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SO WHO ELSE IS GONNA BE THERE?
UH, SOME SHEIKHS, DIPLOMATS, MAYBE A LESSER AYATOLLAH.
IT'S A VERITABLE MIDDLE-EASTERN POTPOURRI.
WOW.
A LATE-NIGHT EMERGENCY TRIP TO WASHINGTON D.C.
IT'S--IT'S CRAZY. DID THEY GIVE YOU AN AGENDA YET?
HEY, DIDN'T YOU QUIT BEING MY COMMUNICATIONS DIRECTOR?
YEAH, I DID, BUT I DIDN'T QUIT BEING YOUR WIFE.
(chuckles) OKAY. UH, AGENDA--BREAKFAST,
WE, UH, SUGGEST THAT THEY INCREASE OIL PRODUCTION,
LUNCH, WE ASK THEM TO INCREASE OIL PRODUCTION,
DINNER, WE BEG THEM TO INCREASE OIL PRODUCTION.
AND IN THE MEANTIME,
WE'RE BEING DRIVEN AROUND WASHINGTON D.C. IN A HUMMER.
MM. YOU KNOW WHAT? MAYBE-- MAYBE I SHOULD JUST GO WITH YOU.
YOU KNOW, JUST TO KEEP YOU COMPANY.
IT'LL BE NICE. WE COULD--
I WAS HOPING THAT YOU WOULD FILL IN FOR ME
AT THE CHILDREN'S LITERACY BREAKFAST TOMORROW MORNING.
OH, WELL, OKAY, BUT I COULD STILL FLY OUT RIGHT AFTER THAT.
YOU'D HATE IT. I'D BE IN MEETINGS THE WHOLE TIME.
YOU'D BE STUCK IN AN APARTMENT.
YOU KNOW, IT'S-- IT'S ALL THE SAME, ROBERT.
I EITHER WAIT FOR YOU THERE OR I WAIT HERE FOR A-A BABY. IT'S--
HEY... WE'RE GONNA GET CHOSEN,
AND OBSESSING ON IT IS NOT GONNA MAKE IT HAPPEN ANY QUICKER.
(scoffs) I'M NOT OBSESSING ABOUT IT.
I'M--I'M--I'M JUST CONCERNED, PREOCCUPIED.
I'M WORRIED. I'M...
OKAY, DEFINE "OBSESSING."
I WISH I COULD STAY AND DISTRACT YOU.
BUT THE FATE OF OUR INTERNAL COMBUSTION ENGINES
HANGS IN THE BALANCE.
I-I KNOW.
JUST TRY TO STAY BUSY.
RIGHT.
RIGHT, BUSY.
♪♪
(man speaking indistinctly)
♪♪
MM.
MM.
WAKE UP, SWEETIE. IT'S TIME FOR DINNER.
(chuckles)
WHOA.
COULDN'T FIND MY CLOTHES.
AND PLUS, I DIDN'T WANT TO GIVE YOUR NEW NEIGHBORS A SHOW, SO...
I MADE YOU A PEANUT BUTTER AND JELLY.
OOH, WITH THE CRUSTS OFF. NICE.
HMM.
I REALLY CAN'T TAKE YOU SERIOUSLY IN THAT ROBE.
(laughs)
WELL, I GUESS I HAVE NO CHOICE THEN.
I'M GOING COMMANDO.
I DON'T KNOW IF THAT'S GONNA MAKE IT EASIER TO TALK TO YOU.
WE'LL SEE.
AND YOUR CLOTHES ARE IN THE LAUNDRY ROOM.
OOH. THE LAUNDRY ROOM.
MM-HMM.
MM.
(sighs)
SO WHAT ARE YOUR PLANS FOR TOMORROW?
MM, MY MOM HAS TO BE UP AT THE VINEYARD
FOR A COUPLE OF DAYS,
SO I JUST NEED TO CHECK HER MESSAGES.
WHY?
WELL, IT'S NO BIG DEAL. IT'S JUST, UM...
I HAVE MY NARCOTICS ANONYMOUS MEETING TOMORROW,
AND THERE'S A CEREMONY
CELEBRATING OUR SOBRIETY ANNIVERSARIES.
IT'S ALREADY BEEN A YEAR?
GIVE OR TAKE A WEEK.
GOD, I CAN'T BELIEVE LAST YEAR,
I WAS LITERALLY LOCKED IN A ROOM
WITH KEVIN AND TOMMY, PUKING MY GUTS OUT.
AND NOW I'M SOBER,
AND THEY CAN'T BE WITHIN A MILE OF EACH OTHER.
A LOT HAPPENS IN A YEAR.
YEAH, TELL ME ABOUT IT.
YOU'RE NOW LAYING IN MY BED COMMANDO.
WHOOPS. (laughs)
(laughs)
IS EVERYONE GOING?
I MEAN, EVERYONE'S PRETTY BUSY. IT'S NO BIG DEAL.
I MEAN, I'M JUST GETTING MY YEAR CHIP
AND GIVING A REALLY LAME SPEECH.
OF COURSE I'LL GO WITH YOU.
REALLY?
AND THANK YOU FOR INVITING ME.
I KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR YOU
TO TALK ABOUT THIS STUFF, SO...
YOU'RE WELCOME.
MM.
THANK YOU.
FOR?
FOR TONIGHT AND THIS AFTERNOON...
YESTERDAY AFTERNOON...
AND YESTERDAY MORNING...
AND THE LAUNDRY ROOM.
MM. I LOVE THAT LAUNDRY ROOM.
(laughs)
♪♪
PLEASE COME WITH ME.
NO. HOW DO YOU LIKE THE SOUP?
I WANT THE RECIPE.
AND WHY WON'T YOU COME WITH ME TO TALK TO THE LAFFERTYS?
COME ON, NORA, BECAUSE YOU'RE PLANNING
TO KNOCK ON A PERFECT STRANGER'S DOOR
AND INFORM HIM THAT HIS DEAD WIFE WAS UNFAITHFUL
AND THAT HIS SON RYAN IS NOT HIS BIOLOGICAL SON.
WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD I WANT TO GO WITH YOU?
BECAUSE I DON'T WANT TO GO BY MYSELF.
SAUL, YOU KNOW I WOULDN'T DO THIS IF I HAD A CHOICE,
BUT IF I DON'T TALK TO THEM, THEN HOLLY WILL,
AND YOU AND I BOTH KNOW THAT IF SHE DOES,
SHE'LL FIND A WAY TO INFLICT MAXIMUM DAMAGE ON OUR FAMILY
JUST OUT OF SPITE.
PLEASE COME WITH ME.
WE'LL FIND A WAY TO TALK TO THEM AND BREAK THE NEWS
TO THEM GENTLY AND WITH COMPASSION.
YOU REMEMBER I TOLD YOU ABOUT REBECCA
GENTLY AND WITH COMPASSION?
NORA, JUST LEAVE IT ALONE.
OH, RIGHT, AND NEVER GET ANOTHER WINK OF SLEEP
WAITING FOR HOLLY TO SPREAD HER VENOM?
THIS WAS NOT AN IDLE BLUFF.
I JUST DON'T WANT THIS FAMILY TO SUFFER THE CONSEQUENCES
OF ANY MORE OF WILLIAM'S MORAL LAPSES.
WELL, WHY DON'T YOU JUST ASK ONE OF THE KIDS TO GO WITH YOU?
ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
IF THEY FIND OUT WHAT I'M DOING,
THEY'LL BE ALL OVER THAT POOR FAMILY.
I'LL HAVE ANOTHER ITALIAN OPERA ON MY HANDS.
SAUL, COME ON, PLEASE.
I-I THOUGHT I COULD COUNT ON YOU.
YOU CAN COUNT ON ME, JUST NOT FOR THIS.
(door closes)
HEY.
HEY.
ARE YOU ON YOUR WAY OUT?
IN A MINUTE, TO DO SOME ERRANDS.
OH.
WHATCHA GOT?
UH, SWAG FROM A CHILDREN'S LITERACY CONFERENCE.
I WAS ON LOVELY WIFE DUTY.
"SENATOR McCALLISTER CAN'T BE WITH US TODAY.
"SO IN HIS PLACE,
I'D LIKE YOU TO WELCOME HIS LOVELY WIFE KITTY."
AND THEN I SMILE AT SEA OF DISAPPOINTED FACES.
UGH. WILLIAM WOULD DO THAT.
HE WOULD AGREE TO ATTEND SOME EVENT, AND THEN--
AND THEN HE'D GET CALLED AWAY AT THE LAST MINUTE,
AND I WOULD HAVE TO GO IN HIS PLACE ALL BY MYSELF.
I HATED IT.
NOW I REALIZE HE WAS PROBABLY OFF DIDDLING HOLLY
OR CONNIE LAFFERTY OR GOD KNOWS WHO.
UGH. AT--AT LEAST ROBERT IS AWAY
TALKING TO WORLD LEADERS.
IT'S NOT QUITE THE SAME.
NO.
PLUS, LOOK AT THIS. I GOT A GOODY BAG OUT OF IT.
OH.
LET'S SEE WHAT WE HAVE...
(clicks tongue) MM.
WHAT?
OH, HONEY, YOUR FAVORITE BOOK.
YEAH. YEAH, I KNOW.
YOU KNOW WHAT? MAYBE I'LL GIVE IT TO ELIZABETH.
DO YOU KNOW IF SHE HAS IT?
YEAH, SHE HAS IT,
AND SO DOES PAIGE AND SO DOES COOPER.
IT'S THE STANDARD GRANDMOTHER GIFT.
WELL, IS THERE ANY REASON YOU'RE NOT KEEPING IT
FOR YOUR OWN BABY?
IT WOULD FEEL LIKE WE WERE TEMPTING FATE.
I MEAN, WE HAVEN'T EVEN BEEN CHOSEN BY A BIRTH MOTHER YET,
AND I... I DON'T WANT TO-- I DON'T WANT TO JINX ANYTHING.
WELL, THEN WHY DON'T YOU
LET ME KEEP IT FOR YOU UNTIL YOU'RE READY?
OKAY.
OKAY.
OKAY. OKAY.
(drums on counter)
OH, GOD. GOD. I HATE BEING AT SUCH LOOSE ENDS.
I'M UNEMPLOYED,
MY BOOK IS GLACIALLY GOING THROUGH THE PUBLISHING PROCESS,
I'M MISSING ROBERT AND I'M IN BABY LIMBO,
AND THERE'S NOT A DAMN THING THAT I CAN DO ABOUT IT.
I JUST--I JUST--NO, THANKS. I DON'T WANT A CHERRY.
YOU KNOW, I'M VERY GOOD AT SOLVING PROBLEMS HEAD-ON.
BUT I'M NOT GOOD AT WAITING AROUND.
YOU KNOW...
YOU COULD ALWAYS COME WITH ME IF YOU WANTED,
ON MY ERRANDS.
WELL, YEAH, YEAH.
I DON'T--I DON'T HAVE ANYTHING BETTER TO DO.
REALLY?
SURE.
(Kitty) WE DROVE AN HOUR OUT OF PASADENA
TO BUY FRUIT?
THIS IS A HIDDEN GEM.
THEY'RE FAMOUS FOR THEIR ARTICHOKES.
MOM, WE OWN A PRODUCE COMPANY.
WELL, HOW DO YOU THINK I FOUND OUT ABOUT THIS?
ONLY CHEFS AND INSIDERS KNOW ABOUT THIS ONE.
WILL YOU LOOK AT THOSE MELONS?
MOM, COME ON. WHAT'S--WHAT'S GOING ON?
WHAT? WHY?
WE HAVE BEEN TO A VERY SPECIAL, OUT-OF-THE-PLACE DRY CLEANERS,
A DRUG STORE IN SANTA CLARITA WHERE THEY SUPPOSEDLY KNOW YOU,
ONLY NOBODY WHO KNOWS YOU WAS WORKING TODAY,
AND NOW WE'RE HERE.
SO JUST COME ON AND--AND TELL ME
WHERE WE REALLY ARE GOING, OKAY?
KITTY, YOU KNOW HOW I'VE ALWAYS RELIED ON YOUR STRENGTH
AND WIS--
(stammers)
I SEE THROUGH FLATTERY.
HOLLY THREATENED ME.
WE'RE RUNNING AWAY FROM HOLLY?
NO, HOLLY THREATENED TO TALK TO RYAN LAFFERTY
AND HIS FAMILY ABOUT HIS PATERNITY.
OH, NO. OH...
I HAVE TO TALK TO THEM BEFORE--
WE'RE GOING TO BAKERSFIELD? WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME?
BECAUSE I WAS PUT IN AN UNTENABLE POSITION AND I--
OH, THIS IS UNBELIEVABLE.
I JUST DIDN'T WANT TO DO THIS BY MYSELF,
AND THEN YOU OFFERED, KITTY.
YOU SAID YOU LIKE TO SOLVE PROBLEMS HEAD-ON.
DO THEY EVEN KNOW---SHH. DO THEY EVEN KNOW THAT WE'RE COMING?
NOT--NOT--NO.
THIS IS REALLY UNBELIEVABLE.
YOU SAID THAT ALREADY.
WELL, MOM, HOW ON EARTH ARE WE EVEN GONNA TELL THEM?
I MEAN, WHAT ARE WE POSSIBLY GOING TO SAY?
DOES THIS MEAN YOU'LL GO WITH ME?
LOOK AROUND, MOTHER. I'M IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE.
WHAT--WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?
WELL--
NO, NO, NO, JUST-- LET'S JUST GO.
WHAT--WHAT'S THE PLAN?
I DON'T REALLY HAVE ONE.
I WAS HOPING SOMETHING WOULD COME TO ME
WHEN HE OPENED THE DOOR.
UNBELIEVABLE.
YOU SAID THAT ALREADY.
WE NEED MORE.
I DON'T THINK WE NEED MORE CHOCOLATE CHIPS.
VANILLA. WHAT ARE YOU UP TO NOW, HONEY?
I'M MAKING BABY GREEN SEA TURTLES.
THEY'RE TRYING TO GET IN THE WATER
BEFORE THE BIRDS EAT THEM.
OH, CHEERY.
OKAY, YOU TWO, AFTER I GET THIS MUFFIN MIX IN THE OVEN,
YOU GUYS NEED TO GO BRUSH YOUR TEETH, GET READY FOR SCHOOL.
EVA'S MOM'S GONNA BE HERE SOON,
AND I GOTTA GET READY FOR A JOB INTERVIEW.
YOU'RE GOING BACK TO WORK?
OH, IF I GET THIS JOB.
OH.
I DON'T HAVE A CHOICE, HONEY. I GOTTA WORK.
BUT THIS JOB WOULD BE GREAT
BECAUSE I WOULD BE ABLE TO WORK FROM HOME
SO YOU'D SEE A LOT MORE OF ME
THAN WHEN I WAS WORKING AT OJAI.
PROMISE? 'CAUSE YOU SAID YOU'D HELP ME WITH MY DIORAMA,
BUT IT'S NOT FINISHED.
I WILL, HONEY. I PROMISE.
BUT WHAT IF YOUR BOSS WANTS YOU TO WORK LONG HOURS?
(timer beeps)
WELL, IT'S NOT THAT KIND OF JOB.
MY HEADHUNTER TOLD ME THAT I WOULD BE ABLE TO SET
MY OWN SCHEDULE.
YOU KNOW A HEADHUNTER?
YEAH, AND I'M GONNA GET HIM OVER HERE
IF YOU DON'T GO BRUSH YOUR TEETH.
(giggles)
I CAN'T BELIEVE I'VE NEVER BEEN HERE. THIS PLACE IS FANTASTIC.
WELL, COZY IS WHAT THE REALTORS SAY.
OH, MY GOD. (laughs) THIS PILLOW IS...
I KNOW. IT'S SO GAY.
I WAS GONNA SAY FANTASTIC.
YOU WANT, UH, YOU WANT SOME COFFEE?
ALREADY CAFFEINATED, BUT THANKS.
LISTEN, UM, I WANTED TO SEE WHAT YOU WERE UP TO THIS AFTERNOON.
UH, NOTHING MUCH.
JUST CATCHING UP ON ROBERT'S VOTING RECORD.
YOU KNOW, TRYING TO GET UP TO SPEED
BEFORE I START THE NEW JOB.
COOL. WELL, UM, I WAS HOPING
THAT MAYBE YOU'D COME WITH ME TO JUSTIN'S N.A. MEETING.
HE'S GETTING HIS 1-YEAR CHIP TODAY.
IT'S BEEN A YEAR?
YEAH, AND, YOU KNOW, HE DOESN'T WANT
TO MAKE A BIG DEAL OUT OF IT, BUT I DO.
AND SEEING AS HE CREDITS YOU AND TOMMY
FOR GETTING HIM THROUGH THE DETOX,
I WAS THINKING IT WOULD BE NICE IF,
WELL, FOR JUSTIN, IF--IF YOU WOULD BE THERE TO SUPPORT HIM,
MAYBE SET ASIDE YOUR OWN ISSUES TO CELEBRATE AND, UH--
I'M SORRY. WHY THE HARD SELL? WHAT'S...
OH, YOU'RE INVITING TOMMY.
COME ON. JUSTIN MISSES HANGING OUT WITH YOU TWO TOGETHER.
I MEAN, IT WOULD BE AN AMAZING GIFT IF YOU GUYS BOTH WENT.
CAN'T WE JUST BUY HIM A WATCH?
KEVIN.
LOOK, I'M REALLY SORRY.
THERE'S JUST A LOT OF MURKY, POLLUTED WATER
UNDER THE FRATERNAL BRIDGE RIGHT NOW.
LISTEN, I KNOW IT'S A LOT TO ASK,
BUT IF YOU COULD JUST SET ASIDE YOUR DIFFERENCES FOR ONE HOUR.
ONE HOUR--THAT'S IT.
(sighs)
COME ON. I KNOW YOU'RE A BIGGER MAN THAN THIS.
I'M ACTUALLY NOT. I'M VERY SMALL AND PETTY.
OKAY, I'LL BE THERE WITH THE MAN WHO FIRED ME,
BETRAYED ME, KICKED ME OUT OF THE FAMILY BUSINESS.
I'LL DO THAT FOR JUSTIN.
THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU.
IF KEVIN BEHAVES, I'LL BEHAVE.
ALL RIGHT. I'LL SEE YOU THEN.
OKAY. GOOD-BYE, REBECCA.
(knocks) HEY.
HEY.
HOW DO I LOOK?
FINE. GREAT.
YOU SAID "FINE."
I KNOW BETTER THAN TO HAVE THIS CONVERSATION WITH YOU.
WHY DO YOU CARE WHAT I THINK ANYWAY?
I'VE GOT THIS BIG JOB INTERVIEW.
I WANT TO LOOK YOUNG AND HIP.
YOU KNOW, CASUAL WITHOUT BEING APATHETIC,
PROFESSIONAL, NOT CORPORATE.
THIS SOUNDS LIKE A DATE.
I'D BE MUCH LESS NERVOUS IF IT WAS A DATE.
IT'S A JOB. IT'S SUCH A GREAT JOB.
IT'S C.F.O. OF A SMALL INTERNET COMPANY.
THEY SPECIALIZE IN ORGANIC AND LOCAL PRODUCE.
IT'S A START-UP, FLEXIBLE HOURS
AND THEY'RE COMFORTABLE WITH A TELECOMMUTE,
SO I CAN WORK FROM HOME.
IT'S SO PERFECT THAT... I'M NOT GONNA GET IT.
WHOA. A START-UP IS YOUR PERFECT JOB?
WELL, IT'S NOT REALLY A START-UP.
YOU KNOW, FROM WHAT I GATHER, IT'S MORE OF AN ALREADY-STARTED.
GOOD SALARY COMMENSURATE WITH EXPERIENCE.
STOCK OPTIONS, WHICH IS GREAT,
'CAUSE APPARENTLY IN THIS JOB MARKET,
I'M ONLY WORTH HALF AS MUCH AS I USED TO BE.
I MEAN, YOU, FOOD-- IT'S A SLAM DUNK.
RIGHT. BUT THE INTERNET THING...
THESE GUYS ARE APPARENTLY, LIKE, WUNDERKINDS.
I'M AFRAID THEY'RE GONNA TAKE ONE LOOK AT ME
AND SEE A PERSON WHO'S OLD ENOUGH TO BE THEIR--
MOTHER.
I WAS GONNA SAY BIG SISTER.
WOW, I FELL INTO THAT ONE.
SARAH, IT'S YOUR FIRST JOB INTERVIEW SINCE SCHOOL,
AND YOU'RE NERVOUS. IT'S FINE.
YEAH, WELL, I SHOULD BE.
I'M A MOTHER OF TWO WITH A MORTGAGE
AND ALIMONY PAYMENTS.
I'VE GOTTA NAIL THIS INTERVIEW, TOMMY.
SARAH, YOU WILL. RELAX. THEY'D BE FOOLISH NOT TO HIRE YOU.
YOU THINK?
YEAH, SURE. YOU, UH, SCREWED YOUR COWORKER,
UH, YOU ALMOST TANKED DAD'S COMPANY,
AND YOU QUIT WITHOUT ANY NOTICE.
(woman) THE CURRENT WEATHER CONDITION IN BAKERSFIELD...
HI, HONEY. I GUESS YOU'RE REALLY TIED UP IN MEETINGS.
BUT, UM, MOM AND I ARE ON OUR WAY TO BAKERSFIELD.
YEAH, IT'S A LONG STORY.
...AND SENATOR ROBERT McCALLISTER...
OH, HEY, THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT ROBERT ON THE RADIO.
OH. OH, THAT'S FUNNY. THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT YOU ON THE RADIO.
...McCALLISTER OF CALIFORNIA IS EXPECTED TO SPEND FIVE DAYS
TOURING THE MIDDLE EAST...
WHAT?
MIDDLE EAST?
WAIT A MINUTE.
...IRAQ AND TURKEY. IN A PRESS CONFERENCE...
OH, NO. NO, NO, NO.
ROBERT, ROBERT, ARE-- ARE YOU--ARE YOU CRAZY?
NOW WHY ON EARTH WOULD YOU GO
TO THE MOST DANGEROUS PLACE ON THIS PLANET AND NOT TELL ME?
AND WHY DID I HAVE TO HEAR ABOUT IT ON THE RADIO?
AND--AND CALL ME.
HE LIED TO YOU ABOUT WHERE HE'S GOING.
(sighs)
WELL, THAT'S THE HOUSE.
MM. WELL, IT--IT'S PRETTY.
I MEAN, NOTHING TO SIGNAL CRAZY SERIAL KILLER INSIDE.
LET'S JUST GET THIS OVER WITH.
(whispers) FINE.
(normal voice) YOU OKAY?
I'M SHAKING.
I FEEL SICK TO MY STOMACH. I THINK I'M GONNA CRY.
YOU RING THE BELL.
OKAY.
(rings doorbell)
(children laughing)
(cell phone ringing)
OH, WAIT.
WHAT?
OH, IT'S--IT'S...
OH, OKAY, IT'S ROBERT. IT'S ROBERT.
KITTY.
NO, NO, JUST GIVE ME ONE SECOND. I'M SORRY.
JUST--JUST ONE SECOND. HELLO.
Hi, Kitty. It's me.
Where are you?
WE'RE REFUELING IN CYPRESS. I'M SORRY.
I-I WANTED TO LET YOU KNOW BEFORE THE PRESS BROKE IT,
BUT THE STATE DEPARTMENT INSISTED WE KEEP IT CLASSIFIED
UNTIL WE WERE ON THE GROUND.
Okay, but I seriously doubt the State Department...
(rings doorbell)
THOUGHT THAT I WOULD NOTIFY HAMAS.
Look, you need to see this for what it is--
AN OPPORTUNITY TO INFLUENCE POLICY ON A WORLD STAGE.
ROBERT THIS ABOUT YOU RUNNING AGAIN IN 2012.
I DON'T WANT TO HAVE THIS ARGUMENT NOW.
I'M NOT ARGUING.
I'm just stating a fact.
(man) EXCUSE ME, SENATOR.
OKAY, LOOK, I HAVE TO GO, BUT I LOVE YOU.
ALL RIGHT. I LOVE YOU, TOO.
(beep)
NOT HOME.
OH. OH, SO--SO WHAT NOW?
WE WAIT.
RIGHT OVER HERE.
HI. I'M SARAH WALKER.
I HOPE I'M NOT LATE.
NO, NO, NOT AT ALL.
WE'RE EARLY. HI, KYLE DeWITT.
KYLE, HI.
THIS IS MY PARTNER.
ETHAN, RIGHT?
YEP. HEY, HOW ARE YOU?
NICE TO MEET YOU.
SO I'M SO SORRY THAT WE'RE DOING THIS HERE.
IT'S JUST THAT OUR OFFICES ARE--ARE BEING RENOVATED.
THERE'S NO NEED TO APOLOGIZE.
THIS--THIS IS GREAT.
SO WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT, UH, GREENATOPIA?
NOT VERY MUCH.
JUST WHAT THE RECRUITER TOLD ME.
SO PLEASE TELL ME MORE.
OKAY, GOOD. WE'LL START AT THE BEGINNING THEN.
THIS COMPANY WAS BORN UNDER ONE BASIC ASSUMPTION--
PEOPLE WANT TO DO MORE TO HELP THE ENVIRONMENT,
THEY JUST DON'T HAVE ACCESS TO ENOUGH INFORMATION.
THEY'RE CONFUSED.
AND WHO CAN BLAME 'EM? YOU KNOW, ANY GLOBALLY CONSCIOUS CONSUMER
IS IMMEDIATELY CONFRONTED WITH ALL THESE DECISIONS
THE SECOND THEY WALK INTO A SUPERMARKET.
DO THEY BUY ORGANIC PRODUCE FROM OVERSEAS, OR DO THEY BUY
CONVENTIONAL THAT'S LOCALLY GROWN?
YOU KNOW, DO YOU CONTRIBUTE TO GROUNDWATER POLLUTION,
INGEST PESTICIDES INTO YOUR SYSTEM, OR DO YOU
EXPAND YOUR CARBON FOOTPRINT AND INCREASE GLOBAL WARMING?
BECAUSE OF THE DIESEL THAT IT TAKES TO GET
YOUR AUSTRALIAN ORGANIC MANGO TO YOUR PLATE.
YOU'RE RIGHT. SAVE YOUR BODY, OR SAVE THE PLANET--
THAT'S A TOUGH CONSUMER CHOICE.
EXACTLY.
SO A COUPLE OF YEARS AGO, I'M OUT SURFING.
ODDLY ENOUGH, I GET MY BEST IDEAS WHEN I'M OUT IN THE OCEAN.
RIGHT.
AND, UH, IT'S IN BETWEEN SETS, I'M WAITING ON THIS WAVE,
AND THIS IDEA COMES TO ME-- WHAT IF THERE WAS A WEB SITE
WHERE PEOPLE COULD LOG ON AND FIND OUT WHAT KIND OF IMPACT
THE FOOD THEY BUY HAS ON THE ENVIRONMENT?
AND THAT'S THE ORIGIN OF GREENATOPIA.
JUST LOG ON, ENTER YOUR ZIP CODE AND BOOM--
OUR ROBUST AND EFFICIENT DATABASE RETRIEVAL ENGINE
GIVES YOU ALL THE PERTINENT INFORMATION YOU NEED.
IT'S, UH, WELL, IT'S GENIUS.
IT IS THE INTERNET AT ITS BEST, YOU KNOW?
IT'S--IT'S THE DEMOCRATIZATION OF INFORMATION.
RIGHT. UH-HUH.
AND WHILE WE HELP MOM-AND-POP AMERICA
MAKE NUTRITIOUS, PLANET-FRIENDLY CHOICES,
WE RAKE IN SERIOUS COIN.
(laughs)
WELL, OKAY, WHAT MY PARTNER MEANS TO SAY,
UH, IS THAT WE HAVE IDENTIFIED A MARKET
AND CREATED A MEANS TO TARGET THAT MARKET.
WITH REVENUE STREAMS FROM BOTH CONSUMERS AND VENDORS.
YOU DO HAVE THE CHANCE TO MAKE SOME SERIOUS COIN.
(laughs)
VENDORS ARE LINING UP RIGHT NOW,
AND THE WEB SITE'S IN BETA TESTING.
WE'RE READY TO LAUNCH THE PILOT PROGRAM.
THAT SOUNDS GREAT.
CAN I START YOU THREE WITH A DRINK?
UH, SPARKING WATER FOR ME, PLEASE.
BEER.
YEAH, I'LL HAVE A BEER.
(man) EXCELLENT. GOT IT.
OH, UH, MAKE THAT THREE BEERS.
SURE.
WELCOME, EVERYBODY,
TO THE, UH, T.G.I.F. AFTERNOON MEETING.
I'M PAULA, AND I'M AN ADDICT.
(all) HI, PAULA.
HEY, EVERYBODY. I'M GLAD YOU GUYS ARE HERE.
GOOD. I THOUGHT WAS LATE.
YOU ARE.
I HEARD ABOUT THE NEW JOB. THAT'S AWESOME. CONGRATS.
THANKS.
(keys jangle)
LOOK, CAN WE JUST BURY THE HATCHET NOW, PLEASE?
I THINK YOU'RE THE ONE THAT DID THE HATCHET JOB.
MAYBE ME FIRING YOU
WASN'T THE WORST THING THAT EVER HAPPENED.
I MEAN, IF YOU--IF YOU THINK ABOUT IT, YOU HAVE A NEW CAREER.
I'M SORRY. YOU WANT ME TO THANK YOU FOR FIRING ME?
YOU HAVE A PERSONALITY DISORDER. YOU KNOW THAT?
OH, STOP BEING SUCH A DRAMA QUEEN.
CAN YOU GET OUT OF THE WAY
SO I CAN BE WITH THE BROTHER I ACTUALLY LIKE?
I'M NOT IN YOUR WAY. GO.
JUST MOVE.
AFTER YOU.
DON'T BE A ***. JUST MOVE.
HEY, DON'T TOUCH ME.
DON'T DO THAT.
(grunting)
NOW HAVE YOU GUYS THOUGHT ABOUT FRANCHISING THIS?
BECAUSE THERE IS NO REASON THAT THIS SHOULDN'T GO GLOBAL.
MM. YOUR MOUTH, GOD'S EARS.
(chuckles) I MEAN, REALLY.
AND YOU COULD BE IN ON THE GROUND FLOOR ON THIS.
WELL, THAT WOULD BE EXCITING.
IT'S REALLY EXCITING.
ONE LAST QUESTION.
UH, IF YOU COULD HAVE DINNER WITH ANY PRESIDENT...
UH-HUH.
ALIVE OR DEAD, WHO WOULD IT BE?
F.D.R.
HMM. INTERESTING.
SARAH, LISTEN, YOUR EXPERIENCE,
YOUR EDUCATION, YOUR PERSONALITY,
IT'S ALL-- IT'S ALL VERY IMPRESSIVE.
THANK YOU.
AND CAN I JUST SAY RIGHT HERE,
THAT I WOULD VERY MUCH LIKE TO BE PART OF YOUR ORGANIZATION.
I THINK WE'D LOVE THAT, TOO.
BUT WE HAVE OTHER CANDIDATES TO MEET
BEFORE WE MAKE A DECISION.
OH. UH, OH, RIGHT, OF COURSE.
YEAH.
WELL, THANK YOU SO MUCH.
BUT D-DO LET US KNOW IF YOU, UH, IF YOU GET ANY OTHER OFFERS.
I WILL.
THANK YOU FOR COMING TO LUNCH.
GREAT TO MEET YOU GUYS. OKAY.
THANKS SO MUCH. THANK YOU.
YOU KNOW THE THING THAT BUGS ME THE MOST
IS THAT HE COULDN'T TAKE TWO SECONDS TO CALL ME
AND TELL ME THAT HE WAS HALFWAY AROUND THE WORLD.
MM. YEAH. THAT DOES SOUND FISHY.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
WELL, I DON'T KNOW.
MAYBE HE'S HIDING SOMETHING ELSE.
N-N--THIS IS ABOUT NATIONAL SECURITY,
NOT--NOT ***.
FOR SOME MEN, IT'S SEX. FOR OTHERS, IT'S POWER.
TWO SIDES OF THE SAME COIN, KITTY.
(sighs) OKAY, MOTHER, WHATEVER YOU'RE TRYING TO SAY,
WHY DON'T YOU JUST COME OUT AND SAY IT?
SWEETHEART, I'VE WATCHED YOU ALL DAY
TYING YOURSELF UP IN KNOTS ABOUT ROBERT--
WHERE IS HE? WHAT IS HE DOING?
OH, THAT IS NOT TRUE.
I-I WORRY ABOUT YOU,
THAT YOU'RE HEADED DOWN THIS DANGEROUS PATH.
HE'S OBVIOUSLY PRIORITIZING CAREER OVER FAMILY.
NOW HE'S LYING TO YOU.
UM, YOU'RE GETTING VERY CLOSE TO CROSSING A LINE HERE.
KITTY, I WATCHED HIM.
I'M AFRAID HE'S TURNING YOU AGAINST YOUR FAMILY.
(exhales) I'M GONNA GO GET SOME AIR.
KITTY.
OH.
LOOK, I'M SORRY. I'M SOR--
PLEASE GET BACK IN THE CAR.
NO, NO, F-FIRST OF ALL,
ROBERT HAS NOT TURNED ME AGAINST THE FAMILY, MOTHER--
YOU WERE CERTAINLY QUICK TO ABANDON ME
ON THE PORCH JUST NOW.
I TOOK A PHONE CALL.
WHAT ABOUT THAT NIGHT AT YOUR HOUSE WHEN ROBERT
VERBALLY ATTACKED ME AND THE REST OF OUR FAMILY?
YOU NEVER CAME TO ANYONE'S DEFENSE.
OH, SO NOW WE GET DOWN TO IT.
THIS IS ALL ABOUT THAT STUPID FIGHT
THAT YOU HAD WITH ROBERT, ISN'T IT?
IT WASN'T A FIGHT. IT WAS A DRESSING DOWN
IN THE MOST ARROGANT, ALOOF SORT OF WAY.
I'M NOT GONNA STAND HERE, MOTHER,
AND LET YOU CRITICIZE MY HUSBAND.
AND BY THE WAY, THAT IS YOUR PERCEPTION.
THAT IS NOT HOW I SEE IT.
KITTY, WITH ROBERT, FAMILY WILL ALWAYS RUN
A VERY DISTANT SECOND PLACE TO HIS AMBITION.
YOU ARE SUCH A PIECE OF WORK, MOTHER.
WHY--WHY ARE YOU SUDDENLY--
I CARE ABOUT YOU. YOU'RE MY DAUGHTER.
I KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE MARRIED TO A POWERFUL MAN.
YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE MARRIED TO ROBERT.
YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT MY RELATIONSHIP.
I AM NOT YOU,
AND ROBERT IS DEFINITELY, DEFINITELY NOT DAD.
(barks)
IT'S OKAY. STOP, STOP.
IT'S OKAY. IT'S OKAY, BOY.
(chuckles) I'M SORRY.
HE'S, UH, HE'S USUALLY VERY FRIENDLY.
YEAH.
I THINK THE SHOUTING SCARED HIM.
OH, RIGHT. IT WAS JUST A LITTLE MISUNDERSTANDING.
OH, I'M--I'M--I'M SORRY. NO, IT--IT WAS MY FAULT.
SHE'S MY MOTHER.
YEAH, WE'RE--WE'RE JUST HERE WAITING FOR THE LAFFERTYS.
OH. I'M, UH, I'M GEORGE LAFFERTY.
OH.
HI.
HI. HI, MR. LAFFERTY.
I'M SORRY. UH, WH-WHO ARE YOU?
SO IS IT JUST YOU IN THE HOUSE?
UM, MY SON RYAN'S BACK IN SCHOOL.
UH, PETER AND RICHARD LIVE IN THE BAY AREA.
SO NOW TELL ME THIS LONG STORY
ABOUT HOW YOU KNEW CONNIE
THAT BROUGHT YOU ALL THE WAY FROM PASADENA.
UH, GEORGE, I HAVE A CONFESSION TO MAKE.
I WASN'T ENTIRELY HONEST BEFORE.
I DIDN'T PERSONALLY KNOW YOUR WIFE,
BUT MY HUSBAND DID.
HE DIED A FEW YEARS AGO.
UH, TWO.
TWO YEARS AGO, AND HE AND... CONNIE
DID SOME WORK TOGETHER.
WILLIAM WALKER...
OJAI FOODS?
OH, I-I WISH I DIDN'T HAVE TO TELL YOU--
I DON'T KNOW HOW TO BEGIN.
MY HUSBAND AND YOUR WIFE, WE THINK, HAD AN AFFAIR.
YOU THINK... (chuckles)
BASED ON WHAT?
WELL, WE'VE PIECED TOGETHER INFORMATION.
MY... MY HUSBAND DID THIS SORT OF THING MORE THAN ONCE.
THAT'S NOT MY PROBLEM. THAT'S YOUR PROBLEM.
LOOK, WE KNOW HOW DIFFICULT THIS IS TO HEAR,
AND--AND-- AND IT'S EVEN MORE--
NO, I'M SORRY.
YOU CANNOT COME INTO MY HOME AND SAY THESE DISGRACEFUL THINGS
ABOUT A WOMAN WHO'S NOT AROUND TO DEFEND HERSELF.
DID YOU EVER EVEN MEET HER?
DO YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT WHAT KIND OF MARRIAGE WE HAD?
LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING.
IT'S BEEN HELL ON MY FAMILY SINCE CONNIE DIED.
IT ALMOST DESTROYED MY CHILDREN, AND NOW WHEN--
WHEN WE'RE JUST FINDING SOME FRAGILE BIT OF NORMALCY,
YOU--YOU COME IN HERE WITH THIS... HORRIBLE STORY.
NOW... IF YOU COULD PLEASE JUST GO.
UH, YES, YES, MOM.
GEORGE, I KNOW YOU'RE UPSET.
IF YOU WOULD PLEASE JUST HEAR ME OUT.
MOM, MOM, COME ON.
GEORGE, PLEASE.
DON'T EVER CONTACT ME OR MY FAMILY AGAIN.
I THOUGHT IT WAS A GOOD INTERVIEW.
WELL, TO BE HONEST, I THOUGHT THEY WOULD
OFFER ME THE JOB RIGHT THEN AND THERE.
OKAY, WELL, LET ME KNOW WHEN THEY DECIDE.
THANKS FOR CALLING.
(beep)
YOU THINK THERE ARE TOO MANY CORMORANTS?
YOU CAN'T HAVE TOO MANY CORMORANTS.
SO DID YOU GET THE JOB?
UH, I'M ON A SHORT LIST.
IS THAT GOOD?
WELL, IT'S BETTER THAN NOT BEING ON A LIST, I GUESS,
BUT THERE'S A LOT OF PEOPLE LOOKING FOR WORK RIGHT NOW.
BUT YOU'RE THE SMARTEST.
YOU ARE THE SWEETEST.
SO WHAT GOES IN NEXT, THESE LITTLE GUYS?
YEAH.
I'M GONNA DO AN EXTRA-CREDIT REPORT ON THEM
SO I CAN BE SURE TO GET AN A-PLUS.
MM.
MAYBE THERE'S EXTRA CREDIT YOU COULD DO,
YOU KNOW, TO GET THE JOB.
THAT IS A GOOD IDEA.
PAIGE, THAT IS A REALLY GOOD IDEA.
OKAY, SO ANYBODY ELSE HAVE ANYTHING TO SHARE TODAY?
NO? ALL RIGHT. THEN WE GOT SOME, UH,
1-YEAR BIRTHDAYS TO CELEBRATE TODAY.
JUSTIN, UP HERE.
THANK YOU.
CONGRATULATIONS.
I'M PROUD OF YOU. LET'S HEAR IT FOR JUSTIN.
(man) WAY TO GO, MAN.
HI, I'M JUSTIN. UH, I'M A DRUG ADDICT AND AN ALCOHOLIC.
(group) HI, JUSTIN.
I JUST WANT TO SAY THAT I'M-- I'M GRATEFUL FOR BEING HERE,
UH, CLEAN AND SOBER,
'CAUSE A YEAR AGO, I DON'T THINK THAT WOULD'VE BEEN THE CASE.
UM, GOD, I MEAN, I--YOU KNOW,
I REMEMBER STEALING MONEY FROM PEOPLE I LOVED.
I RUINED, UH, COUNTLESS FAMILY DINNERS,
UH, BIRTHDAY PARTIES.
I MAY OR MAY NOT HAVE THROWN UP
ON A FEW, UH, FAMILY MEMBERS AT A CERTAIN POINT.
I-I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT THAT, BUT, UH,
I'M JUST REALLY, UH, GRATEFUL, THAT, UH, THEY FORGAVE ME.
I DON'T KNOW WHY THEY DID, BUT THEY DID,
AS... AS WELL AS MY GIRLFRIEND, WHICH MEANS MORE--
(door slams)
(clattering)
SHUT UP.
(murmuring)
UH--
I'M SO SORRY.
SORRY. IG-IGNORE US.
I'M--I'M SO SORRY.
YEAH, UM, SHOULD WE...
(mouths words)
UM, I GUESS THE, UH, THE LESSON I-I LEARNED LAST YEAR
IS TO, UH, ENJOY THE ORDINARY DAY,
UM, BECAUSE THAT'S ALL I HAVE IS TODAY.
SO THANK YOU.
(man) CONGRATULATIONS.
(woman) GOOD JOB.
(applause)
(rock music playing)
(man and woman arguing loudly)
(music continues)
COMING.
GONNA NEED 5 BUCKS FROM YOU IF I'M GONNA TIP THIS GUY.
OTHERWISE, WE'RE SCREWED. SARAH, HEY.
WHAT, UH, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
IS THIS YOUR OFFICE?
UM, SORTA, YEAH, OUR OFFICES.
MAN, BEER IN THE SHOWER IS THE BEST.
IS THE PIZZA--OOH.
SARAH...
OKAY, WHAT IS THIS? IS THIS, LIKE, A SCAM?
NO, IT'S NOT A SCAM. ALL RIGHT?
I KNOW THIS DOESN'T LOOK LIKE MUCH--
WELL, YOU'RE RIGHT ABOUT THAT.
SO THE RENOVATIONS, THAT WAS JUST A LIE?
NO, I CAN EXPLAIN THE RENOVATION.
SALARY COMMENSURATE WITH EXPERIENCE?
OKAY, WE'RE ASSUMING EVENTUALLY, THAT ONCE WE'RE IN
A FINANCIAL SITUATION WHERE THAT'S POSSIBLE--
BENEFITS PACKAGE?
WHEN VENDORS ARE LINED UP, YOU'RE GONNA HAVE BENEFITS.
HOW ABOUT THE BETA TESTING?
THAT'S TRUE.
OH, GOOD. SMALL KERNEL OF TRUTH.
SARAH, WE WERE HONEST WITH YOU.
WHAT?!
WE WERE MOSTLY HONEST WITH YOU.
ARE YOU SERIOUS?
IT'S A NEW COMPANY, ALL RIGHT?
I SAID THAT IT WAS A NEW COMPANY. IT'S A START-UP.
THE HEADHUNTER, THE--THE LUNCH AT ETAGE--
YOU'VE DONE NOTHING BUT LIE...
NO, SARAH--
SINCE I FIRST HEARD THE WORD GREENATOPIA.
GOD, I AM SUCH A FOOL. I SPENT THE AFTERNOON
WORKING UP THIS PROPOSAL TO IMPRESS YOU GUYS.
HERE. CHOKE ON IT.
(sighs)
SHE IS MAD.
(Kitty) OH, GOD. I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHERE WE ARE.
I-I MUST HAVE TAKEN A WRONG TURN OR SOMETHING.
I...
MOM, Y--
YOU TRIED TO DO THE RIGHT THING.
IT WAS IMPOSSIBLE.
AND--AND TELLING HIM ABOUT RYAN
WOULD'VE MADE IT SO MUCH WORSE.
YOU GOTTA STOP BEATING YOURSELF UP.
PULL OVER.
WHAT? NOW?
PULL OVER. STOP THE CAR.
OKAY, ARE--ARE YOU SICK?
PULL OVER NOW.
WHAT'S WRONG? WAIT, WAIT, MOM!
MOM, ARE YOU OKAY?
MOTHER, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
I HATE YOU, WILLIAM WALKER!
YOU'RE A SELFISH SON OF A ***!
OH, MOM, MOM, STOP.
DON'T STOP ME.
YOU NEVER LOVED ANYONE BUT YOURSELF
AND YOUR STUPID ***!
WHEW. WHOA.
THAT ONE REALLY TOOK IT OUT OF ME.
YEAH, YEAH. THAT--THAT-- THAT--THAT WAS A-A GOOD ONE.
SO DO YOU FEEL A-A LITTLE BIT BETTER?
OH, GEORGE WAS RIGHT.
MM.
I BARELY UNDERSTOOD MY OWN MARRIAGE.
HOW COULD I POSSIBLY UNDERSTAND ANYONE ELSE'S?
KITTY, I'M SO SORRY.
I SHOULD NEVER HAVE SAID THOSE THINGS
ABOUT YOU AND ROBERT.
AH, YOU WEREN'T THAT FAR FROM THE TRUTH.
WELL, THE TRUTH IS OVERRATED.
THE TRUTH JUST BROKE GEORGE LAFFERTY'S HEART.
THE TRUTH BROKE MY HEART. I'M SWEARING OFF OF IT.
OH, COME ON, MOM.
YOU DIDN'T TELL ME ANYTHING THAT I DON'T ALREADY KNOW.
I MEAN... (laughs) ROBERT'S AMBITION?
I MEAN, THAT'S BEEN A THING BETWEEN US SINCE THE ELECTION,
AND--AND I KNOW THAT HE WANTS TO RUN FOR PRESIDENT AGAIN,
AND HE KNOWS THAT I DON'T WANT TO SLOG THROUGH
ANOTHER NATIONAL CAMPAIGN,
I MEAN, ESPECIALLY IF... IF WE EVER HAVE KIDS AND...
YOU KNOW, THE TRUTH THAT BREAKS MY HEART
IS I'M AFRAID IF HE EVER HAD TO CHOOSE, HE...
HE WOULDN'T CHOOSE ME.
OH, KITTY.
REGARDLESS OF ANYTHING I SAID, ROBERT LOVES YOU.
I NEVER DOUBTED THAT.
I KNOW, AND THE TRUTH IS,
IS THAT WE'RE... WE'RE DOING OKAY RIGHT NOW,
AND... YOU KNOW,
IF HE WANTS TO RUN FOR PRESIDENT IN FOUR YEARS,
WE'LL JUST DEAL WITH IT THEN, RIGHT?
PERHAPS YOU'D LIKE TO GET SOME OF THAT OUT OF YOUR SYSTEM?
I HIGHLY RECOMMEND IT.
(laughs) NO.
I THINK IT WOULD BE MUCH MORE PRODUCTIVE
FOR ME TO CHECK MY VOICE MAIL
AND SEE WHAT HE HAS TO SAY FOR HIMSELF.
WHEW.
OH.
WHAT?
OH, MY GOD. MOM.
MOM, NO, JUST LISTEN--
WHAT? WHAT? WHAT IS IT?
LISTEN, LISTEN.
(woman) She's six months pregnant,
she lives in Missouri,
and she wants to meet you and Robert as soon as possible.
Call me back, and I'll give you all the information.
Congratulations.
MOM... MOM, I GOT PICKED.
OH, KITTY. YES.
WE GOT PICKED!
YOU GOT PICKED. OH, HONEY!
MOTHER, THERE'S A--
THERE'S A WOMAN IN MISSOURI WHO WANTS TO GIVE ME HER BABY!
OH, KITTY, CONGRATULATIONS. (laughs)
OH, I'M DYING OF CURIOSITY.
I WISH WE HAD
THAT SOCIAL WORKER'S HOME PHONE NUMBER.
HAVE YOU GOT HER ADDRESS?
WE COULD GO OVER THERE AND *** ON HER DOOR.
HA.
HA HA.
(door opens and closes)
HEY. CONGRATULATIONS, KITTY.
OH, MOTHER.
EVERY WANTS TO CELEBRATE WITH YOU. LOOK.
I'M SO HAPPY FOR YOU.
THANK YOU.
SHE MADE YOU A CAKE WITH A LITTLE CANDLE ON IT.
THANK YOU. OH, REBECCA. REBECCA, THAT IS SO SWEET.
OH, NO. ACTUALLY, THIS IS FOR JUSTIN.
IT WAS HIS 1-YEAR BIRTHDAY OF SOBRIETY, SO...
OH.
OH, THAT'S NOT UNTIL NEXT WEEK.
WELL, THEY GAVE HIM HIS 1-YEAR CHIP
AT HIS N.A. MEETING TODAY.
WELL, HE SHOULD'VE TOLD US ABOUT THAT.
(Kitty) REALLY?
WELL, YOU KNOW JUSTIN.
HE DIDN'T WANT TO MAKE A BIG DEAL OUT OF IT.
WELL, THAT'S TOUGH.
WE'RE GONNA MAKE A BIG DEAL OUT OF IT TONIGHT.
PIZZA.
(Saul) OKAY.
(Kitty and Nora) YAY!
WOW. YOU GUYS MUST REALLY BE HUNGRY.
OH, HONEY.
I'M SO PROUD OF YOU.
FOR WH--OH.
CONGRATULATIONS, SWEETHEART.
OH, THANK YOU, UNCLE SAUL, YOU KNOW,
BUT IT'S JUST--IT'S JUST-- IT'S NOT A SURE THING YET.
WELL, NOTHING IN LIFE IS A SURE THING.
YOU SHOULD CELEBRATE THIS, KIDDO.
YEAH.
HEY, MOM.
DON'T YOU "HEY, MOM" ME. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO YOU?
I WAS REFERRING TO KITTY. HEY, MOM.
WELL, WHAT THE HELL DID HAPPEN TO YOU?
NOTHING. I GOT--
HE AND TOMMY GOT INTO A LITTLE TUSSLE.
YEAH, A LITTLE BIT.
WHAT? YOU HAD A FISTFIGHT?
NO, IT WASN'T A FISTFIGHT
'CAUSE NONE OF US LANDED A DECENT PUNCH.
ALTHOUGH I DID SLAP HIM PRETTY HARD AT ONE POINT.
LET ME SEE YOUR HAND. (gasps)
YOU HURT YOUR-- WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH YOU?
YOU ACT LIKE 10 YEAR OLDS.
YEAH, WHERE IS THE OTHER 10 YEAR OLD?
I JUST SAW HIM OUT BACK. HE'S ON HIS WAY IN.
TOMMY WALKER!
YEAH.
OH. OH, GOOD SWEET GOD IN HEAVEN.
WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH YOU TWO?
THIS IS JUST A-A SCRATCH. IT'S FINE, OKAY?
LOOK, TONIGHT IS ABOUT JUS AND KITTY.
HI, TOMMY.
LOOK AT YOU. OH.
MWAH.
THANK YOU.
ALL RIGHT, GUYS. COME ON THIS WAY.
I JUST WANT TO SHOW YOU SOMETHING REAL QUICK.
AFTER YOU.
UH...
COME ON IN.
(clicks lock)
DON'T. COME ON!
OH, COME ON!
STOP, STOP. WHAT GOES AROUND COMES AROUND, OKAY?
IT'S TIME FOR AN INTERVENTION. RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW,
YOU TWO, *** ANONYMOUS. ALL RIGHT? I'LL START.
HI, MY NAME IS KEVIN. I'M A ***,
AND I'M POWERLESS OVER MY ANGER.
STOP BEING AN IDIOT, JUSTIN.
NO, STOP. SERIOUSLY, BOTH OF YOU STOP.
THIS FEUD HAS BEEN GOING ON WAY TOO LONG.
NEVER MIND HOW MUCH YOU'RE HURTING EACH OTHER,
NOW YOU'RE STARTING TO HURT OTHER PEOPLE.
YOU RUINED REBECCA'S SURPRISE, YOU GOT MOM BESIDE HERSELF.
MOM'S ALWAYS BESIDE HERSELF.
YOU KNOW WHAT? DO THIS FOR ME.
YOU GUYS HAVE FORGIVEN ME FOR SO MANY THINGS.
I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY YOU JUST CAN'T FORGIVE EACH OTHER.
IT'S NOT THAT EASY.
IT IS THAT EASY.
BABY STEPS. WE HAVE A SAYING IN NARCOTICS ANONYMOUS, RIGHT--
FAKE IT TILL YOU MAKE IT.
OH, PLEASE.
I KNOW IT SOUNDS CORNY, BUT IT WORKS.
I'M JUST ASKING YOU GUYS
TO--TO PRETEND THAT YOU DON'T HATE EACH OTHER,
AND THEN EVENTUALLY, YOU MAY END UP NOT HATING EACH OTHER.
I DOUBT THAT.
YOU OWE ME FOR RUINING MY MEETING TODAY.
OKAY, FINE. I'LL FAKE IT. WHATEVER.
TOMMY?
(chuckles)
THIS IS ME FAKING IT. (chuckles)
SEE? WAS THAT SO HARD?
WE MADE BIG STEPS TODAY. NOW LET'S GET BACK OUT THERE.
I'M SORRY ROBERT COULDN'T BE HERE TO CELEBRATE WITH US.
OH, REALLY? YOU MEAN MR. ARROGANT?
SENATOR ARROGANT, IF YOU PLEASE, AND YES,
BECAUSE HE MAKES YOU HAPPY.
AND THAT'S REALLY THE IMPORTANT THING.
OH.
HERE. YOU CAN TAKE THIS HOME NOW.
THE JINX IS OFF.
YEAH.
YEAH, BUT WHAT IF THE... BIRTH MOTHER
DECIDES SHE DOESN'T LIKE US
OR--OR WHAT IF SHE CHANGES HER MIND?
I MEAN, THERE--THERE ARE
A MILLION THINGS THAT CAN GO WRONG.
MAYBE WHEN I TALK TO ROBERT AND I HEAR HIS VOICE
AND HE'S HAPPY ABOUT IT, I DON'T KNOW,
MAYBE IT'LL MAKE IT FEEL MORE... REAL OR...
I-I DON'T KNOW.
YOU CAN'T PUT YOUR HAPPINESS ON HOLD.
YOU CAN CELEBRATE WITH ROBERT WHEN HE GETS HOME,
BUT YOU SHOULD BE HAPPY NOW, TODAY, RIGHT THIS SECOND.
OKAY.
OKAY WHAT?
OKAY. OKAY. (laughs)
OKAY. OKAY! I'M HAPPY!
(laughs)
(sighs) YEAH.
(laughs)
♪♪
(whispers) GOOD MORNING.
♪♪
HEY.
IS THAT MY ROBE?
I STOLE IT LAST NIGHT.
YOU STOLE MY ROBE?
YEAH, SO YOU DON'T HAVE TO GO COMMANDO.
(chuckles)
LISTEN, I JUST WANT TO SAY, I'M SORRY AGAIN
FOR OVERSTEPPING WITH KEVIN AND--
DON'T APOLOGIZE.
SERIOUSLY, YOU SAID YOU'RE SORRY ABOUT 17 TIMES.
YOU DON'T HAVE TO.
NO, I KNOW, I JUST--
I WANT YOU TO KNOW HOW MUCH IT MEANT TO ME
THAT YOU LET ME INTO THAT HARD PART OF YOUR LIFE.
I KNOW IT'S NOT EASY FOR YOU.
MM. I'M GETTING BETTER.
YEAH, AND I WANT TO RECIPROCATE,
SO... VOILà.
WHAT IS THIS?
A KEY TO MY PLACE.
I WANT YOU TO BE HERE WHENEVER YOU WANT TO BE HERE.
REALLY?
YEAH.
I LIKE THAT.
YEAH?
♪♪
(doorbell rings)
IF YOU'RE A MONSTER, I'M GOING TO RUIN YOU!
(sighs)
WHAT'S UP, BUDDY?
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
I-I DIDN'T KNOW YOU WERE A MOM.
YEAH.
UH, COOP, WOULD YOU GO PUT YOUR LUNCH IN YOUR BOX?
YEAH, I HAVE TWO KIDS, AN EX-HUSBAND,
SIBLINGS WHO DON'T HAVE ANY BOUNDARIES
AND A MOTHER WHO TREATS ME LIKE I'M 16.
THAT'S COOL.
THIS IS A LITTLE WEIRD. WHAT DO YOU WANT?
LISTEN, WHAT WE DID WAS--
THOUGHTLESS. IT WAS DESPICABLE AND MORALLY REPREHENSIBLE.
YES, ALL THOSE THINGS, ALL RIGHT?
BUT OUR BUSINESS PLAN AND OUR CONCEPT IS GOOD.
IT'S REALLY GOOD, AND I COULD TELL THAT YOU'RE INTO IT.
MM-HMM. SO?
SO WE PUT EVERYTHING WE HAVE INTO THIS COMPANY,
AND WE HAVE TO MAKE IT WORK, ALL RIGHT?
ETHAN LEFT THIS KICK-*** JOB IN SILICON VALLEY,
WE BORROWED EVERY CENT WE COULD FROM FAMILY AND FRIENDS,
AND THE REASON THAT WE DON'T HAVE ANY OFFICES
IS 'CAUSE WE PUT EVERY SINGLE PENNY INTO THIS WEB SITE.
ALL RIGHT, I'M SORRY THAT WE LIED TO YOU.
WE WERE SCARED THAT IF WE TOLD YOU THE TRUTH,
YOU WOULDN'T TAKE US SERIOUSLY, AND I'M SORRY FOR THAT,
ALL RIGHT, 'CAUSE THAT'S MY BAD.
YES, IT IS.
BUT I HAD TO COME OVER HERE BECAUSE YOU'RE PERFECT.
CAN I COME IN FOR FIVE MINUTES?
I'LL GIVE YOU TWO.
DONE.
(sighs)
NOT ONLY ARE YOU AWESOME, BUT YOU'RE EXPERIENCED,
AND, SARAH, YOU'RE SO SMART, ALL RIGHT?
WE READ OVER YOUR PROPOSAL.
ADDING A SOCIAL NETWORKING COMPONENT TO THIS WEB SITE?
COME ON. THAT'S BRILLIANT.
LISTEN, YOUR BUSINESS HAS A LOT OF POTENTIAL.
BUT I CAN'T TAKE THAT KIND OF RISK.
NO, IT'S NOT A RISK IF YOU COME ON BOARD.
THAT'S MY POINT, ALL RIGHT? WE NEED YOU.
YOU CAN MAKE THIS HAPPEN. I KNOW THAT.
I KNOW THAT IN MY GUT.
I CAN'T.
OKAY, I'M NOT ABOVE BEGGING.
OH, NO, NO, DON'T DO THAT.
(sighs) LISTEN, I NEED A PAYCHECK
AT THE END OF A MONTH.
I'LL SELL MY TRUCK IF I HAVE TO.
YOU SERIOUS?
YEAH.
MY TERMS?
ANYTHING YOU WANT.
MY SCHEDULE?
ANYTIME YOU WANT.
WE WORK FROM MY HOUSE?
DID YOU SEE OUR PLACE?
NO MORE LYING.
NEVER AGAIN.
OKAY.
"OKAY" AS IN YOU'RE GONNA TAKE THE JOB?
OKAY, I'M TAKING THE JOB, BUT RIGHT NOW I'VE GOT CARPOOL.
I'VE GOTTA TAKE MY KIDS TO SCHOOL.
SO WHY DON'T YOU GO GET ETHAN? GET UP SOME COFFEE.
WE START IN 45 MINUTES.
AWESOME.
HMM.
(cell phone rings)
HELLO.
KITTY.
WELL, HEY.
I'M SORRY IT'S TAKEN ME SO LONG TO GET BACK TO YOU.
THIS IS THE FIRST SECOND I'VE HAD TO TALK.
That's okay. You were talking to the Knesset.
I MEAN, HOW--HOW DO YOU GET AWAY FROM THAT, RIGHT?
SO HOW ARE YOU?
HOW WAS YOUR TRIP TO, UM, BAKERSFIELD?
It's a long story, but, Robert, listen,
UM, THE SOCIAL WORKER CALLED, AND, UH... WE GOT PICKED.
W-WE GOT PICKED?
(laughs) YES.
Yes, we did.
(laughs)
OKAY, LET'S SEE, THE--THE BIRTH MOM IS FROM MISSOURI.
I LOVE MISSOURI.
AND SHE'S, UH, SIX MONTHS, SHE'S HEALTHY.
SIX MONTHS? YOU MEAN WE'LL HAVE A BABY IN--
In three months.
YES, WE'RE GONNA HAVE A BABY IN THREE MONTHS.
Can you believe it? (laughs)
(laughs) NO. NO, I-I... I CAN'T.
Can you?
NO.
OH, KITTY, THIS IS AMAZING.
I KNOW. I KNOW, I KNOW.
IT IS, IT IS.
AND I'M... I'M REALLY HAPPY.
(doorbell rings)
COMING, COMING, COMING.
GEORGE.
I WAS UP ALL NIGHT...
THINKING ABOUT WHY YOU'D DRIVE ALL THAT WAY
TO TELL ME ABOUT AN AFFAIR
THAT MY DEAD WIFE SUPPOSEDLY HAD
WITH YOUR DEAD HUSBAND.
YOU DON'T SEEM LIKE A ***.
I JUST...
I KEEP WONDERING, IS THERE MORE TO IT?
IS THERE?
WHEN DID THIS, UM, AFFAIR TAKE PLACE?
ABOUT 22 YEARS AGO.
WHAT YOU CAME TO TELL ME ABOUT,
IT'S ABOUT MY SON, ISN'T IT?
IT'S ABOUT RYAN.
GEORGE, PLEASE, WON'T YOU COME IN?