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Julian: Now, you were highly recommended by someone you were with
Julian: Who was that? Dave: Gill
Julian: Hello Gill, you must be thrilled
Julian: I can see a camera, do you want to take a picture? Come down and take a picture Gill. Gill: Our video
Gill: Carry on, carry on, video. Julian: Ready, pose.
Julian: Oh, that could be your christmas card, couldn't it!
Julian: Anyway, she said you were lovely and I,
I sense that you really are. I mean, who is Gill to you?
Dave: Umm, she's an ex friend we found
Julian: Is it just Gill or is there a whole party with you? Dave: I'm with my wife Julian: That wasn't said very friendly was it!
Julian: A little unnecessary!
Dave: and josh Julian: and josh, ah okay, and how long have you been married?
Dave: um, nearly 20 years
Julian: Really? Do you have any little ones?
Dave: Yeah, two
Julian: Children as well?!
Julian: Lovely, and tell everyone what particular supermarket your jeans come from. Dave: Weird Fish
Julian: What do you do for a living?
Dave: I'm a sales manager for a printing company and a driving instructor.
Julian: Oh a driving instructor!
Julian: I can imagine that photo doing the rounds!
Julian: you'll have so much to chat to your clients about!
Julian: Any interesting anecdotes about while driving instructing anybody? Dave: Ah, I can't possibly say. Julian: Oh really? You're too discrete.
Dave: I think you and I went to the same school though. Julian: No!
Dave: Apparently...
Julian: Sorry? Dave: Apparently
Julian: well, I went to St Benedicts, is that where you mean? Dave: No, Teddington?
Julian: Ah yes, I did go to a primary school in Teddington, which one did you go to?
Dave: I went to Teddington Boys actually Julian: Well I didn't go to Teddington Boys...
Julian: I did meet a few of them, though...
Julian: So you where completely wrong about that, Dave.
Julian: I do hope you and me are not going to fall out.
Dave: I just hope we're not going to get married!
Julian: With those shoes, its very unlikely, let's ask you some questions then
Julian: I want to fulfil your wildest *** dreams; who would you like me to dress up as?
Julian: Anyone at all, anybody you want for your fantasy..
Dave: that would have to be the wife...
Julian: well...
Julian: You can take that Philip Schoefield mask back to the joke shop then
Julian: I won't be needing it after all... take one step forward here
Julian: could you complete this song title, please: I'd like to teach the world to...
Dave: Boo me off and back to my seat
Julian: Very amusing but the answer was 'rim' Dave: I don't know what that is(!)
Julian: I'm sure your wife will enlighten you!
Julian: Now your practical challenge, take hold of that, I believe you are going to sing for us!
Julian: I'll just hold it here for you, that will be lovely. Nessun Dorma.
*music starts, garbled singing of Nessun Dorma*
*garbled singing of Nessun Dorma*