cells.
Can you learn stuff that you haven't been programmed with, so you could be -
more human, and not such a dork all the time?
My CPU is a neural processor, a learning computer.
The more time I spend with humans, the more I learn.
Cool.
We have to get as far from the city as possible.
Drive south.
Don't drive over 100 km/h, we don't want to be pulled over.
Affirmative.
No no, listen the way people talk. Don't say "affirmitave", -
or some crap like that. You say "No problemo!", -
If someone comes off to you with an attitude, you say "eat me!"
Or if you want to get rid of someone, say "Hasta la vista, baby!".
Hasta la vista, baby.
Yeah, or "later, dickwad". If someone gets upset you say "chill out".
You can do combinations too. - Chill out, dickwad.
See, you're getting it! - No problemo.
You want some of my fries?
You need help?
No.
How does Taivasverkko get built and who's responsible?
The man most directly responsible is Mikko-Pentti Tyräaho.
Who's that?
Director of Special Projects at Kyberdyyni Systems.
Why him?
In a few months he creates a revolutionary type of microprocessor.
Go on, then what happens? - That's when life gets exciting.
Kyberdyyni will become the largest supplier of military computer systems.
Sthealth bombers are replaced with Kyberdyyni computers.
They fly with a perfect operational record. The Taivasverkko funding bill is passed.
The system goes online on August 4th, 1997.
Hey, that happened already like 8 years ago, lugnuts!
Taivasverkko leads the strategic defense and learns at a geometric rate.
It becomes self-aware on August 29th, 2.14 am.
In a panic, they try to pull the plug.
Taivasverkko fights back. - Yes. It launches missiles against Russia.
Why? Aren't we friends now? - Because Taivasverkko knows, -
the Russian counter-strike will destroy its enemies here.
Jesus!
How much do you know about Tyräaho?
I have detailed files.
I want to know everything. What he looks like and where he lives. Everything.
Wait in the car.
You could lighten up a bit.
You should try smiling. Like this.
No, that's horrible. Practice in front of the mirror.
Enrique! Are you here?
You're pretty jumpy, Koivu!
You too. Scared like a snake.
Great to see you again, Koivu!
I said I'd be back. - I didn't hear about it.
Jolanda, come on out. We got company. And bring some *** with you too.
You should chill out sometimes. Gimme five!
Put your hand like this. Now your turn.
No no, ladies hit like that. Hit like a man.
Oh, Big John! - How's it going?
On and off. And you? - Fine.
Who's the big guy? - He's with me. Uncle Paavo.
Paavo, this is... - Uncle Paavo, huh?
My, how you've grown! So nice to see you again.
Hey, big guy. Take a drink.
Drink?
You're pretty famous, all over the god damn tv.
The police is going nuts looking for you.
I just came for my stuff. I need clothes, food and a car.
How about the fillings out of my teeth too.
Now, Enrico! You two, start packing up the car.
Come on, let's go.
There's only one thing good about my mom.
She always plans ahead.
Excellent.
The starting motor's busted. This is the best we have.
Do we have time to change it? - Yea, I'll cross the border at night.
Okay.
I grew up in places like this, and thought it was how people lived.
Riding around in fighters, and kicking some grannies.
That's definitely you.
When I was watching the world through my rounded glasses, things became clearer.
The terminator would never leave my son. It would not hurt him, -
get drunk and hit him, bite him in the leg or...
Well, you get the point.
Of all the would-be fathers who came and went, this machine -
was the only who measured up to my quality standards.
Now if only here was a table, -
to scrawl to. I would so much like to angst something on it.
For Christ's sake, not a single table in sight.
God damned, that's it! I must drain my anger to something else.
You'll leave with her. You'll meet behind the border in the morning.
She intends to change the future. - Yeah I guess.
Oh crap! - Tyräaho.
Yea! Gotta be. She's gonna blow him away!
Come on, let's go!
This is tactically dangerous. - Drive faster.
The T-1000 has the same files as I do. It could anticipate this me.
I don't care, we gotta stop her.
Killing Tyräaho might actually prevent the war.
I don't care! Haven't you learned why you can't kill people?
Hey, ***! Don't move!
I'm not going to let you do it!
What? What? What?
Shut up! Shut up!
Shut the hell up!
Oh no, we're late! Mom! Are you alright? Mom!
Check that hairy guy.
Mom, are you alright? Look at me! Mom!
I almost... - Yea yea. I know. Everything's gonna be fine.
Ok? I promise. - You came to stop me.
Yea, I know. - I love you, Joni.
I always have. - Yea...
Pretty neat penetration. A few shattered bones.
Compress here to stop the bleeding.
Who are you people?
Show him.
I think I'm gonna throw up.
You're judging me on things I haven't even done yet.
How were we supposed to know? - Yeah, right.
How were you supposed to know. People like you built the hydrogen bomb.
Guys like you thought it up. You think you're so smart.
You don't know what creating is. Creating a life. You only create death.
Mom... - And destruction!
Mom! Shut up!
We need to be a little more constructive. We still need to stop -
what's about to happen. - Indeed.
I'm not going to finish that microchip. I'll quit at Kyberdyyni tomorrow.
Not good enough.
No one must follow your work. - Right, we have to destroy everything here.
Hard drives, disks, roms, screens, CD drives, hard drives, DVDs, zips...
Everything. I don't care.
Do you know about the chip?
I keep it here in my room.
The CPU from the first terminator. - God damned, I knew it!
We weren't allowed to ask where it came from.
Lying sons of ***!
It was radically advanced. It gave us new ideas, things we would never -
have thought of.
All my work was based on it.
It must be destroyed.
I guess so. When?
Now?
Right away.
Um, excuse me. Can I borrow this?
I've worked for a hell of a long time for this.
I'll deal with T-1000. Go. - No, stay! Come with us! No, stay!
Get off!
Hasta la vista, baybe.
Mom? Mom!