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The Senior Management Team talks about a new Research Profiling Exercise.
Academic staff from all six colleges around London have to fill in a new form...
...for the Research Review for the University's submission to REF.
Instructions come directly from High Holborn.
Is the form any different from the previous forms?
Professor...
...the form...
The form is identical to all previous forms.
And they want it by the 26th of March.
Could all those who did not submit to the RAE leave the room now.
Bloody SMT!
Bloody stupid SMT!
They 're sitting in their glass offices in High Holborn...
...and they have no idea what we are going through.
Every month there is a new bloody form.
A new bloody report!
They always ask us to send this bloody information...
...as if they ever do anything with it!
Professor it is important for the REF.
***!
This is bloody ***!
Professor, it's part of the Research Review.
I can't believe you are such an idiot...
Nobody cares about research!
They 'll use it as an excuse...
...to get rid of the people they do not like again.
They have this bloody information already...
...I have sent them this bloody information 100 times.
Again and again!
What the hell do they do with it?
Why are they asking the same godamn questions...
...all the time?
First we had the RAE.
I thought: "OK, I will do all I can".
"All I can for the University".
But...
...why am I asked for the same stuff for...
...the Annual Centre assessment?
...and the Research Centre revalidation?
...and the bloody Services review?
They took a break to screw up LCC...
...and now they start all over again!
Why the hell do we have the Research Office and Research Online?
Don't cry Hannah, none of my papers are online either...
I suppose we could ask a junior Fellow...
...to copy the previous forms to the new one.
And...
...one of you...
...to cobble together a statement about impact...
...as a summary of all previous impact statements.
And hope they will not notice...