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I am only here
Good, because if you think
this little trip of yours is gonna
send me scurrying back to France...
Taylor told me of your studies,
the series of articles you wrote.
You lied to make me look good-- I get that--
but I think part of you wishes it were true.
I think I should go.
Kirsten, I am so sorry.
That you've been running a prostitution ring
through our business?
What do you say I give you a call
when I leave here?
I think we should stay engaged.
I don't think that you can be with someone
until you can be with yourself.
Oh, that sounds like a...
I guess it's a no.
Dude, I asked the girl to marry me.
Yeah, and she said no.
It's not like she broke up with you.
That would have been better.
Someone says they don't want to marry you,
you're supposed to break up.
Now we got to keep on dating
like everything is normal,
when there's this gi-normous...
elephant in the room.
Yeah.
All right, look.
There's no elephant, and there's no breakup.
It's a breakup.
How else do you explain 17 unreturned phone calls?
Seventeen?
The first 12 were apologies
for that stupid lie
I told Henri about Ryan.
And after that, it was just kind of a blur.
Sooner or later, he has to call me back, right?
I'll call her when I'm ready.
What?
She lied to me about her French ex-husband.
And she also apologized.
Taylor doesn't respond well to neglect, man.
You should call her.
Yeah? Maybe you should call Summer.
(phone ringing)
Is that Seth?
Che.
I'll call him back.
He's flying here.
He was feeling weird Seth vibes.
All the way from Rhode Island?
Che transcends space and time.
(phone ringing)
Ryan?
No, Henri-Michel.
God, Frenchie's really putting on the full-court press, huh?
Yeah.
Nothing's happened yet, though.
I keep telling him I've got a boyfriend.
Even though, technically, I guess I don't anymore.
You know, I think Ryan's just waiting for Henri
to go back to the motherland.
She said in her message he's still in town.
Until he leaves, we can't have a real conversation.
I don't get it-- when is he leaving?
That's just it; he's not leaving.
He's renting a house in Newport,
and he asked me to move in with him.
What?
You're not considering it, are you?
It's just that I've been mooching
off of you and Julie for months now,
and I've lived with Henri-Michel before,
and he's really not a bad roommate, you know,
aside from his natural odor and-- I don't know--
maybe I can force myself to fall in love with him.
Why would you want to do that?
Because I'm going to need some help getting over Ryan.
They're going to call.
Maybe we should call.
TAYLOR: They're going to call.
Right?
(piano and acoustic guitar strumming gentle melody)
♪ California, here we come ♪
♪ Right back where we started from ♪
♪ California... California... ♪
Atwood.
Hey, look,
I'm sorry to bother you at work,
but I just really needed to talk to you.
No.
Are you sure? It's really good.
How's Seth?
See, I kind of turned down his proposal
and never heard from him again.
Proposal?
That's the first time I'm hearing about it.
Right. For a week now, Seth has been off the map.
You expect me to believe that not once
did he mention anything about a proposal going awry?
Right, well, he had pinkeye.
Mm-hmm.
Uh-huh. Did you have pinkeye, too?
What? Why?
Well, 'cause Taylor said she didn't hear
from you, either, and she was asking about you.
Well, see, that was 'cause I was,
I was helping him with his recovery.
And waiting for Henri-Michel to leave.
Actually, I don't really mean to be the bearer of bad news,
but he's looking for a house to rent in Newport.
(sighs): Great.
Summer?
Hey, Che, what are you doing here?
Tai Chi.
The soft and pliable will destroy the hard and strong.
I guess I meant what are you doing in Summer's living room?
I'm here for you.
Fig? Did you know that figs
are nature's biological response modifiers?
And since I know that you're ailing spiritually...
What?
Come on, man, you can't lie to me.
I can see your aura.
Besides, Summer told me she rejected your proposal.
Oh.
Well...
When she hadn't heard from you for a couple days,
Yeah. No, that was just my sciatica acting up.
Seth, you put something
out into the universe, and you didn't get it back.
I mean, I really can't imagine what a blow
that must have been to your male animus.
You've been emasculated.
My masculinity is intact.
Look, you and Summer revealed my hypocrisy, man.
You saved me, so I hear that you're hurting,
I just want to come and try to save you.
Thank you, but, you know, I'm good.
I'm very good.
(clears throat)
Hey.
Summer. Hi.
Your pinkeye is all clear.
Yeah.
The reason why I haven't heard from you.
I talked to Ryan.
It was his sciatica.
Yeah, when it gets in your eye, it goes, it goes pink.
I'm great.
Are you?
Good.
'Cause I missed you.
Tonight, we are going to have a date.
Hey, a date sounds
A romantic date.
Aren't they all, Summer? Aren't they all?
High fives all around.
High fives... all around.
Seriously, I'm good.
I'll see you tonight for this date.
Uh, perhaps I was wrong.
Seth is actually stronger than we thought.
I wouldn't leave town just yet.
Hmm. There's lots of closet space.
Plenty of room for your pants.
Each pair could have its own walk-in.
(sighs)
What is this American obsession with closets?
It's a capitalist conspiracy
to hide what you own so you will buy more?
Or does it have to do with sex?
Henri, are you sure you really want to move here?
I will do whatever it takes to win back your love, Peaches.
You see, that is very brave of you.
You're really putting yourself out there.
You're really taking an emotional risk.
Unlike some people.
Still have not heard from Ryan?
No, and you would think
that he would at least have the decency to dump me on the phone.
But it's fine, though.
I'm fine, because Ryan and I
were never really going to work, anyway.
He doesn't even like cheese.
Oh. I must admit, I feel for him.
I know the excruciating pain of living without you.
And a life without cheese, well...
You know, it's probably good
that you came back when you did,
before Ryan and I got any more serious.
I know it is good for me. Hmm.
Je t'aime, Peaches.
Oh, no, no.
Henri, you don't have to say that.
But I love to say that, because it is the truth.
I will say it a thousand times, if you like.
Wow.
That's, uh-- okay, yeah, say it a thousand times.
I love you, un. I love you, deux.
I love you trois.
Look, I got my first non-cheating A.
Your tutoring is really paying off.
WILL: Kind of weird,
since we barely studied last night.
Yeah, I guess you can learn chemistry from making out.
Who knew?
I actually did some studying after you left.
I guess your work ethic is kind of contagious.
Let's see what else I can catch.
Um, why is this girl staring at me?
(mumbling): I don't know.
Hi, Will.
Your solo at practice this morning
was so amazing.
Thanks.
Um, Lucy, this is Kaitlin.
Kaitlin, this is Lucy. She's in band with me.
No kidding.
You still in for Friday night?
Yeah, sure, I'll be there.
Great, I can't wait.
What's Friday night?
We're having a bake sale
in the student lounge,
to raise money for new uniforms.
Will and I are manning the Rice Krispy treats table.
See you later, Will.
I'm going to go practice my scales.
All right.
You should come; it'll be fun.
Band geeks and baking goods.
Definitely sounds like the feel-good hit of the year.
Well, maybe we can do something after.
Well, I do have a Latin test coming up.
Maybe you can help me study.
All right. Um, well, I guess I'll see you a little later.
(phone ringing)
New Match.
Hi, Kiki, don't hang up.
You turn our business into a prostitution ring,
and you get hung up on-- company policy.
(phone ringing)
New Match.
Did you at least get my cookie bouquet?
No, you're not.
Then I'm allergic to you.
Just tell me how long you're gonna be mad at me about this.
You're kidding, right?
Kirsten, our friendship
can't just end like this.
There must be something I can do.
If you'll excuse me, I have a legitimate business to run
that doesn't involve hookers.
(sighs)
Ryan.
Finally.
You know, she's been
asking about you every day this week.
I'm here now.
She's not.
Try the Four Seasons.
Where her French ex-husband is staying?
(sighs)
All right, I guess I can head over there.
Huh?
Don't tell me you came with no gift.
I don't need a gift.
Ryan, Pepé Le Pew is buying her a house.
She's moving in with him?
You honestly got her nothing?
I mean, you couldn't have gone to the Quickie Mart
to get her a stuffed animal
and some gummy bears?
Gummy bears.
Talk is cheap, Ryan.
If you're going toe-to-toe with this Frenchie,
you're going to need to step your game up.
I can't believe I'm getting advice from a 15-year-old.
A 15-year-old who's right.
Uh, yeah.
You saved some money on gas.
Ryan lent me some videogames.
There's Thai takeout
and some of your favorite whiny records.
SETH: Mm...
And...
I still really love you.
But, I hope we get married someday,
I'm just not ready now.
Hey, forget the whole thing ever happened. I know I have.
I don't want to forget about it.
What you did was amazing.
It was so sweet.
The words you said
and how sincere you were when you said them.
Uh...
And the glow-in-the-dark ring, it was so cute.
Yeah, it's so hot in here.
Yeah, that's a good thing.
No, I, I think the...
air conditioning is broken
It's winter.
I'm going to go get a glass of water.
No.
Seth.
Hey, Che.
Seth. Hey.
Not good, I know.
So, the thing you said
about my animus...
I was right, wasn't I?
See, 'cause the flesh can lie
but the aura never does.
It's been eating at you, little buddy, I can tell.
And you can fix me?
That's what I do.
Tomorrow morning, we're going to let the healing begin.
Hey, Seth, it's me.
Just calling to see how you're feeling.
Hope that crazy 24-hour flu thing cleared up.
And, uh...
also I don't believe that you have the flu. Okay, bye.
CHE'S VOICE: Dear Caterpillar,
Last night, Seth came to me for help.
I'm taking him to the forest.
He needs to pick up the sword and embrace his inner warrior.
Only by running with the wolves
shall he learn to walk like a man.
Are you sure I don't need to bring my phone?
It's got GPS. What if we get lost?
No, you don't need anything.
What about a jacket? What if it's cold?
All we need is my harmonica-- got it--
your broken spirit and these giant backpacks.
(playing harmonica)
I will help your soul mate find himself.
But where are you, Summer Bear?
Where is the Iron Butterfly who once inspired me so?
As we had into the trees,
perhaps you need to find your own path.
Peace and Love, Che.
Oh, Crap.
(knocking)
Ryan.
Entrée.
So, you are here to beat me up.
I warn you-- my family
is hemophilic; I will bleed.
I'm actually looking for Taylor.
Kaitlin told me she was hanging out here.
But if she's not around...
I was kidding.
You are welcome.
Can I get you some coffee?
It tastes like urine,
but apparently that is how you Americans drink it.
You mind me asking when she's gonna be back?
Ah, she is shopping for furniture.
We move in to our new house on Monday.
Monday?
All right, well, look.
If you could just, um, tell her I stopped by.
Stop.
What is that in your hand?
Uh? Oh...
It's noth... it's stupid.
It's not stupid.
It's a teddy bear.
Oh...
what is in his mug?
Gummy bears.
Ah, how amusing.
It is for Taylor?
Yeah.
Well, I will deliver it to her.
It's a tad juvenile,
but it is from the heart and that is what matters.
You know what? No, it's fine.
Stop being modest.
I'm not afraid of a little competition, Ryan.
It is more fulfilling
if Taylor chooses me in spite of you wanting her back.
Well, that's comforting.
Now, I feel a poem coming.
All right.
(phone ringing)
Hello?
Hey, Kirsten, it's Spencer. Is Julie there?
She doesn't work here anymore, Spencer.
You should call her at home.
I can't, I'm in Mexico about to get on a boat.
But we have a problem.
What problem could we possibly have?
One of my boys, Chaz, called me last night and, uh,
turns out he has chlamydia.
What?
Yeah, so you're probably gonna want
to call and tell everyone he slept with.
I most certainly will not.
It's up to you and Julie.
Hey, I'm out of the country.
And, you know, you just told me
that Julie doesn't work there anymore,
so... good luck.
Julie has the list. Bye.
Yeah.
I've been looking for you.
Oh, hi, friend of Will's.
Nice hat.
Listen, ***.
What'd you just call me?
If you show up at our bake sale tonight, I'll kick your face in.
I'd definitely like to see that happen.
I happen to be a brown belt in Tai Kwon Do.
I happen to be going to second with the guy that you like.
Go.
Now. Before the Munchkins ask for their mayor back.
If we see your face tomorrow,
you will regret it.
What, you going to blow
your little trumpet at me until I cry?
You know,
I was thinking about doing something fun tomorrow night.
But now I think I will go to your little geek fest
and buy some brownies.
Bonjour.
I am exhausted.
If I have to look at one more mid-Century sofa,
I'm going to kill somebody.
Well, you should have a nap.
Perhaps we both should.
Yeah, it's just, you know,
I saw this special on hotel rooms,
and they search them with UV lights
and, gah, you don't want to know.
Oh, you Americans and your germs.
By the way, Ryan...
brought this for you today.
He is not a classic romantic to be sure, but, uh,
the bear has a sweet smile, hmm?
It must make you feel something.
Touched? Nostalgic?
You know what this makes me feel?
This makes me
feel...
nothing.
Now tell me again why you love me.
But then I would have nothing left
for my poetry reading tomorrow.
(cell phone ringing)
Mm...
(gasps)
Kiki, you're calling me.
I'm delivering a message.
Spencer called.
It seems that one of your ***, Chaz, has chlamydia.
Chlamydia, ooh, that's rough.
Well, all the women that this guy slept with
is going to have to be informed.
Spencer says you have a list.
Yes, of course. I'll drop it off tomorrow.
Drop it off?
Julie, I am not doing this.
You're going to have to tell them.
Well, Kirsten, I'd love to,
but I kind of don't work at New Match anymore.
Oh, no, no, no.
You are not making this my responsibility.
How about a compromise?
I'm listening.
I'm not facing those women.
I'll do the talking, you drive.
And how come you can't drive?
Oh, I'm sorry, do you want to do the talking?
It was our company.
You're liable.
I'll pick you up in the morning.
I'll find my little black book.
(sighs)
Come on, Taylor, I need you to come over.
Because I am making dinner.
A gourmet dinner.
Mm-hmm.
And I know you, more than anyone, appreciate fine food.
What am I making?
I am making quail and some caviar.
Maybe even a soufflé.
That is not over my head, okay?
For your information, I recently made a brisket
and it was delightful.
Okay, great, I will see you soon.
Bye.
So she's coming.
Now you're going to tell me why
I just had to lie to my friend?
Uh, because I need to see her.
Because?
I need to tell her how I feel.
Mm-hmm.
What?
Nothing.
You just don't really strike me as the coffee cart type.
And what does that mean?
Look, I'm sure you have changed--
being with Taylor made you more expressive--
but articulating your feelings
to your girlfriend, kind of a challenge.
Yeah, but if I don't make some sort of declaration...
You might lose her.
Okay, you just need to take a deep breath,
look inside and say what's from your heart.
Good.
Yeah?
Taylor has a super big heart, and she's super forgiving,
but, uh, there is a French guy
circling like a great white shark.
Okay, you're just reminding me of the stakes.
No. I'm giving you advice because you're my friend
and I really want you to work this out.
All right, I'm listening, I'm listening.
Do not choke.
Okay, I wasn't going to until you did that.
You kind of have a wide neck.
Yeah, you got really small hands. Thanks for the advice.
No problem.
SETH: Are we almost there yet?
CHE: Why is everything a destination?
Do the fish care where they swim each day?
Uh, actually, I think they do.
You still haven't told me what we're doing here.
Seth, relax.
Smell the trees.
Let the oxygen clean your blood.
Boy, I sure feel better.
Can we go back now?
We've been hiking for hours.
I'm exhausted and I'm starving and my *** is cramping up.
Let's get to the top of the hill.
We're going to sing a song to the sunset...
And then we can go home?
No. I think it's time I told you.
What?
See, when a baby is born,
an animal spirit enters the child in order
to guide and protect him on his journey.
Somehow Summer's rejection
caused your spirit animal to get sick.
In order to contact your animal,
you must learn to live like him.
To spend the night in the forest.
Ah, we're here, Seth.
We've reached the sacred spot.
Now, we got to build a sweat lodge.
Che, look at me. We're not staying here.
Where's the car?
The car is six hours away.
I mean, if we could even find it in the dark.
We have no choice but to stay here until tomorrow.
Go grab some willow branches.
I brought hides--
buffalo, elk.
Willow branches-- you know what willow looks like?
TAYLOR: Summer!
Summer, where are you?
Summer?
God, you call someone, the least you can do is show up...
Ryan, what are you doing here?
I had Summer call you. I'm sorry. I wanted to talk to you.
Well, it worked, weasel.
What do you want?
I wanted to apologize. I made a mistake.
When? When you abandoned me
on the set of a French talk show?
Or when you didn't call me for a week?
All of the above?
Well, you hurt me, Ryan.
Why couldn't you
just have had faith in us?
I don't know, I guess I thought we were too different.
Maybe you were right.
No, I know I wasn't.
And I realize now that how we feel is much more important
than what we have to talk about.
And how do you feel?
(clears throat)
I...
I...
That stuffed animal that you bought me
is more expressive, Ryan.
Henri-Michel is reading a poem
that he wrote for me at the bookstore tomorrow night.
♪It's a love poem, Ryan, and it's long.
Hey, no snoozing, man.
You drift off to dreamland now, this whole thing is for naught.
You know, the Australian
aboriginals believed...
Shut up, Che.
Little cranky today, are we?
I'm deranged.
I haven't been to sleep, I haven't eaten.
Hey, I got to break you down before we build you back up.
Now go gather rocks.
Bye.
All done. She took it pretty well.
Excuse me.
Hi.
Hi. I'm really sorry to have to tell you this.
One of Julie's boys...
Julie will pay for all the medical costs.
What kind of unclean operation are you people running?
You'll be hearing from my lawyer.
Look, I understand that you're really upset,
but I don't think you want to take this to court.
The publicity alone...
Don't look at me.
Just...
Oh, my God.
That was brilliant.
You had to do one thing.
I choked, I'm sorry.
I promise, next person I really will tell.
Or we could get our nails done.
Oh, okay.
So what do Brutus, Judas, Benedict Arnold,
Julius Rosenberg, Ethel Rosenberg,
although that's debatable,
Uh, we all did what we thought was right.
Eyes rolling.
I'm sorry about yesterday, okay?
But Ryan looked like a poor, sad koala bear,
and I'm trying to help animals.
Yeah, why does your room look like a bird cage?
Because I decided its time to get off my butt
and do something with my life.
I'm going to start a nonprofit.
You know, I read that if you can just focus on saving one animal,
you can really make an impact.
Did you read this article?
It's how we're giving elephants post-traumatic stress disorder.
Those poor elephants.
All they want is to be cared for and nurtured
and not left on the set
of a European talk show
after party by their stupid, stupid...
Yeah.
And speaking of stupid, did you see
the total Quickie Mart teddy bear that he brought me?
Ryan bought you a stuffed animal?
Oh, my God.
Look, in all the time I've known him,
I've never seen him do anything so sweet.
Never?
Never.
That's probably the nicest gift he's ever given.
Oh.
I, uh,
I should go.
Hey.
Hey.
You going for a run?
Yeah, I'm just trying to clear my head.
Yeah, I saw that your light was on pretty late last night.
Yeah.
Yeah, I was trying to think of a good gift for Taylor.
Oh, so what did you come up with?
Yeah?
They had a special on a bear with a mug of candy.
So you didn't quite hit it out of the park, did you?
I may have done more harm than good.
You know, it is obvious to almost everyone
that Taylor feels very strongly about you.
Well, Henri-Michel said he loved her.
He wrote her a book and he's performing some poem about it.
And then she asked me if I felt the same...
You couldn't say anything.
Between us,
how do you feel about her?
Well, being with Taylor's like
being on a roller coaster.
And that's what, unsettling?
For a guy who's afraid of heights,
it's not exactly the best fit, but, uh...
I don't know, it's exciting I guess.
Tell her that, before it's too late.
Tell her that.
Hmm?
A situation like this,
you could do something, you could do nothing.
It's as simple as that.
All right.
Do something.
Yeah, see you around.
A mug!
Hi, you're home.
What are you doing with the refuse?
I was making sure that the maid service here is efficient.
Or looking for Ryan's mug of stale candy and bear
that holds a balloon?
Well, the guy did get me a gift,
and the balloon was really shiny.
Peaches, there is no shame in wanting to keep a gift
that was bought for you by a lover.
Really?
It makes one feel special to know that they were adored.
Well, I don't know if I would use the word adored exactly.
But the problem lies in whether you are wanting a memento,
or wanting Ryan.
I want to be with somebody who really wants to be with me,
and who's not afraid to say it.
Well, in that case, you better tape your socks down,
because my poem is going to knock them right off.
I must dress.
Okay.
Yeah, the rocks are hot.
So now we got to get them all moist and sweaty.
Then we can sleep?
As soon as you shovel these rocks into the tent.
Unless you're too weak from hunger.
No, I um, actually, I found some berries down below.
They were pretty tasty, so...
You ate the berries?
Yeah, why? Is that a problem?
(chuckles)
No, dude, it's no problem.
Not yet.
This is all I could use at the time.
I didn't have anything else.
Hey, guys.
Oh, Kaitlin, glad you made it.
Will was just telling me a story
about how he lost his drumsticks.
But luckily he had
Chinese that night
so he used his chopsticks.
Okay, well, that's definitely a knee-slapper.
Will, do you mind
getting me a soda?
Sure. You want to come?
All right.
Just so you have it clear--
the only reason I'm here is because
I know you don't want me to be.
So get ready to have some fun.
Oh, I'm having fun.
Lots of fun.
You're in our world now.
And girls like you aren't welcome here.
Girls like me.
What, girls who don't like wearing polyester pantsuits
or baking pies or wearing
lame feathered hats?
Everything okay?
Not really.
Kaitlin just insulted our uniforms
and called our hats lame.
Actually, they kind of are.
I have to go to the bathroom.
(drum beating)
(both rhythmically chanting)
(singing chant)
How are you feeling, friend?
Like I'm sharing a sauna with Blue Man Group.
Go with it.
You're in the spirit world, man.
This is the very last part of your journey.
Ryan likes Journey.
Soft of eye, light of touch, speak little,
listen much.
(echoing): Dad?
Mom?
Che?
(water running, birds singing)
Che?
(howling)
I'm scared.
Oh, I guess that's the idea.
Is that you making all that noise?
I can hear you.
What's that, little fella? You don't feel well?
That's okay, I can take care of you.
I don't exactly know what that means, but maybe, maybe
I can get you back in the ocean
with all your otter friends.
And you can do otter-related activities.
Don't worry.
I'm here. It's going to be okay.
(both chattering)
Whoa.
Oh, Che.
Che, wake up.
I had the greatest dream.
Me, too, man.
And I just healed my animal spirit.
I've got to get back home to Summer.
Mazel tov, brother, what an amazing accomplishment.
Well, tell me about your spirit animal.
Oh, it was so cute, man.
It was this otter,
and it was lost.
An otter?
Yeah, why is that okay?
Yes.
Is that bad?
No, I mean, it's amazing.
Good.
Great, because I thought, like,
it would suck if it wasn't. But we should get out of here.
(women swooning)
"The tree from whence she fell is blessed.
"He held her for the world to see,
"but now to my deep distress,
"my little peach...
is holding me."
(sighing and applause)
I would give anything,
anything for a man to write a poem
like that for me.
That was simply...
wow.
Um, if you'd care to stay, and who wouldn't,
the author will be signing
copies of his book, A Season For Peaches.
Wait.
Ryan, what are you doing?
I have a poem, too.
Young man, this is not karaoke.
You don't get a turn. Get down from
there before I call security.
Let's hear what the boy has to say, hmm?
We should not deny him
the opportunity to bear his soul in front of all these people.
Thank you.
"A sonnet...
"I don't know how to write.
"A haiku,
"Five, seven, five,
Seems... too tight."
I'm sorry, I think this is a bad idea.
Wait, wait.
Wait.
"Then there are three little words I'm not able to say.
"But Taylor, this is what I can tell you today.
"Though I can't say those words to you tonight,
please stick with me, 'cause I feel someday I might."
(swooning)
WOMAN: That's not
too bad.
Now, uh,
Monsieur de Momourant will be signing copies
in the, um, um... Monsieur?
Monsieur?
Look, uh, Taylor,
I know that my poem might not be quite as good as Henri-Michel's,
but I wanted you to know how I feel.
No, Ryan, I loved it.
Where is he?
He was just here.
I'm sorry.
JULIE: We had a good day.
Three out of five women now know they've been exposed
to a sexually-transmitted disease, we should be proud.
You're on your own for the next two.
Okay, I understand.
Aren't you supposed to be in Mexico?
Julie made me do it.
So you mean...
Yeah, so no one has...
You know.
What?!
Yeah.
I'm going to go.
Kirsten, I'm sorry.
It was the only way I could think
to get you to spend the day with me.
So you told all those women they have chlamydia when they don't?
They might. They did have sex with male hookers.
Plus, I picked the five meanest women in Newport.
What is wrong with you?
I was desperate. I missed you.
I hate not having you in my life, Kirsten.
I can live without you as my business partner,
but not without you as my friend.
You are going to call all those women tomorrow,
and you are going to tell them the truth.
Okay, but not Linda.
Please let Linda think she has an STD.
That is not only unethical, it is just plain mean.
I disagree. Do you want to debate about it over dinner?
You know you miss me.
Come on, say yes.
Kirsten?
You know, you been in here for so long
I was afraid you got flushed down.
Go away.
Hi.
Go away. I hate you.
Look, I'm sorry that Will doesn't like you back,
but I didn't do anything.
I have loved Will
since the day he transferred here.
I lent him a pen.
And he is the most wonderful,
sensitive, sweet...
And you don't even appreciate him.
Yes, I do.
I mean, he's smart and he's hot and he's an excellent kisser.
Then why do you make fun of the things that make Will Will?
His band uniform and his love of marching and baking
and his friends?
Because that's just what I do.
I mean, I make fun of everyone,
usually 'cause I'm high.
You make him not want to be himself.
You don't know what you're talking about.
Oh, that's the best you can do?
You know I'm right.
Shut up, okay?
Just shut up.
(laughter)
Henri?
Henri?
(Henri's voice speaking French)
"I love you, but I love love more.
(Henri's voice speaking French)
"And I don't want to be alone in it.
Au revoir, Peaches.
Hey, I've been worried about you.
You okay?
Oh, I'm okay.
It's a long story.
Well, I can't wait to hear it. When are you coming home?
Soon.
I'm having dinner with Julie.
Yeah.
She is the most manipulative, scheming partner in the world,
and it was stupid ever to get into business
with her, and I'll never make that mistake again.
But she's the best friend you got.
Something like that.
WILL: I was thinking maybe tomorrow we could do something
you might want to do.
Well, I thought tomorrow was night two
of your dorked-out bake sale.
I mean, it is, but they can hold it down.
I mean, I'd rather spend time with you.
I thought it was important to you.
If you want me to do it, I'll do it.
I'll go. I can go.
I just thought, you know,
that they wouldn't know what to do without you.
Since you're the king of dorks and all.
Excuse me?
Well, after observing you
in your natural environment,
it was just clear, we're not a good fit.
We're like oil and that other thing.
But I thought you liked that.
You know who else is a dork is that Lucy chick.
I mean, she's got a pretty hot bod for a dork.
I mean, if I was a dork like you, I'd totally go for her.
Real nice.
You know what, I think you're right.
Good, 'cause I think Brad and Eric
are down there, probably night surfing or something.
So I'll see you around.
Nah.
Che, what are you still doing here?
I had a dream. In my dream,
my spirit animal was a frog and I was in a stream.
I had the most magical day.
Oh, God, we've got to change the locks.
(gasps)
Whoa, hi.
I healed my spirit animal and I'm ready to love again.
Did you say spirit animal?
Yeah, and it was lost, but through my connection
to the ancient rituals of the Earth,
I was able to save my inner otter.
CHE: I swam
and I splashed.
And for the first time, I felt whole.
I had found my other half.
And it was an otter.
Otters are so cute.
Oh, my gosh, their whiskers and how they
use their belly to crack open their abalone dinner.
I am going to start a foundation to save the sea otters.
Do you know there are less than 3,000 left in California?
No, that's really sad.
You found love with an otter?
I'm happy for you.
I know it sounds crazy, but dreams don't lie.
Now I just have to explain it to the otter.
What?
Do you think the otters could wait till tomorrow?
No.
Hey.
Hi.
Henri-Michel's gone.
He's gone? Gone where?
Back to France, I guess.
Why?
Uh, I think he understood even better than I did
that as much as he loved me, I didn't love him,
and I probably never will.
Does that mean...?
When Henri-Michel would tell me he loved me,
it was like the whole world melted away.
Those words just have more power over me than anything.
It's scary how much I want,
how much I need to hear them.
Well, if that's important to you...
I would never ask you to be able to say that yet.
And even if you could, I don't think I'm ready to hear it.
So what are you saying?
Until I can be stronger on my own,
I don't think that I should be with anyone,
including you.
I'm sorry.
Okay.
Uh...
Actually, that makes sense.
But I'm going to treasure this poem forever.
I meant it.
Just so you know.
I do.
Bye, Ryan.