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Remembering has become a difficult task for me.
Memories are dim -
they come in the company of so many mistakes.
Most of the times,
we only remember what we would like to preserve for us.
The facts as they really happened
become whispers of something we can no longer see.
In December 2005,
Francisco told about a place in Costa Chica,
where he had gone to recently,
and about someone known as "El Güero",
who had made a deep impression on him.
"His dad was killed", he told me.
He came back to avenge him.
Death is part of life.
In this place, there's nothing clearer than that.
-And so, what happened to El Güero's dad?
A friend who lives up there killed him.
He got killed right over there.
Just like that.
He was asking the guy some money he had lent to him.
And the guy didn't like that.
And so he stabbed him. He killed him right there.
Then he went for his car,
and fled that way, up there,
that's where he has his home.
He stopped and said, "you're following me."
Then he took out his gun and shot him.
To find him...
It's easy to find him in town.
No matter where you come from,
people realize it easily,
they, themselves, tell you...
"the guy you're looking for lives up there."
Justice? Where's justice?
Man, it's been almost two years!
And we could still get killed,
although we didn't do anything.
-But, wait...why?
Because that's how things are here in Guerrero
If you don't do anything, someone may do something to you.
That's why I don't dive no more. And I'm a good diver.
I know how to dive.
He already saw me diving.
I'm good at it!
But I rather go working in the construction,
laying bricks, plastering,
tiling floors, I know a bit of that.
And I like it.
Say he won't come for us. But he will come from the back.
From the back...
I mean, he's already lost so much.
He has tons of problems.
-So, you're not the only ones he has problems with?
Also with my family, that lives here,
He is free and killed my cousin...
Over nothing, my cousin did nothing to him.
-The plaque in your home!
-The one with the bull and two roosters in it, what does it mean?
Yeah, that's a... what do you call it?
It's like a plaque thingy...
that shows it belongs to the family...
Ventura Pérez.
-But, what do the roosters and bull mean?
Well, the bull is like...
well, my pop is a rancher...
He's been a rancher for many years,
and my bro, El Güero, made the plaque
when he was in Vallarta.
And I mean, he doesn't breed roosters, but still my bro put them in it.
-The bull means he's a rancher? -Yeah, it does.
-And what about the roosters?
I don't know why he put the roosters in it!
Maybe he put the roosters because...
dunno, to tie it up, maybe.
-Your Dad didn't breed roosters?
No, he was a rancher.
The cemetery is over there...
Over there, it's close to my land lot.
Very close to it!
People go to pay their respects.
They bring candles to the bereaved family.
They help them, give them some money.
Some may give them fifty pesos,
100 pesos, it depends...
they may give them 200, 300 even up to 500 pesos.
To help the bereaved family, you know.
The custom we have here...
in Guerrero is really expensive.
When someone dies,
the family spends lots of money.
Even the poorest ones manage to do it.
- Barbacoa? -Yeah, broth.
They cook for everyone.
Nine days later, once again!
It's called Cabo de Novena
-And that's another cow!
They cook other beef or pork. But they feed everyone.
And give them ***!
For nine days!
When the nine days are over,
All of the ladies who went to pray
get a bag with bread.
And all of those who went during those 9 days
get some more meat!
Man, it's a lot a money!
You spend tons of money!
It's way more expensive to have a funeral than a wedding!
It's the custom here, I'm telling you.
In the city, it's not like that, right?
-There are oysters over there.
-Yeah, because there hasn't been much diving.
It'll be all the same, until tomorrow at 4.
Make good money!
-He ain't getting on that one!
-He drank a mouthful.
-Drink some water and you'll be all confused.
I think it was there...
but over there, there are only...
-Come on! we must go there! -But he fished little!
He has never taken advantage of anyone!
-How come? He doesn't even have a crowbar!
No, I mean in the caves...
we still have other mines...
some caves, there are many.
There are many rocks.
Let's go then, I won't stand here watching.
Stay! He's about to throw a cast net.
No, I fished twenty yesterday.
-Thirty. -And there's no more.
We're going over there. Are you staying or coming?
-Let's go.
So, are we going to La Ballena?
Yeah, I don't like it here. The vibe ain't good.
We should go to La Piedra del buzo instead.
We'll see where we can go.
Let's go already, Leo, we'll be late.
-Let's go then. -Let's go.
We'll be laying there for a couple of hours.
My brother, he killed himself.
-you had a brother?
He climbed a tree, put the noose around his neck and jumped.
It is said he couldn't take the pressure our pop put on him.
I did take it. I just left, I wasn't stupid.
My brother should have done the same.
Our dad scolded him a lot.
***, Man! Why didn't Mom sent him away?
Sent him to where a I was living. Food wasn't a problem.
They didn't find a solution.
And since my pop was like that, he was a joker...
So my pop never took him seriously.
If he had been been smart...
he could have sent him to live with an uncle or something.
And he would still be here. He wouldn't have done that.
And where's Mom?
She's in church. Go there for a while...
Go to mass.
I'll go bring her for you.
It's hard! Working is hard...
And still, we don't use money wisely.
-Why is that?
-Because of ***.
And we, the ones who make money...
I mean the ones who don't know
how hard is it... Bro!
They say we make money easily by diving.
Easily? Really? ***.
They say we only do it for about two hours...
And then we make about $300, $400 and up to $500
in just two hours.
-you want me to keep it for you?
So then, why did you take it?
You gotta have brains to work.
To do this or the other.
We gotta turn up there, to the other corral.
Here, work is hard.
Work is tough here!
The hardest is working in construction.
In the fields, too...
Clearing out the hills with a machete.
Now that wind is calm, we should go!
Yeah! We gotta wait for the waves to calm a bit.
-It's way too early!
Let's go! Sea is perfect now!
Then we'd want to go and the wind will be too strong.
Let's go now, if we want to make it back at noon.
In two hours, little by little.
Hey you, keeper!
Take it easy, man!
Keeper! Easy, man!
-Cuma! Easy, man!
No, I couldn't sleep. It's been days since I can't sleep.
I mean, I don't think it's insomnia.
Someone it's whising bad.
I mean, I wanted to come back for a long time now!
But my chick,
she wouldn't let me come back.
I'd just say to her, "I'm leaving."
And finally I did. I came back.
I mean, I wanted to come back way before...
and now that something happened to my pop...
Now that he was killed...
And she wouldn't let me come back even then! She said I was lying.
And I told her I wasn't! I showed her the letter I got.
When I went back from work, the letter was already there.
There's bad people.
No, I didn't feel good when I just came back.
When I saw you...
-I couldn't sleep at night. -Yeah, I remember.
I drank and drank, and I couldn't get drunk.
As if I wasn't drinking at all.
Beer, beer and more beer.
No matter how hard I tried
I couldn't sleep.
And finally, I told you: "Time to go to bed."
I even felt relaxed.
Yeah, there's money but...
people don't want to work.
they go like... they just go up North.
Many people don't have a land, so they have nothing.
They take the risk, and they make it!
They get used to life there...
if they don't have a house, they get a nice one.
-But, do they come back?
-Yeah, they buy a land lot, up hill.
They clen it up and start sowing.
And then they harvest.
This is the cemetery, I mean, that's the entrance.
Yeah, it's divided into families.
This is my Uncle's, that one is my cousin's.
And there are my pop, and his brother.
They are together.
Over there, there's a cousin; family only.
An uncle.
It's all family.
A house of stone, very close.
When I was born, my pop was already a rancher.
Well, I mean my grandpa...
My grandpa's name was Sóstenes Ventura.
I can say he was the richest man in Playa Ventura.
As to cattle and everything else. He had land lots.
So he was like a business man.
-So, what are they preparing for your wedding?
Two cows.
- Barbacoa?
Two cows. I hope it's enough.
It should be.
And so, now that you're getting married,
-Do you feel like your life has changed?
What do you mean?
-I mean that if you'll be drinking less.
Dunno, I like drinking...
But now I think it twice!
I mean, beer is delicious!
-Soon you'll be taking care of your children.
-Just like Lencho.
But hanging in my home will be different.
Because friends...
And I mean real friends...
I mean, they do are your friends and they hang with you...
But if you get wasted and fall asleep...
You have no more friends, then.
They'd leave me there.
And if I had money on me, they'd take it.
You know I'm right.
If I'm in my home, who's gonna rob me?
I'm locked in there.
I just fall asleep...
It's like locking a vicious dog...
And if someone lets the dog out...
There would only be a problem if someone breaks in
Then, I'll ask what he's doing there...
What's he looking for?
-How many children are you planning on having?
Not many. Two or three.
-Just like Lencho.
That's right.
Exactly.
-Hey, and how old is your girlfriend?
I already told you.
15, right?
She's young.
-What are you the most nervous about?
-That he won't be satisfied! But they're past that.
-Right? -Yep.
-We'd like to ask...
-the groom's parents to the floor!
-Ms. Leobarda Pérez Gaviota and her escort.
-Kiss her!
-Let's raise our glasses!
-and pray to God, our creator,
-for this young couple's happiness.
-When I finish counting three..
-we will toast!
-One!
-Raise your glasses!
-Two!
-Glasses to the center!
-Three!
-Bottoms up!
-Cheers!
In Spring 2012, I went back to Costa Chica.
Playa Ventura wasn't the same.
Streets were concrete coated,
and everything moved faster.
The case of El Güero's dad
was still unpunished.
On that same day, I looked for them.
I couldn't find them.
Their families didn't remember me either.
Memory is fragile, blurry,
erratic.
We only remember what we want to keep for ourselves.
The rest is just whispers,
whispers of something we can no longer see.
Subtitled by Nidia de la Vega