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♪♪
♪ Johnny got a head of fiery hair ♪
♪ and a turbo charged backpack ♪
♪ His genius sisters use him like a lab rat ♪
♪ A neat freak dad at home ♪
♪ a super busy mom ♪
♪ The boy's best friend is a talking dog ♪
♪ Taking dog ♪
♪ That's right ♪
♪ Three extreme teens and an air breathing shark ♪
♪ Mega action game controller skating in the park ♪
♪ A pharabooster, Bling-Bling ♪
♪ What do we make of this ♪
♪ Johnny Test ♪
♪ Johnny Test ♪
♪ This is the life of a boy named Johnny Test ♪
♪ Johnny Test ♪
♪ Johnny Test ♪
♪ This is the life of a boy named Johnny Test ♪
♪♪
(BLOWS NOSE)
THE GENERAL: WE ARE FACING A THREAT
THAT CAN DESTROY ALL LIFE AS WE KNOW IT!
IS IT AN ALIEN INVASION?
IS-IS THERE A METEOR APPROACHING?
(SNEEZE)
WORSE.
I'M TALKING ABOUT SUSAN, MARY
AND JOHNNY TEST.
(CRASH)
(PANICKED SCREAMING)
DUKEY: AH-HA-HA-HA!
JOHNNY: WOO HOO!
(LAUGHTER)
(SOUNDS OF DESTRUCTION)
THE TEST KIDS HAVE CAUSED MORE DAMAGE TO THIS CITY
THAN EARTHQUAKES, FLOODS
AND SUMMER MUSIC FESTIVALS COMBINED!
HMM...
COMPUTER VOICE: MISSION TO MARS, LAUNCHING.
WEE HEE!
(EXPLOSION)
JOHNNY AND DUKEY: WOO HOO! WOO!
WHAT DO YOU SUGGEST WE DO? (SNIFFLES)
WELL, I SUGGEST THAT YOU PUT AN END TO THEIR MAYHEM
FOR GOOD!
UH, BUT FIRST PUT THAT WEAPON AWAY FOR ME WILL YOU,
THAT'S AN ORDER!
JOHNNY: YOU'VE BEEN ORDERED TO SPY ON US?
DON'T THINK OF IT AS SPYING.
THINK OF IT AS SECRETLY WATCHING YOU
TO MAKE SURE YOU'RE NOT UP TO
ANY DANGEROUS EXPERIMENTS.
DON'T WORRY.
YOU'LL NEVER EVEN KNOW WE'RE HERE.
(SNEEZE)
(SCHOOL BELL RINGS)
(MUFFLED CHEWING)
MR. WHITE: IT'S SAFE. YOU CAN DRINK IT NOW.
UH?!
COMPUTER VOICE: SCANNING BACKPACK.
SCANNING JOHNNY.
KIDS: (TAUNTING LAUGHTER)
UGH! WILL YOU PLEASE STOP THIS!
I HAVE BEEN ORDERED TO FOLLOW YOU, JOHNNY,
SO WHEREVER YOU GO I GO.
(BUS SQUEALS OFF)
HEY, SUSAN, MARY.
I'M HAVING A POOL PARTY AND I WAS WONDERING IF YOU-
MR. BLACK THEY'LL BE THERE!
AND I'LL BE THERE TOO,
TO MAKE SURE THEY DON'T EXPERIMENT
AND TURN EVERYONE AT YOUR PARTY INTO LIZARDS
OR DECIDE EVERYONE NEEDS AN EXTRA LEG!
ON SECOND THOUGHT, I'M NOT HAVING A POOL PARTY,
SO... BYE!
TELL JOHNNY I SAID HI THOUGH.
LATERS!
(ANGRY GROWL)
HEY, I HAVE MY ORDERS.
AND UNTIL I HEAR OTHERWISE,
I'M LIKE CHEESE ALL OVER YOUR MACARONI.
(SNEEZE)
SORRY, I'VE GOT A BAD HEAD COLD.
KIDS: (LAUGH)
(LAUGHING)
SO, YOU'RE ENJOYING THEIR SPYING LIKE US.
MR. BLACK: WE'RE JUST FOLLOWING ORDERS.
ALL: WE NEED A PLAN!
(ENGINES REV)
QUICK! TO THE LAB!
MARY: BEHOLD, THE MICROBE-MOBILE.
BUT IT'S BIG NOT MICROBE.
YEAH, WE CAN SEE THAT,
BUT WHEN THE 10 MILLION GIGA WATT SHRINK-RAYS BLAST IT,
IT WILL BECOME MICROSCOPIC,
SO WE CAN GET TO INSIDE THE ANNOYING SPY GUYS.
AH... I'M NOT GETTING IN THAT.
WHAT IF WE GET LOST,
Y-YOU CAN'T STOP FOR DIRECTIONS
WHEN YOU'RE INSIDE A DUDE, YOU KNOW.
RELAX, IT COMES COMPLETE WITH AN AUTOMATIC PILOT
AND A FULLY STOCKED SNACK BAR.
(GASP)
BOTH: (GULPING)
WHAT'S THE PLAN?
WE SHRINK YOU,
GET YOU INSIDE MR. BLACK'S
THEN MR. WHITE'S BODIES...
WHERE THE AUTO-PILOT WILL TAKE YOU TO THE BRAIN
AND ERASE THE MEMORY OF THEM GETTING THE ORDER
FROM THE GENERAL TO SPY ON US.
RIGHT, 'CAUSE WITH NO MEMORY OF THE ORDER
THEY CAN'T FOLLOW IT.
HUH?
MARY: LET THE AUTO-PILOT DO EVERYTHING,
UNLESS THERE'S A MALFUNCTION.
IN WHICH CASE WE'LL CONTACT YOU
AND INSTRUCT YOU WHAT TO DO MANUALLY
SO YOU CAN COMPLETE THE MISSION
AND NOT GET TRAPPED INSIDE THEM FOREVER AND CROAK.
DUKEY: SAY WHA?
JOHNNY: BLAST AWAY!
(MACHINE POWERS UP)
(FIZZLING)
COMPUTER VOICE: MICRO-PROCESSING COMPLETE.
SUSAN: AND IN THE LEMONADE IT GOES.
MR. BLACK: OKAY. WE KNOW THESE ARE ANDROIDS
AND YOU TRIED TO TRICK US.
YES, AND WE'RE VERY SORRY.
SO PLEASE ACCEPT THIS LEMONADE AS SIGN OF BEING SORRY-FULL.
(GULPING)
JOHNNY AND DUKEY: WHOO HOO!
OOH! APOLOGY ACCEPTED.
WHAT? I DON'T GET A GLASS.
BOTH: LATER.
HMPH!
JOHNNY AND DUKEY: WHOOOOO-HOOOOOO!
DUKEY: (WHISTLES) CHIPS. CANDY. PIE.
THIS GUY REALLY SHOULD EAT BETTER.
NOW LET'S JUST LET AUTO HERE,
GET TO THE BRAIN,
ERASE THAT MEMORY
AND KIDS WILL STOP LAUGHING AT ME.
(ALARM BLARES)
WHAT'S THAT?
(STAMMERS) WHAT'S GASTRO-AERIC PRESSURE?
(RUMBLING)
(PAINED GROANING)
(BELCHES)
BOTH: AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
GOT A HEADACHE.
COMPUTER VOICE: MALFUNCTION! AUTO PILOT SHUTTING DOWN.
(AIR FLITTERS AS IT RELEASES)
THAT CAN'T BE GOOD.
HELLO! MAYDAY!
WE ARE STUCK INSIDE A DUDE!
HELP!
(CRACKLING)
(BLEEPING)
MARY: UH-OH.
MR. BLACK: WHAT'S THAT MEAN, "LOST CONTACT"?
NOTHING! IT MEANS NOTHING!
(GIGGLES)
DUKEY: OKAY. LET'S USE THE EMERGENCY ESCAPE BUTTON
AND BLAST OUT OF-
JOHNNY: NO.
I'VE GOTTA ERASE THAT MEMORY FIRST.
NOW TO SEARCH FOR A MEMORY WITH THE GENERAL AND TEST.
(FIZZLING)
(PAINED GROAN) WHOA!
(EXPLOSION)
UH... WAS THAT SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN?
JOHNNY: OKAY.
GENERAL, TEST, JOHNNY.
(FIZZLING)
SPY ON JOHNNY, SUSAN AND MARY TEST
AND THAT'S AN ORDER!
THAT'S IT! NOW TO HIT DELETE.
(CRACKLING)
(REWINDING)
GAH! GOT A HEADACHE!
BAD HEADACHE. OH, AH!
HEAD IS HURTING WORSE NOW.
BOTH: OH! AH! UGH!
(GRUNTS OF EFFORT)
JOHNNY AND DUKEY: WHOAAAA!
OOH!
AGH!
(PAINED MOANS)
(PANTS LIKE A DOG)
(BARKING)
WHAT'S HE DOING?
WHAT'S GOING ON!
EITHER HE'S HAVING A NERVOUS BREAKDOWN
OR HIS BRAIN'S "ANIMAL INSTINCT" HAS BEEN ENLARGED.
MR. BLACK: (BARKS AND PANTS)
MR. WHITE: HERE, BOY.
FETCH!
HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN?
WHAT WAS IN THAT LEMONADE!
HOW CAN I PUT THIS WITHOUT YOU FREAKING OUT...
JOHNNY!
WHAT?
AND WE'VE LOST CONTACT WITH HIM.
JOHNNY?
JOHNNY WAS IN THE LEMONADE!
BUT WE'RE SUPPOSED TO STOP YOU
FROM DOING DANGEROUS EXPERIMENTS!
I KNOW.
YOU'RE NOT VERY GOOD AT YOUR JOBS.
(GROWLS)
(RUMBLING)
BOTH: AHHHHH!
OKAY. NOW LET'S USE THE EMERGENCY ESCAPE BUTTON.
(OIL SLOSHES)
IT'S PROBABLY AN ELECTRICAL LEAK
AND WHEN THE MICROBE-MOBILE RUNS OUT OF POWER
HE WILL BE FINE.
(BEEPING) (POWERING DOWN)
DUKEY HEY, WHAT DOES THAT MEAN "NO POWER"?
(PANTING STOPS)
I'M FINE NOW. IT'S COOL.
SEE! WAIT...
OUT OF POWER?!
(GASPS)
WE'RE STUCK!
WE'RE STUCK IN HERE FOREVER!
DON'T WORRY, SUSAN AND MARY ARE PROBABLY WORKING
ON SOLUTION TO GET US OUT, RIGHT NOW.
MARY: WE LOST OUR BROTHER INSIDE A MAN'S HEAD!
DAD IS GONNA FREAK!
MR. WHITE: WE WERE SUPPOSED TO MAKE SURE
YOU GIRLS DIDN'T DO ANY EXPERIMENTS!
THE GENERAL IS GONNA FREAK!
I CAN ALMOST HERE HIM STRAINING HIS VOCAL CORDS
YELLING AT US.
SUSAN: WAIT!
VOCAL CHORDS!
I THINK I KNOW A WAY TO GET A MESSAGE TO JOHNNY.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
PRESSING COLORFUL BUTTONS
BECAUSE SUSAN AND MARY ARE NOT HELPING!
(ALARM BLARES)
(MUFFLED CHOKING)
SUSAN: JOHNNY,
YOU HAVE TO GO OUTSIDE THE MICROBE-MACHINE
AND ATTACH THE JUMPER CABLES TO A BRAIN SYNAPSES
AND WAIT FOR A SUPER CHARGE!
RIGHT!
BECAUSE THE BRAIN IS FULL OF ELECTRICAL PULSES
AND WE'LL USE THOSE TO CHARGE THE BATTERY!
MR. BLACK: (SNEEZE)
MARY: OH, AND ONE MORE TINY LITTLE THING.
IF YOU SEE A SCARY LOOKING HEAD-COLD VIRUS,
DON'T LET IT TOUCH YOU!
SO I GET A COLD.
I'LL JUST STAY HOME FROM SCHOOL.
COOL.
YEAH IF YOU WERE NORMAL SIZE,
BUT A VIRUS ON MICROSCOPIC JOHNNY AND DUKEY WILL UM,
MAKE YOU GO BYE-BYE.
DUKEY: HURRY UP THE VIRUS IS COMING!
(GRUNT OF EFFORT)
THERE'S NO CHARGE!
WHAT'S IT TAKE TO GET ELECTRICITY AROUND HERE?
(GROANS)
BOTH: CAFFEINE AND SUGAR!
(GRUNT OF EFFORT)
HOT COFFEE FOR BRAIN BUZZING
AND CHOCOLATE BARS FOR SUGAR RUSHING.
THAT SHOULD GIVE HIS BRAIN A BOOST!
JOHNNY: HERE COMES THE ELECTRICITY! (ELECTRICITY SNAPS)
AHHHH!
BOTH: (PANTING)
AND HERE COMES THE VIRUS.
ONE MORE POT.
(BEEPS)
(SHUDDERS)
HUH? (SHUDDERS)
PUNCH IT ,JOHNNY!
(LOUD BLAST)
ACH! MY HEADACHE'S BACK.
BOTH: AHHHHHHH!
AHHHHHHH!
(ZAPPING)
WE MADE IT!
(KISSING NOISE)
(CHUCKLES) (KISS)
I LOVE YOU FLOOR, YES I DO.
YES I DO!
SUSAN AND MARY: AND WE LOVE YOU!
DON'T GET USED TO THIS.
MR. WHITE AND MR. BLACK: AHEM!
SUSAN AND MARY: HUH?
SUSAN: WE'RE SORRY.
BUT WE DON'T LIKE BEING SPIED ON.
WELL, WE DON'T LIKE SPYING.
ALL WE REALLY WANT IS A VACATION.
BUT THE GENERAL NEVER GIVES US ONE.
IT HURTS. IT REALLY HURTS.
HMMM...
HM!
WELL, MAYBE WE CAN CHANGE HIS MIND.
THE GENERAL: BLACK, WHITE! THANKS FOR THE LEMONADE.
STOP SPYING ON THE TEST KIDS AND GO ON VACATION.
THAT'S AN ORDER!
MR. BLACK AND MR. WHITE: YES SIR!
(INDISCERNIBLE GRUNTS)
(BARK AND SNARLS)
SUSAN AND MARY: WE ARE SUCH GENIUSES!
ALL: YES!
SUSAN AND MARY: (CELEBRATORY SONG)
♪♪
DAD: WELL, EVERYBODY...
IT'S THAT TIME OF YEAR AGAIN!
VACATION PLANNING TIME!
LET'S GO TO HAWAII AND SURF THE PIPELINE.
DUKEY AND JOHNNY: WOO HOO! YEAH!
(CHOMP)
MOM: NO, JOHNNY.
WE'RE NOT GOING SURFING.
RIGHT, SO WE'LL LIVE WITH THE LIONS
ON AN AFRICAN SAFARI?
(LION SNARLS) (AFRICAN MUSIC PLAYS)
(WHINNYING) (ELEPHANT TRUMPETS)
(CACOPHONY OF ANIMALS CHEERING)
SUSAN: DROP IT!
IT'S OUR TURN TO DECIDE WHERE WE GO THIS YEAR.
(GROANS)
WHAAA! UGH!
JOHNNY: THE DUSTY WESTERN DUDE RANCH?!
YOU'LL HAVE FUN, JOHNNY.
JUST LIKE KIDS DID IN THE OLD WEST.
THINK ABOUT IT, A WHOLE WEEK WITH NO TV,
VIDEO GAMES, OR PODPLAYERS.
AHHHHHHHHHH!
JULIE: HI, I'M JULIE.
AND NO CELL PHONES!
THERE WERE NO CELL PHONES IN THE OLD WEST.
YA-HOO!
(SPLASH)
AHHHHH! (ANGRY GRUMBLE)
OH, I MEAN, OH, THAT'S OKAY!
WHO NEEDS PHONES?
HAND THEM OVER.
(GROANS)
(SPLASH)
AND YOUR ANKLE FAX.
(MOANS)
MM! OH!
JULIE: NOW YOU'RE READY TO DUDE RANCH.
BYE NOW!
NOW, LET'S HAVE A GREAT VACATION!
(GRUNTS OF EFFORT)
AGH!
WHY WOULD SUSAN AND MARY PICK A DUDE RANCH?
I DON'T EVEN SEE ANY DUDES!
HEY, JOHNNY!
SUSAN AND MARY: HI, GIL!
GIL: HEY, GIRLS I'VE NEVER SEEN BEFORE.
(ENAMORED SIGH)
OH, YOU FORGOT YOUR DROOL BLOCK.
AND HE WILL KNOW OUR NAMES BY THE END OF THIS VACATION.
ARE YOU TELLING ME THE ONLY REASON
YOU PICKED THIS LAME VACATION IS BECAUSE GIL IS HERE?!
SUSAN AND MARY: YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT.
COME ON, IT'LL BE GREAT!
IT'S 110 DEGREES,
THERE'S HOT SWEATY BARN ANIMALS
(GUST OF WIND)
OW!
NOW LET'S DUDE RANCH!
♪♪
BOTH: (SIGH)
(GROANS OF EFFORT)
JOHNNY AND DUKEY: UGH! AHHH!
(GOAT BAA'S)
BOTH: AHHHHHHHHHHH!
CONDUCTOR: YOU'RE RIDING THE DUDE RANCH CHUG-A-TRAIN.
HANDS INSIDE THE TRAIN AND DUCK FOR THE TUNNEL.
DUKEY AND JOHNNY: (EXCITED GIGGLES) WOO HOO!
SUSAN AND MARY: WHOA!
(LAUGHING)
AGH!
(GOAT BAA'S)
JOHNNY AND DUKEY: AHHHHHHHHH!
OOH!
HEY! ALL YOU CAN EAT JERKY.
JUST PUT IN YOUR ROOM KEY.
GET ME SOME!
JOHNNY: FINE. HANG ON.
COOL!
HUH?
DO THEY LOOK HUNGRY TO YOU?
UH-HUH!
(WILD SNARLING) (SOUNDS OF STRUGGLE)
(WHINES)
JULIE: CAREFUL OF THE RAZORBACKS,
THEY CAN BE PESKY LITTLE CRITTERS.
YOO-HOO!
JOHNNY AND DUKEY: AHHHHHHHHHH!
AYAYAYAYAYAY!
CAN THIS VACATION GET ANY WORSE?
BLING BLING: OH, HELLO JONATHAN,
I SNUCK A GPS TRACKING DEVICE
INTO YOUR DREAMY SISTER'S SUITCASE,
THUS, I AM VACATIONING HERE, TOO.
OF COURSE YOU ARE.
WHOA! YOU'RE DUSTY.
YOU SHOULD TRY THE POOL.
IT HAS AN OLD WEST FEEL
AND A TOTALLY COOL SUPER WATER SLIDE!
JOHNNY AND DUKEY: WATER SLIDE?!
(GASPS)
JOHNNY: (SIGHS)
(LEAPING GRUNT)
SUSAN AND MARY: AHH, GIL.
BLING BLING: AHH, SUSAN.
JOHNNY AND DUKEY: CANNONBALL!
(HUGE SPLASH)
DAD: HUH?
JOHNNY: YEAH!
DUKEY: WEEEE!
(EXCITED LAUGHTER)
JOHNNY: HE'S NOT A DOG.
DUKEY: I HAVE A RARE HAIR DISORDER. (CHUCKLES)
I DIDN'T KNOW THEY HAD SUCH COOL POOLS
BACK IN THE OLD WEST.
THEY DIDN'T,
BUT IF WE DIDN'T HAVE A GREAT POOL
NO ONE WOULD COME.
THIS IS GOING TO BE THE GREATEST VACATION EVER!
(CAR HORN HONKS)
HUH?
JULIE: OH-NO!
IT'S WILD WHIPPIN' WILLIE AND HIS PIG PACK!
PIG PACK: (ROWDY LAUGHTER)
SHE SOUNDS SCARED.
WHY DOES SHE SOUND SCARED?
(SNARLING LAUGHTER)
AHHHH!
(ENGINES RUMBLE AND TIRES SQUEAL)
(WHIP CRACKS)
(GULPS)
EVERYBODY... OUT OF MY POOL!
(TIRES SQUEAL)
(SCREAMING)
(PANTING) (DOORS SLAM)
(EAGLE CRIES)
I'M GONNA TALK TO THE MANAGER.
BEING INVADED BY A MAD WHIPPING BIKER
WAS NOT IN THE BROCHURE.
JULIE: I'M SORRY.
WILLIE AND THE PIG PACK VACATION HERE ONCE A YEAR.
HE TERRIFIES THE GUESTS THEN LEAVES,
THEN WE ACID WASH THE POOL
AND EVERYTHING'S NORMAL AGAIN.
BUT THE GOOD NEWS IS HE'LL LEAVE YOU ALONE
AS LONG AS YOU STAY IN YOUR ROOMS ALL WEEK.
ALL WEEK! THIS IS UNACCEPTABLE.
CALL THE POLICE, NOW!
WE DON'T HAVE PHONES,
YOU KNOW THE OLD WEST. YA-HOO!
(HORSE WHINNIES)
MORE LIKE TOODLE-HOO! LET'S GO KIDS!
(CAR HORN HONKS) (DAD GASPS)
DAD: MY STATION WAGON!
BIKERS: MEXICO! DEMOLITION DERBY!
BIKER: HEE HEE! HAW HAW!
OKAY, WE CAN STILL HAVE FUN.
WE'LL ALL JUST HAVE TO STAY IN THE MAIN LODGE
ALL DAY AND NIGHT AND PLAY GAMES.
AND EAT BEEF JERKY FOR A WEEK!
(CUCKOO CLOCK CHIMES)
(GRUNTS)
SUSAN: FOR THE LAST TIME, EUGENE,
WE ARE SICK OF PLAYING CHARADES.
IT'S BLING BLING BOY,
AND IT'S SO OBVIOUS I'M AN ISOTOPE!
ALL: (GROAN)
AT LEAST I'M TRYING PEOPLE!
DAD: DINNER TIME!
THIS IS THE LAST OF THE JERKY,
SO TAKE SMALL BITES!
JERKY! WE'RE ALL SICK OF JERKY!
OKAY, NEW PLAN!
WE PASSED A GENERAL STORE ABOUT 20 MILES BACK
WHEN WE DROVE HERE,
YOUR MOM AND I ARE GOING TO SNEAK OUT
AND GET SOME REAL FOOD AND CALL FOR HELP.
IF WE'RE NOT EATEN BY BUZZARDS
WE'LL BE BACK IN ABOUT 5 HOURS.
DON'T LEAVE THIS ROOM.
BOTH: (LANDING GRUNTS) (PANTING)
SO YOU'VE LIVED RIGHT NEXT DOOR TO ME FOR 13 YEARS?
SUSAN AND MARY: YEAH.
AND YOU'RE JOHNNY'S SISTERS?
SUSAN AND MARY: YEAH.
STILL NOT RINGIN' A BELL.
SUSAN AND MARY: (GROAN)
BIKERS: (WHOOPING AND CALLING) (RAUCOUS LAUGHTER)
THOSE PIG POOPERS TOOK MY ONE WEEK AWAY FROM SCHOOL
AND I'M TRAPPED!
I WANT MY VACATION BACK!
HOW? THEY'RE AN ARMY OF BIG BURLY GUYS
WITH BIG BURLY MOTORCYCLES.
AND WHIPPIN' WILLIE WHO WHIPS STUFF.
AND WHO SMELLS BAD AND...
(WHISPERS) SCARES ME.
UGH!
AND ALL WE'VE GOT
IS A SHORT ROUND KID OBSESSED WITH SUSAN,
A HUNKY TEEN WITH A GLEAMING SMILE,
TWO GENIUS SISTERS,
A DOG THAT CAN TALK TO ANIMALS
AND ONE PIECE OF JERKY.
DID THAT DOG JUST TALK?
ALL: NO.
I'VE GOT AN IDEA.
BIKER: OH, VOLLEYBALL IS FUN!
BIKER 2: I LOVE VOLLEYBALL! (EXCITED CHATTER)
THIS IS RED LEADER TO ROUND POUND.
ARE YOU READY?
ROUND POUND, READY FOR LAUNCHING!
HERE, GOAT!
HERE, GOATY-GOAT-GOAT!
WHOA-HO-OH!
(STRAINING GROANS)
WHOA!
BIKERS: (PAINED GRUNTS)
NAY, YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING?
(NICKERS)
BIKERS: WHOOOOOAAAA!
BOTH: YEAH!
WHOA!
RED LEADER TO FLAME THROWER, STAND BY.
BIKERS: HEY!
NOW!
(FLASHES)
BIKERS: (PAINED SCREAMS)
AHHHHH!
(CHUCKLES)
OH?
WHOA!
BIKERS: GET THE KID!
HE CALLED ME UGLY.
HE MADE FUN OF MY MAW!
(ANGRY CHATTER) HEY, COME BACK HERE!
JOHNNY: NOW! (WHISTLE BLOWS)
BIKER: WHAT THE? (PIGS SNORT)
CHECK OUT OUR METHANE EXPERIMENT.
IT'S A NATURAL FLAMMABLE GAS.
(FARTING) (EXPLOSION)
BIKERS: AHHHHHHHH!
(RELIEVED SIGHS)
SUSAN AND MARY: YEAH!
(GASPS) NO!
HA!
(STEAM WHISTLE BLOWS AND ENGINE CHUGS)
SUSAN AND MARY: MAYBE THIS WASN'T THE BEST PLAN.
(LAUGHS)
NOBODY RUINS WILD WHIPPIN' WILLIE'S VACATION.
(LAUGHS)
JOHNNY: LET 'EM GO, WILLIE.
THIS LAME DUSTY DUDE RANCH PLACE
ISN'T BIG ENOUGH FOR THE TWO OF US!
CHOOSE YOUR WEAPON.
AH!
HEH! YOU'RE GOING TO FIGHT ME WITH BEEF JERKY?
(LAUGHS)
AH, OH.
WELL KID, YOU LOSE.
UH-HUH...
I DON'T THINK SO.
(SCARED) THEY LOOK HUNGRY.
(SNARLING)
WILLIE: AHHHHHHHH!
AND NOW, YOU'RE ALL WET.
(GRUNT OF EFFORT)
WILLIE: I'LL NEVER COME BACK HERE AGAIN!
MOM AND DAD: (PANTING)
BOTH: JOHNNY!
ALL: JOHNNY!
HUH?
(STEAM WHISTLE ***)
(GROANS)
(WHIMPERS)
(GRUNT OF EFFORT)
(SHRILL SCREECH)
JOHNNY: THAT WAS FUN!
NOW THIS IS THE WAY TO DUDE RANCH.
LOOK AT EVERYONE HAVING FUN,
EVEN THE CRITTERS.
(HORSE WHINNIES)
(PIG SQUEALS)
(COW MOOS)
GIL: SUSAN. MARY.
I THOUGHT I'D BRING YOU A SASPERILLA.
MARY: THANKS!
AND MAYBE YOU COULD COME OVER SOMETIME
AND HANG OUT!
DO YOU LIVE NEAR BY?
WE LIVE NEXT DOOR TO YOU.
WE'RE JOHNNY'S SISTERS.
UH... NOT RINGING A BELL.
LATERS!
SUSAN AND MARY: AT LEAST HE KNOWS OUR NAMES.
BLING-BLING: UM...
IS THIS LOUNGE CHAIR TAKEN?
YOU CAN SIT,
BUT ONLY FOR TODAY,
BLING BLING.
(QUIVERING) SHE SAID MY NAME!
SUPER CANNONBALL!
DUKEY: (EXCITED LAUGHTER)
JOHNNY: AHHHHH!
WHOOOAAA!
(LAUGHING)