Tip:
Highlight text to annotate it
X
♪ That's my mama ♪
♪ That's my mama ♪
♪ She's the force that gives me strength ♪
♪ Oh, yeah ♪
♪ That's my mama ♪
♪ That's my mama ♪
♪ A blue-ribbon homemaker ♪
♪ Yeah ♪
♪ That's my mama ♪
♪ That's my mama ♪
♪ I'm talking about my mama ♪♪
[ Grunts ]
♪♪ [ Whistling ]
Huh?
[ Exhales ] There you go, my man Freddie.
[ Chuckles ]
Yeah. Take a look at that, brother, and tell me what you think.
Earl! What kind of haircut is this?
Look at these ears! They standin' out like the fins on a '59 Cadillac!
What are you talkin' about?
Just take it easy on Earl, Freddie.
He's still feeling his way.
Unfortunately, he's feelin' it on your head.
Wait a minute, man. Wait a minute. Now, I gave you a classy haircut, man-- classy.
how to
[ Chuckles ]
You don't know Afro Sheen from Bishop Sheen.
Wow. What's that dude complaining about, man?
Everybody know the earlobes are a "homogenized" zone.
Say, uh, where we goin' tonight, Cliff?
Oh, well, uh, half of us has a date.
huh?
Are you keepin' score?
I'm keepin', brother. Yeah, I'm keepin',
Uh, who's the lucky chick you're going out with tonight?
Gloria.
You goin' out with Glor-- Ooh! She is one gorgeous lady, man,
with those long, long legs-- huh?
Traveling all the way up to that tiny waist. [ Laughs ]
And if you keep going north from there, you won't miss a couple other points of interest.
Whoo! One fine woman, man.
You need a third for a barbershop trio?
Judy Hendricks! Oh-ho! Hey, stuff!
What's happenin', brother?
Judy Hendricks. Wow, I can't believe it. The European traveler.
Oh, a couple of days ago.
I haven't even gotten over my jet lag yet.
My body still thinks it's in Europe.
And you know something? I would've been happy to leave it there.
Oh, come on. You look just great.
ks.
it? around
Oh, it is so great to see you two.
pening?
Uh, nothing much.
Wait just a second. Nothing much?
now.
I graduated from barber college with a B.A.--
Bachelor's of Afros, huh?
And once Earl gives a guy an Afro, he'll always be a bachelor.
e.
You was always up on the D.C. dirt.
I want to know everything-- who got married, who got divorced,
Hmm.
- Langford Harris. - Langford Harris what?
Did he get married, divorced, or did he die?
All three, baby. He won the triple crown.
r.
Mmm. Judy, so tell me all about Paris, Rome--
[ Mama ]
Hey, I'll talk to him, whoever he is.
It's not a him. It's a her.
right back.
Mrs.
What a surprise! [ Laughs ]
- How was Europe? - Mmm, okay.
I went there trying to forget an old boyfriend--
Chuck Webber-- which I did,
and now I'm back in Washington trying to forget Giovanni Contadini.
Mmm, I'm sorry to hear that.
Oh, it's okay. The way I figure it, I mu
w many people y struck out
[ Laughs ]
Ooh, well, I know you two lot to talk about.
You know, I'm lookin' at Let's Make a Deal.
Monty Hall is about to break the heart of a lady on welfare.
Oh, Cliff. So tell me, what's been happening?
Oh, lots of things. I, uh--
s?
Well, last June, we got the tragic news that the Wet Head was dead.
Uh, why did the girl break the date?
The phone call was from a girl,
ding ..
Yeah. She has a cold. So she says.
ten sick, a better time.
Ow! We sure do!
Yeah, and I got two tickets to a rock concer
Don Corleone and the Potato Chip Band.
Sounds like a great place to talk.
Oh, don't worry. It gets real quiet during the drug busts.
Laughs ]
Ooh! What a place to hold an outdoor concert.
Yeah. Outside.
[ Water Running ]
- Hey, is that your toilet? - Mm-hmm.
Nothing can save it. It's even beyond jiggling.
Wow, that's gonna
there!
e
Hey, Judy.
I'll just push this down l
[ Creaking ]
[ Water Spraying ]
Clifton!
[ Laughs ]
You ever been spit on by the Ty-D-Bol man?
I'm sorr somethin
Gee, that water's cold.
Oh, thank you. Mmm.
[ Exhales ] Oh.
Well, at least the toilet's fixed, huh?
[ Laughing ]
s you.
[ Muttering ]
Come here.
I, uh--
I thought we were just friends.
In an hour, we'll be friends again.
♪♪ [ Scatting ]
Judy, Judy, Judy. Mmm.
So, that's who you went out with last night-- Judy.
ise.
- What's wrong with Judy? - Oh, nothing. None of my business.
dream girl
Tina Turner. [ Chuckles ]
I don't care. No.
I know Junior's gonna walk in and--
[ Imitating Junior ] Ooh-whee!
I just heard the bad news.
The word on the street says, Cliff,
you goin' out with a girl whose looks started at the bottom,
then worked their way down.
But I don't care. Nah.
No, I don't care if Earl says--
[ Laughing ]
[ Imitating Earl ] Cliff, that girl needs head and shoulders,
and I don't mean the shampoo.
Not gonna let it get to me.
See-- [ Chuckles ] I don't care what people think.
How I feel is the important thing.
Yeah. They can laugh at me if they want--
[ Laughs ] but I couldn't care less.
- Clifton? - Huh?
If you don't care so much, why do you care so much?
[ Chuckling ] That's a laugh.
Besides, maybe they won't find out.
rue.
I was worried too much friends
e,
That don't make any sense.
Mmm,
But not making sense is the only way you can win at love and romance...
and politics.
]
That must be Earl opening up the shop.
Sounds more like somebody wants to open up Earl.
inct ]
Oh, Freddie. Look, man. Your hair's fine, man. Fine.
You just had an ugly mirror.
Cliff-- Cliff, can you do a repair job on my hair, man?
Repair job? Freddie, you've been totaled.
I'll kill him.
Take it easy, man. Sit down. I'll see what I can do.
Freddie, do me a favor. Forget your haircut, man.
ing out.
I want to know where you went, what you did with--
♪♪ Gloria ♪
Hey, wait a minute. Wait a minute. Who's this Gloria?
Who's Gloria? Man,
Clif abou
Ask me where I've just been.
First, the ears. Now, the mouth.
ou asked.
I have just come from the slammer.
I was visitin' my cousin Chauncy-- What happened to your ears?
- Earl happened to 'em. - Mm, mm-mm-mm.
Say, Earl, let me tell you about this slammer my cousin Chancy is in.
Junior, boy, listen. Now, wait a minute. We got much more important things...
[ Clears Throat ]
I'd rather hear about Chauncy's slammer, myself.
Yeah, man, listen. It's one of those minimum security prisons.
n't find
"Solitary" means they make you play golf by yourself.
- Cliff, please tell-- - Earl, will you listen to Junior?
I think it would do us all some good to learn something about our nation's penal system.
Man, I'm talkin' 'bout prison.
See, Chauncy wanted me to tell him all about
with Don Corleone and the Potato Chip Band.
Hey, man, that concert was somethin' else.
I mean, people was clappin' they hands and stampin' they feet.
- You say that Don had his chips together, huh? - No, it was cold.
- I thought Clifton was gonna freeze to death. - [ Laughing ]
Yeah. So that's where you went, old blood.
You took her to the concert, huh? [ Laughs ]
[ Clears Throat ] Say, um, anybody watch Merv Griffin Show last night?
Yeah, that Mary Allen. Boy, every time he says, "Hello, there"-- cracks me up.
Wait a minute, now. If you was at the concert, and you saw who Cliff was with,
tell Freddie about--
♪ Gloria ♪
♪♪ [ Scatting ]
[ Together ] ♪♪ It's Gloria ♪♪
't with Gloria. f?
Cousin?
Bodyguard?
You see, at first I thought this chick was Judy Hendricks, only Judy's out of town.
Come to think of it, this chick looked like out of town--
[ Laughing ]
You didn't take out Judy, did you, Cliff?
, Cliff.
Talk to Big Earl, baby.
Oh-ho.
You didn't take Gloria out. No wonder he didn't wanna talk about it.
I mean, if someone ask about last night's steak dinner,
you don't go all out your way to tell 'em you only had a Big Mac.
[ Hooting ]
Hey, now, come on, now.
She's no Gloria, but Judy's .
- [ Together ] Whoo-- - Hey, man, now, stop. You be light on my friend.
Me? Have a thing for Judy? Get serious.
Right on. Right on.
Yeah. Uh, to me she's-- well-- she's just like one of the guys.
Good, because that's what she looks like-- one of the guys.
I'm off the phone now, Clifton. You can call Judy now.
I'll make the call later. It's not that important.
[ Barking, Howls ]
I can't believe you still home on a Saturday night.
What's the big deal about Saturday night?
r.
This Judith thing's really gotten you down, hasn't it, Clifton?
.
Yuma, Arizona. Sammy Ballard, a two-foot"--
na
Oh, Mom, I've seen Dad's picture before.
h.
[ Ch
No, he looks more like the frog.
You know, your daddy came from a long line of bad-lookin' people.
.
that two was about all the good-lookin' children we were gonna get outta Oscar's genes.
Hm. But to me, he's-- oh, he's just beautiful...
on the inside, and that's where it counts.
Inner beauty lasts longer.
You know, a good disposition doesn't start to sag over the years,
and you don't get wrinkles on your good sense of humor.
Hm-hmm. That ugly guy was one beautiful man.
[ Chuckles ]
Hmm?
- Thanks. - [ Doorbell Rings ]
All right.
Cliff, man, throw on your jacket and let's go.
Where?
Hunting. Man, we gonna go hunting fox. [ Imitates Hunting Horn ]
He's right, man. Tonight's the night.
There's so many ladies out there, even Earl could get lucky.
Shut up, Dumbo.
You two guys go ahead, man. I'm just gonna stay home and relax.
What, on a Saturday night? What you gonna do, watch Bob Newhart say--
[ Stammering ] "U-U-Uh, Emily"-- huh?
Come on, man. is Saturday .C.
Come on, man. Are or a
Right on. Come on.
I bet you do.
♪ Gloria ♪ ♪♪ [ Scatting ]
No.
"No"? Oh, Cliff.
l me you goin' out with ys" Judy, huh?
That's enough, Earl!
[ Shouts ] Hey, shut up!
Now, I'll tell you who I mean. I mean, "a girl I happen to like" Judy.
You know? So if you don't quit dumpin' on her,
you gonna lose your job, your friend and maybe a couple of teeth.
t a minute.
I'm sorry, brother. I was out of place.
Now, if you dig Judy, it's cool, okay? All right?
Earl!
Cliff, what I'm tryin' to say is that...
there are a lot of great, great-sounding records that have lousy-lookin' album covers--
It was Earl tryin' to be funny.
Well, what makes him think he has to try?
All right.
Mmm, that man sure was short.
[ Knocking ]
Hi, Judy.
came over.
I've been a little worried about you.
Yeah, well,
days later,
Me too.
we both feelin' good the same reason.
I-- Huh? Uh, yeah. Sure.
[ Chuckles ] Yeah. That's why I'm feelin' so good, see?
'Cause, uh, Junior told me how you and Chuck were back together again--
yeah-- and, wow, it made me so happy.
In fact, made me so happy I had to rush right on over here and tell you how happy I am.
[ Giggles ]
Yeah. You and Chuck. Chuck and you.
Oh. That's the reason for the suitcase.
Chuck is takin' me to Virginia Beach for the weekend.
What?
I said, uh, you better take ome ground round. Yeah--
in case you wanna make a hamburger, you know?
Clifton, for a guy that's supposed to be so happy, you sure don't look it.
It's that girl that broke the date with you-- Gloria, right?
I knew it.
You know, that's the first time I've heard her name this week without somebody singin' it?
Gloria? You mean-- ♪ Gloria ♪
♪♪♪ [ Scatting ]
[ Giggles ] Ooh, I gotta go.
- Can I help you with your bag? - Oh, no. It's very light.
Chuck says, I won't be needing a lot of clothes.
Sure. What?
h watering Chuck is probably waiting dow
Great.
Mwah!
Ooh, just be gentle with my philodendron.
- Don't tell me. Tell Chuck. - Bye, Clifton.
Closes ]