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Let's get some more.
# Yes, no, maybe
# I don't know
# Can you repeat the question?
# You're not the boss of me now!
# You're not the boss of me now!
# You're not the boss of me now!
# And you're not so big!
# You're not the boss of me now!
# You're not the boss of me now!
# You're not the boss of me now!
# And you're not so big!
# Life is unfair #
We're not renting the fanciest place
here but I have a place to work
on my cliff diving.
Wow
Roxy's sharing a houseboat
with Stevie's family on a man-made
lake by the power plant.
I don't want to meet the girl
that would impress.
Do not touch!
I'm not!
Hal, let me see you bathing suit.
No.
The ones you picked out
are too big and baggy.
Baggy is good.
It's less
surface area I have to shave.
I like the little ones.
No.
You always pop out.
I do not.
That was one time.
The
Kenarbans are conservative people.
We'll be in very close quarters
with them.
Get the baggy ones.
Let me show you something.
Not the suit in the egg.
Don't say anything till
you see it.
Watch out! >
(CLATTERING)
Dewey
Can I see that spear gun?
Sure.
Now, don't tell me this doesn't do
somethin' for ya.
(GASPS)
I-I-I'm sorry.
I
thought you were my wife.
You see, my wife has the
exact same shape (GASPS)
(GASPS)
So when you and I get
back, you know, if you wanted,
maybe I could
give you a call.
Maybe.
Psst! >
Psst! Psst! (LAUGHS)
Whoa.
Look at that guy.
Psst! Psst!
Do you know him?
Who? That nutcase?
Of course not.
Help me
choose a surf board.
OK.
(Malcolm!) Oh
For the love of! Oh!
Excuse me.
Oh! God, it's not
me, it's the suit.
I am a normal person!
I'm here with my family.
My son is Malcolm!
Come with me.
I know how this looks
but I'm telling you Malcolm!
No! No! This is a complete
misunderstanding.
Dude, where were you?
If Spangler finds out you blew off
drill practise, he'll kill you.
I'm not afraid of him now.
Why aren't you in uniform?
I'm leavin'.
I'm outta here.
You can't just leave.
Yes, I can.
I just turned 18, I'm legally
an adult and no-one can tell me
what to do! I'm outta here!
You're not gonna graduate?!
I'm going to Alaska.
Francis, it's crazy up there.
You can make $45 an hour
working on oil rigs or logging camps
and you don't even need a diploma.
Wait! $45 an hour?
That's with
room and board.
You work a couple of years
and you're set for life.
Somethin' to remember me by.
Do you realise how close
your father came to being
a registered sex offender?!
A registered sex offender!
And for what? For some
trampy girl? Mom, please!
I feel terrible.
I completely
understand what I did.
I sold out my own father for a girl.
It's the worst thing I've ever done.
We both agree I'm
a terrible person.
For some girl you don't even know!
Who wouldn't even give you the time
of day! That's your gratitude?!
Maybe I'm the
good one after all.
Here, Mom.
For your throat.
I put a little honey in it.
One vacation a year
and this is how you start it!
(PHONE RINGS)
You go and make it right!
Hello?
Dad's probably not that mad at me.
I mean, it's not like I
shoved him in the squad car.
Dad, can I talk to you? Er, no.
not right now.
I'm kinda busy.
Reese, can you help me?
Sure, Dad.
I love to be helpful.
Can you close the door?
Absolutely not, Francis!
"You're not listening.
"
I can make $45 an hour.
That's more than you or Dad makes.
You are going to graduate
from high school.
Why spend the tuition? It's a waste
of money.
We both know I'm failing.
OK, now we both know.
Francis, you are going to stay
in school until you graduate
and that's all there is to it.
If you flunk out,
you'll do another year!
You just can't stand the fact
I'd make more money than you!
(CRASHING)
Argh!
Whoa.
That was close.
(SMASHING)
Oh, look at all this
lovely scenery and nature.
This will be wonderful.
Dear,
did you pack my hat? Oh, I'm sorry,
honey.
You should have asked me to.
No problem.
I'll just
create one out of newspaper.
Everything OK?
Everything's wonderful.
We're on vacation.
The whole drive up here
Dad wouldn't look at me.
I just wish I could take
those two minutes back.
That's the King Of The Seas?
(SCREAMING)
No TV! There's no TV!
There's no TV! There's no TV!
(CHUCKLES) There's your TV.
I don't see any TV.
Excuse me.
OK.
Dad, I'll help you with that.
(GRUNTS) No, no.
I've got it.
Dad, please.
Wait.
Come on.
Talk
to me, please.
OK, fine (CHUCKLES)
Oh, I wanted to wait till this
afternoon but what the heck?
Check this out.
It's a Cavanaugh.
Remember last year
you saw a picture of a father
and a son fishing together and said,
"I'd like to try that"? Yeah
Yeah, well, I kept lookin'
at that picture and thinkin'
about you and me,
and I started putting
a little money away, and,
you know, I,
I got this for ya.
Oh, man, you wouldn't believe
how hard this week has been.
Every time I looked at you
I wanted to spill the beans but
This is why you wouldn't talk to me?
We'll take the Dingy out
and do some fishin'.
Just the two of us.
Great.
See you on board, Skipper.
Hey, guess who's
still the good one.
Do you?
I see it too.
Hey, boys, what are you doing?
I don't know.
What are you doing?
Where did you
get the boat?
We stole it from our spirit camp.
We're going for cigarettes.
Spirit camp? So,
you girls are?
Cheerleaders.
Bad! Cheerleaders!
Yeah.
We haven't seen any boys
in, like, six weeks.
Even you guys are
starting to look good.
(ALL GIGGLE)
(BOAT ENGINE REVS)
Wait.
Where are you guys going?
Follow us and find out.
Get the boat!
Ready to go fishing, son?
Now?
Yeah.
We're catching everyone's dinner.
Now, don't you take this personally,
alright? This is a special thing
with Malcolm and me, just this once.
Too bad you can't come with us(!)
Too bad we're
taking the boat(!)
Oh Oh
No.
At least Reese and Stevie
are as bored and miserable as I am.
Remember to call me
.
.
Snoop
.
(MIMICS TARZAN'S CALL)
(MIMICS TARZAN'S CALL)
(SIGHS) This is great.
To just relax with adults.
"Suffocate".
Good for you, Abe.
"Cry baby.
" I believe
that's two words, dear.
OK, then.
Just "baby".
I heard what happened.
My, my, my.
All that splintered wood and broken
glass.
(TUTS) I brought you something.
What's that?
A hammer.
I expect you to repair the case.
You'll find lumber in the common
room.
I have a nine-inch
gash in my leg! Hmm
That's quite a handicap.
Cadet, you damaged school property!
You are the one responsible
for repairing it.
Consider it a
character-building lesson.
I didn't damage anything.
That was negligence.
The phone wasn't properly connected
to the wall! It's unfair!
I decide what's
fair around here.
But wait.
Maybe
I've been hasty.
No.
Now that I've reconsidered,
the decision stands.
You will fix the damage by the end
of the week.
That is all, Cadet.
Dewey, you have to let go of
the rope.
You're all sunburnt.
No.
Just let go.
It's gonna be
dark soon.
I can't.
Yes, you can.
Just open your fingers.
But I'll fall.
That's the point.
Dewey, don't think, just do it.
Just let go! No!
Oh, for crying out loud!
You let go of that rope
and you come in for dinner!
Come on, honey!
No.
Ow!
I'll make French fries.
Ow!
Your favourite.
Ice cream.
You know you love ice cream.
And it was wriggling and fighting.
And finally I got it on the hook.
That was one helluva worm.
I was
sure I'd catch something with it.
Dewey, pass the salt, please.
Where'd you get
that shiner? Mom
It was horrible.
It was like we were
there for hours.
It was so boring.
What are you smiling about?
I like these potatoes.
You guys went to the camp?
Oh, man.
What was it like?
Imagine 100 fat guys fallin'
downstairs knocking over old ladies.
Multiply that by 10
and you're not even close.
Until today
.
.
I'd have traded my life
.
.
for anybody's
No way.
It's Mom's.
If it were Mom's,
would I do this?
(SIGHS)
That was delicious.
I am so sorry about Abe.
What do you mean?
Oh, you're sweet to pretend,
but I know he's ruining the vacation
with his pouting and sarcastic
little digs.
If it's bothering you, talk to him.
(SIGHS) Sure is a beautiful night.
You're right!
Anything is better than this!
Oh, Malcolm, better hit the hay.
We're getting up early tomorrow.
Nightie
.
.
night
(LAUGHS)
I'll tell you what the problem is.
I hate this boat, I hate this place
and everything about this vacation!
Then, why didn't you say anything?
What difference would it have made?
This trip was your idea!
And God knows, whatever Kenny wants,
Kenny gets!
Stop behaving like a total ***!
I could be sitting in a suite
in Hawaii right now!
They can't afford that.
Pardon me for going to
college and earning a decent living!
Should I drive a crappy car
cos they do, too?!
They cannot hear me!
And even if they could,
they'd understand it's
just my puckish sense of humour.
(Don't you worry.
They're not that
smart.
) Turn on the radio.
Yeah.
(SNORING)
(SNORES)
What?
Nothing.
I didn't want it to come to this
but there's only so far I can be
pushed.
You don't have to convince me.
This is the kind of injustice
the Alabama legal system addresses.
Just sign here.
And we'll need your parents'
signatures at the bottom.
Great!
I'm a notary as well as a lawyer so
I can have this expedited.
Great.
(PHONE RINGS)
(MIMICS FEMALE VOICE) Hello?
Well, he's in with a client.
Can he call you back?
Mom, please! We
can't watch Dewey!
We already have plans.
Now
they include your brother.
Mom!
This isn't a negotiation! Take your
brother with you and have fun!!!
(WHIMPERS)
Now, remember,
this is a magic buoy.
Mermaid's are drawn to it
and they'll grant your every wish.
But they won't show up if there's
more than one person here.
Just leave.
Don't insult me.
Hi, Malcolm.
Me and my naked friends
got tired of waiting for you.
You don't want Reese to have all
the fun, do you? (GASPS) (GASPS)
What happened? Did
you catch something? No.
We're not gonna catch
anything.
I know.
(LAUGHS)
This is really
awful, isn't it?
(SIGHS) I don't think there's
a darn fish in this whole lake.
You know what?
It doesn't matter.
It's just nice
bein' out here with you.
Dad.
Mmm?
You know the other day at the store
when I pretended not to know you?
Yeah.
That was a new low.
Well, there was this girl.
Really?
I'm sorry.
I know.
Ooh! Looks like you got
a nibble! OK, set the rope.
Let him run.
OK,
reel him in.
Reel him in.
Look at that, huh?! (LAUGHS)
Come to Poppa, baby.
You betcha! Oh, yeah!
That's a striper!
(LAUGHS) Look at that beauty!
Way to go, Malcolm!
Thanks, Dad!
Oh, look at that!
(< GIRLS LAUGH / CHATTER)
Huh Isn't this
your brother's shirt?
(ENGINE REVS)
Ugh!
Why?
Ugh!
You are in so
much trouble!
I know!
I can't believe
it either.
Hi, Dewey!
(BELL RINGS)
If you'll excuse me, dear,
I think I'll take a nap
on my luxurious foam bed.
How long you gonna let this go on?
I tried to talk to him.
It didn't
help.
Maybe you came on too strong.
Start by apologising.
You don't have to mean it.
You have one day of vacation left.
You wanna spend it like this?
Alright.
I can
swallow my pride.
You think you're
on some picnic?!
With your long
suffering sad eyes
and your pouting?
You are a big,
over-indulged momma's boy!
You are an uptight,
impossible-to-please, control freak!
I can't take it any more! What will
you do about it, momma's boy?! Huh?!
What's the big momma's boy
gonna do about it?! (THUDDING)
(CRASHING)
Oh, my God
I'm sorry.
I thought
you were fighting.
(BUMPING)
I didn't see anything!
Oh, dear God!
Three weeks of slave labour.
My relationship with Dad
will never be the same
and I can't stop smiling.
Dewey.
Remember when we were both
stuck on the buoy and you said
you wanted to be a ventriloquist?
Well, I thought we could do it
together.
(MUMBLES) Thanks, Dad.
(MUMBLES) You're
welcome, son.
Oh, my God!
What is it?
It's Francis!
He quit school.
He's on his way to Alaska!
That's ridiculous.
He can't just leave school.
He needs our permission.
No,
he doesn't.
He got
himself legally emancipated.
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