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Welcome to St. Petersburg, Russia…A city so filled with ice, lice and mice that they
had to rename it twice.
…Petrograd…Leningrad…oh, never mind. So anyway our story begins in the 19th Century
St. Petersburg, an oppressive and dark capital city,
where bureaucrats scurried through the dank and dreary streets trying to avoid the bitter
cold wind and where everyone drank some form of alcohol to keep the brutal reality of their
dead-end lives at bay.
Our central character is a sad, little man named Akaky Akakievich, who works as a copy
clerk in the billing department of The Northern Bee newspaper. When and how he entered the
department, and who appointed him, no one could remember. No matter how much the staff
changed, Akaky was always to be seen at the same desk, with the same attitude in the same
occupation...
Ah, there he is, Akaky Akakievich, hard at work already.
What would The Northern Bee be without he?
Look, Ivana, he hasn’t even taken off his old overcoat yet.
It’s so thin he probably doesn’t even feel it on.
It’s going to fall off his back from rot before he buys a new one.
Good morning, Akaky Akakievich.
Good morning, Ivan Nikiforvich.
Good morning, Akaky Akakievich.
Good morning, Ivana Ivanovich.
Is the head clerk in yet?
Andrei Yefimich is not here yet.
What about the editor?
He’s not here yet either.
Good. Neither are we.
Copying advertisements already, Akaky?
Sure, he is. He enjoys making us look slow and lazy.
Why don’t you take a break with us, Akaky?
Hello there? Are you a little cold this morning, Akaky?
What did you say?
You’re still wearing your overcoat.
Oh, goodness! I forgot to take it off.
Let me help you.
Looking a little down today, Akaky. Did your landlady beat
you up again?
When’s the wedding, Akaky?
Leave me alone.
When he gets a new overcoat!
Why must you both torment me so?
Who is tormenting you, Akaky Akakievich?
Good morning, Andrei Yefimich.
Good morning, Ivana Ivanovich.
Good morning, Andrei Yefimich.
Good morning, Ivan Nikiforovich.
Good morning, Andrei Yefimich.
Good morning, Akaky. Now, who is tormenting you?
My landlady, sir.
It’s true. She beats him with a board like you would a dog.
Is this true, Akaky?
On occasion. When she’s had more than a drop to drink and she finds herself in an
amorous mood, she sees fit to call on me. She lets herself in. Of course, I refuse her
propositions and that’s when the trouble begins...
When the beatings begin.
Really, how astonishing! How do you get rid of her? Did you threaten to alert the authorities?
Oh, no, sir. I find the authorities in most cases are absolutely useless. No, I threaten
her with public humiliation.
Very good. Of course, she knows you work for The Northern Bee.
Yes.
By the way, Akaky, are you still taking work home with you?
Most evenings, yes, sir.
Very good, very good. I’ve been speaking to the editor about your dedication. Perhaps
you’ll be getting a promotion and more important responsibilities in the near future.
Oh, no thank you, Andrei Yefimich. I’m quite happy with what I’m doing right now.
But you’ve been doing it for years. Wouldn’t you like to try something new for a change?
I am happy copying ads.
But Akaky, you would get paid more money and well, you could use it, I think. Your overcoat,
for instance, is a disgrace.
We were just telling Akaky that ourselves, sir.
Please, sir, I don’t think I could handle learning how to do anything new.
Very well, Akaky, if you don’t wish a promotion...About the overcoat. The editor mentioned its ghastly
condition. Perhaps you could do something about it to make yourself more presentable.
Oh, I see. Yes, I will try.
Very good.