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If you were my boyfriend, I'd never let you go.
I’d hide you in my basement, nobody has to know.
With this shock collar you'll do everything I say,
And with my magic love spell you'll fall for me right away.
Swag! Swag! Swag!
On you.
Chillin’ on my bed while we’re eatin' fondue.
You don't know me but I know all about you,
So say hello to the chloroform in three two,
Swag!
We're gonna do,
anything I want.
Hey boy,
I just kidnapped you.
If you were my boyfriend,
Never let you go.
Keep you on my arm boy,
You'd never be alone.
Show you off to all my friends,
Spend all of your dough.
If you were my boyfriend,
I'd never let you go,
I'd never let you go.
Tell me that you love me, tell her that you don't.
We could start some Buzz right here, tweet across the globe.
Let's flood the Staples Center, you rented it once before,
We can reenact Titanic Jack, while floating on a door,
Burr.
Girlfriend, girlfriend,
I could be your girlfriend.
I could be your girlfriend until the f***in world ends.
I’ll make you dance, and talk about me on Ellen.
Don't wanna to sound crazy, but I'm a convicted felon.
Swaggie!
I have to pee.
Quiet, no you don't.
It's the cops!
Let 'em talk to you.
If you were my boyfriend, never let you go.
Hiding you in plain sight, nobody seems to know.
Give that cop an autograph, or i might lose control.
If you were my boyfriend, I'd never let you go.
I'd never let you go.
Please untie my hands,
I still gotta pee, girl.
I've been kidnapped for a week, okay I'll call you my girlfriend.
Baby I am your man,
I’ll never leave you girl.
I’ve just gotta briefly step outside...
(oh my god!) Please don't act that way. (Please do not kill me)
You can run all you want boy,
but you'll never get away.
(gotta get away!)
We can play the Hunger Games, (you maniac!)
let me grab my bow. (no! please don't!)
Now that you're my boyfriend, (boyfriend?)
I'll never let you go,
(stop calling me your boyfriend!)
I'll never let you go.
Na na na, na na na, na na na.
Yeah boy!
Na na na, na na na, na na na. Hey!
Na na na, na na na, na na na. Hey!
Na na na, na na na.
If you were my boyfriend.
Honey? Are you playing kidnap Justin Bieber again?
Sorry, mom!
It's just so much fun!
Oh, you kids and your music...
Okay! Have fun!
(muffled screaming)
MANIACAL LAUGH!!!