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We all work on the Great West Line,
which goes to Saint-Malo, Batignolles and Brest,
Conflans, Triel, Poissy, Barentin, Pavilly,
Vernon, Bolbec, Nointot, Motteville, Yvetot,
Saint-Aubin, Viroflay, Landerneau, Malaunay,
Laval, Condé, Guingamp, Saint-Brieuc and Fécamp.
We close the doors, we sell newspapers.
We open the barriers, we operate the signals.
We all work on the Great West Line,
which goes to Saint-Malo, Batignolles and Brest,
Conflans, Triel, Poissy, Barentin, Pavilly,
Vernon, Bolbec, Nointot, Motteville, Yvetot,
Saint-Aubin, Viroflay, Landerneau, Malaunay,
Laval, Condé, Guingamp, Saint-Brieuc and Fécamp.
We all work on the Great West Line,
which goes to Saint-Malo, Batignolles and Brest!
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome.
Beware of pickpockets on the trains and in the station.
Look after your belongings!
Thank you.
The Yvetot train is running two hours late.
Please consult the arrivals board. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Excuse me, monsieur!
What time's the Trouville train due?
As long as Métella is on it!
Dunno. Consult the arrivals board!
Sorry to bother you! I thought that's why you're here!
- Calm down! - You should calm down!
- No need to take that tone! - What tone? - In five minutes!
- What business is it of mine? - Nothing!
Métella will be here in five minutes.
Your attention, please. The Lisieux train due at platform M
will arrive at platform 13.
It's Raoul de Gardefeu.
I'm not speaking to him.
It's young Bobinet. He's not speaking to me.
I was Blanche Taupier's lover. All Paris knows that.
Blanche Taupier loved me as only she can. All Paris knows that.
We were living at Ville-d'Avray. One morning Blanche said:
"Bob, let's invite Gardefeu to dinner."
Blanche rings me from Ville-d'Avray:
"Come tomorrow at one. I'll be alone."
"Tell them at home you'll be back at once."
I answer: "Fine, let's invite Gardefeu."
Ladies and gentlemen, due to industrial action
all trains to and from Troquenville have been cancelled.
We apologize for any inconvenience.
She says:
"His driver dumped him off. Go and fetch him."
"He's at home at one o'clock. Don't come back without him." Off I go.
I get to Ville-d'Avray, find Blanche but I don't find Bobinet.
I double-park outside Gardefeu's.
It's impossible to park. Alphonse says to me:
"Monsieur will be back any minute." It was one o'clock. I wait for him.
Two o'clock, then three o'clock.
Ladies and gentlemen, we apologize for the delay.
At three o'clock I decide to go home,
with time to recover the car from the pound.
I return to Ville-d'Avray and find him sitting there.
He came back around seven. I said: "Why,"
"you were at my place and I at yours! How hilarious!"
I didn't find it at all hilarious.
So we don't speak to each other any more!
Ladies and gentlemen, the fast train from Trouville is now arriving.
Please stand clear of the edge of the platform.
The sky is dark, it's going to rain
any minute now, to be sure.
Let's run off, let's hurry
or we shan't find any cabs.
Let's run off.
- Métella! - Métella!
Blast it! Drat it!
I'm trapped!
You seem rather put out, madame,
and your arm is trembling inside mine.
Perhaps madame is surprised to see us!
These two gentlemen seem to know you.
These gentlemen?
These gentlemen.
These gentlemen...
Never met them.
You've never met us?
First of all, let me affix
my eyeglass below my eyebrow.
There! Now, let's see a front view,
a three-quarters view and then a profile.
Well, now, like it or not, although I do look you up and down
and survey you to my heart's content,
I've never met you, no truly, never met you!
Never met us? Never met us?
No, no, no, truly!
- Never met you! - Never met us?
Well, you've certainly got a nerve.
You may meet other men, my Gontran, who, like these two,
will tell you I must know them.
Don't believe them, dearest.
I may, one evening, peradventure, at a ball have accepted their arm.
But apart from that, I swear to you
I've never met them, no truly, never met them!
Never met us? Never met us?
No, no, no, truly,
- never met you! - Never met us?
Your attention, please.
Do not tempt pickpockets.
Close your bags, keep your purses out of sight
and above all don't encourage begging. Thank you.
- Gardefeu! - Bobinet!
- Treason tore us apart. - Let treason reunite us.
She was cheating on us.
- I suspected so. - So did I.
What do you expect? We don't speak the same language.
- Really? - You know very well.
I need to speak of higher things.
- I know, yes. - Well, it clearly finished off poor Métella,
who has rather limited abilities. So much the better!
- I don't know whether you've noticed... - No.
Wait, you don't even know what I'm going to say.
Women of the world complain we've abandoned them,
- young fashionable people... They're right. - Right.
So I thought about it and I decided.
I'm going to create a "movimento" that'll bring back shining youth.
The poor marquises are sad to see us shunning their salons
and making fools of ourselves with all sorts of low women.
Ungrateful beasts, the poor dears say, wouldn't they find in our homes,
the homes of virtuous women,
far more exquisite pleasures?
So, let's go and by tomorrow
let's revive the salons of Saint-Germain!
Besides, old boy, I'm persuaded to give up the world of courtesans
since my purse is so empty that it quite distresses me.
Now, if you just stop and think,
when one is penniless, you see,
it's high time to renounce vice
and go straight back to virtue.
So, let's go, and by tomorrow
let's revive the salons of Saint-Germain!
And now, I'm for the Rue de Varennes
and for the home of little Countess Diane de la Roche-Trompette!
Bye, see you!
Bye.
Ladies and gentlemen,
please help to keep your station tidy.
Please use the litter bins placed here at your disposal.
Thank you for your cooperation.
A woman of the world, that's not a bad plan!
But how can I find a woman of the world who's willing?
Ah, yes! I know one: Madame de Beaupertuis.
She had a husband and called herself baroness. But was she really a lady?
- No, monsieur, she wasn't. - Joseph!
- My former valet! - So it is. - What are you doing here?
- It's a long story, monsieur... - Oh, really?
- ...that you don't need to know. - So much the better.
I'm no longer a chauffeur, monsieur,
- I'm a guide. - A guide!
Ah, Joseph! The Alps, the glaciers!
We're not talking about mountains, monsieur!
I'm a guide, a cicerone at the Grand Hotel.
I take foreigners around Paris.
Oh!
May we remind you that in keeping with the no-smoking law
the whole station is a no-smoking area.
Thank you for your cooperation.
Please use the litter bins placed at your disposal. Thank you.
- Are you expecting passengers? - Yes, monsieur.
A Swedish baron and his wife.
- A Swedish baroness! - Naturally.
Why, that's a lady of fashion.
I like to think so, monsieur.
Your attention, please.
The Caen train has been much delayed.
- Joseph! - Monsieur?
This baron and baroness, they don't know you?
Not at all.
So there could be no objection to my taking your place.
- Provided I agreed... - And you'll agree.
Your attention, please.
The Saint-Malo train has suffered a loss of power.
Please check the arrivals board. Thank you.
Okay, monsieur, I'll make my baron and baroness over to you.
- Couldn't I have just the baroness? - No, monsieur, they're a pair.
A pair it'll be! I'll take both!
I'll find them and bring them to you.
- Do what you like with them. - Go, my good Joseph.
I'll be their guide. Go and get me my Swedes!
I'm off, monsieur!
The Mézidon-Canon train is arriving at platform 6.
How strange! I don't even know this woman
yet I'm all a-twitter as I wait for her!
How amazing life is! I was Métella's lover.
The *** has left me high and dry! How amazing life is!
I thought I loved her and yet within fifteen minutes I've forgotten her!
How amazing life is! I was Métella's lover.
I'm going to escort a Swedish lady through elegant society.
I've now become a guide, I'm going to escort a Swedish lady.
I must try and be amusing and entertain the baroness.
I'm going to escort a Swedish lady
through elegant society.
If this baroness is pretty I know just where I mean to take her
and it's not hard to guess where if this baroness is pretty.
I fully intend to lead her into the ways of folly.
If this baroness is pretty, I know just where I mean to take her.
And if the baroness isn't pretty I'll palm her off on Joseph.
Your attention, please.
May we remind you that this train goes to Marly le Haut
and Saint Germain en l'Haut, I mean, en Laye.
Please wait for the next trains.
Thank you and goodnight.
Here's your guide, Monsieur le Baron.
Raoul, here are your passengers!
How pretty she is! Fine! Go away, Joseph.
***! I hadn't thought of that!
I still don't understand but it sounds sweeter.
Your attention, please.
May we remind you that this train goes to Marly le Haut.
Take us at once to the Grand Hotel.
I hated Normandy, all that rain! I want to rest.
A good bath will revive us!
What shall we do? This guide doesn't speak Swedish.
Why don't we speak French to him?
What a good idea! It'd never occurred to me...
My good man...
Well, I'll be... I can understand Swedish!
- You do know Paris well, don't you? - Why, no, it's French!
Do I know Paris, Madame la Baronne!
You have my word as a cicerone:
this modern-day Babylon will never have seen within its walls
any foreigners better shown around or better guided,
better conducted, entertained, directed, lodged,
better served, amused, delighted, dazzled.
And for all of this you'll pay,
monsieur, monsieur, whatever you like.
You'll receive adequate wages.
Ah, don't let's mention it!
Let's forget these sordid details. We'll be bound to agree.
I should hope so.
You'll receive adequate wages.
Your words are more than enough.
Tell me now, tell me,
where do you want me to take you?
I'd like to go to the theatre,
not those where you're bored to death
but those where skittish actresses display countless perfections to your gaze.
Certainly, monsieur, we'll go there and you'll see all these things.
Why really, shall we go there?
Yes, and you'll see all these things.
And I, in the capital, I want to see the wildly acclaimed prima donnas.
I want to see Dessay in "Don Pasquale" and Bartoli in "Le Sapeur".
Certainly, madame, we'll go there and you'll see all such things.
- Why really, shall we go there? - Yes, and you'll see all these things.
You'll be our guide in this gorgeous city
and we'll go everywhere, we'll visit every place.
Ah, you'll be our guide.
Ah, I'll be your guide.
There are certain things I want to see. Let's speak softly
for on that subject, as you may guess,
my wife mustn't hear a word!
Oh, you're a naughty rascal!
Why, my intentions are perfectly honourable!
I've some shopping to do on my own. Let's speak softly.
Of such matters it's imperative my husband shouldn't hear a word.
Gracious, the baroness quite scares me!
Why, my intentions are perfectly honourable!
Don't worry, everything will be fine!
Come, come, you'll see even more than you think.
You'll be our guide in this gorgeous city
and we'll go everywhere, we'll visit every place.
- Ah, you'll be our guide. - Ah, I'll be your guide.
- Let's go! - What about our luggage? - Ah, your luggage...
- What do you mean? - You're worried about your luggage?
Of course. The baroness has forty-four cases.
For your own safety all abandoned bags will be immediately destroyed.
- Keep an eye on your belongings! - Oh, that's dreadful!
I'll get them. Come with me, it'll be safer.
That way you'll recognize them.
- What brutes! - This guide is good...
- Also, it's very dirty! - This is Paris, my dear!
- Let's run! - Let's run!
Here we come by droves to Paris, here we all rush to Paris.
We'll make our way in Paris, we'll ruin ourselves in Paris.
I'm Brazilian, I have gold and I've come all the way from Rio.
Richer today than ever before, Paris, here I come back to you.
Twice have I been here already, I had gold in my suitcase,
diamonds in my shirtfront, how long did it all last?
Time enough to have two hundred friends and to love four or five mistresses,
six months of amorous raptures and then nothing, O Paris!
Within six months you had bled me dry and then back to my young America
you discreetly packed me off, a poor and melancholy wretch!
But I was longing to come back and out there, under my wild skies,
I kept on repeating furiously: Another fortune or I'll die!
I didn't die! I earned enormous sums as best I could
and I've come back to let you steal everything I myself stole over there.
I'm Brazilian, I have gold and I've come all the way from Rio.
Richer today than ever before, Paris, here I come back to you.
I'm Brazilian, I have gold and I've come all the way from Rio.
Paris, here I come back to you!
Hurray, I've just stepped off the train. Put on your false hair, you hussies!
Hurray, I've brought your little teeth a great big fortune to nibble at.
Here comes the gull, pluck away, take my dollars, my banknotes,
my watch, my hat, my boots
but tell me you love me.
I'm for fun and laughter and all kind of saucy dances.
I'm for the nights of Paris. Take me to the ball of Asnières!
Only let me warn you, though, that, since such is my nature,
I'll take my money's worth, I swear I shall.
Come, come to me!
Paris!
Paris! Paris!
Let's step into the burning furnace!
Let's step inside, the time has come!
For anyone who is well-off
Paris is a delightful place.
Have you anything to declare?
No, nothing.
Here we are, here we come, from every country in the world.
Here we are, here we come, over land and sea.
Italians, Brazilians, Japanese and Dutchmen,
Spaniards and Rumaniards,
Egyptians and Prussians.
Here we are, here we come, from every country in the world.
Here we are, here we come, over land and sea.
The steam engine brought us. We've come to invade
the sovereign city, the abode of pleasure.
Everyone is running, is rushing to come and taste, O Paris,
the raptures of your days and nights.
All the delighted foreigners are darting off to you, Paris.
We'll dance, we'll skip,
we'll sing, we'll sup,
we'll love, we'll scream...
Yes, O my God, we're all going to enjoy ourselves to the hilt!
The steam engine brought us. We've come to invade
the sovereign city, the abode of pleasure.
Everyone is running, is rushing to come and taste, O Paris,
the raptures of your days and nights.
All the delighted foreigners
are darting off to you, Paris.
The Trouville train seems late.
Monsieur said he'd be back at once.
- You've already been to Trouville? - No. The rain, thank you.
You're wrong. It seems very good.
Sets you free, as you people say.
Yes, free from the cows and the rain!
Alphonse, wouldn't you like to look round a bit?
- What? - I'm waiting for the glover. I think I can hold my end up.
You've found what you're looking for!
Come back in a moment. I've forgotten something.
- In crocodile. - Right you are. - I'm off.
But not for long.
Come in, come in, pretty blue-eyed lass,
to the home of the cocotte's darling,
Monsieur Raoul de Gardefeu.
You're bringing some gloves and I'm bringing some boots.
Yes, I'm bringing gloves.
And I'm bringing boots.
I'm the glover.
I, the bootmaker.
- Such is my calling. - Such is my occupation.
I'm in the first ranks...
I'm in the first ranks....
- ...first ranks of glovers. - ...first ranks of bootmakers.
Ah, here's the glover, here's the bootmaker!
One can feel proud, one can feel superior
when one is a glover, when one is a bootmaker!
By his boot one can tell a truly elegant man.
No young man is, in fact, approved of by good society
unless he be smartly gloved.
- Unless he be finely shod. - Unless he be finely gloved.
In the truly elegant man look not for the boot but for the glove.
- It's the glove. - Not the glove.
- It's the boot! - It's the glove!
In the old days more than one tender and gallant lover
made bold to steal his mistress's glove.
As fast as he could he took it away and hid it
and smothered it with burning kisses.
He held this lovely treasure far dearer than his gold
and kissed it again and again.
And then, when love had vanished, he'd keep this darling glove,
the sole remaining token.
And later, it would be found, when love's alarms were all over,
at the bottom of an old box, next to some yellowed letters.
In the old days they'd keep our gloves in memory of our little hands.
Now, our heart's beloved may also keep our little boots.
And later our lovers, having grown old,
with those boots will fill a closet,
which, musingly, they'll open to gaze at
and as they see these boots they'll say:
This one was Madame Paméla de Sandoval,
to whom I gave away my soul on a wild carnival night.
That one was Denise, the fair-haired little minx!
The comtesse and the marquise, here they both are!
O ecstasy of a frozen heart! In these boots lives all our past
and this, gentlemen, goes to prove that sentimentality
makes everything sacred,
even old boots and old gloves!
In the old days more than one lover made bold to steal his mistress's glove.
He took it away and hid it and smothered it with burning kisses.
Finally! Two compatriots,
both of them German and without an accent!
That's cool!
- You fit me like a glove. - Calm down!
My dear, I don't make boots just for men,
I also make boots for women.
Oh, yes?
- Help! - Little boots,
big boots,
thigh-length boots.
Come here, I'll take your measurements.
Sit down, let me see your legs.
- But I don't want you to. - I insist.
Look out, here's the boss!
He can't see you just now.
- Go in there. - I'll take your measurements.
- No! - Yes!
- Alphonse! - Monsieur?
Pay this dreadful taxi
and help the people bring up the luggage!
- The luggage? - Yes, hurry up!
I brought them home and said they were at the Grand Hotel.
The Swedish lady is very pretty.
Now the main thing is to keep hold of her.
- Are all taxis like that? - All of them!
- I thought he was going to bite us. - Sometimes they do!
- My God! - Calm down!
Let's see...
- Alphonse! - Monsieur?
Put madame's luggage over there.
This will be your room, madame.
As for Monsieur le Baron, we put him down there.
- Marvellous! - Very good. If you'll excuse me
I'm going to freshen up. This fellow is nobody's fool!
- There! It's done! - That's it, the Grand Hotel.
But it's tiny!
You're in one of the Grand Hotel's little hotels.
- I don't understand. - The Grand Hotel was full up
so the management bought many little hotels
to accommodate their really important guests.
It's very "new style".
- Impressive! - Indeed, monsieur.
As Paris is becoming a tourist trap
the Grand Hotel and its annexes will take over all the city.
Before long no one will live in Paris any longer.
They'll just come here to have a good time, to dine,
do their shopping, go to the theatre...
...and meet women.
Yes. I can see you coming.
You know Frascata?
- Frascata? - The baron.
He met a young lady here in Paris.
She was an actress. Her name was Métella.
- I knew it! - Sorry? - Nothing.
He gave me a letter,
how shall I put it, a letter of introduction to her.
- Do you know where she lives? - Of course!
- How do you know? - I'm a guide, monsieur.
Well, deliver this letter to her as soon as possible, for...
In this city, teeming with pleasures, joy and love,
in this heavenly city I'll not be staying long.
I'll remain three months, at most,
and three months is a short time, I think,
a short time for tasting everything.
And so, during these three months,
I want to stuff myself up to there.
Take the letter to Métella. I want to stuff myself up to there!
I'll take the letter to Métella. He wants to stuff himself up to there!
My father, an austere gentleman, gave me a severe upbringing.
My father didn't understand one bit all the demands made by my heart.
I had to remain innocent right up to my wedding day
but I intend to make up for it and now is the time, or never!
I want to stuff myself up to there!
Take the letter to Métella.
I want to stuff myself up to there!
I'll take the letter to Métella.
He wants to stuff himself up to there!
He's desperate! It's agreed, monsieur,
- I'll have it delivered. - When's dinner?
- Whenever you like. - Isn't there a table d'hôte?
Table d'hôte?
- You like that, eh? - Certainly!
I've no intention of dining alone with the baroness.
- Bravo! - With no table d'hôte, I'm leaving.
Don't leave! There'll be one!
- At any cost! - What does that mean?
Well, you can pay less or more for it.
Less is better. By the way,
- what am I going to spend here? - I'm not going to...
I can manage...
- 500 francs a day. - That's 10 francs! - 10 francs?
- Too expensive? - Per head? - For everyone!
It's being given away!
And people say Paris is expensive!
- What time's the table d'hôte? - What?
Ah! At seven o'clock, the table d'hôte.
- Or eight o'clock? Or nine? - No, that's fine.
A table d'hôte! I can fit twenty people in my dining room
but where can I find the guests?
Ah, you! A velvet glove, an iron hand...
- Hands off me! - What's that?
- He's annoying me. - Let her go!
I've brought your boots.
- And I, your gloves. - There!
You know we've never dined together.
- True! - Never ever! - Would tonight suit you?
- Tonight? - Are you already taken? - Not at all.
That's not all. You must have friends, both male and female.
- I hope so! - Of course! - What if you were to invite them?
- It's all right by me. - Sure. - But a table d'hôte...
There's no table d'hôte without a major!
I must have a major!
Do you remember the one I sent you?
Major Edouard? He never paid me! Had to set the law on him
and finally managed to extract one old frogged tailcoat.
Cool! Tonight you'll put that on and you'll be the major.
- But I won't know... - Yes!
Their decorations make people majors!
I also need the widow of a colonel.
I know one, I'll take the part.
- Till seven then! - Till seven!
That's capital! I'll have my table d'hôte!
What's wrong with you?
It's a disaster, old friend.
I'd decided to mix with women of the world
because other women cost too much!
Do you know what little Roche-Trompette has just asked?
- No. - She said:
"You alone can save me,"
"I need fifty thousand francs."
- Oh, ***! - "Lend it to me."
"I'll repay you on Thursday at ten past seven."
I answered: "Comtesse, you'll have your money in two hours."
- With that I left. - What?
- I'm broke! - You shouldn't have given your word!
It made her so happy!
Happiness that lasts even two hours is worth every penny.
By the way...
I found a Swedish baroness at the station.
- I know. Alphonse told me everything. - Well, tonight,
to keep Baron and Baroness de Gondremarck on the premises
I've improvised a table d'hôte.
But tomorrow, to keep the lady here on her own and the Baron out late,
very late, I'd need...
You'd need?
I don't know!
- Tonight, a table d'hôte? - Yes, alas! - And tomorrow,
the same idea but on a grander scale:
a party at the Quimper-Karadecs', in honour of your Swede.
- Brilliant! But how? - They're taking the waters at a spa.
- At a Spar? - Not a Spar, a spa.
The house is all mine. Send your baron over.
Bob, you save me!
Who's this gentleman?
- Introduce me. - It's nothing. He's no one!
- Thank you. - He's the hotel clockmaker.
He winds up all eight hundred clocks. Leave us. Go.
Yes, I'm the clockmaker.
That's my job.
Good. I'm off.
Look what I found on the mantelpiece!
- Five pretty rings! - Ah, they belong to... - To?
To the person who had the room before you.
- There was also a gentleman. - Really? - I found this.
I read only the first word:
- Raoul... - That's me.
- That's you? - No, not me at all.
It's another Raoul.
Would anyone write a letter like that to me?
- What's all this? - The client, there she is.
- What? - Madame, I've found some belongings of yours
and I was asking this gentleman to return them to you.
- What? - I'll go back to my room.
Her room!
Darling, I was coming to give you an explanation.
I might as well ask you for one.
- What's the use? - And if I insisted?
Well, my dear, we're destitute.
I had to rent out my town house and work as a guide.
- What? - There's a baron and his wife here, and I'm their guide.
It's all over between us anyway. Here are your rings.
It's over?
That's sad! And the bracelet?
There was a bracelet?
- I believe so. With emeralds. - I see!
- We'll find it. - I adore you.
Darling, I must go. They're waiting for me.
I was asked to give you this. From Baron de Frascata.
- Frascata? - The one from last winter.
- No! I swear to you... - Why?
- What does he want, this Frascata? - Just read it.
"Do you remember, lovely one, a man whose name is"
"Jean Stanislas, Baron de Frascata?"
"Some time, last season, someone, at my request,"
"during a great ball at your place, introduced us."
"Need I say I was in love?"
"Were you? I never really knew!"
"You would say so but with such a smile!"
"It wasn't love but it was just as good."
"This bliss lasted six wonderful weeks"
"crammed full of all the most extravagant pastimes."
"Glasses would be shattered and your red lips would say"
"all kinds of saucy and high-spirited words."
"Ah, what a time it was, six rapturous weeks!"
"The endless suppers, the merry songs,"
"and you, above all, you, the best of mistresses,"
"you first and foremost... But let us skip all this."
"Shall I tell you, my love, that I now languish"
"like a lost soul on my father's estates"
"and that my only joy throughout these dark hours"
"is to dream of a sky-blue boudoir!"
"If only you knew how rare pleasure is"
"under our cold skies,"
"if you knew, above all... But I'm getting sidetracked."
"Let's not forget why I'm writing this!"
"A worthy gentleman, a friend of mine"
"named de Gondremarck, is leaving tomorrow."
"His whim will take him to the banks of the Seine,"
"where he means, I think, to have a good time."
"Just a minute ago he took me aside and said:"
"'Where must I go to enjoy myself?' But then,"
"I, with a smile - will you forgive that smile? -"
"I said at once: 'Just go to Métella!"'
"Will you hear my prayer and welcome him, my dear,"
"and be again as kind as you once were?"
"Put on, to beguile him, that loveliest of smiles."
"I can absolutely vouch for him."
"I'm sending him to you so that later, lovely one,"
"when he returns, for return here he must,"
"O Métella, he too may remember"
"all the delights that haunt my memory."
"Some time, last season, someone, at my request,"
"during a great ball at your place, introduced us."
"Do you remember, lovely one, the man whose name is"
"Jean Stanislas de Frascata?"
Who's this Baron de Gondremarck?
- The man I'm showing around. - Ah, the tart's husband.
- As you say. - Well, here I am!
- Oh! - This is she! - Ah! It is she! Who?
- Métella! - Straightaway...
Monsieur de Gondremarck?
Himself.
Baron de Frascata was one of my friends.
- Have you read the letter? - Yes. - Is there an answer?
Come and see me in a few days.
- Why in a few days? - Because that's my wish.
I'll be revenged!
Monsieur.
Madame.
Major Edouard.
- All right? - Wonderful!
I'll leave you. I'm going to sort out dinner.
So, like that you're a major?
By Saint Crispin, I am!
And what exactly is a major?
- A major? - Yes.
A major? I've no idea.
There are different types.
First of all there's a sergeant major, a soldier whom people respect.
That's not me.
There's also a drum major. That's not me at all.
I don't have a drum.
Finally there's the major-domo.
That's me.
Ready to carve skilfully, ready to season tastily,
ready to pop off every cork, ready to pass the pickles round,
ready to fire off, on any subject, clever jests and witty quips,
in this line I take the lead, nobody can challenge my crown!
I am the major!
Wherever a delicious dinner is served the major is found.
I am the major!
Wherever there is gambling and cheating the major is found.
Yes, I cut and I carve and I toss up my glass.
I am the major, the major!
After dinner, I'm always in favour of a little card game,
whether baccarat or lansquenet, I have a pack ready in my pocket.
But it's above all at écarté that I'm known for my skill
and if there's a king to be turned up nobody can challenge my crown!
I am the major!
Wherever a delicious dinner is served the major is found.
I am the major!
Wherever there is gambling and cheating the major is found.
Yes, I cut and I carve and I toss up my glass.
I am the major, the major!
He's a cynic. We need to be careful.
- Hey! - What?
- Who did that to you? - Did what?
That!
- A bootmaker from Stockholm. - Take that off. - What?
- They're frightful! - But...
- I have the right to. - Why? - There's a proverb, monsieur.
- I'm going to make some boots from it. - He's mad!
And you'll see what it is!
Let me take your measurements.
But what's this major doing here?
- Well, major! - Look at these boots!
Watch your mouth, major!
Baron, here are the regulars.
'Tis with the sharpest of appetites that we walk into this place.
Dinner is served at the seventh hour,
nothing per head, it's rather cheap.
'Tis with the sharpest of appetites
that we walk into this place.
May I introduce you to Madame de Sainte-Amaranthe.
I pay homage to her beauty.
But why is her sad brow so clouded?
Yes, her sad brow,
why is it so clouded?
Why?
I'm the widow of a colonel
who died on the battlefield.
I keep at home, O eternal regret,
his helmet, under a glass.
Now I live in a hotel
but in such a way
that up there,
in the heavens above,
his last hunting ground,
he's happy, my colonel,
or so I should hope.
Are you happy, my colonel?
Are you happy, her colonel?
Eager to take my colonel's place
many a rash young fellow
has wooed me in such a tone
that I lost my temper.
I opposed such a stern refusal
when rejecting his prayer
that up there,
in the heavens above,
his last hunting ground,
he's happy, my colonel,
or so I should hope.
Are you happy, my colonel?
Are you happy, her colonel?
Ladies and gentlemen, dinner is served.
We're hungry!
Damn, that's what I was afraid of.
Look, monsieur:
God bless me if your guests aren't grossly underbred.
What do you expect to get when you're paying so little?
Quite so! Quite so!
By Saint Crispin!
Here we come and the walk has sharpened our appetite.
By Saint Crispin!
We're devilish hungry and want to start on our meal!
By Saint Crispin!
They came to ask me,
to ask me to dinner.
I replied straightaway that I was quite willing
provided it was good and didn't cost anything.
Let's eat!
Let's eat!
We're devilish hungry and want to start on our meal!
Let's go and eat!
Quickly, we must make haste to get everything shipshape
and ready for the visit of the noble foreigner!
Let's light up and prepare, yes, let's decorate these rooms!
Let's hurry!
- So, children, how are things going? - See for yourself, monsieur!
Looks fine. The chambermaid's quite charming!
It's taken you all that time to notice?
Now, do you all know what I want you to do?
I want a faithful replica of an evening in fashionable society.
- Eccentricity! - Distinction! - Glamour!
- Love! - Fame! - And beauty!
- Imagination! - Yes! Go and get dressed!
Monsieur, I have the impression that something will be missing.
Missing? What?
Since your servants are going to be your guests -
well, monsieur's whims are his own concern...
Be off, I no longer know... Ah, yes!
You won't have any servants
unless some guests turn up to play the servants' parts.
- Sorry? - That's true! - The game is up!
It could all be screwed up.
No, the game is not up!
You'll have your guests and you'll have your servants!
You'll see!
So I may rely on you?
Yes, you may rely on us!
Your parts will be difficult ones!
But not for such skilful artists!
The rubbish, the nonsense, the gossip and the cackle,
with which high society is ringing, are familiar to all servants.
They observe those they serve and the master who employs them
entertains them and pays them precisely to that end.
The highly amusing airs which many a pompous ***,
admired by all, puts on quite seriously, we'll put them on in jest.
- You'll put them on in jest! - We'll put them on in jest!
Therefore, please don't worry: if you want distinguished people
we'll produce and provide however many you need.
We'll let you have however many you need.
Rely on us, dear master, and don't worry!
When we appear, everyone will cry: Oh, how smart they are!
That's it, that's exactly it!
Ah, my friends, my dear friends!
Ah, how well you understood me!
Yes, we understood you perfectly!
Oh, we'll treat you to a gem of a little ball!
As for us, the ladies' maids, we'll adopt a fashionable tone,
high-and-mighty manners and bold, provocative airs.
Their all-conquering attires, we're the ones that produce them,
these gallivanting coquettes, we're the ones that dress them up.
To please you we'll proceed on quite a different course:
the countesses, our mistresses, we'll now undress them!
Therefore, please don't worry: if you want distinguished people
we'll produce and provide however many you need.
We'll let you have however many you need.
Rely on us, dear master, and don't worry!
When we appear, everyone will cry: Oh, how smart they are!
Oh, how smart they are!
Good evening, Bob!
How's your baroness?
This morning she wanted to see the Tir aux Pigeons:
"Come and collect me at three."
At half past three I turned up in a taxi.
The baroness appears... with her husband!
They say to me: "Take us to the Racing Club."
The Racing Club? My God, that's my club! I tell them:
"It's very select, they won't let you in."
"You're a guide. Sort it out!"
I swear to you, I was in such a state...
I talk the staff into letting them in:
"Wait there."
I stayed at the entrance, having an argument with the taxi,
while the whole of Paris passed by.
The horror of it! I saw Carcasson, Bonnivet, Pitou.
- Pitou's here? - Alas, yes!
There was Tristapatte, Lagingeole and Doublemar.
He's changed a lot, Doublemar.
- Good! Better late than never! - In short,
when the baron had finished looking for the pigeon shooting
he came out: "Take us to the Artillery Museum."
I didn't know where it was. Nor did the driver
whom I begged not to leave us on the other side of the Pont de Neuilly.
- Hell! - I took them to the BHV department store. On a Saturday!
- That's how my day went. - Poor fellow! - You said it!
- Also, has your baron received an invitation? - He has.
"Admiral Walter begs Monsieur de Gondremarck to do him the honour..."
- Who on earth is this Admiral Walter? - It's me!
I have a Swiss admiral's uniform I used only once.
- Perfect! Then my baron will have his evening out? - He will
but it won't be very grand, only thirteen people.
I'll send over Madame de Sainte-Amaranthe.
- Who's that? - She's my glover.
- Okay! Make yourself scarce! - Keep Gondremarck from leaving!
I'll tell Pauline to detain him.
Pauline?
- She's the chambermaid, very pretty. - In that case...
- Monsieur le Baron de Gondremarck. - I'll join the baroness.
And I'll get dressed.
Nobody. I'm early, it seems.
- Madame l'Amirale? - Shush!
- I beg your pardon? - Shush!
What about the admiral?
He's putting on his medals and I'm getting his.
I'm decidedly early, as always.
I didn't know if I should come.
Admiral Walter? I don't know at all.
The guide said: "Be off with you. That's all I have to say."
"Hasn't the baroness been invited?" - "You can take her if you want."
"But if I were you I wouldn't take her."
So I didn't bring her.
General Malaga de Puerto Rico!
Oho! Here's someone of note!
Hello! How goes it, signore?
Very good, general.
- Monsieur de Gondremarck. - You know me?
I know all the people who come here regularly
but I don't know you.
That's how I knew you!
Congratulations. Delighted to meet you!
How shrewd of you! Ah, these superior men!
Adhémar de Manchabal,
ultra-plenipotentiary minister, temporarily unattached!
Manchabal!
The ideal diplomat!
I'll introduce him to you.
I'll finally mix with my betters.
We'll discuss literature, science, hygiene.
- Your Excellency. - General. Sorry!
Allow me to introduce Baron de Gondremarck.
Delighted, insanely pleased. Sorry!
Prince de Manchabal, the leading diplomat of our time.
And now, you introduce me!
Sorry!
General Malaga de Puerto Rico, the leading tactician of our time.
Sorry!
Here I am with experts in their fields...
And the admiral?
Ah! The admiral!
The admiral!
Well, Baron, may we know what you think of Paris? Sorry.
It seems to me its wonders have been somewhat exaggerated.
Today I was shown the Artillery Museum at Les Invalides
in the Rue de Rivoli.
- Los Invalidès? - In the Rue de Rivoli?
- Sorry. - I thought it would have been quite different!
I saw any amount of cooking utensils but not one battery.
That was a department store, monsieur. You're insulting Napoleon's tomb!
Not Bonaparte!
I feel we're very close to a diplomatic incident. Sorry.
- Good gracious! - Gentlemen, I wasn't...
- Please. - You're lucky.
Here's Madame l'Amirale!
Madame l'Amirale!
- Monsieur de Gondremarck! - My dear friend!
I'm happy, monsieur, that you've deigned to choose my house
to make your début in Parisian high society.
Madame.
Here I'm in my element, so much the better!
What about the excellent admiral?
- He can't... - Why ever not?
He can't get into his uniform.
- Just a second! - What does that mean? - Coming!
You should get a move on...
The prince and the general have just left us in a most peculiar fashion.
Do you mind?
I? Not in the least!
- Such are the ladies of fashion! - Keep him here,
- that's what I was told! - Ah! The women of Paris!
Come and sit next to me.
Nearer...
Nearer still!
Where are you?
There.
Baron, I'm sure you have a low opinion of us.
- How can you! - Oh, yes! You're thinking:
Ah, these ladies of fashion, coquettes, spendthrifts, madwomen!
- No, not at all! - But whose fault is it?
It's the fault of this bloody modern society
that doesn't make enough room for women!
- Oh, as for that... - What?
As for insufficient room...
You're so funny!
If they knew... All this nonsense...
We need to dull our senses. We're suffering.
- Something's missing. - What?
- Why are you asking me? - I want to know.
Well, what we're missing,
what we've always dreamt about...
That look! Hey! Hey!
...and what I'd never encountered until today.
- I didn't say it. No! - Yes, you did!
Here's a man who doesn't want to leave.
I'm glad I didn't bring the baroness.
There you are, very close to me, I'm looking at you.
You don't give me the impression of a man
- who knows what love really is. - Me? Hardly!
Love is a huge ladder which starts on earth
and ends up in the sky.
Love, for one, is like a roaming cloud
floating off into the blue.
O lovely cloud, roaming around,
don't go without us...
...off to that delightful country!
Off there, far away, spreads that divine land
where one would like to live for ever.
Let's speed off
towards the promised land,
fair wind blowing!
Let's be off to the land of love!
Let's speed off
to the land of love!
O lovely cloud, roaming around,
don't go without us...
...off to that delightful country!
O lovely cloud,
take us with you.
Don't go without us.
Madame la Vicomtesse de la Pépinière.
- Somebody's coming! - I might have known!
Alone with you! Such happiness couldn't last!
Madame la Baronne de la Haute-Venue.
Madame la Marquise de la Farandole.
Madame la Baronne de Chevaleret.
Madame la Marquise de la Porte d'Orléans.
Madame la Vicomtesse de Balard-Créteil.
Madame la Baronne de Reuilly-Diderot.
Madame la Duchesse de Châtillon-Montrouge.
Madame la Baronne de la Porte de Saint-Cloud.
Monsieur le Baron de Gondremarck.
Baron.
Ladies.
General Malaga de Puerto Rico, already called!
Madame la Duchesse de Reuilly-Diderot.
Madame de Sainte-Amaranthe.
Madame, what a delightful coincidence!
- You know this lady? - Slightly.
I forbid you to look at her!
Madame.
Why, what dresses, ladies!
Vicomtesse, you're magnificent!
- What do you think, Baron? - Exquisite!
This is just what fascinated me today in the street.
All those women, those Parisian women,
walking along and jostling me.
I wanted to go to the Louvre but when I saw all these women
I completely forgot the Louvre.
Understandable.
The Parisians really are the only women who know how to go walking properly!
We'll go walking, we'll go out, go out on foot, not in a saloon car.
We'll at last be able to show something more than the tip of our boot!
Ah, what preparations, what dainty cares, what a to-do for the chambermaid!
She's ready at last, here she comes, the Parisian lady, armed cap à pie!
All who see her go mad
and feel here a kind of shock:
rustle, rustle, rustling goes her dress, tap, tap, tapping go her small feet!
Rustle, rustle, rustling goes her dress, tap, tap, tapping go her small feet!
Trotting along, with her nose in the air,
on she goes, straight in front of her.
When he meets her, every passer-by stops short and says:
God, how lovely she is!
She hears his praise and goes proudly on her way,
swaying and prancing along in a very special manner.
All who see her
go mad and feel a kind of shock:
rustle, rustle, rustling goes her dress, tap, tap, tapping go her small feet!
Rustle, rustle, rustling goes her dress, tap, tap, tapping go her small feet!
Ah! Mesdames, Messieurs!
- What is it, Prince? - If only you knew! How horrible!
I beg you, tell us.
The admiral! Here's the admiral!
God bless you, gentlemen.
I finally managed to get into my uniform.
Monsieur de Gondremarck, my dear.
Ah, the dear baron.
Your coat is split down the back!
Your coat is split down the back!
My coat is split down the back?
Yes, his coat is split down the back!
It spoils his nice costume.
But these are noble rags!
- He may very well catch cold! - Baron, calm down if you please!
- Yes, but his coat is split! - Oh, well, his coat is split!
- Really, his coat is split! - What? Is his coat split?
Baron, calm down if you please!
Come now, Baron!
Yes, your coat is split down the back!
My God, my dear Admiral!
General, ring for supper.
Oh, ring...
- Why ring? - If we ring
the servants will come.
- We shan't be able to relax. - True.
When there're servants around we have to control ourselves.
- It's all lies with servants! - Whereas when there aren't any...
...one can do what one wants.
- Let's sack our servants. - That's it.
Let's sack them, let's sack them!
Get lost, servants, get lost!
There, they've gone.
We'll serve ourselves.
It's funny.
Let's go and fetch the table, friends.
Baron, go and fetch the table!
What? Me?
I beg you.
Oh, well.
The baron mustn't leave this house.
- How shall we keep him here? - Let's make him tipsy!
What a brilliant idea!
It can't do any harm.
Let's sup, let's sup, the time has come
and let's try to sup merrily!
Let's not get started all at once, let's go softly, piano, piano.
It's silly to hurry unduly. "Chi va piano va sano."
- Take my arm, madame. - I accept, Baron.
May I be so bold as to claim...
I'll not repulse you.
The Countess is divine!
Ah, for shame, Admiral!
Will you take me, Marquise?
My pleasure, General!
Let's not get started all at once, let's go softly, piano, piano.
It's silly to hurry unduly. "Chi va piano va sano."
Let's draw up our plan of battle: over there, what are you getting tipsy on?
On burgundy!
- What about you? - On champagne!
- What about you? - On claret!
- What about the baron? - I'll get tipsy on everything!
This reply is in good taste!
If we really want to have fun,
as we get tipsy, we must, Marquises,
we must talk a lot of nonsense!
We'll talk a lot of nonsense!
As I struggled into my uniform I saw it wasn't complete.
I noticed ( what a ghastly loss! ) I hadn't got my plumed hat!
Let's sing the praises of our hosts: both of them know how to delight us.
One of them helps us to drinks and the other, she helps us to love!
There it goes!
Everything is dancing round, round, round and I'm already losing my head!
Losing my head!
I willingly take my time when I'm helped to good wine.
I strike roots wherever I'm watered, like a flower in a garden.
I'm at a loss to explain why in Paris they drink
bad wine in great big glasses and good wine in tiny little ones!
There it goes!
Everything is dancing round, round, round and I'm already losing my head!
Losing my head!
Your health, Baron!
Your health, Baron!
Your health, Baron!
Your health, Baron!
Ah, ladies, I'll drink to you all!
To the Marquise!
To the Duchess!
To the Baroness!
To the Countess!
Baron, I'll drink a health
and that health is none but yours!
Admiral, give me your hand. Your wife is truly beautiful!
Your health, Baron!
By God, I'll drink to you all!
He's tipsy!
He's tipsy, quite tipsy!
He's tipsy!
I not tipsy,
but you all tipsy!
He's tipsy, quite tipsy!
There's one thing about drinking
at which I can't help wondering, my friends:
why on earth must one be loaded
in order to take things lightly?
He's tipsy!
I not tipsy!
He's tipsy!
Everything is going round.
Everything is dancing round.
Everything is dancing round, round, round and I'm already losing my head!
Losing my head!
Off it goes with a ***, let everyone rush off and let's have a ball!
Champagne!
With well scrubbed, clean-shaven faces,
with well oiled, carefully curled hair,
spruce and dashing, *** and span, smart and discreet,
come midnight, the merry hour,
come midnight, the loving hour,
we serve in the private rooms.
While waiting for the crowd
that the Opéra will bring here this evening,
inwardly digest
the excellent advice that Urbain is going to give you.
Let's inwardly digest
the excellent advice that Urbain is going to give us.
You must, above all, be mysterious and reserved!
You must never reveal you know the gentlemen you're serving.
If sometimes, on an actress's arm,
a grave-looking man slips in here
close your eyes,
let's not disturb lovers.
Let's close our eyes,
let's not disturb lovers!
Sometimes the door won't open,
in such a case you must beware.
The clumsy waiter will insist but the clever one will give up!
Just scatter away, without knocking,
and when you come back later on
close your eyes,
let's not disturb lovers.
Let's close our eyes,
let's not disturb lovers!
Well! Monsieur de Gondremarck!
That face...
You're not mistaken:
it's me, Puerto Rico.
Have things improved since?
You certainly had a good laugh.
What are you doing here now?
After old Madame Quimper-Karadec had us thrown out
we had to retrain.
I came here on the recommendation of Monsieur de Bobinet.
The admiral... You had a good laugh.
Well, I need a private room. I'm expecting someone.
- Who? - That's no business of yours.
Be off with you!
Mademoiselle Métella.
What?
- Waiter! - Madame?
In a moment, a lady will come and ask for me.
I see.
- Ah, Métella! - Wait. - What's wrong?
I've just met a young man.
A young man?
I remember I loved him to distraction
and I can't remember his name.
- Have I upset you? - No.
You're surprised?
A little.
There I was, my heart brimming with tenderness,
and from the very first word you annihilate me!
Oh, you'll hear many a worse thing!
- Really? - Baron,
we're in a fashionable restaurant and midnight has just struck.
This is the place, feared by all mothers,
the horrendous place where underage sons
come to blow the money earned by their fathers
and to chip away at their sisters' dowries!
Midnight is striking, listen,
believe and take heed.
On the stroke of midnight the party begins:
many a coupé comes to a stop and out of it step
handsome gentlemen and charming ladies
who come, all dolled up, to have some fun!
The pick of the bunch, blondes and brunettes
and, needless to say, redheads, too!
The handsome gentlemen are from all classes.
You'll find here rather a mixed bag,
yes!
All these people become more animated and make merry.
Silk dresses rustle along the corridors.
There goes the adagio of the bacchanalia
and its harsh voice rumbles every night!
Shrill peals of laughter, gushing champagne,
a card game here, a dance over there,
and the squeaky piano accompanies
with familiar tunes rather strange frolics.
The noise grows and grows, turns into a storm.
Youth enjoys itself, singing at the top of its voice!
Is it pleasure or is it fury?
They'll talk and scream as long as they can.
And when they no longer can they'll keep silent,
gaiety vanishes little by little.
One person sleeps standing up, another lies on the floor
and that's how the party ends.
When morning comes, when dawn breaks
some people are left but the gaiety has gone!
Last night's high-livers are all ill at ease
and they're asking for tee at the Grand Seize!
At last away they go, ashen-faced,
intoxicated with champagne and false love,
and the street sweeper stops and looks at them
and shouts: Hey there, today's lucky people!
I also came here to have some fun. My answer, Métella,
- did you forget? - No. - Is it yes?
- No, it's no. - No? - No.
- That's impossible! - No, it isn't.
Listen, Baron. Do you want my heart?
Well, yes.
For the time being, my heart isn't free. I'm head over heels in love!
- So what! - If I gave myself to you it'd be out of vexation.
Then you surely wouldn't want me!
Of course I would! That's how we are in the north! Look here, Métella!
I said no.
I'd never have thought
that a stranger arriving in Paris with good references...
You're behaving shamefully, abominably!
- Take it easy. - I'll say as much to everyone in Stockholm!
Madame, it's the woman.
She's over there.
- Are you cross with me? - A mere trifle!
You aren't as wretched as you think. I've brought a friend.
Do I look like somebody you can fob off on your friends?
- Baron! - Frascata warned me. Never let friends be fobbed off on you!
Keep quiet, here she is!
- I don't know that woman. - Here she is, the friend.
Do you understand now why I got you to come here?
Yes, I understand and I don't know how to thank you.
She must be hideous, I'm sure.
- Baron, I'll leave you with madame. - You're leaving me?
I'm going to find the young man I was telling you about.
- I now remember his name! - What is it?
Raoul de Gardefeu!
Raoul de Gardefeu!
Ah, it's the friend. I'd forgotten her.
- You're the friend and you want to eat? - Yes.
Don't worry, you'll eat.
Ah!
She seems contented... Must be some time ago...
Urbain, this poor woman needs something,
something nourishing.
Some good soup.
- If only I knew where Gardefeu was. - He'll be here in a moment
- for the Brazilian's ball. - So will I!
- You're leaving? - I'll be back! To us two!
- Run after my husband! - Your husband? Poor lady!
He's coming back. Just wait for him over there.
- But where? - Quick, madame! Here they are! Yes!
On you go, young ladies, on you go, you high-livers!
On you go, little minxes, you'll hear some sweet words.
Here we all come, happy and in love,
and off we shall all go, tipsy and delighted.
Here we all come, happy and in love!
My dear friends, may I introduce
a glover, once full of innocence,
who forsakes for my sake twenty years of modesty.
The blonde is yours!
At noon yesterday the glover saw a Brazilian walk into her shop.
He asked her: Will you please, glover, sell some gloves to a Brazilian?
Such is my trade, the glover said. What colour, handsome Brazilian?
A dark blood-red, delightful glover, was the Brazilian's retort.
- Your hand, please? said the glover. - Here it is! replied the Brazilian.
And in the glover's little hand the Brazilian's hand was shaking.
Let's get this straight, pretty glover, said the Brazilian suddenly.
The gloves far less than the glover have attracted the Brazilian.
Leave! cried the glover. Leave, fascinating Brazilian!
Do you then, you cruel glover, want the Brazilian to die?
- A smile from his dear glover... - ...soon revived the Brazilian.
And this is how the glover saved the Brazilian's life!
Finally! You're the last to arrive. Supper is served!
- Let's go and sup then. - One moment...
What does the Swede still want?
- Where's Monsieur de Gardefeu? - There!
- We have an account to settle. - At your disposal.
- They're going to fight! - Don't worry.
We'll just sort out this little business.
Be off with you!
Bob, do you want to take charge of this?
Of course.
I'm a foreigner, monsieur, and so are you.
- So am I. - Dare I then
ask you, as my compatriot, to second me?
My pleasure! Look: I've got everything we need.
Hey! Let's see first of all who's complaining?
Good God, it's me!
- Don't swear! - Holy *** of Guadeloupe!
- What's the trouble? - Yes, what?
- Answer! - I'll tell you.
- It's monsieur here. - Me? - Yes.
At the station you passed yourself off as a guide
and you took me back to your place.
And you felt ill at his place?
No, that's not the problem.
- What, then? - Yes, what?
He led me to believe I'd been invited into high society
and sent me to your place!
- Tell me, were you bored at my place? - No,
that wouldn't be polite, wouldn't be true.
Perhaps you were entertained?
- Like mad! - So what's the trouble?
That's true! I was truly entertained...
No, really! This is too much!
My friend, at the station, says to himself:
Here's an unfortunate stranger, who'll be duped, robbed and cheated.
He takes you to his place and offers board and lodging.
He introduces you to me and you complain?
- Wasn't the champagne good? - It was very good!
And the admiral's wife! Very good, too...
It's true! On closer inspection
I've got no reason to complain.
- Everything's settled, then? - Oh, no, not at all!
I've got the pistols. I want to fight.
I'll wash away this insult with blood.
You're a parvenu! Just leave us alone.
What? What did you say?
This insult will be washed away in blood!
Give me your pistols.
- No! - Yes!
- Don't fight! - My wife! - Yes! - Damn!
- Can you forgive me? - Yes, but let's go.
Do you understand now? All I did...
- You did because you loved me? - Yes.
- Ah, Métella! - Métella, I've just had an idea.
- What? - I'll be in love with you again!
A capital idea!
Ah, Métella !
In our songs and our shouts let's praise Paris!
Let's praise Paris!
If you were to search the city you might find, I believe,
a few peaceful houses full of respectable bourgeois.
These worthy characters are not at all like us.
They say they're wise, we say they're crazy.
And crash, ***, wallop!
Yes, such is Parisian life,
endless pleasure and enjoyment!
Yes, such is Parisian life,
there it is, there is happiness!
Lovers and mistresses who, laughing, love each other!
Oaths and promises swept away by the wind!
Songs full of chatter, kisses taken and given back,
bottles full of sparkle, bring forth all the best wines!
And crash, ***, wallop!
Yes, such is Parisian life, endless pleasure and enjoyment!
Yes, such is Parisian life, there it is, there is happiness!
Straying husbands brought back to the fold.
Model seducers fooled and comforted.
Tragedies and comedies unfolding as best they can
and after such follies a general amnesty!
And crash, ***, wallop!
Yes, such is Parisian life,
endless pleasure and enjoyment!
Yes, such is Parisian life, there it is, there is happiness!
Off it goes with a ***!
Let go of everything!