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Fun fact!
1 in 7 new marriages is an interracial marriage,
which is 2 times the rate of what it was in 1967
when interracial marriage first became legal.
Racism is still a problem.
So it's no surprise that those struggles bleed into our relationships.
Let's talk about the three most common issues you all emailed me about.
Well honey, I'm just not really sure what you expected.
You're the one that decided to date one of those towelheads.
I don't really get it, I mean I guess I just have different taste.
You already know how I feel about those kind of people.
I mean I'm not really attracted to asian guys.
I don't want you bringing your gildfriend here anymore.
Look I know you've been dating that guy, I can not remember his name,
but I found you a different one, OK?
And he doesn't smell funny.
It's hard not to feel validated or supported
or to feel like your friends and family are... bad people.
Find ways to be surrounded by people who support you,
build your network as a couple with warm accepting people
who you feel comfortable around.
Hopefully, you have at least a few.
As a couple, talk openly about this when it comes up
and stick up for each other in the face of prejudice.
Depending on your situation,
you may actually wanna say something to your friends and family
about their racism.
They may not realize they're doing it.
Keep it mind it may be something that has to come up many times
and also in my experience, people who are being hurtful and problematic
won't usually acknowledge it or take responsability.
So, there is that.
What's up, my n****s?
I'm so glad your name is not like Shikwanda Rafifi or something, you know, that would be so unattractive!
I love your chinky little eyes, they're so cute!
Just like cause it's more normal, you know.
Come shoot some n****s on Call of Duty with me!
Can I call you my little chinkster ?
You know I don't mean it the racist way !
Sensitive ***.
Racism that comes up within relationships
is usually a lot more subtle.
Just as oppressive gender roles or ablism will crop up
in even the most egalitarian relationships,
racism make crop up too.
Nobody can completely escape their cultural programming
which includes many prejudices.
Lots of people forget, as people will, to check the privileges they have
because of their skin colour.
One of the best things we can do in this situations is to talk about it,
bring privilege up, bring power dynamics because of race up.
The goal is to be totally aware of it.
If your partner calls you out or says something about it,
don't take it personnally.
It's a process and progress means making mistakes.
A handful of times, I got emails from women of colour whose partners are into some kind of race fetish.
In a lot of *** sites, there's usually categories:
"asian", "latina", "ebony"...
This type of *** takes a racial stereotype and then sexualizes it.
I personnaly don't believe in fantasy policing,
but if you're basing your relationship with this person on some sort of racial fetish
or expect them to carry out your fantasies for you,
nuh huh.
Those are false expectations and it's a recipe for failure in a relationship.
It's also incredibly dehumanizing to your partner.
So, there you go !
I'm Laci Green, thanks for watching my sex+ videos.
You're a frequent viewer and we're not friends on facebook. Why ?
I got new stuff for you all week so add me !
Or like me.
Please like me !
I love you all, I will see you next Saturday.
Transcript : Emilie