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Good evening! I'm John D. Mouser bringing you
this special news bulletin!
In the night of September 16 to September 17 a dramatic
accident happened on a firing range of the Austrian military.
A shell detonated about 3 meters off its target...
[off: mumble, mumble]
WHAT?! HOW? Are you serious???
Ladies and Gentleman: The shell was not off by
3 meters, but by well over 3 KILOMETERS - that is
about 2 miles. Bad news for the people of a nearby village,
as the shell detonated right in the middle of a street there.
The incident caused one casualty: a cat who was taking a nap
near a windowsill was hit by shrapnel. The damage was
substantial too. While it remains unclear as to exactly
why the gunner misfired, our news team has several
theories on that subject.
Gunner 1: I'm bored...
Gunner 2: I'm bored too...
Gunner 1: What shall we do?
Gunner 2: Idunno...
Gunner 1: Hmmm... OK, I got it! I DARE you to push that button!
Gunner 2: That one?
Gunner 1: Yes...
Gunner 2: OK.
*click* *BOOM*
Gunner 1: Over to the right...
Gunner 2: moving right...
Gunner 1: Now a bit more to the left...
Gunner 2: moving left... make up your mind please...
Both: Ooohhhh! *whistle*
*click* *BOOM!*
Gunner 1 [slur]: More to the right!
Gunner 2 [slur]: rriiiiight!
Gunner 1 [slur]: No, no! MY right!
Gunner 2 [slur]: riiight!
Gunner 1 [slur]: Oh, come on, get it right!
Gunner 2 [slur]: riiightt!
Gunner 1 [slur]: By the way, to you have fire?
Gunner 2 [slur]: Fiiiiire!
*click* *BOOM!*
Gunner 1: duh... what's with all those button-thingies?
Gunner 2: uh... idunno... let's try them!
*click* *whirr*
Gunner 1: Wheee!!! We're turning!
Gunner 2: Yay!!! Now try this one!
*click* *whirr*
Gunner 1: Uh! UP SHE GOES!
Gunner 2: Now me! What's this one here?
*click* *BOOM!*
Gunner 1: OK, up next in our exercise: aiming.
Gunner 2: Oh, who cares? Do you want me to take your picture?
Gunner 1: Sure! Where do you want me?
Gunner 2: Hmmm... How about you strike a pose in front
of the gun controls?
Gunner 1: Like this?
Gunner 2: Yes... but it's not heroic enough... Hmm...
I know! Put your foot on that thingy here...
Gunner 1: Like this?
*click* *BOOM!*
Umm... Well... Only time will tell what really happened.
Our condolences to the family of the cat who gave its life
for whatever it was the training shot was fired for.
This concludes this special news bulletin;
I'm John D. Mouser for PawPet News. Goodnight!