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Welcome to the Daily Slog news review
In our headlines, the Israeli cabinet has approved two hundred and sixty five
million shekels for an anti-obesity campaign based on the growing body of
obesity research. While the health ministry readied plans to import Indian
workers, support has surprisingly come from Peace Now which acknowledged that
Israeli obesity has become an existential threat, asking "How can all of us
fit within the '67 borders?"
In response to the one in four overweight recruits, the IDF has created
a unit specializing in terrain no higher than ten degrees incline, with the first
deployment to be in the Tel Aviv region.
In acknowledgment of the popular support for dieting, Channel 10 will be piloting
a reality show called "The Loser." In contention for hosting the will be Tzipi Livni
and Shimon Peres. Even Bank Hapoalim owner Sherry Arison has weighed in
with her slogan "Eat healthy, stay wellthy."
Opposition leader Tzippy Livni has branded the initiative "Another right wing
effort to get us to shut our mouths," and mainstream politicians on both the right
and left objected to new government's Obama_style ,nanny efforts. Whent asked if they'd
support it, they responded: "Fat chance." M K Ben Elier was also in the
news this week in connection with the Egyptian Elections as his service was
sought by many parties based on his ability to bring out the votes and
clans in the Arab sector.
In other news, intelligence sources believe that the mysterious explosion at
the Iranian nuclear facility this week was the result of a wayward
shell fired during this week's Tzehilim reserve exercise.
In response to the mysterious mishaps, Iran has begun checking their mezuzot
on all their centrifuges and army bases.
Western analysts also think that the Iranian effort is now being slowed by
a new computer viruses that repeatedly delays the beginning of services of the
atomic plants and goes by the name: "The Jerusalem light rail virus."
In other light rail news, the recent crash with an 86-year-old
pedestrian has been for the operators one further proof that this rail network:
"..works just like any other." Thanks for watching