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hey there welcome to my channel
today I'm going to be talking about bipolar disorder and it's symptoms explained
because I really would've loved this information
when I was first starting out, learning about bipolar disorder
so let's jump right in
the symptoms that the DSM ... DSM 5? um
what they say is the symptoms of bipolar, for hypomania in particular
since that's what this video's going to focus on is:
A distinct period of persistently elevated, or irritable mood
Inflated self-esteem or grandiosity
Decreased need for sleep
More talkative than usual or pressure to keep talking
Flight of ideas or subjective experience that thoughts are racing
distractibility
Increase in goal-directed activity or psychomotor agitation
Excessive involvement in pleasurable activities that have a high potential for painful consequences
so, the mood has got to be unusual for the individual, and noticeable by other people
and it's not severe enough to cause marked impairment, which means that, y'know
you're not going to be ending up in hospital
or end up, uh, *dead gesture* kinda thing
in terms of being diagnosed you've got to have hypomania for at least 4 days
where as for mania it would be 7 days
hypomania = 4 days, mania = 7 days or longer
because I've heard some people have mania for months and that just sounds terrible
I have bipolar not otherwise specified, and it is "not otherwise specified" because
I have hypomania, but it's only for 2 days at a time
it could be longer, but I've been on medication for a really long time
so it's difficult to see what length my actual mood cycles are
uh I'm going to explain each of the symptoms I listed before
starting with elevated mood
this can come in the form of...
singing, dancing, listening to upbeat music. or maybe, listening to it on repeat
positive swelling in your gut. y'know, when you just feel so good
and i don't know, it's a gut feeling
you'll know the feeling if you've had it before, i guess
thinking that things are so beautiful you can cry
like seeing the sky and... literally being close to tears. not just thinking you could be close to crying
but actually being that close to crying
laughing at everything
thinking that this is the best you've felt in years
or months... y'know. same difference
or feeling like you've taken drugs
or like you're drunk, but you're not
like you haven't taken any drugs but it feels like you have
i hope i explained that right
and i'm going to jump into the next one which is: irritable mood
there's a difference between bipolar moody, and y'know average teenager moody
and that difference is, um...
threatening to kill people
breaking things. yelling. needing to be alone.
breaking up with someone with no explanation
and intrusive thoughts
that last one, eh..
can kind of be when you think about doing those sort of (destructive) things
um... it could also be
like self harm thoughts, suicidal thoughts and things like that
an intrusive thought i had the other day was:
I really need to smash/stomp on the pigeon that I see on the pavement in front of me
i don't know why. i don't WANT to hurt a pigeon. it just... eh. those thoughts kind of happen sometimes.
goal oriented activities and psychomotor agitation
that can come in the form of: having the desire to travel, or actually travelling
for me, i sometimes go to the beach (in winter. yeah.)
it's because, I think my body has the subconscious desire to calm itself down
which means that the medicine is working and it's capping the hypomania to an extent
other examples can be: becoming a workaholic
being at the gym for hours on end, researching things obsessively
i tend to research things like jobs, even though I'm a student and I'm not supposed to be job searching for another couple months
you could also organise your wardrobe or clean the whole house
i have definitely done that
writing and drawing for hours on end (up at 7am, instead of doing schoolwork...)
shaking your hands and legs, fidgeting non-stop
i have done that as well
that's... pretty much the definition of psychomotor agitation
i once timed it and i went literally an hour of non-stop leg shaking
and my leg was not even exhausted afterwards
it was insane
pacing... a lot of people do pacing, or they even run because they have so much energy inside them
feeling like every cell in your body is vibrating
or feeling like there's bees under your skin. although i'm pretty sure that can also come under psychosis, so...
mostly just feeling like you're vibrating
constantly like that
grandoisity, or inflated self esteem:
this can come in the form of wanting attention IRL and on social media
posting really frequently (spam posting)
using showman phrases. i think this is more of a personal one where
i kind of, in my head or even out loud i kind of talk like I'm speaking to a grand crowd on a broadway show
I think it's phrases like: ladies and gentlemen!
as though I'm the main performance, a big star, that sort of thing
believing that you can do things better, or that you know better than others
which can sometimes come in the form of not taking your medicine when everyone is like
"you should really start taking your medicine because you're acting a little *cuckoo gesture*"
another form can be admiring yourself in the mirror/in photos
showing off what you've done, rather than considering the consequences
for example, uh..
i bought a bike, and i was very excited when i bought it. and unlike a compulsive spender
compulsive.. buyer? idk what it's called
i was proud and i was really excited about this purchase whereas a compulsive spender would've been lowkey
"oh no i really shouldn't have bought that.."
that was a really bad idea, but i can't help it
um... so yeah. it's different for us (bipolar folk)
we're really convinced that we're right about what we're doing
decreased need for sleep: speaks for itself. but i thought i'd explain anyway
so this can come in the form of restless sleep, waking up frequently
a good way to track this is to use a fitbit (i'm not sponsored lol)
generally getting less than 5-6 hours of sleep
although this can depend on your overall sleeping pattern in general, on your baseline
because i know a guy who can sleep 4 hours a night and that's just how he is
the doctor said he didn't have insomnia as long as he could function and was feeling alright, then that was his baseline
so... find your baseline and generally, anything less than that could be a symptom of hypomania
and when we get less sleep we don't even feel tired
although we might get a headache, we might yawn and our body feels heavy but our mind just does not feel affected whatsoever
or it can take a really long time to sleep because the psychomotor agitation just keeps us up and jittery all night
talkativeness and pressured speech:
this can come in the form of; interrupting people
stuttering, repeating words, and talking/oversharing to strangers
maybe you go up to someone and be like
talking to them even though they're sending out signals that they don't want to be spoken to
but you're not aware of that because you're hypomanic
you have to keep speaking
even though... uh sometimes you might even be aware that you shouldn't be speaking
you just can't help it
flight of ideas:
this means jumping from topic to topic (birds! burgers! boxes!)
um, either in your head or out loud
having overlapping thoughts in your head
mine... my racing thoughts kind of is more fast thoughts rather than overlapping thoughts, i guess
i can interrupt myself in my head which is very annoying
i kind of feel sorry for people when i'm doing it out loud
because i know what they're dealing with
i have to deal with it a lot more than they do
intense imaginary conversations
i've definitely been victim to that one
i remember i had a hypomanic episode where i was really irritable
and i just had this really mad conversation with my doctor in my head
some people have conversations with their therapist in their head
that can be therapeutic sometimes
but... it just depends what form it takes
and if it's very fast an intense it's probably a symptom of hypomania
distractibility: this can come in the form of
forgetting to eat
generally after 6 hours of no food
i say 6 hours because i remember reading a resource at one point that said your body generally gets hungry after 6 hours
so if you're not really noticing that hunger, then that's probably the distractibility
or you have an eating disorder and you should also check that out ;)
losing your train of thought mid-sentence. this can be in your head or outloud
being unable to read or write well
sometimes people find that their writing is really big and loose and doesn't really make much sense
you get the sensation that time is going by really quickly
you're not able to understand what people are saying
i remember i had this earlier today and i was like: "people are speaking words but i just don't know what they're saying"
not recognising someone, because hypomania can affect your memory
this can happen during or after a hypomanic episode
i remember i was hypomanic the first time i went to see my psychiatrist
and the next time i saw him, i just did not recognise him, even though it'd only been 6 weeks since our last meeting
i didn't recognise his face or personality
and when he kind of.. went to pick me up for our appointment i was like: "... who are you..?!"
i just had to go along with it
and also, not remembering being hypomanic is generally common as well
unfinished tasks can also be a symptom of distractibility
you just kind of start loads of projects and you don't get any of them done
risky behaviour:
this can come in the form of
depending on how wealthy you are, spending generally over £50/$50 on stuff you don't need
um, like working class kind of... 10k a year... you're not going to have as much money to spend compared to someone who earns 3 times that much
so it's obviously going to depend on your wealth
maybe find out how much you spend generally and try to work out what you would consider overspending
risky behaviour can also be selling your possessions,
gambling, loads of *** and ***, having one night stands, many *** partners, sexting strangers
doesn't necessarily have to be strangers
uh, it can be people you know
just generally doing it a lot more than you would normally do
eh, sneaking out, drinking,
smoking
again, in excess
having self harm and suicidal behaviour
race-driving, tattoos and piercings
technically, the risky behaviour is only if you're doing it in excess or if it's something you would not normally do
like if you're someone who gets a tattoo every now and then, that doesn't necessarily mean it's a risky behaviour
it's like i said, if it's not within your character to do those kind of things (or if you can't afford to but are still doing it)
and a couple more i thought i should mention
because they're very common in... idk the bipolar fandom..?
um, people with bipolar often have
heightened senses like sight, touch, hearing, taste and smell
i remember i had a ham and cheese sandwich the other day
when i was hypomanic
and i was completely engrossed with how soft the bread was
and how fulfilling the cheese was
i'd had that sandwich before and it was a very different experience this time
it's like that one episode of Lost
you've eaten mangoes for years on end, and this one particular mango
is very very delicious
other symptoms can be muscle aches and headaches (while hypo)
typically, bipolar people have migraines which means that
it's one particular part of your head, anywhere, and it can also make your feel nauseous
or dizzy and kind of things like that
anxiety is another one
sometimes your anxiety just does not go away
um, it kind of overrides the hypomania (even the euphoric one) if you have an anxiety disorder
like for me uh,
i can still be kind of talkative
but it's always kind of, either, to myself or through the form of social media
so it doesn't necessarily have to be something that (happens around other people)
you might need stimulation when you're hypomanic
cigarettes, music, caffeine
when i'm hypomanic i will listen to music at full volume
with my headphones on and i will try and make it as loud as possible
when normally i would have my volume up at 20%
when i'm hypomanic it'll be at 100% and if i can make it louder, i will do my best to try
another one can be having really hot/feverish skin and a fast heartbeat
i'm not sure why but...
i also feel really nauseous when I'm hypomanic
and that also kind of makes it difficult to eat
because i just won't be hungry
that also adds onto the distractibility
where you forget to eat, if you don't want to eat you'll go even longer without eating
and obviously that's detrimental to your health
so all these symptoms that i've listed can fluctuate through the episode and they can change with every episode
so think of it like a soundboard
a DJ mixer soundboard
and each symptom is a dial
you can have full blown/intense risky behaviour
kind of playing about with that, they can all be different levels
they can happen simultaneously
some of them aren't there at all/ dial turned to 0
some of them.. you get some part of it...? i guess?
like you don't have to tick all the boxes
like for risky behaviour you don't have to have all the symptoms i listed. just 1 (one) will count as a Risky Behaviour Symptom TM
i hope that makes sense
i'm trying really hard to make sense because i'm terrible at making sense when
i'm talking to a video camera and trying to read off a phone screen at the same time
so i hope you found this helpful
i hope you were able to look through it and take notes... maybe?
i would add a transcript but that would be counter intuitive since i made a video (and yet here i am)
see you next time, and i hope you are able to learn whatever you need to learn about bipolar disorder