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Lexus Review For Jalopnik part 2
I decided to drive to IKEA with my girlfriend—a mistake for many reasons, but I will focus here on the “drive” portion.
I was shocked to learn the extent of disregard for traffic safety laws by my fellow citizens of Brooklyn.
No clear and open stretch of roadway could be found.
Here is a semi truck doing an eight-point turn in the middle of the road; here is a delivery van double parked in the lane; here are crowds of pedestrians who seem to have mistaken the road for the sidewalk, ambling at devil-may-care speed just inches from your side view mirrors; here is a guy rolling his wheelchair down the middle of an on-ramp asking for change.
(I gave him a dollar, due to the guilt that came with sitting in a Lexus.).
The harrowing 20-minute ordeal of making my way to IKEA resembled a life-and-death game of “Frogger” more than a relaxing drive on a summer’s day.
Though these contemptible unsafe and congested conditions cannot be directly blamed on the Lexus corporation, they can certainly be indirectly blamed on the Lexus corporation, and all other car companies that clog our urban streets with automobiles in the same way that the Burger King corporation clogs our arteries with cholesterol.
The next time you are stuck in slow-moving traffic, I urge you to pass the time by reading over the New York City strategic transportation plan, a document full of common-sense ideas for lessening the impact of cars in our fair city.
“Why can’t we pass a strong congestion pricing plan to discourage driving in our urban core?” you may wonder as you leaf through the printout, glancing up occasionally to check for obstacles in your path.
“Why don’t we just tax the hell out of gasoline and pour that money into upgrading the MTA’s infrastructure?” you may ask yourself as you jerk the wheel to avoid a dead bicyclist.
Nothing will make you wish for a comprehensive plan to eliminate driving in New York City more than driving in New York City.
Upon my safe (thank god) return from IKEA, I sensibly stashed the car in the parking garage for the remainder of the weekend.
How I yearned to be free from its metallic yoke!.
This vulgar Lexus costs more than $85,000.
I am not one to tell people how to spend their money—I will leave the rants against needless luxury goods to the angry American underclass that will surely come beating down your door all too soon.
I will simply note that instead of buying this Lexus, you could invest the purchase price in conservative financial instruments and, in 35 years, have enough money to purchase an entire city bus for the MTA.
What a lovely legacy that would be—the one vehicle that actually deserves to be on our city streets, plying its sensible route thanks to your kindness.
Or, you could buy an ugly car that will be in a landfill by then.
The choice is yours.
I’m told the Lexus has heated seats, but I couldn’t figure out how to turn them on.