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>>> TIME NOW FOR THE RIDICULIST.
TONIGHT WE ARE ADDING AN ACADEMY
AWARD NOMINEE AND PUBLIC
URINATEOR.
LAST NIGHT ON A FLIGHT, HE
REPORTEDLY PEED ON THE FLOOR.
THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT TOLD HIM HE
WOULD HAVE TO WAIT TO USE THE
BATHROOM UNTIL TAKEOFF.
WHEN I FIRST HEARD THIS STORY
THIS MORNING, I THOUGHT THERE
WAS NO WAY IT WAS REAL.
THE AIRLINE CONFIRMED IT BEYOND
ANY SHADOW OF SKEPTICISM.
I MEAN THEY VAGUELY TWEETED
ABOUT IT.
"AS YOU MAY HAVE SEEN ON THE
NEWS, WE'RE BUSY MOPPING THE
FLOOR OF ONE OF OUR PLANES THIS
MORNING.
QUESTION WOULD LIKE TO REMIND
ALL PASSENGERS THAT ALL OUR
PLANES ARE FULLY EQUIPPED WITH
TOILET FACILITIES."
THE AIRLINE WAS BUSY PUTTING THE
PEE BACK IN PR, SOME PASSENGERS
COULDN'T HOLD IT ANYMORE AND
STARTED SPILLING THEIR VERSIONS
OF THE INCIDENT TO THE PRESS.
THIS PROBABLY WON'T COME AS A
SHOCK BUT SEVERAL PASSENGERS SAY
THAT HE WAS VISIBLY DRUNK.
I THINK THERE'S ANOTHER
EXPLANATION.
AS A CELEBRITY HE'S NOT
ACCUSTOMED TO BEING TOLD HE
CAN'T DO THINGS HE WANTS TO DO
WHEN HE WANTS TO DO THEM.
THINGS LIKE GOING TO THE
BATHROOM.
HE'S PROBABLY USED TO BEING
PAMPERED.
I WOULD GO AS FAR AS TO SAY HE
DEPENDS ON IT.
PUT A GRAPHIC IN CASE YOU DIDN'T
GET THE REFERENCE.
DEPENDS ON IT.
SAD WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT IT.
THIS GUY HAS BEEN IN HUNDREDS OF
MOVIES.
WE'LL BE HE REMEMBERED FOR THAT?
PROBABLY NOT.
WILL HE BE REMEMBERED FOR "GREEN
CARD?"
PROBABLY NOT.
THIS INCIDENT WILL PROBABLY GO
DOWN AS HIS NUMBER ONE ROLE.
THERE'S A BRIGHT SIDE.
WILL YOU STOP LAUGHING.
DISTRACTING.
NOW THAT WE KNOW HE DOESN'T HAVE
ANY STAGE FRIGHT WHEN IT COMES
TO PUBLIC URINATION, MAYBE HE
CAN GET TOGETHER WITH HIS FELLOW
CASTMATES AND THEY HAVE A
*** CONTEST.
LIKE A PEE OFF.
THE MOVIE WAS ABOUT THAT.
SO AFTER HE TOOK HIS SOLO FLIGHT
TO URINATION, THE PLANE HAD TO
TURN AROUND AND GO BACK TO THE
GATE AND SOME UNLUCKY CLEANING
CREW HAD TO DEAL WITH THE
***.
HE HASN'T COMMENTED ON THIS
INCIDENT.
I KNOW YOU GOT IT.
ALL RIGHT.
SORRY.
SORRY.
THIS HAS NEVER ACTUALLY HAPPENED
TO ME.
YOU SEE THIS ON YOUTUBE AND YOU
DON'T THINK IT WILL ACTUALLY
HAPPEN TO YOU.