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The autopsy allows others to see what one could never see himself. Maurice Ferrand
PIG AUTOPSY
Two years already...
Memory is a cancer ...
Even when it fades, it leaves marks,
scratches, 7 00:01:02,500 --> 00:01:06,150 small scars we hasten to turn into regrets.
Memory is like a ***,
Always ready to blow you, leaving you at best a little hopeful, at worst with a clap.
But most of the time, she'll only leave regrets behind.
Spend the rest of one’s time regretting is too wearing,
especially when we ignore what we regret the least.
One way or another, we always end up alone.
There are idiots who take a cat, or worse, a dog,
and there are some that even take more than one.
Other just behave like kids.
Better to be alone than deal with these creatures who are as ugly as they are useless.
In life, there are two kinds of fools,
those who win and those who count the score.
I am in none of those categories.
I am part of those who wait, without expectations...
less and less anyhow.
Two years... Two years already...
Two long years...
In losing you, I lost everything...
Would I be able to stop breathing,
collapse in a heap and keep on blocking the air?
I should try, just to see what happens...
Just to stop feeling.
***, I should become a vegetarian and drink soy milk,
and occasionally jerk off in a cabbage hoping that something unusual grows.
After that, I would put the fire,just to see...
Just like that ... Just to see what happens...
I miss you.
At times, it's like being on a boat in the middle of the ocean.
Except that my boat has been taking water for a while. It is sinking.
Dammed bunch of rotten planks...
You must do things to regret them...
They know everything better than everyone ... They believe they can think for me...
Still nothing, not even a poor temp job...
Hello madam ... yes ... I called you yesterday for the advertisement...
... yes, I'd like to know...
... yes ma’am...
... but I ... Yes ... ... Should I remind you in a few days? ...
It is always the same story...
Okay, understood...
THEY WILL SEE WHAT HAPPENS IN A FEW DAYS!
I'll lose my touch, I'm sure now.
I did everything as best I could, as it should make any difference...
I trusted them, but they fooled me ... they fired me!
I must stop thinking about it, it is useless...
I should perhaps spend the rest of my life hidden,
away from light and especially away from the shadows.
Wait and try to forget...
Memory is a cancer, but forgetfulness is not even a cure.
Forgetfulness is just another illusion...
We do not forget what is engraved in the flesh...
Drunkenness is still what suits me best...
Getting drunk to death, sleep like ***, hoping not to wake up...
In losing you, I lost everything...
What could I do? ... butchery, it is not like riding a bike, no...
It was necessary to train not to lose my touch...
During our 35 years of life together, you've always supported me...
At first, when you came up with the idea, I refused. That did not last long anyway...
And finally, it went well...
Some might say that I've sacrificed you.
In fact, you offered yourself. Offered to me, for me.
You came to me voluntarily. I accepted.
I did it properly, as carefully as I would have made love to you.
Meticulously
Professionally
In the end, I haven't lost my touch, my dear Clara...
But that was two years ago ... Two long years...
I'm coming my darling, I am almost there...