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The Legend of Melda -Part 2-
You've been playing that game for a year now
and you've just finished the first level?
And you've spent a lot longer being a ***
*** and nobody gives a ***, right?!
Dude...
*sigh*
forget it.
Well then, I'll get the hell out of here.
Sure, but you're still an illegal immgrant
and they're going to kick you out of here.
What?! Dude, c'mon!
I helped you! Don't be a ***!
Enough, shut up.
See, the only one who can do something
about immigration issues
is Princess Melda.
Go look for her at the castle
and show her the Green Tamarind-shaped stone.
Maybe she'll give you a hand.
What the ***!
He didn't give a crap and kicked me out of the forest.
It's just that you ARE an illegal immigrant.
And what the ***'s it to you? Why are you following me?
Meh, I am just chillin' around.
Good morning young elf!
Seriously... do all plants and animals
talk in this place?
I think so.
My name is Owl.
Nah... for reals?!
What events perform through thy existence my dear elf?
Ehm...
what?
Watup, ***?
Do you know where can I find
Princess Melda?
Absolutely!
I can take you to her, if you wish!
Grab my feet and let us fly towards the castle
furrowing the warm winds of the kingdom and...
How am I sure you won't kidnap me?
What?
23 minutes later...
*Laughs* What a ***.
Could it be...?
Stand upright, brave knight.
Expose thy face and...
AAAGGGH! NO!
Ah! Like, they told me he was going to be a handsome
blue-eyed blonde,
not a worthless yellow brat.
not a worthless yellow brat.
Aaaaagh...
Like, no.
I want to review the contract, now!
Are you Princess Melda?
But of course I am! Princess of all that you see.
Even you, stinky ghetto kid.
Look, girl. I was very happy
in my house, minding my own business
and suddenly this filthy fly comes to bug
the *** out of me with *** about the *** Talking Tree
and the future of the Universe and...
Shhh! Shut up and hide!
That man comes here every day from the IRS
to take Daddy's money.
He wants to keep the company to himself!
Like, NOT cool at all!
And why should I give a damn?
I'm going to look to my right now and...
Ooooh! I see you!
Oh ***! I think he saw me!
You are like, such an idiot!
Wait! You have the green tamarid-shaped stone!
Wait! You have the green tamarid-shaped stone!
Oh, yeah... the *** Talking Tree gave it to me
and told me to bring it here so you can help me
fix my documents.
Ah! Then you ARE the chosen one!
Now.
Like... gross!
Well, if you want me to fix your documents,
you'll have to help me stop that man from
getting his hands on Daddy's company.
How the Hell am I supposed to do that?
Daddy once told me
about a super cool power
which is conviniently hidden
in the temple next door.
To obtain it, it is necessary to gather
the Three Useless Stones.
That doesn't make...
ANY *** SENSE!
Well, of course nothing makes any sense to
an uneducated, third-world-country kid that has never showered.
Oh really!? You think so?
Well *** you!
The volcano people have one of the stones.
So what?
So go and find it, you idiot!
30 minutes later...
Watup wur you eetin', bro?
There's brisket, sirloin, tongue, guts,
rump, chuck, yo mum, I gett 'er, I touch 'er,
I do 'er,
*whistle*
I'll have sirloin.
Sirloin it is, bro.
Do you know where can I find
one of those Useless Stones?
I dunno but you can ask "Pickley Pear".
Who's Pickley Pear?
He's da hood masta
off the hook and all
yo mamas so fat ooooh off the heezy fo sheezy
he'll pop yo *** so hard!
He's the one who knows.
Hey, are you Pickley Pear?
That's meeh! Juz pimpin' mah ride, bro.
That's meeh! Juz pimpin' mah ride, bro.
He's just hitting a rock.
Your mom, ***! Your mom!
Who yo want me to murk?
*Pain*
What the *** is wrong with you?!
Das how we say hi 'round here.
That's ***.
What yo need the great Pickley Pear for?
Well I'm looking for...
I'm Pickley Pear.
Oooook?
I need to know...
They call me Pickley Pear.
...where's the stone...
'Cause I like Pickley Pears.
..that...
But I get constipated.
Ooooh! But when I discharge the wood
even tears start poppin' out real good.
Why can't monsters be in a men's club
looking at some naked girls?
Why does it always have to be a cave
full of hair, and spiders, and ***.
What the *** *** *** ***!
How the *** do they pretend I beat
a stupid 820 feet dragon
with a wooden sword?
Eh...?
What are you doing here?
Ehm... I'm here to...
kick your ***.
What?
Why do you people come here just to *** around?!
What did I do? I'm just a *** dinosaur that spends its time
sleeping and eating these horrible rocks
which by the way have caused some serious problems
to my pancreas.
There's always some retarded
*** wanting to start *** because...
*** you, sucker.
*Laughs* this is stupid.
Wow! Now tha wuz tight, bro!
DO YOU REALLY HAVE TO KICK THE *** OUT OF ME!?!?
DO YOU REALLY HAVE TO KICK THE *** OUT OF ME!?!?
Aaaah, relax man.
Take tha "***-shaped" Useless Stone.
Take tha "***-shaped" Useless Stone.
***...? Enough! I'm getting the *** out of here.
What a stupid game.
You're even more stupid
you little piece of ***...
Actually it was pretty stupid.