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TO BE READ ALOUD IN THE HOT TUB
My Fellow Bird Dogs,
It has been brought to my attention that my behavior at the 2012 Colorado Bird Dog Convention
may be cause for my lack of invitation in 2013 and the present year.
I beg for your ear for a moment, as I would like to address this situation.
First of all, I realize that it is was out of the utmost respect (see Jake Diner for
definition) and a great privilege that I was even invited to the 2012 convention and a
prior convention in the first place... and for this I am grateful. While I may kid myself
into thinking that I'm just one of the Bird Dogs like you, deep down (see Best Cry Ever
for definition) I know that I'm not and nor do I do deserve to be. Sadly, my unfortunate
actions at the 2012 convention are proof of this. No true Bird Dog would ever leave a
fellow Bird Dog like I did. For this... for my utterly disgraceful behavior... I am sorry.
Second, I would like to ask you for your forgiveness in this matter. I cannot change the past...
and I wish I could go back to that fateful night where I hid in the downstairs bedroom
and secretly booked a Jet Blue flight back home. If I could somehow turn back the clock
(see Topps baseball cards) and had the opportunity to do things over again I assure you that
things would be different.
Thinking back at my various vacations over the past several years, the first Colorado
Bird Dog Convention that I was fortunate enough to attend was like no bonding experience I
have experientationed (see Diego for definition). The laughs in the hot tub as Mikey questioned
Diego about the uselessness of a tablet... the endless rounds of sushi and saki at the
local bar... the delicious breakfast potatoes cooked by chef Pablo... the tears we shared
when we found out Joel lost his car keys... the laser kills we witnessed by David in Halo...
the memories go on and on. At the ski slopes, Diego cradling me in his arms while teaching
me how to snowboard... Paul coming back to help me after my binding broke on the traverse
to the bowls... Mikey flying by me at 100mph after I fell, and then turning around and
walking back up the slope to see if I was ok... David and I being the last ones to make
a run down one of the James Bond slopes at Breckenridge. With your camaraderie and care
for your fellow person, you showed me what being a true Bird Dog is all about... and
I let you down. My shameful behavior in 2012 was not representative of a true Bird Dog...
and I was rightly and justly stripped of that honor that I once held.
But doesn't even a true Bird Dog ever make a mistake? Isn't there ever a time when one
of you yourself had let a fellow Bird Dog down, only to be welcomed back with love,
care and tenderheartedness? YOU showed me what it means to be a Bird Dog... now I beg
you to show me what it means to take one of your fallen Bird Dogs back under your wings
and show him the way.
Even though we are several thousands of miles away in this moment, I feel like I am there
with you all. And while I surely don't deserve it, I am hoping for the chance... a slight
opportunity... to one day be with you all again at a future Colorado Bird Dog Convention.
Maybe you it will take time to earn your trust again, but if you find it in your hearts to
give me another chance and let me pay you back the respect and honor that is due to
you, I will not let you down.
Craigory