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[DOORBELL RINGS]
IGNORE IT.
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE.
LET ME IN.
IT'S STEPHANIE.
DEFINITELY IGNORE IT.
Stephanie: I'M IN TROUBLE.
I'M IN DANGER. LET ME IN!
HOW MUCH DANGER?
[KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK]
OU SHOULD OPEN IT.
YOU KNOW IT'S GOING TO BE
HYSTERICAL STEPHANIE PROBLEMS.
WHAT?!
I'M BEING CHASED BY A WARRIOR PRINCESS.
A WHAT?
LUCY LAWLESS SAW ME IN A RESTAURANT,
AND SHE'S AFTER ME. SHE FOLLOWED ME.
LUCY LAWLESS?
SHE'S THE ACTRESS
THAT PLAYS XENA, WARRIOR PRINCESS.
ACTRESS. HA!
THEY HAVE A BIG RIVALRY GOING.
WHY IS SHE AFTER YOU?
I WAS ON ROSIE O'DONNELL,
AND I SAID
THENA, WARRIOR GODDESS,
EVER GOT INTO A FIGHT WITH HER CHARACTER,
XENA, WARRIOR PRINCESS,
THAT THENA COULD KICK XENA'S ***.
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
OH, MY GOD! PLEASE, FOR THE LOVE OF OUR CHILD,
DON'T TELL HER THAT I'M HERE.
HI. MY NAME'S LUCY LAWLESS.
I'M LOOKING FOR A FRIEND.
SHE'S IN THERE.
YOU REALLY SEEMED TO HAVE SCARED HER.
PEOPLE GET SO CONFUSED BETWEEN LUCY LAWLESS THE ACTRESS
AND XENA THE CHARACTER.
I'M PERFECTLY HARMLESS.
STEPHANIE?
[STEPHANIE WHIMPERING]
STEPHANIE?
E OUT.
I JUST WANT TO TALK TO YOU.
STEPHANIE.
OH! HAH!
LUCY LAWLESS! I'M A BIG FAN.
YOU'RE MY INSPIRATION.
OH, I MUST BE BECAUSE YOUR SHOW
IS A DIRECT RIPOFF OF MINE.
YES. IMITATION IS THE SINCEREST FORM--
STEPHANIE...
WHY DID YOU CHALLENGE ME ON NETWORK TELEVISION?
CHALLENGE, HOMAGE. HOMAGE, CHALLENGE.
BLURRY, BLURRY LINE.
YEAH. WELL, LET'S GET ONE THING STRAIGHT.
IF YOU EVER CROSS ME AGAIN, I WILL FLOG YOU FIRST.
THEN I WILL HAVE YOU DRAWN AND QUARTERED.
I'LL ROLL YOU IN SALT, AND I'LL FEED YOU TO MY HORSE.
YOU GOT THAT?
[QUIVERING] YEAH.
SORRY TO TROUBLE YOU.
NIGHT.
OH! OH!
WHAT A RELIEF.
I WAS SO AFRAID SHE WAS GOING TO SUE ME.
♪ AFTER THE EXES ♪
♪
♪ CAN WE EVER MAKE ANOTHER ONE FLY? ♪
♪ LOOKING FOR SOMETHING SO RIGHT ♪
♪ GOTTA HAVE SOMETHING SO RIGHT ♪
♪ I FOUND ME, THEN I FOUND YOU ♪
♪ FOUND OURSELVES A WHOLE NEW CREW ♪
♪ WE FOUND SOMETHING SO RIGHT ♪
♪ WE GOTTA HAVE SOMETHING SO RIGHT ♪
TRANGE, BUT WE'RE TIGHT ♪
♪ WE
CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY USA NETWORK
AND U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION
CAN WE JUST AGREE ON ONE THING?
LET'S NEVER, EVER, EVER USE THE PHRASE
"THE BEAUTY OF THE BLENDED FAMILY" AGAIN.
IF WE EVER HAVE TO MENTION THE BEAUTY OF THE BLENDED FAMILY AGAIN,
WE'LL JUST SAY, "THAT THING WE THOUGHT EXISTED BUT DOESN'T."
CAN WE AGREE ON ONE OTHER THING?
YEAH.
THAT IF WE'RE DRIVING HOME FROM VERMONT TO NEW YORK
ON A COUNTRY ROAD AT NIGHT,
WE PROBABLY SHOULD TURN ON THE HEADLIGHTS.
[COW MOOS]
AAH!
JACK!
WELL, THEY STAND THERE LIKE THEY OWN THE WHOLE ROAD.
I'M SORRY.
I GUESS I'M JUST A LITTLE DISTRACTED.
DIDN'T TURN OUT TO BE MUCH OF A ROMANTIC SKI WEEKEND.
NOW, THAT'S THE UNDERSTATEMENT OF THE YEAR.
DON'T TURN O I'M ALL YOU
I'M SORRY.
I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THIS WHOLE THING WAS DOOMED
FROM THE WAY IT STARTED--
A RANDOM ACT OF KINDNESS.
I'M HERE WITH SOMETHING OF AN OLIVE BRANCH.
GOOD, BECAUSE WE WERE JUST ABOUT TO MAKE MARTINIS.
I TRY TO REACH OUT, HE JUST MAKES JOKES.
I DON'T KNOW WHY I BOTHER.
I DON'T KNOW WHY HE BOTHERS EITHER.
HONEY.
I'M SORRY. UH...
SHELDON, I FORGET. YOU'RE MORE THAN AN EX-SPOUSE,
YOU'RE ALSO A HUMAN BEING
AND APPARENTLY NOW AN OLIVE FARMER.
UH, WHAT'S THE BRANCH?
SARAH WOULD LIKE US ALL TO GET A BIT CLOSER,
SOME BIZARRE CHILDHOOD FANTASY.
BUT I, FOR ONE, WOULD LIKE TO GIVE IT A SHOT.
AND IN THAT SPIRIT, I'D LIKE TO OFFER YOU TWO
A SKIING WEEKEND AT MY PLACE IN STOWE.
THAT'S VERY SWEET, SHELDON.
I KNOW YOU HAVEN'T HAD A CHANCE TO GET AWAY ALONE,
AND I'D LIKE TO DO THIS FOR YOU.
YOU CAN BORROW MY CAR AND DRIVE UP IN STYLE.
WELL, WE REALLY APPRECIATE IT, BUT, UM...
I DON'T THINK THAT WE WOULD FEEL COMFORTABLE AT YOUR PLACE IN STOWE.
MAYBE YOU SHOULD ASK JACK.
OH, I DON'T HAVE TO ASK JACK.
JACK FEELS THE WAY I DO.
I MEAN, I KNOW HOW JACK FEELS,
AND WE JUST WOULDN'T FEEL COMFORTABLE THERE.
OK, THAT'S A SHAME.
TWO FEET OF FRESH SNOW.
SKI IN, SKI OUT. SNOWMOBILE, HOT TUB, HORSES.
YANNE
AND SNOWMOBILES AND HOT TUBS AND HORSES.
WELL, IT'S A LOVELY OLIVE BRANCH,
AND WE APPRECIATE THE GESTURE,
BUT WE JUST HAVE TO SAY NO.
WHEN WILL SHELDON EVER LEARN
THAT YOU CAN'T BUY PEOPLE'S AFFECTION?
I MEAN, HE STANDS THERE HOLDING OUT HIS LITTLE PIECE OF CANDY
EXPECTING ALL THE STARVING CHILDREN TO GATHER AROUND HIM
IN THE VILLAGE SQUARE
GRATEFUL THAT HE'S THROWN THEM A SWEET--
A CARAMEL, A GUMDROP, WHAT HAVE YOU.
WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT? THAT'S NOT HOW OUR VILLAGE WORKS.
WE'RE NOT STARVING.
EVEN IF WE WERE STARVING,
WE WOULDN'T GO TO SHELDON FOR CANDY.
WE WOULD MAKE OUR OWN CANDY.
SO IS IT, UM, REALLY SKI IN, SKI OUT?
YOU WANT TO GO?
WHAT AM I? SOME HUNGRY VILLAGER, HONEY?
BUT LIKE THE HUNGRY VILLAGER,
I'VE, UH, NEVER DRIVEN A SNOWMOBILE.
IT MIGHT BE FUN TO GO.
AND IT WOULDN'T BOTHER YOU TO GO TO A PLACE
WHERE SHELDON AND I HAVE SPENT ROMANTIC WEEKENDS?
THE PAST!
IT MEANS NOTHING, HONEY.
I MEAN, I KNOW THERE WERE ONE OR TWO GUYS BEFORE ME.
YOU'RE VERY KIND.
THAT WAS THEN, AND THIS
PLUS IT WOULD BE GOOD TO SHOW SHELDON
THAT WE'RE WILLING TO ACCEPT THE OLIVE BRANCH.
BE GOOD FOR, YOU KNOW, INTER-EX-SPOUSAL RELATIONS,
A PHRASE, I BELIEVE, I JUST NOW COINED.
IT DOES SOUND NICE.
BUT THEN WE WOULD OWE HIM SOMETHING.
BUT YOU'RE MISSING THE BEAUTY OF THIS, HONEY.
WE HAVE NOTHING OF VALUE TO OFFER.
WE CAN'T GO AWAY ON SUCH SHORT NOTICE.
WHAT WILL WE DO WITH THE KIDS?
WE CAN STAY BY OURSELVES.
OH, NO.
COME ON, GUYS.
FORGET IT.
CAN WE TALK SERIOUSLY FOR A SECOND?
NO. YOU CAN'T TALK SERIOUSLY TILL YOU'RE ABOUT 38.
YEAH, AND YOU HAVE AT LEAST ONE MARRIAGE UNDER YOUR BELT.
WE'RE VERY MATURE YOUNG ADULTS.
MATURE BEYOND OUR YEARS.
DUE TO CIRCUMSTANCES OF YOUR MAKING.
I MEAN, WE'RE NOT BABIES.
IT'S NEW YORK CITY. I MEAN, WHAT COULD HAPPEN?
WHAT HE MEANS IS THAT HELP IS NEVER FAR AWAY.
WELL, THANK YOU, SISTER.
YOU'RE WELCOME, DEAR BROTHER.
AND WE'VE BEEN GETTING ALONG JUST GREAT.
LET THIS WEEKEND BE A TRIAL RUN.
IMAGINE THE FREEDOM YOU GUYS COULD HAVE
KNOWING YOU CAN LEAVE US HERE ALONE.
IMAGINE THE FEELING WE'LL HAVE
KNOWING WE'VE EARNED YOUR TRUST.
SHE'S GOOD.
SHE'S FRIGHTENING.
SHOULD WE LEAVE THEM ALONE?
YOU'RE FRIGHTENING.
I'M JUST TRYING TO GIVE THEM THE BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT, HONEY.
NEVER DO THAT.
YOU'RE RIGHT. 3 KIDS IN NEW YORK
WITH AN APARTMENT ALL TO THEMSELVES.
[OLD-TIME ROCK 'N' ROLL PIANO INTRO]
♪ JUST TAKE THOSE OLD RECORDS OFF THE SHELF ♪
♪ I SIT AND LISTEN TO 'EM BY MYSELF ♪
♪ TODAY'S MUSIC AIN'T GOT THE SAME SOUL ♪
♪ I LIKE THAT OLD-TIME ROCK 'N' ROLL ♪
JACK, MAYBE A LITTLE RESPONSIBILITY
WOULD BRING OUT THE BEST IN THEM.
WHAT A WONDERFUL DINNER, WILL.
WELL, IF YOU STEAM THE VEGETABLES,
THEY RETAIN ALL THEIR NATURAL FLAVOR AND NUTRIENTS.
I JUST HAD A SUPERB IDEA.
LET'S NOT EAT ALL THE BRUSSELS SPROUTS TONIGHT.
LET'S SAVE SOME FOR TOMORROW'S AFTERNOON SNACK.
WAIT A MINUTE.
WHAT?
I THINK--
I THINK I JUST HAD A BRILLIANT IDEA.
YOU HAVE AN EX-HUSBAND WHO WANTS TO GIVE US A SKI WEEKEND.
WE HAVE 3 CHILDREN
WHO WANT A WEEKEND WITHOUT US,
AND I HAVE AN EX-WIFE WHO'S DYING TO PLAY MOMMY.
E CABIN,
AND ASK STEPHANIE TO DROP BY?
AND WE COULD ASK SHELDON TO STOP BY, TOO.
OH, IT SEEMS TOO SIMPLE.
IT'S THE BEAUTY OF THE BLENDED FAMILY.
THE BEAUTY OF THE BLENDED FAMILY.
ANOTHER PHRASE, I BELIEVE, I JUST COINED.
AMILY.
IT MAKES WHAT WE HAVE SOUND SO BEAUTIFUL,
WHY SHOULD IT BE A CURSE, HONEY?
WHY DON'T WE MAKE THE BLENDED FAMILY
WORK FOR US FOR A CHANGE?
THE BEAUTY OF THE BLENDED FAMILY.
PRECISELY.
THE BEAUTY OF D FAMILY.
SHALL WE SAY IT TOGETHER?
THE BEAUTY OF THE BLENDED FAMILY.
THE BEAUTY OF THE BLENDED FAMILY.
THAT IS A STUPID, STUPID PHRASE.
WELL, IT MAKES NO SENSE.
WE NOW KNOW THERE IS NO BEAUTY
IN THE BLENDED FAMILY,
ONLY TERROR, HEARTACHE, AND DESPAIR.
WELL, IT
WE HAVE SPENT MORE TIME DRIVING TO AND FROM VERMONT
THAN WE ACTUALLY SPENT IN VERMONT.
WE HAVE NO CHOICE.
.
OH, MY GOD.
TOLD YOU IT WAS SOMETHING.
HOW DID YOU EVER GIVE THIS UP?
WELL, HONEY, I GAVE IT UP
IN THE HOPE OF MEETING SOMEONE LIKE YOU.
N MANHATTAN
AND A BEACH HOUSE IN THE BAHAMAS.
ARE YOU SURE YOU MADE THE RIGHT CHOICE?
ONDER.
WHAT EXACTLY DOES SHELDON DO FOR A LIVING?
WELL, HE BUYS LOW AND SELLS HIGH,
AND HE'S NEVER THAT SAD WHEN A WAR BREAKS OUT.
I MUST SEEM REALLY ORDINARY IN COMPARISON.
CAN I JUST SAY ONE THING ABOUT ALL THIS?
NOT UNTIL YOU TELL ME I'M NOT ORDINARY.
OH, HONEY, YOU'RE NOT ORDINARY.
YOU'RE EXTRAORDINARY.
YOU'RE NOT JUST SAYING THAT 'CAUSE OF THE HAT?
NO, BUT THAT HAT DOES ADD A CERTAIN ZIP.
NO, IT'S JUST THAT, YOU KNOW,
SHELDON AND EVERYTHING THAT HE HAD
AND EVERYTHING THAT GOES WITH IT
DOESN'T MEAN ANYTHING IF YOU'RE NOT HAPPY,
AND I WASN'T REALLY THAT HAPPY,
SO ALL OF THIS WAS REALLY EASY TO LEAVE.
YOU'RE HAPPY
I DO KIND OF MISS THE PLACE IN THE BAHAMAS.
HEY!
JUST KIDDING.
FORGET ABOUT THE BAHAMAS
BECAUSE I AM ABOUT TO TAKE YOU TO THE WARM
AND FRIENDLY
ISLE OF JACK.
MMM, HOW'S THE WEATHER?
IT'S HOT. TAKE YOUR LONG JOHNS OFF.
WELL, THERE YOU ARE.
HELLO.
MAXINE!
OH, CARLY, LOOK AT YOU.
YOU LOOK TERRIFIC.
DIVORCING SHELDON AGREES WITH YOU.
IT AGREES WITH ME, TOO.
OH, MAXINE, THIS IS MY HUSBAND JACK.
HI, JACK, I'M MAXINE. NICE HAT.
RIGHT BACK AT YA.
I TAKE CARE OF THE PLACE.
SHELDON
ONLY SEEN HIM TWICE.
WELL, IT'S REALLY NICE MEETING YOU, MAXINE.
I'M JUST GONNA GO GET THE REST OF THE BAGS.
MAXINE, HOW'S YOUR HUSBAND?
WELL, YOU KNOW...
[IMITATING RESPIRATOR]
I SAY TURN THE DAMN THING OFF,
BUT THE V.A. KEEPS SENDING THE CHECKS,
AND I KEEP HIM PLUGGED IN.
WELL, YOU GOT PLENTY OF TOWELS.
THANKS, MAXINE. REALLY.
NOW, LISTEN, I'M JUST GONNA GET OUT OF YOUR WAY
SO YOU CAN START YOUR WEEKEND.
I'M GONNA CHOP SOME FIREWOOD
E SOUP.
SHE'S SWEET.
YEAH. SORT OF PAUL BUNYAN MEETS JULIA CHILD.
THINK WE SHOULD CALL THE KIDS?
NO. WHY SHOULD WE CHECK IN ON THE KIDS?
NSIBLE
CHECKING IN ON THE KIDS.
EVEN BETTER THAN ADULTS, THEY'RE PARENTS.
EVEN BETTER THAN PARENTS,
THEY'RE OUR KIDS' PARENTS.
NO, NO, YOU'RE RIGHT. YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT.
OF THE BLENDED FAMILY.
I'M IN CHARGE.
THEY ASKED ME FIRST. I GOT HERE FIRST. I'M IN CHARGE.
I DON'T BELIEVE THIS.
WHY DON'T WE JUST HAVE A VOTE THEN?
KIDS, WHO DO YOU THINK SHOULD BE IN CHARGE?
THIS IS WEIRD.
NICOLE, OBVIOUSLY I'VE GOT YOUR VOTE.
SARAH, I ASSUME YOU'RE WITH ME.
THAT MAKES WILL THE DECIDING VOTE.
Sheldon: WILL.
HAVE YOU SEEN THE NEW HUNDRED-DOLLAR BILL?
THIS IS AMAZING.
I MEAN, OUR KIDS ARE WITH PEOPLE
TO VARYING DEGREES,
AND WE'RE ALONE IN A CABIN IN VERMONT
COME HERE.
I JUST WANT TO STOP AND SOAK IN T.
OK, NOW I WANT TO MAKE LOVE.
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
OH, DAMN, IT'S THE KIDS.
HOW DO YOU KNOW?
WE'RE ABOUT TO MAKE LOVE.
WHO ELSE WOULD IT BE?
OHH.
HELLO.
QUICK QUESTION. WHO'S IN CHARGE?
Carl
WHO'S IN CHARGE, ME OR SHELDON?
STEPHANIE, WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
IT'S OBVIOUS THAT YOU DON'T TRUST ME FULLY.
THAT'S OK, BUT WE JUST NEED TO GET
THE PECKING ORDER STRAIGHT
IN CASE WE HAVE TO MAKE AN EXECUTIVE DECISION.
STEPHANIE, YOU'RE BOTH IN CHARGE.
WORK TOGETHER. ALL RIGHT?
OK.
BYE-BYE.
EXACTLY AS I THOUGHT.
I'M IN CHARGE.
WHAT WAS THAT ALL ABOUT?
NOTHING. IT WAS ABOUT A GALAXY FAR, FAR AWAY.
OOH.
SHOW ME THE FORCE.
WANT THE LIGHT FORCE OR THE DARK FORCE?
I'LL TAKE FORCE LITE. LESS CALORIES.
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
IT'S GEORGE LUCAS. WE'RE BEING SUED.
DID YOU TELL HER SHE WAS IN CHARGE?
YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING.
I'M A LOT MORE RESPONSIBLE THAN SHE IS.
CAN YOU TWO WORK THIS OUT TOGETHER,
OR DO WE HAVE TO COME BACK?
WHAT'S GOING ON?
NO, NO, NO, DON'T COME HOME.
WE'LL BE FINE, REALLY. WE'LL WORK IT OUT.
ALL RIGHT. WE'LL TALK TO YOU TOMORROW.
HT.
SHE SAID I'M IN CHARGE.
THERE THEY ARE AT EACH OTHER'S THROATS ALREADY.
THEY'RE LIKE TWO BABIES.
THEY JUST NEED LIMITS, HONEY.
THAT'S WHY WE LEFT THE KIDS THERE.
MAYBE WE SHOULD GO HOME.
I DON'T WANT TO SPEND MORE TIME IN THE CAR THIS WEEKEND
THAN WE IN VERMONT.
IT'D BE RIDICULOUS. WE'D BE IDIOTS.
OH, GOOD MORNING.
THERE'S COFFEE ON THE BAR.
OH, THANKS.
HOW DID YOU SLEEP?
ALL RIGHT.
WHAT'S WRONG?
OH, I DON'T KNOW.
WORRIED ABOUT THE KIDS, I GUESS.
JACK'S EX-WIFE AND SHELDON ARE CHECKING ON THEM,
BUT THEY DON'T GET ALONG.
THAT SOUNDS COMPLICATED.
OH, IT IS. IT'S AMAZING
WELL, I GUESS THAT'S THE BEAUTY OF THE BLENDED FAMILY.
IT'S AMAZING I ONLY DRINK COFFEE IN THE MORNING.
YEARS AGO I WORKED FOR A BLENDED FAMILY.
NICE GUY, 3 BOYS,
AND A LOVELY LADY WHO WAS BRINGING UP
3 VERY BEAUTIFUL GIRLS.
BUT IT WAS NOWHERE NEAR AS COMPLICATED
AS WHAT YOU'RE GOING THROUGH.
THEY HAD IT EASY. THEIR EXES WERE DEAD.
HOW ABOUT JACK?
IS HE ABLE TO FORGET ABOUT THE KIDS?
Jack: CARLY!
MAN!
NOW, THAT'S WHAT I CALL SKI IN, SKI OUT.
HE'S MANAGING.
NO, NO, NO, IT'S NOT 6 PIZZAS AT 10:00.
IT'S 10 PIZZAS AT 6:00.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
OH, THE KIDS WANTED TO HAVE SOME FRIENDS OVER TONIGHT.
I SAID IT WAS OK.
YOU'RE NOT HAVING A PARTY.
IT'S NOT A PARTY.
IT'S A BUNCH OF KIDS, SOME FOOD, SOME MUSIC,
AND A DISCO BALL.
FORGET IT.
WE ALREADY INVITED EVERYBODY.
WELL, UNINVITE THEM.
WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE SUCH A POOP?
I'M NOT A POOP.
YOU ARE, TOO.
YOU NEVER WANT TO HAVE ANY FUN.
OH, AND THAT MAKES ME A POOP.
HI.
OH, HI.
WE'RE FINE. I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU'RE CALLING.
YOU'VE GOT NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT.
THEY'VE GOT PLENTY TO WORRY ABOUT.
BE QUIET, YOU BIG POOP
WHAT'S GOING ON?
GET AWAY FROM ME!
WHAT WAS THAT?
NOTHING. JUST A SPIDER.
UM, COULD I TALK TO SHELDON?
OF COURSE YOU CAN TALK TO SHELDON.
THERE'S NO REASON YOU CAN'T TALK TO SHELDON.
SHELDON!
HE'S IN THE CAN. JUST A SECOND.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON,
BUT SHELDON WILL TELL US.
SHELDON, WE'RE SECOND-TEAM PARENTS.
WE NEVER GET THE KIDS ON OUR OWN TERMS,
NG UP.
PRETTY SOON THEY WILL BE ABLE TO SPEND TIME ON THEIR OWN.
LET'S SHOW THEM A GOOD TIME.
LET'S DO SOMETHING CRAZY.
IT'LL BE A GOOD CHANCE FOR YOU TO LOSE YOUR POOP HAT.
COME ON, DADDY.
GIVE
HI, CARLY.
SHELDON, I'M COUNTING ON YOU.
WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON DOWN THERE?
NOTHING.
EVERYTHING'S FINE. EVERYTHING'S UNDER CONTROL.
YOU DON'T HAVE TO COME HOME.
BUT IT SOUNDS LIKE YOU AND STEPHANIE
ARE AT EACH OTHER'S THROATS.
OH, NO, NO, NO. WE'RE HAVING LOTS OF FUN.
STEPHANIE'S GREAT.
YOU TAKE CARE.
HERE'S WHAT I'M HOPING.
I'M HOPING WE JUST REALLY OVERREACTED,
ING
NEUROTIC, PARANOID, AND INSANE.
I WOULD FEEL SO MUCH BETTER.
I MEAN, STEPHANIE HAS CALMED DOWN A LOT
SINCE SHE MOVED TO NEW YORK, HONEY.
I MEAN, SHE'S WAY MORE GROUNDED,
AND SHE'S WAY MORE MATERNAL.
[OLD-TIME ROCK 'N' ROLL PLAYS]
AND EVEN IF SHE HAS LOST CONTROL,
I MEAN, WE HAVE TO REMEMBER SHELDON'S THERE.
I MEAN, COME ON, JACK, SHELDON?
THAT'S LIKE HAVING THE HIGH SCHOOL PRINCIPAL WATCH YOUR KIDS.
[PIANO INTRO]
♪ JUST TAKE THOSE OLD RECORDS OFF THE SHELF ♪
♪ I SIT AND LISTEN TO 'EM BY MYSELF ♪
♪ TODAY'S MUSIC AIN'T GOT THE SAME SOUL ♪
♪ I LIKE THAT OLD-TIME ROCK 'N' ROLL ♪
♪♪ DON'T TRY TO TAKE ME TO A DISCO ♪
♪ YOU'LL NEVER EVEN GET ME OUT ON THE FLOOR ♪
♪ IN 10 MINUTES I'LL BE LATE FOR THE DOOR ♪
♪ I LIKE THAT OLD-TIME... ♪
HELLO?
HELLO?
IN THE KITCHEN.
THEY'RE BACK?
WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING HERE?
SOMETHING WRONG WITH THE CABIN?
NO, NO, THE CABIN'S FINE.
YEAH, THE CABIN WAS...FABULOUS.
UH, WE JUST-- WELL, THIS IS KIND OF SILLY NOW.
WE--WE WERE WORRIED.
YOU BOTH SOUNDED SO STRANGE ON THE PHONE.
OH, NO.
STEPHANIE AND I, WE'RE JUST KIND OF NEW
AT THIS CO-EX-SPOUSE PARENT THING
OR EX-CO-SPOUSE PARENT--
IT.
IT TOOK US A LITTLE WHILE
TO FIGURE IT OUT, THAT'S ALL.
YEAH, UH, WE NOW REALIZE WE HAD NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT,
UH, AND WE CAN'T THANK YOU ENOUGH.
ANYTIME.
YOU GUYS MUST BE EXHAUSTED.
WE'LL FINISH CLEANING UP IN HERE AND LET OURSELVES OUT.
YOU'VE DONE ENOUGH. BESIDES, WE DIDN'T HAVE ANY DINNER.
I'M GOING TO SCRAMBLE SOME EGGS.
[OLD-TIME ROCK 'N' ROLL PLAYS]
.
AND AGAIN, THANK YOU SO MUCH.
Carly: HONEY, WE'RE BEING RUDE.
DO YOU GUYS WANT SOME SCRAMBLED--
EGGS?
[OLD-TIME ROCK 'N' ROLL PLAYS]
LE BY
AND U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION
CAPTIONING PERFORMED BY THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE, INC.
PUBLIC PERFORMANCE OF CAPTIONS PROHIBITED WITHOUT PERMISSION OF NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE