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Shut Up! Cartoons, bro.
Hello, Nurse Kimberly.
Hello, Haunches, nice to see you again. If you don't mind, could you
please take Mr. Gerard for a walk?
Sure. I'd love to --
For the last time, Clarence, if you don't have 50 K, you can't attend
the investors seminar - oh, hi. What the hell are you doing here?
I should be asking you the same thing!
What does it look like? I'm volunteering!
No you're not. You're ripping off old people!
I am presenting them with a unique investment opportunity. You're welcome
to join me if you'd like.
I don't know...
There's free cake!
Now, I don't need to tell you that the number 1 problem facing the
youth of today is hamburgers. There you are, trying to sit and enjoy a
cup of coffee in your local restaurant, when in walks some punk
kids with their skateboards and their rap music demanding
hamburgers!
But what if there was no need for them to get their hamburgers in a
restaurant? Crazy talk, you say? Not with my revolutionary new
invention: the hamburger fax machine!
I want to watch my programs!
Zip it, old man! I'm going to take your investment and triple - no,
quadruple it almost overnight!
Get to the point!
Okay, okay. Basically, what you see before you is a fax machine. Only,
instead of paper, it is used to send and receive hamburger patties,
tomatoes and a bun!
What about the lettuce?
I hate lettuce! You don't need lettuce on your hamburger!
What about the condiments?
You can put those on yourself! Look, the point is, when teenagers no longer
need to go to a restaurant to get their hamburgers, the streets will
be safe for old people like you to sit your wrinkly a--es down in a
booth for 5 hours while you milk a $.35 cup of coffee!
Does this really work?
It's so easy, a child could do it!
This is the latest and greatest in state-of-the-art machinery.
The hamburger gets digitized with an 8- bit signal and...
Voila ! One hamburger. Hot and juicy, just the way you remember it
from the 40s!
You Suck! You're the worst magician I've ever seen!
We want Doug Henning!
You're not getting Doug Henning! Now are you going to give
me your money or what?
Come on folks, I'll take you to look at the ducks on Miller's
Pond.
Where do you think you're going?
You should be ashamed of yourself, young man! Trying to take advantage
of the elderly like that.
Son of a b----!