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Agent Bauer, please! You have to help me to find Penelope!
I'm so worried!!
Madame President, we know "Ludmilla Covacova" and "Toto the Italian" are treating her well,
we'll get her back for you.
But agent, how can you be sure?
Trust me, i'll bring your daughter home safe.
Bauer.
Madame President.
It's a honor to meet you.
It's a pleasure.
This is my team, Drago, Middle East, Favela.
It's a pleasure to meet you, welcome to my west union compound.
Excuse me, can i... can i take a picture? Please.
Sure.
Thank you.
I apologize President.
So as you know, the president's daughter, Penelope, has been kidnapped by Ludmila Covacova and Toto the Italian.
We know that Ludmila Covacova took Penelope to Europe.
We know that Toto the Italian didn't want to take her to Europe,
it's too dangerous for him there, he has too many enemies.
But right now, we know for sure that Ludmila and Penelope are in Europe.
How do you know all of this information?
Hey!! I'm the one asking questions. "How do you know this information" ?
Because Ludmila's right hand man is one of our undercover agent.
Who is he?
Hey!!! Questions, only me!
Who is he?
Agent "White"... "Snow White".
(Music playing "YMCA")
Is this guy "Larson Not Important" ?
Hey!!!! Don't you understand? I'm the one asking questions!!
"Is this guy Larson Not Important" ?
Yes, for many years, agent White has been close to Ludmila,
he knows everything about her.
But recently, her relationship with Toto the Italian has become closer and it's too dangerous.
It became too risky, Toto knows too many people.
It's not too dangerous for Penelope?
Come on!! I'm the one who asks questions! I'm tired of it. I'm gonna go away!
What was the question?
Anything can happen. That's why we have to save Penelope before Ludmila and Toto realise it.
Ok, so we will have to go to London tonight.
Yes, and with you, will go others secret agents.
Dog, i need a visa!
Shh!!
Yes, i will accompany you to London, and there, you'll meet 3 of my best agents.
"Victoria Secret Agents".
Where are we gonna meet the girls?
In London.
Hey! Are they single?
I thought you were gay!
Guys! The President!!
Tonight, we all go to London on "Air Force One",
we will meet at "San Francisco Air Force Base" at 11pm,
and....
don't be late!
Ok.
Ok.
Ok.
Ok.
And remember, one suitcase of 50 pounds and one hand bag,
any more than that, you pay!
It's a bad economy.
Hey Bauer! What about agent Garcia?
Agent Garcia...
is on their side.
Ludmila, (speaking Russian) we have guests.
Stop talking! Sit here please. Don't move!
Be nice!!
I told you if you work is gonna stress me out,
Stop lecturing me! I don't want to be nice! I've been flying all freaking day long! 10 hours, jetlag.
HEY !!!
This is not a soap opera.
Soap opera?!
Is this some kind of joke to you?
Why did you bring the little girl to London?!!
Those four freaking stupid spies almost caught me, i had to run around town and hide like a freaking rat !!!!
You know Europe is way too dangerous for me!!
Nobody told you to come here.
The little girl was my idea! Don't touch her again!
And where is "Not Important" ?
I don't know.
He's not answering the phone.
Where is Rosario?
Rosario is coming. He's afraid to fly, so he's coming by boat.
From San Francisco by boat?
Yeah, why?
Don't worry about Rosario. What do we do now?
First of all,
let me introduce you to my new guard.
This is Vladimir Covacov,
my brother.
Hmm, cute!
Nice to meet you.
(Speaking nonsense Russian)
Hmm, you'll have to forgive me, i don't speak Russian. What did he say?
"Nice to meet you".
This is "the bull",
he's from here, he knows every place.
What the *** are you looking at?
Where is the little girl?
Who the hell do you think you are? Asking all these questions,
coming to me, in this *** place? I'll *** rip your head off mate !!!
*** down your neck!! What the *** is wrong with you?
It was just a question.
It's not your *** business, mate!
No, you're wrong. It is my *** business.
Marilyn! Call Rosario!
Rosario is in Japan.
Japan?! Which way did he go?
Which way did you go?
That's why they call him "The Dumb"!
First of all, don't *** kiss me!
Second of all, you'll know about the girl when you need to *** know about the girl.
In the mean time, you stay in this *** room and you don't *** move!
Hmm! But you told me you'd take me to "Harrod's" to go shopping!
I'm getting tired of your girlfriend.
You want to go shopping?
For *** sake, all you need to do:
let the president know that the girl is fine, we'll negociate a meeting and it'll all be sorted.
Ok.
Nice to see you.
You want to try?
Why did you decide to stay with us?
And to go against the president?
Because i hate her.
Why?
I use to be her personnal bodyguard, but then,
because of a small mistake, i'm just her daughter's babysitter.
What was your small mistake?
Nothing so bad, i just killed all her family and friends.
How did you kill them?
It was at night, we were coming back home to the "White House",
we just came in, turned on the light, it was full of people screaming,
i didn't know, and i shot everyone.
But it was just a surprise for her birthday.
Ahhh, come on! It's not so bad.
I think the president is a little bit severe with you.
I just tried to defend her.
But she never understood.
You know what?
You're REALLY sexy!
Thank you.
You too.
So,
"Salute".
"Dog", Penelope and Garcia, they're in Hyde Park.
(Gun shot)
I will miss you.
"C'est la vie".
By boss.
You were a great agent.