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Economy's s___t and he's down in the dirt. He's just a worm
Lookin' for work. Life's too short to be down all the
Time. With mud, soil and dirt all in his mind. He's gotta get composted
And get on his grind. Sometimes great things are hard to find. All
We need is family and friends. 'Cause that's the only thing that's going
To be there in the end. Sometimes life sucks, but it could worse. With his
Lifestyle girls never want to flirt. Livin' in the hole in the crust of the
Earth. Forget about it - it's just Burt.
(opening music)
(opening music)
(yawns) (lips smacking)
(lips smacking)
Hmm? *Gasps *
Uh-huh.
Uh-huh.
(grunts)
(gags)
(gags)
(gags) (spitting) Ow, (inhale through teeth)
What the? Oh, it's you.
Hey Burt. (pops)
Well, what're you doing here Uri?
They said I wasn't aloud to go back, because I was sleeping too hard.
(snoring)
Hello, this is God. And I'm here to warn you about
impending dangers in your near future. The
choices you will make will drain you of all of your
dignity. For example, the next time you *** you will be
caught. And not only will you be caught, they
won't even leave the room right away. You'll have to
experience that moment forever!
That's nice. I'll tell you what Uri.
Carlos is gonna hang out with you today so I can find a job. *phone ringing *
Burt. (phone rings)
But - but, Burt. Burt. Hold On!
Hey Carlos. Will you do me a favor?
Burt, Burt, Burt, Burt, Burt....Burt! (interrupting) No, no, no it's not that. Uri, shut up!
And don't embarrass yourself in front of Carlos. I have to make a stop at the
grocery store too.
*bike horn * Burto, bueno!
Carlos! Yeah this is Uri, my brother.
Say "hi" Uri. Uri.
Anyways, Carlos. I need you to keep him company while I look for a job. Don't worry,
He's easy to watch. No problemo, Burto. I can do this.
Well, I'm off. Have fun you two.
*slithering *
I'm a lot more good looking and slippier than he is.
*ninja war cries *
*ninja war cries *
*munching *
*munching *
*munching *
*impact *
(giggles)
(giggles) *spitting *
(laughs) *food dripping *
(laughs) 'Kay, we're done here.
(laughs)
Okay, we're done here.
*munching * I'll be right back, holmes. (background)
*car music blaring *
*car music blaring *
*snoring * *door opens *
*snoring * *door closes *
Hey Carlos, how ya doin' kid?
Bueno, Senor Al! ...What?
Hey you don't look too good Al. Are you sick? Nah.
Your uncle Al's just a little hung. I got to stay in this position.
*moans * Just these two things mi amigo.
...What? I can't understand ya. What? Just these two things mi amigo!
What? What'd you say? Just the - Just these things man.
Oh - Yeah, no problem. Oh yeah, and a Scratch-It too.
*money sliding * *Scratch-It sliding *
*scratching *
*scratching rapidly *
Holy f___k, I won! I won a lot! I won $20,000!(background)
(chanting) Al!
...Al?
*snoring *
(fill music)
I just don't reckon I need your help this year Burt. The wheat fields are ready for harvest come July.
And my wife Gretchen's on her hooves growing the turnips and spinach again.
What if I helped your lady with the gardenin', huh?
I work great with dirt and...soil, and uh...mud.
Aw, thanks Burt. But we already have another guy for that.
Do you like water? Huh?
Huh...
Well he isn't he just a 'Great Ball of Fire'. Well, I'll tell you what Rudie,
'Rootie-Tootie'. Uh, tell ya what '***'.
Let me drive the columbine through the season. You only have to pay minimum wage huh?
It's a deal! Oh, I don't know Burt. 'Member what happened last time
when it rained?
*rainfall * Will somebody give me a hand here?
*car passing * Hey.
Hey! I can't swim.
Ah, forget about it.
*car passing * Hey, learn how to swim!
F_________k you!
That happened one time there '***' - one time.
Here go down to Manley's and ask for a guy named 'Joey' - that's my brother
and he can find you some work.
*commercial * Car! Car! Car! Bad Credit?! No Credit!? No idea how to drive?! Vato. (background)
No idea how to drive? Who cares!? We can get you a car! Just come down and see us
*commercial * at Wholesale Auto Credit and Car Sales! We have every car you
*commercial * might want! And all we want to do is get you a car! We are rich, vato!
*commercial * Car! Wholesale Auto Credit and Car Sales - where you walk
*commercial * walk right in, and drive right out!
So...Did you rob
a bank? No holmes, I won this in a Scratch-It!
...Oh.
Let's get you a new shirt 'ese'. That ones 'loco'.
Uri, you blind hermaphroditic motherf____r!
Can you not see that Carlos is merely leading you astray?
You need to feel and touch your way
back to the grassy knolls from which you came Uri. Or it will all be over
soon...Listen.
You're going to have a gay daughter.
I knew you'd be fine with it because I made you that way.
(fill music)So, you and Rudie...
Uh, you guys twins? Inbred twins to be exact!
Augh! Alright. (with laughter)
What can I do you for? Ah, your brother Rudie said you
could find some work for me? Well, we're lookin' to recruit some new riders.
How long've you been ridin' for?
Uh, you know. I uh - I head out on the highway.
Lookin' for adventure...From uh, time to time.
Is that right? What do you ride? Eh, whatever I can
get my hands on what about you? Hmm. '86 Blackline with an air-cooled
twin-cam engine. 86,000 miles burnt. Chrome chasis with the shotgun
pipes. Her name's Betsy
*text message tone * "Somebody just sent me a text message"
*text message tone * "Gotta check it! Gotta check it!
(thumb tapping on screen)
(thumb tapping on screen)
I should go now, huh? (background) Yeah, you should probably get outta here. (background)
*snoring * Hey how ya doin' kid?
Hey Al. (sighs) I'm having a hard time trying to find a job around here.
I've been to Rudie's farm, I went to go see his brother Joey at Manley's. Even
tried to make my own rap album earlier today.
*hip-hop music * "Utilizing my tools in '92. MC's step up and mob to defeat us when we rock
*rap music * knots and got props like Norm Peterson. Lots friends, lots fun, lots of beers
*rap music * got the skills, kreeno so I always get cheers"
Well, what about a degree kid? You got one of those? Ah, you know I got kicked out, Al.
Remember?
Okay 'class', today we're going to learn about compound words. Words like "railroad" and "textbook".
Yes, Burt?
Yeah, I got two. F___k-this, I'm-out!
Oh yeah, that's right. Boy, am I tired. I wish I was at the beach layin' in the shade.
That way I could sleep all day. That's it! I'll just go down to the beach and
talk to Eddie! See if Eddie's got any spots open for me. Thanks Al!
Don't mention it, kid.
Hey Eddie! Eddie! You up there?
Get down here, ya rat! (background) One second, dude!
Vicious cakes, bro. Aw Burt! What's up dude?
Hey well uh, Eddie - pal. I'm looking for a job. I might be
pretty good at doing something like this. Go on dude.
So I was wondering. You guys got any spots for me? Hey, well Burt bro
Uh, we just hired on Jenny last week and um, I'm
afraid that we don't need any more bodies on until next summer. Sorry 'duder'!
Ah!
*bite sound * *munching *
*swallows *
*slithering *
*wood cracking *
*crashes * Later, dude!
(fill music)
*walking sounds *
*walking sounds *
Oh hey, Jorge! We've been looking all over for you.
Uh, do I know you? We're done with the job, will you buy us some new clothes now?
You said it, I sang it, now buy me some clothes! Ladies, con permiso but I think you
have mistaken Uri and I for someone else. "Me llamo Carlos".
Oh no way, Jorge! It's us - Yvonne and Latisha - don't you remember?
*store music blares * "Girl look at the body, I work out! (repeats)"
*store music blares * "Girl look at the body, I work out! (repeats)"
Oh yeah!
*music video *
*music video *
*music video * "Nah! Nah! Nah!"
*music video * "What's that? Yeah."
*music video * "Yeah. Yeah. Funky, funky!"
*music video * "How 'bout a big hand now? Wait, wait a minute!"
*music video *
*music video *
*music video *
*music video *
*music video *
*music video * "Nah! Nah! Nah!"
*music video * "What's that?!"
*music video * "Funky, funky!"
*music video *
*music video *
*music video *
*music video *
*music video *
*music video *
*music video *
*music video *
*music video *
*music video *
Hi, my name is uh, is a-uh (hesitation)
Frank-uh-Fred it's uh, "Fred Lift" and uh (laughs)
I'm here (uh) supporting 'Burt the Worm' (laughter)
*introduction *
*introduction *
*introduction *
*introduction *
*introduction *
*introduction *
Hi, I'm Steve Palmer - creator of Burt the Worm. And welcome to The Intermission.
I know it sounds boring, but that's okay. We'll keep you laughing with some interviews and
some behind-the-scenes footage of the cast and characters. Thanks for watching!
You and your bug's life (background)
...bug-eyed view (background)
Oh, we still recording? (background) It's okay. I'm a hand. (background)
I'm eating Stephen's face! (background)
I'm eating Stephen's face! (background) Alright, so here we go.
Dude you taste like s___t! (background)
I'd say 'describing Burt the Worm the show' uh, it's very much a...
(Uhm)
It's like,
It's like
I would say that it's like (uh), you know...
(uh) (uhm)
(uhm)
You know, (uh)
(uhmm)
(uhm)
Aw, man (uh)
(uh), (uh), (uh)
(mmmm)
(AHHHH!)
(uhmm)
(and uh)
You know (uh)
Ahhh, *blehh *
We said it a hundred times ya know, 'ran out of f___ks to give' - now that is exactly it.
The show is (eh) we're out of water in this cup
and it's and dry and
(please stand by)
(please stand by)
(please stand by)
(please stand by)
(please stand by)
(please stand by)
(please stand by)
(please stand by)
We ran out of (uh) movement. We ran out of (uh) (uh)
way to stand, and the best thing we can come up with is (you know)
in this (this) forgotten generation, this forgotten era, for
rebuts (uh) all these plots that we've seen a hundred times in cartoons
we've spent them. You know, we can't do another fat man with an attractive
wife, we can't do another want-to-be sitcom. We can't do
another detective, or special-agent comedy.
All we're at is a homeless worm.
Because that's all that can come out of this generation. And you know, that exactly (uh) that's a very
important thing (you know) what Beavis and Butthead
did 20 years ago is what we're doing now (you know)
The only thing they could latch onto was these two heavy-metal kids
the only thing we can latch onto is this (you know) forgotten,
wasted life-guy. Who (you know) deep down inside, he's a hero
and maybe we'll get that someday. But (you know) right now, it's just that.
And yeah.
It's not all right there on the surface for you. It's kind of
(you know) the jokes are subtle, but hilarious.
It all kind of comes together and it's really funny
and there's little surprises, and its really enjoyable.
One of the best (uhm) it's
it's a lot of fun, and it's really funny and light-hearted
and it's a good show (yeah)
(please stand by)
(please stand by)
(please stand by)
(please stand by)
(please stand by)
Don't f___k up, dude. (background)
Yeah, man. (background) There's so much pressure. There's like
two or three dudes looking at me right now. Talk about pressure.
That could only mean something happened. That could only mean something happened (deeper)
Uri, let that b____h go!
Just these two things, "mi amigo!" Dude, you got "chinese on it" (background)
Just these two things mi amigo! (chinese accent)
When I was like - really young - I was like 12. I had a dream where I died and I went to Heaven
and I meant God and it was like a 6-year old black girl at tea party.
D-Down the counter?
Oh, s___t
I'm trying to find...a good posture
(laughs)
One more time (background) Just these two thiiings, mi amigo.
Little bit fast on the "things" Just these two thiings, mi amigo.
Little bit faster on the "things". Just these two thiings, mi amigo.
Little bit faster on the "things" man! (laughs)
*whistle * Spinach.
*lips smacking * Mmmm.
Chillin' with his boys, I don't even know!
My precious!
Hey, learn how to swim!
H-wow!
Sometimes great things are hard to find
Yvonne, there you are!
Comfortable in his own...worm-flesh (background)
In his own epidermis (laughs) epider-epidermis. Say that to it. I'm comfortable in my own
In my own epidermal layer (laughs) "epidermal layer" I just feel around with my hermaphroditic
body and go through grass and mud and I find *** (laughs in background)
mates with other hermaphroditic genitals in the middle of their body too and we
wrap around each other and roll around in the grass like a couple of puppies on a Spring day or something.
I think that will do - just - we can move on (background) (laughing) I just want it perfect!
Ah you know you win some you lose some Stephen
(please stand by)
(please stand by)
(please stand by)
(please stand by)
*dubstep music * "Basshead!"
*bottle blowing sound *
Uri unless you paid for her let her go (laughs)
And now ladies and gentleman back to the show
(fill music)
*TV click *
*commercial * "You. Are. Hired!"
*commercial * "Claim your position today!"
*commercial * "Learn how to mix drinks"
*commercial * "Pick up hot chicks on the job!"
*commercial * "So what're you waiting for?" (background)
*commercial * "You're late for work! Get down here now!" (background)
Hey what's the deal with those girls man?
I thought I told them to meet us here at three.
Don't worry they'll show boss
*party music *
*party music *
*party music *
They're not showing up
This never happens man
That could only mean something happened Well hey Carlos, how ya doin? (background)
Hey where'd the ladies go?
Hey so you, you want to get out of here?
I'm sorry Trumpet Man, but I think you have mistaken
Marv and I for someone else - I'm Jorge
You're not Carlos? With the pet worm
and two hoes? Did you say two hoes?!
Where can I find this Carlos guy? They all went to the
the shake club. Few blocks down. Come on Marv
This is so much fun!
Jorge usually never treats us this good Yeah don't
you think that's kinda strange though girl? On a regular day the man
never buys us this much stuff. Or treats us this good.
Yeah, I guess that's true.
I mean look at him.
Woohoo! Work it, holmes! (chanting)
Hmm, maybe that isn't Jorge
You said it, I sang it sister.
(chair scooting)
(chair scooting)
Excuse me, Jacks on the Rocks and a Cosmo please
And slide it down the counter when you're finished D-Down, down the counter? Yeah, down the counter.
*drinks slide *
For you, my lady Oh look at you, wha-what's your
name? Mine's Kathy Uri.
This one time I slayed a bear, that's why I'm so intensely strong
Mmm, I like you. Follow me.
*Kathy falls *
*Uri jumps on top *
*door crashes open *
There he is! I know this because he looks exactly like me! Let's get him!
Don't move! Where are the girls? Keep it in your pants man, they're right here
*gun clicks * *women scream *
I'm going to ask you one more time. Where are the girls?
You better tell 'em kid!
You better tell 'em kid!
What is your name? (background)
Carlos. Carlos? I'll tell you what
I'll give you to the count of.. Jorge! Stop it!
Yvonne! There you are!
Are you being mean to this man Jorge?
Yes. I was.
I've missed you
I thought you was a worm You what?!
Now even though I got you two mixed up doesn't mean you can treat him like this.
*slap * That's my girl!
Hey! What'd I miss? Nothing, man. Oh
Hey, I'm Uri Oh, Uri huh? Now that's enough!
Carlos, unless you pay off a whole day's worth of services, you can't just steal from
me and try and get away with it. That's crossing the line - and now I must shoot you in your ugly face for it
...Wait
*gulping *
*grunts *
*throw swoosh *
*glass break *
Oh hell no!
*gun *** *
*shooting *
*shooting *
*impact *
*shaking * Hey come on man, "vamanos!"
Yeah, yeah, yeah good idea
Uh, let's get out of here (uhm)
yeah yeah
*slithering *
*walking * *slithering *
*body slide *
Uri, let her go...Uri (background)
That's (uh) that's a good boy. You doing good
*coughs * Agh, what the hell was that?
Oh (grunts). Hey Jorge are you alright?
Jorge, are you alright?
*sniffles *
What's a matter, boss?
It's just no use Marv
No matter how hard I ***
I'll never be as good as my uncle Philipe - it's just no use
*whimpering * Ah, well.
Wait, where did the girls go now? Looks like they took off there, boss.
Let's go get 'em! They took off?!
*angry grunts * *shooting *
*shooting * (body drops)
Are you all better now? (interrupting) Yeah, I feel better now
*walking *
Are you guys alright? Burt!
You saved our lives back there man, thank you
How'd you think of throwing that bottle? Wait, what?
Well, that was-that was just some bad whisky
Aren't you going to lose your job though? Most likely but
You know what guys?
I've learned (uh) *happy music starts *
*happy music * I've learned a big lesson today. It's not about trying to find happiness with
*happy music * money, it's about - it's about spending time with your family
*happy music * and friends - especially when you need 'em the most.
*happy music * That's what makes me happy.
*happy music * And it's also about ***, and tacos, and
*happy music * ***, and Vaseline, and Castrol,
*happy music * and carrots. That's cool. I won
*happy music * $20,000 on a Scratch-It and Uri and I blew it on hookers
*happy music * *** and excursions - no big deal
You what!? *Uri inhales *
We picked up some hookers bought them some new clothes
copped a '64 Impala pimped it out with some switches
hired 300 women to ride next as we bounced down the street
went scuba diving and I almost got eaten by a fish
walked to the strip danced a whole bunched almost got shot
by some pimps and now we're here. *Uri inhales *
Carlos! God!
Heh-heh-hey Burt! Come on Burt!
You love your friends and your family - especially your pal Carlos!
Remember? Get over here!
*happy music * We could of started our own business! (background)
*happy music * Hey amigo, we still can! See? I got five dollars left! (background)
*happy music * Guess you could say "I got five on it!" I got five on it.
I'm a lot more good looking and slippier than they are