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Milton Bradley might not be known as a heavyweight in the video game world... these days, anyway.
In the late 70’s and early 80’s, though, the publisher of Battleship and Connect Four
had a hand in several dealings, most notably early hardware offerings like the Vectrex
and Microvision. But perhaps their greatest contribution was their association - and publishing
agreement - with a developer out of Twycross Studios in England that would prove to have
the greatest effect on the video game landscape. Before the bear and bird, before Mr. Bond,
heck, before Donkey Kong got wise and embraced the third dimension, there was work to be
done. Captain Skyhawk had to rid the planet of aliens.
In his don’t-call-it-an-F-14 fighter plane, Captain Skyhawk blasts his way through alien
forces which, for whatever reason, have decided to arm themselves with RC cars, large fan-things,
and weird-looking pyramids on the ground which can pop open and fire a single bullet at a
time. With your various and sundry weapons systems, your task is to... well, that depends
on the stage. Sometimes it’s “Blast through everything in your way, including a large
alien base at the end of the stage.” Sometimes it’s “Drop supplies to our resistance
scientists operating in holes in the ground,” which makes me wonder why they’re advertising
their position to the enemy with big arrows and whatnot. Seems irresponsible, if you ask
me. Still other segments have you leaving the isometric battlefields and taking to the
air, to blast hostiles out of the sky as you make your way toward this rapidly-spinning
space station, where you must line yourself up and dock. Easier said than done, but it’s
worth it for the power-ups that are to follow.
That’s all well and good, but the unfortunate side is that the controls are a bit finnicky.
One slight movement and your plane’s flopping all over the place, into walls, oncoming fire,
or the front of a space station if your angle is off. Fortunately, I’m fully instrument-rated
for Microsoft Flight Simulator, but even that isn’t enough to really get a handle on this
thing. On the upshot, though, the fields you travel are fairly diverse, and have a number
of different paths to travel instead of just being a straight corridor through to the boss.
A little diversity goes a long way - even if the stages are fairly detail-less, looking
like more of a monochrome checkerboard with the occasional slope or pyramid. But consider
it from 1990’s standpoint: that 3D feeling, primitive as it may be, was still miles ahead
of the pack.
There’s nine missions in total, alternating between the ground strikes, aerial combat,
and occasional docking challenges. The more foes you down during each mission, the more
credits you’ll have available for upgraded guns, missile restocks, and other bonuses
to make your life a little easier. But let’s get to the crux of the matter: Who the heck
uses evil fans to repel fighter planes? Is this what we really needed? Nuts to Star Wars
or other missile-interception systems, we just needed some fans mounted up and down
the coasts? Along with some RC cars. Or, heck, we can upgrade to Big Wheels! This is America,
after all, there’s a reason we outfit our toddlers with SUVs! Right. Fans and little
kids with guns, all up and down the coasts. Your tax dollars at work, folks. You can thank
me later for solving our defense crisis. That is, at least, until the aliens attack. Then
all bets are off.