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-Worst game ever!
-Hey, everybody.
Jon Brence here with ogeeku.com.
Today we're going to be jumping into a game which
is based one of my favorite films
from childhood, "ET, The Extraterrestrial."
Now of course, it made total sense for Atari
to acquire the rights to make the game back in 1982.
I think it cost them about $20 million
for the rights and another additional $100 million
to produce this game, so of course you
know with at budget like that, the game
is going to be fantastic, right?
Well, critics have said otherwise.
But you know what?
I've never played the game, and I
figure let's give it a shot here on the air.
So let's do this.
Let's bring up the game screen.
[THEME SONG PLAYING]
Awesome.
Same music.
Laaaa!
Wait.
That's not how the music goes.
Doo doooo do duh do do doooo.
All right, so we're off to a good start.
The music just loops a karaoke version.
All right, let's hop in the game.
ET's landing his pink ship, and I got a score of 9999.
That goes down when I move, OK.
Hey, it's Elliott.
And-- OK, I'm in a hole.
OK, I got to stay away from the dark green spots.
We're good.
Elliott has transformed into a guy with a cap, apparently.
Back in the hole.
All right.
So it's a very touchy hit box system.
Oh, my God!
I wasn't even on it!
OK, we're good.
Let's get up out of the hole.
There we go.
Let's collect this.
Yes, I got one of something.
In the forest.
Let's go this way, ET.
So, you can't go off the side of the map.
OK, let's go up here.
All right, we're good.
I got two.
I got two things.
Still a little confused as to where I'm supposed to go.
I'm in another hole.
I think somebody should tell the city department regarding that.
Get them fixed.
OK, cool.
Let's got another one.
Got three.
I'm in another hole.
[HUMMING THEME MUSIC]
There we go, I got four.
No!
No, no, no!
Let go of me!
Come on!
I'm in Greece, apparently.
All right.
And this guy with the cap, I don't like the way
that he looks.
I'm in a hole.
Oh, what's this?
I just collected a C. Whatever the C is.
Ahhh!
OK.
And I'm back in Greece.
Let's get another one of those little dots.
I'm guessing those are parts for my ship?
Is this like ToeJam & Earl?
All right, so let's go up this way.
No, buddy, I don't like him.
And I'm in another hole.
What's this?
This looks different.
And it's pretty creepy.
It's a smiley face.
Ahhhh!
That is really creepy.
OK, well, let's-- oh!
Oh, I made a dandelion.
Can I eat it?
OK, I can't do anything with it.
Let's get out of the hole.
All right.
Oh, my God!
OK.
These holes are starting to make me angry.
Son of a ***!
Get up!
Stay up here.
No-- there we go.
I have six now, six of whatever.
I'm in another ***' hole.
Doo doodle ooo do dooo doo!
Son of a ***!
Get out of the ***' hole!
[SINGING] Stay out of that hole, and stay away from that guy!
OK, that was a glitch.
Ahhh!
All right.
OK, I'm still flying.
OK, good.
Here we go, let's get seven.
Awesome.
OK, what is that?
I just collected another C. Awesome.
Maybe I have to get like other parts,
like a C might be like Zelda keys.
I got eight.
All right, we're doing good.
Son of a *** holes.
Uhhh!
I got three, three, three something left and something.
Oh, my God!
Really?
Oh, son of a-- all right, so he's going away.
He stole something.
No, no, no!
No, no!
No, let go, let go!
Ahhhh!
I'm back in Greece.
I got nine, though.
I've got nine.
About to get 10.
What the-- I have no idea what's going on right now.
No!
Oh, my God.
OK, this is getting frustrating.
Go, go, go.
Let's get that.
Whoa!
Whoa, whoa!
What happened!
Why'd I lose all my stuff?
Did I fall too much?
What the *** is this?
Now I have 2,000 left, whatever that means.
I think there are so many steps you can take?
Oh, my God!
Go.
Go up.
Son of a ***!
Go!
Oh, my God.
Oh, son of-- oh, fu-- OK, watch the curses, Jon.
[SINGING] Watch the curses on air.
All right, we got three.
Got a super long neck.
Go, go, go.
I got 700 left.
Can I call for my ship?
No?
God damn it!
Oh, my God!
Oh fu-- [MUMBLING] For ***'s sake!
Ahhh!
OK, I got 200 left.
Son of a-- and I'm dead.
And back to life.
OK, I'm done with this.
*** this game.
*** this game.
*** it in the A.
So there you have it.
That's ET.
If you liked today's episode, be sure to like,
subscribe, and comment below with what game
you'd like to see me play next.
Who signed off on that piece of ***?