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Gautam Raghavan: Good morning, everybody.
Audience Members: Good morning.
Gautam Raghavan: My name is Gautam Raghavan,
and I work here at the White House as the liaison to the
lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender community,
and I wanted to say thank you for being here for what I
believe is one of the most special and important events
we're going to host here at the White House this summer.
You know, each week we honor a group of ordinary citizens who
are doing extraordinary things to improve and strengthen their
communities around the country.
We do this because we know that the best solutions and the most
innovative ideas come from people and organizations around
the country and because real, lasting,
meaningful change is led by ordinary citizens,
not by Washington.
As part of the Champions of Change program,
we've honored breast cancer survivors and green jobs
creators, Rotary Club members, and domestic violence
prevention advocates.
And just last week I know many of you saw we honored
individuals and organizations who are on the front lines doing
tremendous work to end youth homelessness.
So this week we're very proud to be honoring six Champions of
Change: Three individuals, two organizations, and one ensemble,
who are working tirelessly to ensure safety, dignity,
and equality for the lesbian, gay, bisexual,
and transgender community around the country.
And you don't have to take my word for it.
As many of you know, their commitment to equality is
demonstrated in the videos they submitted as part of our
video challenge.
And if you haven't had a chance to see them yet, don't worry,
we'll play them throughout the morning so you can -- you have a
chance to see them then.
So this morning you'll be able to hear from each of these
champions about their life and their work,
their struggles and obstacles, and the many ways in which
they've succeeded.
And I know all of you will be incredibly inspired and
impressed and touched by everything that they
have to say.
But to get things started, I am honored to introduce
someone who is truly a Champion of Change for the LGBT community
within the Obama Administration, so please join me in a warm
welcome for the highest ranking openly gay member of the Obama
Administration, Director John Berry.
(applause)
Director John Berry: Thank you.
Thank you very much, and good morning.
We are so happy to have you here at the White House,
and it is such a joyous day, and such an honor to be with
each of you.
Thank you for what you're doing, and Gautam,
thank you for your leadership.
You're a phenomenal leader in our community as well as this
administration, and we're fortunate to have you.
Each of you are an important part of our history.
Not just as part of the moment, but as also part of shaping
the moment.
As educators, musicians, community leaders,
and now as video stars and producers,
you are leading changes in our nation.
For those of you who are a little older,
like me and George -- (laughter) you can see and feel the change,
not only in laws and regulations, but in attitudes.
I spoke at a conference two weeks ago,
the National Council of La Raza, where the proud parents of an
openly gay teenager asked me if I had advice for their son.
Let's just dwell on that for a moment.
The proud parents of an openly gay teenager.
Not every home is welcoming, as far too many of you here may
know all too well.
But thankfully, more now are.
And through your efforts, more will be.
I went through my teenage years in the fear that my parents
would never be proud of the real me.
I didn't think I'd be able to participate in any of this,
in government, if I was open and honest about myself.
A little history for some of you younger in the audience today.
When I came out, the laws on the books in over 20 states
said that I was a criminal for being gay.
Categorically, no gay man or lesbian could hold a top level
security clearance.
In 1996, when my first partner died of AIDS,
I was grateful that he was able to do so at home,
and not at a hospital that could easily have barred me
from his side.
All of this, the fear, the discrimination,
the deep hurts that so many have suffered, thankfully,
they are fading into the past.
We now live in a nation where a President declares that
hospitals may not bar same sex partners from their loved
one's bedsides.
We live in a nation now where gays and lesbians no longer have
to live a lie to serve the country they love in
our armed forces.
A nation where hate crimes are against the law of our land,
and a nation where our President openly states his personal
support for our marriage equality.
(applause) This Administration makes change that sticks,
and it does it by doing it right.
And the best news is, we ain't done yet.
Let me just leave you with one final thought.
Ulysses Grant, when he left the White House,
was the first president to travel around the world.
And wherever he went -- this is in the age of before celebrity,
before videos -- he was the widest known living person of
his day.
And so wherever he went, he attracted huge crowds.
He was the first president to go to China, the Middle East,
and every country of Europe.
And when he was in Germany, I feel sorry for the poor guy
who introduced him, but he introduced Grant as the man who
saved the Union.
And Grant got up, and he put his speech aside,
and he turned and he upbraided the man who had introduced him.
And in doing so, he spoke from the heart,
and it still rings today.
He said if I had never served, if I had never held command,
if I had fallen dead, if every Union general fell dead,
there were 10,000 in line behind us ready to pick up the flag and
cause of the Union and carry it home to victory.
As long as our youth hold that fervor,
there is no fear for our Union.
You are champions.
You are the 10,000 of this day, and you carry our liberty and
our seeking for equal treatment under the law forward day after
day through your example, through your vision,
through your passion.
God bless you for what you have done.
God bless each of you in the room for what you will yet do,
and may God always bless the United States of America.
Thank you, and congratulations.
(applause) Thank you all.
quick photo with the Director.
Gautam Raghavan: We're just going to take a
John Berry: I'm going to sit next to George here.
Gautam Raghavan: And let's -- hold on one second.
John Berry: Gautam thinks of everything.
All right.
Congratulations.
Thank you George, thank you for your service.
Gautam Raghavan: All right.
Director John Barry: I'll get out of your way.
Thank you, Gautam.
Gautam Raghavan: Thank you, sir.
Absolutely.
So thank you, Director Berry.
What we're going to do now is just read off the
list of the Champions.
Please feel free to applaud wildly for all of them.
Don't hold it for the end.
(laughter) We're going to start -- I hate that.
We're going to start, right next to me is the Redwood String
Ensemble, which was formed in 2009 through the very
prestigious Oberlin Conservatory of Music, where the ensemble,
consisting of -- Summer Lusk, Mckenzie Bauer,
Lauren Spaulding, and Rachel Grandstrand,
studied under the tutelage of Viola Professor Karen Ristcher.
Ristcher.
Gautam Raghavan: Yes.
And Violin Professor Marilyn McDonald.
So please give them a round of applause.
(applause) Standing next to them we have representing the
Military Acceptance Project, Kristen and Adam.
MAP, Military Acceptance Project,
promotes acceptance of all service members, veterans,
and their families through enlightenment, empowerment,
and service.
As service members, combat veterans,
military family members and active supporters of the
military, MAP's founders believe that all people who willingly
support and defend the Constitution of the United
States deserve to feel accepted and be treated equally in their
daily lives.
So please give them a round of applause.
(applause and cheers) You've got some fans.
On the far, on your far right are David and Terry
with CenterLink, the community of LGBT centers,
which supports the development of strong, sustainable,
LGBT community centers to build a unified center movement.
Founded in 1994, the organization now assists
over 200 LGBT centers around the United States,
and through them over 1.7 million people,
in addressing the challenges they face by helping them
improve their organizational and service delivery capacity and
increase access to public resources.
Please applaud them.
(applause) Seated here to your far left is George Stewart,
a former Army Clerk and U.S.
Air Force Court Reporter.
He currently lives in Harlem, New York,
where he sings in church show choirs.
You might ask him for a little show a little later,
and volunteers at the Harlem Office of Services and Advocacy
for GLBT Elders, or SAGE.
A featured speaker at the opening of the country's first
innovative LGBT Senior Center, the SAGE Center,
George spoke on behalf and speaks today on behalf of
thousands of New York City LGBT elders who need the programs,
services, and advocacy that SAGE provides.
Please give him a round of applause.
(applause and cheers) Next we have JJ Kahle.
Did I say that right, JJ?
JJ Kahle: Yes.
Gautam Raghavan: Yes.
Who's a Spanish teacher at The Blake School in Minneapolis,
where she also serves in the Office of Equity
and Community Engagement.
JJ is a faculty advisor for the Gay Straight Alliance of Blake,
as well as their Justice League, a social justice student group.
She lives in South Minneapolis with her partner Judy and
their children.
Please welcome her.
(applause and cheers) And last but not least,
from my home state, the great State of Washington,
is Heather Carter, who developed and now runs OUTLoud,
a LGBT youth suicide prevention program at the Youth Suicide
Prevention Project.
Heather also serves on a state-wide committee to oversee
the implementation of HB 1163, Washington's anti-bullying law.
In partnership with the Suicide Prevention Resource Center,
she's also a member in a community of practice focused on
LGBT youth suicide prevention, and she provides trainings
throughout Washington State and the country on the issues of
LGBT youth suicide and bullying and bias-based harassment.
So please give her a round of applause.
(applause and cheers) So as you can see,
we have an incredibly distinguished and passionate
group of champions up here.
What we're going to do now is I'm going to ask all of the
champions to take a seat or seats,
so please make room for them in the audience,
and we're going to watch the first batch of videos.
So please.
Whenever you're ready, Andy.
(video playing)
JJ Kahle: The suicide epidemic in Anoka-Hennipen has
awakened all of us.
Alison: Lately we've been talking a lot about teen
suicides in the Anoka- Hennipen School District.
JJ Kahle: In a time when the school could have been a great
comfort, a movement here that started with just a few students
who went on a trip to Washington to the March,
GLBT March in Washington in 1999,
and those youth came back and decided they wanted to
start a GSA.
I started as an advisor for he Gay Straight Alliance,
what we call the GSA, 12 years ago.
When we first started meeting, maybe five kids would show up,
and it was the same five kids every week,
and sometimes it was even fewer.
When I tried to put up posters around the school I would start
at one end and put posters up, and by the time I got back
around some of them had already been torn down.
If students don't have class, they can sit in here and kind of
do a double GSA and then be here in the interim.
It just so happened that one year I had a lot of students who
would stay the whole time, and that interim time would kind of
be like we'd get rid of the programming and agenda and we'd
just talk.
And I'll never forget, one lunch five kids came out,
just like that.
And I just sat there and I thought, wow, okay.
The demographics here just changed.
Alison: She was actually the first person I came out to,
which was interesting, because I didn't really know her that
well, but she just had the reputation of being so
supportive of everyone.
I used to be totally terrified of discussing any sort of GLBT
related concept, and now I've gone out with our Justice League
and presented at Creating Change.
I've talked to aspiring teachers at the U of M,
just really kind of found my voice in the community.
Bekka: It's fun to know that my classmates have all been
thinking about this issue, and they are on the same page as me.
JJ Kahle: We have students in relationships, dates, you know,
everything that goes along with the high school culture.
Alison: It's actually uncool to go around using
homophobic slurs.
JJ Kahle: We are the school that lets our gay kids be
happy in who they are.
It doesn't turn us into a *** and Gomorrah,
it doesn't turn us into some kind of a gay recruitment
factory, what it means that is our GLBT kids are more likely to
be invested, more likely to be their best selves,
their best athletes, their best academics, and their best arts.
We're talking about acceptance and embracing of people's
differences, and realizing that we're a stronger,
better place if we have all of our voices heard, you know,
and they're finding their voices.
They're feeling pride.
They're not going to live in a closet any more.
They're not going to take the injustice any more.
Then we've gotten somewhere.
(end of video) (applause)
(video playing)
Off-screen Voice: I was absolutely bullied
as a teenager.
I thought about suicide, I was clinically depressed,
I attempted suicide when I was 15 years old.
Narrator: Each week in Washington State,
an average of two young people die by suicide,
and another 17 suicide attempts result in hospitalization.
Keeping those chilling statistics in mind,
Heather Carter, OUTLoud program director,
knows that while these facts are disturbing, there is hope.
By educating students, parents, and faculty,
she is making a difference.
Heather Carter is a true Champion of Change.
Vicki Wagner: Well, Heather created the OUTLoud program.
She really grew that program from nothing.
She's tireless, she's fearless.
I mean, she will talk to anybody at any time about OUTLoud and
about the needs of this community.
But in particular with LGBTQ kids.
Representative Marko Liias: You know,
the reality is that for many of us is that we've got young
people in the LGBT community that are struggling,
struggling with depression, struggling with suicide,
struggling with the challenges of bullying in our schools,
and in our state they don't have enough voices.
They don't have people that are speaking up for them.
But then you find someone like Heather,
who is almost on her own creating this movement and
change and advocating for young people in the LGBT community,
making sure that young, marginalized gay and lesbian
teens have somebody that's out there fighting for them.
And also someone that's reaching out to them to give them that
hope, to give them that opportunity,
give them the tools they need to really cope with a tough
society right now.
And that's what I see.
I mean, Heather's really that face and that voice and that
presence and that champion for people that don't have a voice
in the process.
Heather Carter: So I was hired by the Youth Suicide
Prevention Program in 2007 to start an LGBT component of the
work that they do in Washington.
The trainings that I've developed and that I do with
OUTLoud in particular are part social justice and part mental
health support and education around suicide risks.
And the idea is that if people understand what LGBT are going
through and the risks that are in place,
they're way more apt to change their behaviors if they are
contributing to those risks, or support them in another way
because they realize that the possible outcomes are anxiety,
depression, suicide, and other high-risk behaviors.
And I just know that I've always wanted to be in the
helping field.
Whatever that, whatever that ends up being,
I just know that I don't ever want anyone else to feel the way
that I did when I was a teenager.
We should assume that youth today shouldn't have to go
through it and survive, right, because it's not about survival,
right, we want these youth to flourish and be proud of who
they are, no matter who that is.
Off-camera Voice: Heather Carter: Educator, mentor,
mother, LGBTQ suicide prevention advocate.
A true Champion of Change.
(end of video) (applause)
(video playing)
George Stewart: My name is George Stewart,
and I'm 80 years old.
I've been living in New York since 1964,
when I got out of the military.
When I went in the military I think that's the point I really
got a real warm feeling in the company of other men.
I didn't drink.
And, but like I said, being in a segregated outfit, we were,
we wanted, we were trained to be better than the average soldier.
Like if they shot at the top of their shoe,
we shot at the bottom as well.
You know, in the military I was in the legal office,
I was a court reporter.
For fun now, but at 80 years old I do things differently than I
did when I was much younger, when I first arrived in
New York.
Now I do a lot of -- (inaudible) reading,
I do a lot of volunteer work, which is why I'm here at SAGE,
and also do a lot of church work.
I sing in my choir at church.
But the older you get, you change.
I mean, I don't want to hang out in the bars any more like
I used to.
My body won't let me, to begin with.
So I have to face the fact that I'm a senior now.
And the gay community is not into seniors so much.
You know, you have to be young and all that stuff.
SAGE, to me, I was really surprised.
I came here thinking that I would get the same feeling that
I did with any other senior center.
I just, when I was asked to come here,
with my time -- (inaudible) and we got to talking about SAGE and
I said, well, when you come to Harlem,
I'll join your volunteers.
And I did.
It didn't take me long to realize that there was
a difference.
You all here seem to enjoy your work as much as we enjoy having
you work for us, you know.
And that makes a difference.
I felt a warmth.
There was a nice warmth.
To this day I still feel that.
I think it's more mental, the help that I get from SAGE,
and I think it's simply because I think it's kindness.
The staff seem to be very kind.
But it all seems to kind of work,
like you put a bridge together, everything fits.
What you do fits with what somebody else is doing,
but you're all working toward that same goal,
which is to try to have LGBT seniors live as comfortable a
life as possible.
It makes you want to do the best that you can because
you appreciate what they're asking you to do.
Here, like at SAGE, I'm working with people who care for
seniors, who are working to make seniors have a better life,
and that's where I fit in.
(end of video) (applause)
Gautam Raghavan: So I'd like to invite our first panel up
here: JJ, Heather, and George, along with my colleague Monique
Dorsainvil from the Office of Public Engagement,
who will help moderate our first panel.
Please come up.
(applause)
Monique Dorsainvil: Gautam, thank you so much
for that kind introduction.
To kick off our panel, I have a question that I'd like all three
of you to answer, starting with JJ.
With all of the challenges facing the LGBT community,
what inspires you to do the work that you do today?
JJ Kahle: Well, I have to say the most inspiring thing for me
as a teacher and as a person who works with youth are the youth.
They are our future.
They are my heroes.
I'd like to point out that the two students that were in the
video are here today, and I'm just very proud of them and all
of the other students, GLBT and Ally who are working,
who see absolutely that equality needs to be for everybody,
and who are undaunted, and who absolutely inspire each other
and those of us who are older than them to keep working
toward change.
Monique Dorsainvil: Thank you.
Please.
Heather Carter: So I think that just going in -- just like
in the video, going into the helping field,
which I knew from a very young age that that was where
I was going to go, kicking and screaming,
even if I didn't want to, that was the direction I was going.
Social justice, human rights has always been my motivation and
something that motivated me.
And one particular experience that I just had not long before
I came here, I think is a good example of the motivation,
my motivation.
I was doing a training for a school in South Seattle,
and it was Be the Change Day for youth.
And I was invited to do a speaking engagement by their Gay
Straight Alliance, and so I was doing a training on LGBT youth
suicide prevention and intervention for all the school,
and I was co-training with some of the Gay Straight Alliance
youth in that school.
And one of the particular youth in the training that was a
participant opened up and said that in the previous year he had
tried to kill himself, and that he had, midyear,
after he had tried to kill himself,
he had moved schools to this school because it was a better
school for him.
And that his family is absolutely not supportive of
his identity, and he has continued issues,
and that he continues to be unsupported.
And so after the training, I went up to ask him to stay
behind and talk to me, and I said, "Are you in therapy?
Is there some kind of support going on?"
And he said, "I am, it's not helping."
I said, "Let me talk to some people,
let me make sure that I can get the help that you need,
" and he said, "Can I hug you?"
And I said, "Absolutely."
I never met this boy before, right, and so I hugged him,
and gave him my contact information,
and said if you need anything else let's, you know,
make sure you contact me.
I had another session right after that so I didn't have a
lot of time for him, right, and this is unfortunately how it is,
I'm a trainer.
Right?
So he went to his next session and I was,
that was my last session, I was getting all my stuff together,
and right before I was leaving I get this tap on my shoulder.
And I turn around and he said, Heather -- sorry -- he says,
Heather -- sorry -- turned around, this boy,
and he just wraps his arms around me and just hugs me so
tight and he says, "Thank you."
And I said, "What for?"
And he just said, "I feel better."
And all I did was just, that's it, you know.
Just that little bit that I was able to give him.
Right?
Fast forward to Gay Pride and I was one of the Grand Marshals in
the Gay Pride this year, and I was driving in a convertible.
And in the parade, two of the girls that copresented with me,
ran up to the car, just, Heather, Heather,
and I hugged them and whatever, and I saw the boy.
And he's one of those, you know, teenage boys and he's kind of
aloof, and he's like, right, that, and I was like,
right here, right?
And he runs up to the car, that's all he needed.
He runs up to the car and I gave him a big hug and I said,
"How are you doing?"
And he looked at me right in the eye, right?
That's hard for a teenage boy sometimes, right?
And he looked me right in the eye and he said,
"I'm doing better."
And I said, "Are you getting the help that you need?"
And he's like, "I'm getting there."
That for me, that's the motivation for the work I do.
(applause)
Monique Dorsainvil: Thank you for sharing that.
George.
George Stewart: Well, my motivation was not quite as
powerful as that.
Heather Carter: Sorry.
(laughter)
George Stewart: But she just motivated me again.
(laughter)
Monique Dorsainvil: Me, too.
George Stewart: But I can tell you that my motivation came
when I started volunteering at SAGE.
To me -- and I think I told them that at my little session -- it
takes a certain kind of person, a special kind of person to be
concerned about seniors in general,
but to be concerned about LGBT seniors who have lived their
lives with as much trauma as I did as a teenage black man in
this country, so I can bring that to the seniors,
I know how they feel.
And they had to live their lives hard all of their lives.
And now that they're seniors they've lost their partners,
they've been disinherited by their families,
and it's been a tough life.
I didn't have it that tough because my mother protected me
from that.
And so by the time I got of age to realize how homophobic so
many people can be and how hurtful they can be,
I was in the military, and so I was shielded from that again.
But speaking of the military, the thing that got me --
actually it was funny to me, when they had all this big deal
about "Don't Ask, Don't Tell," I was in the military and I was in
a segregated outfit and we had gays in the military.
In fact I'll tell this story to the day I die.
My platoon corporal was a flaming sissy in those days.
(laughter) And when he told us to fall out for reveille,
he would say, "Okay, girls, make Mother look good this morning."
(laughter and applause) So, and what we did was we made
Mother look good.
(laughter) But we didn't think about it as anything derogatory
or -- that's who he was.
He was, well, we called them in those days sissies.
So a sissy.
But we didn't care as long as he was shooting in the same
direction as we were.
(laughter) That's all that mattered.
So when I hear all this thing about "Don't Ask, Don't Tell,
" I was confused.
But now that it's happened, I'm glad,
because they were always there, all we're doing is acknowledging
the fact that they're there, and they're doing a good job.
So we used to say, when you digging a foxhole you don't care
who jumps in there with you, just let's make sure
they're safe.
And we had one rule.
Sissies and heterosexuals alike, you do not bring discredit upon
the uniform or your country.
What you do on your own time and be discreet about it is
up to you.
And I carry that to this day.
I don't want to do anything.
So I adapted, my way of surviving this is I look at
everybody as a human being.
When we cut, all of us cut, we bleed red, we bleed red.
I don't see anybody with blue blood or white blood or
black blood.
We're all human beings.
And once we get to realize that, and it takes all of us to make
this country move forward, the better off we'll be.
But my inspiration came volunteering at SAGE,
It's really an honor and a pleasure to share the stage with
realizing that SAGE is an organization for LGBT seniors.
All seniors need help, but I think LGBT seniors
need more help.
And the fact that some of them have been isolated for so long,
it's hard to bring them out, you know,
they're just used to being kept separate.
We're working on it and we've got all kinds of organizations
and programs that's going to do that.
It's growing, I've watched it grow,
and I really think that SAGE has added a few more years to my
life, because they treat, we're all human beings at SAGE,
you know, just like I wanted to be.
I want everybody -- we've got gays working together and
heterosexuals working together, and you can't
tell the difference.
(laughter) And that's what I like about SAGE.
Monique Dorsainvil: You're doing incredible work.
(applause) JJ.
Too often we see LGBT youth living in isolation.
What are some steps that teachers can take to make sure
that a student is supported and able to become,
as you mentioned in your video, his or her best self?
JJ Kahle: That's a great question, and teachers,
I can say being a teacher, there are still many states where we
can be fired if we are GLBT.
And so teachers have to be careful,
and they have to look at the policies and the culture of the
school that they're working in, the community that they're
working in.
And -- but regardless, regardless of how strict that
might be or how closeted they feel they might have to live,
there are still indications that you can give to students that
can help make that isolation less, less a factor,
at least in every moment of their day at school.
Borrowing from both Heather and George, as George said,
there were always gays in the military,
there's always been gay kids at school.
It's not a recent thing.
It's not that all of a sudden we have more gay people than we've
had in the past.
We've always been there.
We've always had GLBT youth amongst us.
Sometimes I speak to schools and they say, well,
we don't have any gay kids in our school,
so we don't need to do anything.
If that's what you think, you need to take a good,
hard look at your community.
And Heather said in her video, it's not about survival,
it shouldn't just be about surviving,
it should be about thriving.
And what teachers can do is take advantage of some great
organizations that are there to offer support in curriculum
and training.
GLSEN is a great organization that helps, amongst many things,
the idea of starting and sustaining a GSA,
a Gay Straight Alliance, or whatever that organization
is called.
Recently we've been talking a lot about what elementary school
teachers can do.
I think for a long time people just assumed that GLBT stuff was
emerging sexuality of youth in middle school and high school.
And I just want to also talk about the issue of transgender
and gender, nonconforming youth, and how that starts very young.
And elementary school teachers can very much benefit from
training and enlightenment and learning how to deal with
children in a way that doesn't, quote, unquote,
gender their school experience to the point where they
feel isolated.
Can you imagine feeling that at age five, age four,
much less being a teenager.
So there are many things that teachers can do.
Starting a GSA is a huge indicator of cultural health
in a school.
The Family Acceptance Project just issued a great body of
research just a couple of years ago, in 2009,
that indicates that, guess what, if students,
if children feel accepted, the risk factors that are
associated with GLBT youth decline dramatically.
That seems like common sense.
But we have now the statistics available to know that that's
what we as schools must do.
In Minnesota we've had a debate, and you might have heard about
it, the Anoka-Hennipen School District had a neutrality
clause, which basically hamstringed many teachers into
thinking that they couldn't respond if the child was being
bullied because of their *** orientation or gender identity.
And recently a lawsuit was settled that demanded that
schools do more than just be neutral.
Neutrality does not get us anywhere.
And we need to be proactive in supporting our GLBT youth.
They, amongst all the youth that we have,
all of our kids are precious resources.
They are the future of our country.
And if they're only surviving, and they're barely getting by
and they're isolated, we are not fully enjoying the benefit of
our resources, which are our youth.
And if they're empowered and vested,
and they're best athletes, best academics and best arts,
then we as a country, we as a school,
are going to do better as a result.
And so just a message to all my fellow teachers that are out
there: From the smallest indication of your support for
your children to starting a GSA, to becoming a school that has
gender neutral bathrooms, that has inclusive curriculum,
that talks about GLBT people as being part and parcel of all of
our lives, not just *** orientation,
but there are writers, artists, engineers, mathematicians,
just alongside everybody else to fully humanize that educational
experience, that's what we need to do to make kids feel safe and
welcome in schools.
(applause)
Monique Dorsainvil: Those were really useful and concrete
steps that teachers can take.
Thank you.
George.
In your video, you talked about your experiences serving in the
military during segregation, and you talked about the
inter-generation gap that exists in the LGBT movement.
Can you talk about the benefit of bridging those gaps and ways
that you've seen it done effectively in social movements
over time?
George Stewart: Bridging the gap.
Well, yeah, I think with me it all started in the military when
they integrated the military.
And the way they did it was we just woke up one morning and
these great big two-ton trucks, or two-by-fours, or whatever,
I forget what they called them, all these whites GIs started
Those videos were incredibly powerful and honest.
coming in and disembarking.
What's going on here?
Then they called the names, you know,
all the following men jump on this truck, you know,
and our guys were jumping on the truck.
They were integrating.
They didn't ask us, they just did it.
And it was quite an experience, because we were overpolite to
each other, you know, the white guys would open the door for us.
Oh, no, after you.
(laughter) And, but, you know, the best way to get to -- I'm
going to tell this little story.
I was stationed over in Japan, and there was this white guy,
kid came over, freckle face, blonde kid, from Tennessee.
He was my assistant.
I was a staff sergeant, and he was assigned to work with me.
I asked him to, I said kid, I said, kid,
I want you to do so-and-so-and-so.
And he said, Ah, I'm not going to do that.
I'm looking at him now, say you've got be out of your mind.
(laughter)
I said, why?
And you know what he said to me?
I am not used to taking orders from ***.
So now, my first thing was insubordination,
send him to court-martial or Article 15.
But I thought about it.
And I think this is the spiritual side of me.
I said, this guy don't realize what he's saying.
That's all he knows.
He's been hearing that all his life and everything.
So I asked him.
I said, Kim, come sit down and talk with me.
Which would hurt your family more,
you being court-martialed for insubordination to a *** or
doing what I ask you to do and not get court-martialed?
What you think your family would appreciate more?
Don't you think you should just go ahead and do what I
ask you to do?
He said, okay, sergeant.
But to make a long story short, after about a year and a half,
I was going back to the states.
Charles Kim was at my farewell party.
I'm drinking this beer.
He's sitting next to me.
I drink half of the bottle of beer.
He snatches it and finishes it, sits it down in front of me.
Have I grown?
I said, I think you have.
(laughter) But it tells a big story.
First, I'm proud of myself that I didn't get all hostile and
court-martial him because I think I taught him a lesson.
And then he wanted to give me his address so I could
come visit.
I said no, no, no.
(laughter) Thank you very much.
But you see, I think that this is a man who's in Tennessee now
-- because he was much younger than me.
And when he hears derogatory remarks,
he has second thoughts about it.
He knows that it's not all true, because I'm convinced of that.
And he's probably teaching other people.
This is the way I believe we have to handle this.
We can't fly off the handle too much.
So I was proud of him and I was proud of myself,
at the way I handled that.
So that's the way we have to do this.
You know, this homophobia in this country is something that's
going to take years to overcome.
But the people like Heather and the people sitting up here and
people out there, we're learning and we're making strides.
I didn't even know I was gay, I guess,
because I was shielded in the military.
We was just men doing our thing.
But when I got outside, out of the military,
I realized there was a difference between heterosexual
men and gay men.
They didn't like us very well.
And it was easy for us, for me to be guy because I
like the opera.
I like listening to classical music.
I go to church.
I sing on my choir.
All of those are gay things.
And then when I started having trouble with my girlfriends
because of this, I said well, I got to make a choice.
I'm not going to give up my Christianity just to get along
with them.
And I'm sure going to continue to love the opera.
And I realized that my gay buddies liked the opera too.
They liked to go to church and sing on the choir.
I said, that's where I belong, that's where I fit in.
And when they hear this video or see it, inside of it,
they're going to say, I told you so.
(Laughter)
Monique Dorsainvil: Full circle.
George Stewart: But it's not going to bother me, you know.
At my age, nothing bothers me too much anymore.
So we'll get there.
And again, our seniors are getting great help from
our organization.
And they're helping me.
I'm a senior too.
So I'm helping myself when I help SAGE.
Monique Dorsainvil: Thank you so much.
(applause) Heather, in your video,
you touched upon a very important intersection,
the intersection of social justice and mental health.
Can you tell us a little bit about the role that mental
health plays in the work that you do today?
So I have my dream job right now.
So before I went to graduate school,
I worked in mental health and I got tired of the bureaucracy.
And the mental health clients that I worked with I felt were
not even just secondary.
I felt they were way low on the list of priorities.
And so I went to graduate school and said,
I'm going to work in social justice, this is my heart,
my passion.
It has always been my passion.
And so when I finished graduate school, this position,
I applied for this position thinking there's no way I'm
going to get this.
And I did.
And I was like wow, I get to start my own program.
And it's one part social justice and one part mental health.
And the executive director at the time who was the founding
executive director of the suicide prevention program said,
um, social justice and mental health.
Are you a suicide prevention program.
We do training.
I'm not really seeing where that goes together.
And I was like, you can't separate the two for LGBT youth.
And I think actually my perspective is you can't
separate the two for mental health clients at all.
So many people that suffer from mental health,
it is about social justice for them and the lack of
social justice.
When I worked in mental health -- I worked in crisis
mental health.
And I saw clients that I felt so often were at the stage in
crisis that they were at because of the lack of social justice
for them and for the lack of understanding that if -- okay.
So i'm going to interrupt myself because cellphones have been a
wonderful thing for people that hear voices.
They have.
Especially bluetooth and the things that are in your ears
because before, when I worked in crisis they didn't have those.
So when people talked to themselves and had voices,
they would stand out a lot more now.
So I laugh.
I don't have the bluetooth and all that.
I'm just not a tech savvy person.
So I laugh now when I see people talking to themselves whereas
before I wouldn't.
Because now I'm like -- the first thing is oh, right.
And then I'm like, wait a second,
they're just talking on their cell phone.
And I laugh at myself because of my reaction.
Because at first I think I'm back in crisis and I'm like oh,
this person -- you know.
And then I remember no, no, they're just talking on a
bluetooth or whatever.
So anyway, you can't separate social justice
and mental health.
So now I have this platform where I get the opportunity to
educate people about the fact that you can't.
And for me, I truly believe for LGBT youth that it is about the
lack of social justice and the lack of understanding and the
lack of social support for LGBT youth.
And first and foremost, the recognition that they exist
and that they are youth just like any other youth.
And for their mental health needs,
they have the same risk factors as all the other youth and then
a whole other set of risk factors or just the higher
occurrence of the same risk factors as the other youth.
And so for me, when she told me that was the question she was
asking me, I was like oh, that's so easy.
Because you get nervous when you get this.
And I was like, that's why I do this work.
And I truly do believe I have my dream job.
And the work that I do is amazing.
Not my job but the work that's outs there and the need of the
work is great.
Monique Dorsainvil: Thanks so much.
(applause) So now we have a few moments left.
And we're going to turn it over to the audience.
So if you have questions, please just state your name,
your affiliation, and where you're from.
And let's see what you've got.
Any takers?
Right here.
Chloe Schwenke: My name is Chloe Schwenke.
I'm with the U.S.
Agency for International Developments.
And I'm in charge of our LGBT policy work overseas.
And I just wanted to comment more than ask a question and put
it in your minds, in all of our minds,
how critically important what you're doing is as a model for
people overseas.
You know, we often think that our world stops at our border.
But we're being looked at all the time,
particularly in the LGBT world.
I really commend the work that you're doing.
And I encourage you to get the message out,
to let people know that this is going on in this country.
It may seem like we still have so far to go.
But compared to what's happening in Africa,
in the Caribbean and other places, we're a light.
So thank you very much for your work.
(applause)
Heather Carter: Thank you.
Monique Dorsainvil: Thank you, Chloe.
(applause) To your right here.
Jesse Garcia: Good morning.
My name is Jesse Garcia, and I work for the Administration for
Children and Families at HHS.
And I just reconnected with a college friend.
She's very happy that we got on the phone.
And she says, I have a 15 year old daughter that's coming out.
I need you to talk to her.
I'm going to have this conversation on Sunday.
And she's from a little town in Texas.
So what three things should I tell this young girl who's
biracial, living in a small rural town in Texas about being
15 and possibly gay.
JJ Khale: Just nod.
You said that it was her mom that called you?
Jesse Garcia: We reconnected and she says, by the way,
I'm so happy I got to get you on the phone because I need
you to help me.
JJ Khale: So this girl has the support of her mother?
Jesse Garcia: Yes.
JJ Khale: Okay.
Well that's huge.
Jesse Garcia: Yes.
JJ Khale: Because when young people come out -- and I'll open
this up to you all to answer as well -- one of the first things
is their safety.
How safe are you, and what kind of an environment of support do
you have?
And they start talking about signs and indications that they
have from their parents, from their siblings,
from their school community, and other important communities
that they engage with.
The level of safety and support they feel.
So they might -- and you might ask them who is it that you can
talk to face to face?
Is there someone that you can -- have you connected with someone?
Do you have friends that are GLBT that you know?
And ask them for example, at school, is there a GSA,
have you been involved with that?
Is that something that you could be involved with?
But the fact that this child's parents support her,
if you're GLBT, you know how important that is.
That is so huge for this child and will probably make just a
tremendous difference in how she navigates the coming out process
for herself.
Having that piece in place -- as George said,
if you've got your mother and your father behind you,
if you've got your parents behind you,
it makes things a whole lot easier.
So that would be one thing that I would say.
Heather Carter: I second that.
The other thing is, as adults, we always want to provide all
the answers.
She's got the support of her mother.
Fantastic.
That's, like she said, so important.
The other thing I would say is, what do you need from me?
And you're way.
So what do you need from your mom,
what is it that's lacking in your life that you need?
What support do you need?
What can we help you with?
And we often forget to do that as adults with youth,
to ask them, right?
She needs to be an integral and active part of this process.
Or he -- I think it was a she.
She needs to be an active part of this process.
This should not be done to her or for her.
She should be a part of that.
So just strongly encourage her mother to remember that.
Because I've got children and I want to protect them and do
everything for them.
But that's actually not to their benefit.
So she should be definitely a part of the conversation.
And fantastic.
I think that was just like one of those perfect moments kinds
of things.
So I'm glad you're a part of that.
George Stewart: I just wanted to say one thing.
I find the young people approaching people my age.
And they want to know several things.
They want to know how did you survive being black in America
at your age.
And now they want to know about being gay, you know.
And I said, first thing you have to do is love yourself.
That's the big thing.
No matter what people call you.
My mother told me a long time ago, she said, son,
it's not what people call you, it's what you answer to.
And I took that with me.
I mean, I've been called all kinds of names.
And first it used to hurt.
But I heard my mother say, it's not what they call you.
You're going to answer to that?
No.
And I'm going to say something that may not be too true.
I think President Obama has learned that.
He's been called a lot of things.
But he answers to Mr. President.
(applause)
Monique Dorsainvil: We have time for one last question.
Right here in the front.
Aleksa Manila: Good morning, everyone.
I'm Aleksa Manila, and I'm also a counselor at Seattle
Counseling Service.
First, congratulations to all of you for being recognized and
also being role models and inspirations to the youth,
the elders, and fellow advocates.
My question is, as Champions of Change,
what are your words of wisdom to folks, to people,
especially LGBTQ people who remain silent?
And I don't mean folks necessarily that are not out
of the closet.
And i'm certainly not forcing people to come out.
But for the silent heroes who could be saying something or
doing something, who have seen Prop 8 in California lose -- and
in Washington state we're trying to make sure and ensure that
Referendum 74 passes.
But what are your words of wisdom to every person that
still has a voice and just aren't saying or doing as much
as they could?
JJ Khale: Thanks for that question.
I'll start just by saying in Minnesota we're also looking at
an amendment on our ballot.
It's an anti-marriage equality amendment.
And we have a large organization called Minnesotan's United for
All Families that's working hard to fight against this amendment.
And in a state like Minnesota where we have a metro area,
basically one metro area, some smaller kind of medium sized
towns and a lot of rural area, the most important thing,
the most important way to win hearts and minds and votes in
support of marriage equality is by telling your story.
And it's not -- it's those conversations that neighbors
have with neighbors, that friends have with friends.
And if you've never spoken to somebody about your gay niece or
nephew or about your relative or friend who's GLBT or yourself,
that can be a scary thing.
In the Midwest especially, that might be something that people
feel reserved about.
But that telling your story and putting flesh to word is the
most critical thing.
What we've found, statistically, is that if a voter knows one
GLBT person, they just know them and can name them,
the likelihood that they will vote for equality is
exponentially higher.
And so the stakes are high.
GLBT people in all areas need to talk about their stories
if they can.
Obviously, there's a comfort level that everybody has
to deal with.
But it's incredibly important.
It's what wins hearts and minds.
And as people come out in all walks of life,
we're not the caricature of gay people that like my parents
might have had.
When I came out, there were very few examples that my mom could
talk about.
She just didn't know very many gay people.
I think the more visible we are the less -- we demystify what
gay people are and we just normalize it as much as we can
so that people see it's just kind of like being left-handed
or any other human attribute that can occur in that we
deserve equal rights and justice under the law just like
everybody else.
So I think that's very important.
Monique Dorsainvil: You want to add?
George Stewart: I don't know.
We do have a lot of people who are ashamed of being gay.
And that's because society is so homophobic.
They just don't want to fight the battle.
But we've got guys that come to the agency who won't give you
the right address because they don't want that mail coming into
their mailbox.
They just haven't reached our level yet,
and we just have to keep after them.
One of my neighbors saw me on TV and she said, oh George,
I saw you on TV, I didn't know you were gay.
I said, you never asked me.
And she said, well, good luck to you.
But she still speaks to me on the elevator.
Now she knows something different about me.
But from what I can tell, she hasn't changed.
But we have to keep -- you know, our churches are sometimes our
worst enemy because they got us thinking that the only people
going to hell are gay people.
And that's not true.
Our churches need to do more to talk about LGBT in
a positive manner.
We got too many people sitting in church that think
that homosexuality, you're just doomed to hell,
which is not true.
I read my Bible too, and it doesn't say anything about that.
Heather Carter: Thank you.
George Stewart: But we'll learn.
Monique Dorsainvil: Heather, do you want to add?
Heather Carter: This one hits really close to home, Aleksa.
I'm really happy you asked that.
So I think back -- so that same boy,
obviously he's really affected me.
He asked me to give him advice for the future.
And I said, you know, the one thing that I would change in my
life -- I'm not a person that would change my life.
But the one thing I would like to be able to do is to go back
to my 16 year old self and say, it will be okay, right.
I didn't come out until I was 25 years old.
I had a lot of internal homophobia.
I touched on it a little bit at the beginning of my video.
I was so scared of what my parents would think.
I'll tell you, I was positive my dad would never talk to me again
when I came out to him.
And he accepted me 100% and has accepted me from the day that I
came out to him through a letter because I couldn't face
him in person.
So it was very difficult for me.
It took me living in Asia, away from everyone, to come out.
So I'm not speaking from a very safe place where I was just like
oh, it's so easy to come out and it's so easy to do this.
And look at where I am now, right.
It has taken me, step by step, to even today,
to come to terms with who I am and overcome all the issues that
I had to overcome.
And it's made me a better person.
The more and more I talk about it and the more and more I
confront my internal issues and the external issues in society.
So I'm not saying that everybody has to be where I am right here,
because we can't be.
Literally not everyone can be here.
But I believe we truly should all do the best we can with
where we're at.
And only we can be the judges of what that is.
So I truly do not believe we can judge others.
Anderson Cooper, I think, is a good example.
I was pretty sure he was gay.
And I think everybody in the room was pretty sure he was gay.
And so people would be like, he needs to come out,
he's a role model.
And I was like, you know, it would be good if he came out.
It's true.
But he needs to travel his own path.
But it is a positive thing that he came out.
It is.
But for anyone to tell anyone else what path to travel,
I don't think is a positive thing.
So my answer is, we all need to do the best we can.
And whatever that is, we make that decision.
Monique Dorsainvil: Thank you so much to all three of you for
sharing your incredible stories and just giving us a glimpse
into the incredible work that you do.
On that note, this is the end of our first panel.
Please join me in thanking our Champions of Change.
Heather Carter: I just want to really quickly recognize two
people in the room, Shaun Knittel and Dru Dinero.
They were the people that made the video that I was in.
Shaun could easily be right here right now.
Aleksa Manila should be here right now.
The two of them should be in this position where I'm at.
They're huge advocates in the Seattle community and beyond for
LGBT issues.
And I just want to say thank you, Shuan.
It was all his idea.
Thank you very much.
And thank you for all the work that you guys do.
(applause)
Thank you guys so much.
Gautam Raghavan: All right.
We are now -- you know, for the Redwood String ensemble,
we decided that rather than have you watch a video of them
performing we would just ask them to perform for you.
So it was quite a feat.
Their instruments got sniffed by the dogs.
But they are here to perform for you.
And they'll be performing the piece from their video entry
which is Adagio for Strings by Samuel Barber.
Let's just give them a few minutes to set up and
perform for you.
(applause)
As they're setting up, I just thought I would say a few words.
McKenzie Bauer: Hello, everyone.
First of all, thank you so much for allowing us this opportunity
to play for you.
We're all so young.
And all of these people are just so incredible to us.
And we feel very honored and humbled to be here and be a part
of all of this.
My name is McKenzie Bauer and I am an LGBTQ ally and a member of
the Redwood String Ensemble.
Our ensemble formed two years ago at Oberlin Conservatory in
Oberlin, Ohio.
We came to Oberlin as individuals from Illinois,
Idaho, Texas, and Minnesota.
While playing together, we discovered our similar
love and passion for expression through music.
We consist of openly gay women and LGBT allies.
However, these labels have never influenced our opinions of each
other as people or as musicians.
Our wants to inspire people through the acknowledgment and
acceptance of our differences comes from the raw and intimate
connection we share through our music.
We would like to take this opportunity to dedicate this
performance of the Adagio For Strings by Samuel Barber,
himself a gay American composer, to all of the members of the
LGBTQ community, specifically to those loved ones we have lost
due to discrimination and prejudice,
as well as to others who have experienced similar hardship.
We use our art as a way to express emotions that are not
able to be spoken.
And we firmly believe music to be the ultimate and universal
language for all people.
Please join us as we perform this piece in taking a moment of
musical silence to honor those who have been affected by the
discrimination, hate, and prejudice that surrounds the
LGBTQ community.
♪♪
(applause)
Audience member: Bravo!
(applause)
Gautam Raghavan: Thank you all so much for
your wonderful performance.
We are now going to move on to the second panel.
So please join me in giving them another round of applause.
(applause) So if you'll just hold tight for just one minute.
We are going to show you the second round of videos,
the last two videos, and then bring that panel up.
(Video playing)
Glennda Teston: (no audio) across the country.
Kendall Clawson: It's the center of our center.
David Kilmnick: Until I found Centerlink I felt alone.
♪♪
Terry Stone: We make sure that centers across the country
and actually across the world have strong sustainable
foundations so that they are able to do the work that they
need to do for the local community, day in and day out.
Lorri Jean: Centerlink is one of the places where I find
community as an executive director and CEO of a
community center.
It's an organization that I was very privileged to co-found in
1994 with four other leaders of LGBT community centers.
We realized that there needed to be an organization that existed
just to help strengthen and sustain the LGBT community
center network.
Terry Stone: Now we provide support for community centers,
the 200 that exist all over the world, actually,
and help their boards, their staff,
their volunteers to be better at what they do every day.
We are actually housed in the Pride Center at Equality Park in
Fort Lauderdale, Florida.
And we have three offices there.
And on a typical day, we answer 10 to 15 telephone calls from
individuals across the country who need assistance,
who need resources or sometimes just need someone to talk to
about how to create a community center in their own location.
Paul Hyman: We have the ability to walk down the hall
and bounce ideas off of Terry and his staff.
I think it gives the Centerlink staff the opportunity to
experience firsthand each and every day the impact of their
work as well.
Kendall Clawson: I could call Centerlink and if they didn't
have it they knew where to get it.
So it's like having your own little gay google,
if you will -- (laughter) -- you know,
where you can call Centerlink and say, hey,
has anybody ever done X.
And if they don't know, they can make a call to the
over 200 centers and somebody out there has some knowledge
base about that.
So the resources alone are literally life saving.
Glennda Testone: The network that Centerlink provides just
bolsters everything we do at this center and we are able to
as one of the older, bigger centers be a mentor
for up and coming centers.
David Kilmnick: Centerlink is really to me the most important
national organization our LGBT community can have.
♪♪ (end of video) (applause)
(video playing)
Speaker: I come from a military family.
Both my mother and my father served until retirement.
I always knew that I would be serving my country.
Speaker: And I served because I recognized the tremendous
amount of pride involved in serving my country.
Speaker: I wanted to save people's lives and jump
out of helicopters.
Speaker: I was looking for adventure and to
serve my country proudly.
Speaker: Both my grandmother and my grandfather served
in the military.
My father served in the military.
Speaker: I saw my friend in unform and she inspired me.
I knew at that point that I wanted to do something greater
than myself.
I wanted to serve.
Speaker: Our driver jumped in the truck, we backed up,
and just as we moved, we saw mortar fall exactly
where we were.
(indicating noise) As this was happening I could see through
the truck window.
The sergeant was physically grabbing soldiers and putting
them in the armored trucks for their safety.
Speaker: I felt a tremendous amount of pride training
my junior sailors to grow and to transform,
to be the best sailors that they could be so that they could make
a difference in the world, just like I did.
Speaker: I assisted with the launch and the recovery
of aircraft on this ship.
Speaker: My platoon and I made sure that our soldiers were
ready to fight at a moment's notice working around the clock
to get the mission done.
Speaker: One of the best aspects about being an aviation
search and rescue swimmer was that I got to bring people home
to their families that never thought that they were going to
make it home again.
Speaker: While in Iraq we were mortared a lot,
sometimes once, twice, three times a day.
There was one day in particular that I'll never forget.
I was blown up.
I thought I had shrapnel stuck in my body, but I didn't,
I was okay.
And actually a sense of peace came over me that day realizing
that I wasn't supposed to die that day, I had more to do.
Speaker: I love.
Speaker: I challenge myself.
Speaker: I serve.
Speaker: I bleed red, white, and blue.
Speaker: I'm a survivor.
Speaker: I have faith.
Speaker: Just like you.
Speaker: Just like you.
Speaker: Just like you.
Speaker: Just like you.
Speaker: Just like you.
Speaker: I am just like you.
♪♪ (end of video) (applause)
Speaker: So I would like to invite our second panel up here.
Gautam Raghavan: All right, so,
we are going to just do a couple of quick questions up here,
but please, start thinking of your own questions,
if you have them.
So I thought it would be great to start with each of
us introducing ourselves.
So, Terry, do you want to kick it off.
Terry Stone: Sure.
I'm Terry Stone.
I am the executive director of Centerlink,
the community of LGBT centers.
We are in Fort Lauderdale, Florida, as you heard.
I've been working in the LGBT community.
Sometimes I tell folks I'm gay for pay for the last 23 years.
(applause) It's been a great life for me.
And I love what I do.
And I'm lucky to work with LGBT centers across the country and
actually in some foreign countries right now.
Gautam Raghavan: Excellent.
David Kilmnick: Good morning.
My name is David Kilmnick and I'm the co-chair of the board of
Centerlink, and very proud to have Terry Stone as our leader
and executive director.
And while I'm not doing board duties,
I'm also the chief executive officer of the Long Island GLBT
services network which is an association of nonprofit
organizations, including Long Island Gay and Lesbian Youth,
also known as LIGALY, Long Island GLBT Community Center,
SAGE, Long Island, East End Gay Organization and Equality
Long Island.
Gautam Raghavan: Great.
Kristen.
Kristen Kavanaugh: Good morning,
my name is Kristen Kavanaugh, and I'm the executive director
of the military acceptance project.
We started a year ago out of the effort of Southern California as
part of a student project for graduate social work students.
Myself, I served in the marine corps for five years.
I was a captain when I got out.
And I served under the Don't ask,
Don't tell" policy during that time.
Adam Christ: Hello, my name is Adam Christ,
I am a navy veteran and I served for six years also under the
Don't ask, don't tell" policy.
And it was that experience of serving in silence that prompted
me to become involved with the military acceptance project.
Gautam Raghavan: So Kristen and Adam,
I wanted to start with you, and because I know we just watched
your video, and "just like you" was a refrain throughout it.
So I wanted you to tell us a little bit about the campaign
that you're doing around that.
Kristen Kavanaugh: It started -- we. had a conversation with
Eric Alva who is a former sergeant in the United States
marine corps.
I don't know if anybody is aware of Eric,
but he was the first service member wounded in Iraqi freedom,
also happens to be a gay man.
We interviewed him when we first started our project and our
communication's director asked him what would you say to
individuals if you could tell them something about gay and
lesbian service members?
He would say I would tell them that I'm just like you.
And that really resonated with us, because it's the truth.
We are no different than anyone else who has stepped up to serve
their country.
And so we started the campaign around that.
Just to let service members know that we've been out there
as Adam will tell you and have done amazing things and are no
different than anybody else.
And we want to make that connection.
And I think as JJ said in the first panel,
really put a face to the stories and the experience of gay and
lesbian service members.
Gautam Raghavan: And if I could ask the question
for both of you, we are coming up on you know,
just about a year after the full and final repeal of "Don't ask,
don't tell," and you guys -- are you both in San Diego?
Kristen Kavanaugh: Uh-huh.
Adam Christ: Uh-huh.
Gautam Raghavan: Which is obviously a huge military town.
How have things changed on the ground for you?
How have the lives of the vets and the active duty folks you're
working with changed?
Adam Christ: Well, you know, I was just telling
someone earlier that San Diego Pride is this weekend.
And last year they had the first contingent of
military personnel.
Even though "Don't ask, don't tell" was still in place they
marched in just plain clothes.
But this year they actually get to March in uniform down
the parade road.
It will be the first pride parade in the country that --
(applause) -- it's things have changed tremendously and they
continue to change at a rapid pace.
Gautam Raghavan: That's terrific.
Terry and David -- I think you can provide sort of a national
perspective and also the perspective of someone who is
working and running a GLBT center.
What is, in your opinion, the number one challenge or issue
that your centers face on a day-to-day basis?
Terry Stone: I think it's the struggle to make sure that you
continue to provide the relevant services that are constantly
changing for your community.
I mean, funding is always one of those things that's difficult
for people, but I think it's making sure that whatever you're
doing in those doors every day, is something that the folks
really need.
It's reaching out to your community,
making sure that you're working with seniors,
just like George talked about, making sure that the youth have
a place to come.
And then also finding that place in the middle for new families,
for folks with children, for you know,
the broad spectrum of what our community has become.
Some of our centers are doing programs for veterans and
saying, you know, we need to find a place to welcome them in,
make them part of the rich history that we provide here.
So, I think it's making sure that we are relevant every day,
day after day, making sure that everyone has what they need when
they walk in the door.
Gautam Raghavan: And David, can you speak to specifically,
you know, some of the issues you face in Long Island and whether
they are unique to the area or to running your
community center.
David Kilmnick: Sure, sure.
I want to echo what Terry said is that, you know,
basically community centers are the front line for the LGBT
community where we are providing health services,
we are out in the schools helping to start GSA's,
and maintain GSA's.
We are providing senior services.
We're not only providing the important health and human
services, but we are also doing a lot of community organizing.
So, if a policy issue around marriage comes up,
either meetings are going to be held at the Center or the Center
is going to be the one organizing the efforts to
fight for that equality.
So the Center really has to be, you know -- although we always
hear you can't be everything to everyone,
the Center has to be everything to everyone.
And it makes it a challenge, particularly on Long Island,
Long Island is very long.
So, you have -- I guess that's why they named it Long Island --
(laughter) -- and so, you know, you have Long Island which is
120 miles long in length, and has over close to 3 million
people who live on Long Island with a very poor public
transportation infrastructure.
So the challenge at home on Long Island is that we can't have one
community center, we have -- we have two right now and we are
planning to have a third so that we can make sure that no matter
where you live on Long Island you're less than one hour from a
community center.
And why that's so important is because that is where community
is built, that's where we make our community healthier.
That's where we organize.
And so, some of the, you know, being a suburban center and of
course, being close to New York City,
and sometimes people think that we are New York City and
we are not, it's a totally different landscape, you know,
being in a suburb makes it a little bit more
challenging also.
Gautam Raghavan: So, Kristen, I -- if I recall correctly,
MAP was largely started by social workers, correct?
Kristen Kavanaugh: Correct.
Gautam Raghavan: How does that inform the kind of work
you're doing, your approach.
Obviously, there are a number of organizations that work with gay
and lesbian service members, vets, military families.
I'm just curious, how does that change the way you do business?
Kristen Kavanaugh: Heather talked about the intersection
between mental health and social justice, and we believe in that.
Those two go hand in hand.
And so as social workers, we are taking a look at the
issues for LGBT service members and veterans from a
holistic perspective.
How can we support service members mentally, physically,
and then in their everyday lives.
So we definitely look at their intersection and that's
what social work is.
A lot of people misunderstand our profession and so we are out
educating about, social workers really getting out and taking a
look at the mental health.
Serving under "Don't ask, don't tell" has been traumatic
for a lot of people.
And, if you're looking at treating trauma,
it doesn't matter if it was, you know, we call it big "T" trauma,
you're out in combat, something happens like that,
or little "T" trauma, like going to work every day
and lying about how you are.
All of those things build up and all of those things have mental
health implications.
And so we want to be sure to address the mental health side
as well as the social support side.
Gautam Raghavan: Sure.
Adam, did you want to add anything?
Adam Christ: No, that's really -- (laughter) --
Gautam Raghavan: So, I have a couple more questions,
but folks feel free to jump in at some point.
One question I think a lot of folks here have for all four of
you is what can they do?
You know, we have a lot of incredible leaders in this
audience and watching live right now,
and I think they'd be curious to know what can they do either to
support a local community center,
what can they do to support gay and lesbian vets,
or service members, and just would welcome
your thoughts on that.
Terry Stone: Well, I think it's becoming involved.
And I'll piggyback that, I think it was Jessie that
was asking the question about how to help his friend.
The way you help your community, you help us,
you help community centers is you get them to be involved and
you get them to reach out.
One of the best things that we do and I think one of the things
that has the biggest impact is we have a rich resource of
centers, individuals, organizations,
both our community centers and our national partners that we
work with all the time.
So when someone calls Centerlink and says,
I have someone that's coming out, I don't know what to do,
where do I go, I can tell you in 10 to 15 minutes we can find a
resource for them, we can usually find an individual,
we can call PFLAG, we can do so many different things.
And what we want our partners to do and what we want the
community to do is just become part of what we are,
become involved, volunteer, engage.
Give your time, give your resources,
because that's the only way we are going to make this work.
It's all of us working together and pulling together and using
each other to just make a better community.
David Kilmnick: I'm always going to want
to echo what you say.
Terry Stone: Good, that's what you're supposed to do.
David Kilmnick: I'm a good board chair,
right, yeah, co-chair.
I'd like to give a shout-out for our other co-chair,
Lorraine from Metro Centers and Tampa-St.
Pete.
(applause) So, you know, but I do think, oh,
so that -- and the question was asked for the first panel also,
you know, what can people do, what should people do,
perhaps those that are silent, or that we don't see, visible.
And, so, you know for -- volunteer certainly,
volunteer in whatever capacity that you can.
Give, give back.
You know, I grew up, besides being gay, I'm also Jewish.
And I know, you know, growing up as a young Jewish kid, you know,
part of our culture was giving something called tsedakah is
which was to always give -- we would -- a little can was passed
around, I mean not like a coffee can or anything,
it was this fancy can.
And so this can was passed around and we would put in
whatever we had, a penny, a quarter,
a dollar so that we knew we were giving back to something greater
than what we were getting where we were.
And I think we kind of need to instill that culture in our
young people and also throughout the life.
So I say volunteer and give, give whatever you can to your
local organization to your national organization.
It's real, real, important that we take
care of ourselves as well.
Gautam Raghavan: Kristen.
Kristen Kavanaugh: We pride ourselves as
conversation starters.
And we believe that having those difficult conversations with
people will lead to more and more cultural change.
That's why we did the video that we wanted to do.
We wanted to start that conversation about the service
of military members and their families.
So, we want to get out nationally and have those
difficult conversations to keep it -- to keep the
momentum going.
It takes money and time to did that.
So giving or donating helps us get out and talk to more people.
Until we can get out nationwide, we need your help in starting
those difficult conversations.
There are situations that happen in everyday life and we let
those teachable moments pass us by because we don't talk about
it, we don't want to make people uncomfortable.
We are asking you to make people a little more uncomfortable in
the name of cultural change.
So that's something little that you can do.
If you hear someone use a slur, if you hear someone say
something demeaning, address it.
It's only going to be uncomfortable for a minute,
but it's going to make that person think the next time they
decide to say something that might be inappropriate.
So it all starts with a conversation.
If you are part of an organization that would benefit
from having somebody like us come to you and talk to your
staff or talk to anybody, we would love to do that to have
those conversations in the name of building a better team and
building a stronger team.
The word acceptance has been used a lot here today,
that's because it's a very powerful word and it can affect
your team, it can affect your community,
it can affect your business.
And that's what we are trying to do.
We are affecting that change in a positive way.
Adam Christ: I have to say I agree with everything that
everyone has said up here.
I think having the conversation that Kristen just talked about
is tremendously important because it gets people here.
And it seems counterintuitive, but when you get people in your
heart that's what changes their mind.
And that's what gets them to start thinking that I really --
I never really thought that this was affecting this group a
certain way or it was affecting the person a certain way.
And in addition to that I agree with volunteering your time or
donating money.
And if you're not sure where to go or where to start,
find something that's important to you and get a hold of a group
that is involved in that, a veteran's group,
your local LGBT center or a suicide prevention program or a
GSA, and say, how can I help.
Gautam Raghavan: Well, why don't we go
ahead and open it up.
I see a question here already.
Sean Knittel: Hello, I'm Sean Knittel,
the executive -- I'm sorry, the associate editor at the
Seattle Gay News.
I'm also a ten-year veteran of the U.S. Navy.
So I want to say thank you for your service and what
you're doing.
One of the things that I talk about a lot is to change the
culture of us and them, and I think that within the LGBT
community the responsibility falls on us to kind of influence
that change, that we can't continually separate ourselves
and we have to reach out to our straight allies,
and then challenge them as well to talk to their friends,
their family about why they do support us.
So, you know, Heather had pointed out that Drew is the
videographer for the video we submitted.
Drew is 22 years old and he is a straight ally to the
LGBT community.
On the end over here we have Daniel Hanks who we invited with
us who is also a straight ally to the LGBT community and has
raised money in Seattle for various projects .
And Doris, as well, is a straight ally who works at a
University in Philadelphia who has also been involved
without outreach.
And I challenge them to tell everyone in their life that,
you know, we know we have their vote,
we know we have their support, but they need to tell everyone
else that they do.
And what happens is more of their friends come forward to
talk about, you know, I am actually onboard with this.
So us and them.
And I think what I learned in the military was to mentor
people, people that are younger than you, to reach out,
to mentor them, and to influence that change in their life in a
positive way.
What I find with many LGBT youth today is that they don't
understand mentorship versus maybe a *** predator,
let's say.
The difference between the two is hard for some in our
community who are young to see that,
because we are not having conversations with young people
just as older gay men as older lesbians, you know,
as someone in the transgender community,
we are not doing that unless we have a title,
like I am a suicide prevention specialist.
So, my question is, with what, in regards to what you're doing,
how does your organizations approach mentorship and letting
people know to reach out and to talk to others,
how do you integrate that into what you do?
Gautam Raghavan: Terry, do you want to start?
Terry Stone: Sure.
I think the richness of community centers in the work
that they do is that they bring people from all walks of life,
all orientations, all genders, all gender identities, together.
I mean, our video team was certainly not just a lot of gay
people putting the film together.
Bruce Presley and Laura D'Antoni are in the office.
And the folks that they brought to this process was very rich
and very diverse in helping us tell the story of what we do.
That's what happens in community centers every day and that's
what -- they do the work to help mentor the folks coming in.
It's not always just young.
We also see a chance to mentor those that are older adults
coming into our buildings as well just because some of them
have been, maybe have been in heterosexual relationships for a
long time, something's happened in their life and
they have changed.
And so they are looking for mentors as well.
We believe it's very important that we don't put the
stereotypes that others won't identify us by out there that we
make sure folks know that we are here to help everyone that comes
in the door, that we are there to help mentor wherever you are
and whatever you need to, you know, need to have in your life.
And I think that's what centers do extremely well.
Gautam Raghavan: Kristen, did you want to add anything?
Or Adam?
Kristen Kavanaugh: Sure.
"Don't ask, don't tell" has only been repealed for a year.
So it's new for LGBT service members to start mentoring or
put a face to the issue.
So it's very important for our video participants who are all
here today by the way, so I would like to recognize
them for being here.
They are putting a face to the situation.
And they are the role models for those individuals who have yet
to come out or who still may be concerned about their command,
and so that's a huge step considering where we are in this
process for people to just stand up and say, hey,
I served our country, but I'm also gay or lesbian.
And so that's the first step for us,
let's just put a face to their service to really negate all of
the stereotypes that people have about us swinging from the
rafters and wearing boas, you know,
we've got people that are rescuing people out of
helicopters and getting blown up and things like that that are
really out there making a difference.
So thank you all for being role models and taking the step.
(applause)
Gautam Raghavan: So we have time for
one more quick question.
So, who's going to be really quick?
Right back there.
Can we grab him a microphone --
Audience member: I can speak really loud.
Gautam Raghavan: Or you can speak.
(laughter)
Audience member: (low audio) -- we have the only military
social program in the country and we've been there for about
three years now in that program.
We've got about 250 people who have come to the program.
But what is stunning to me and also comes out as a result of
this exchange, is with our students like Kristen and all of
the other ones that are here is how much human capital we've
lost in the military as a result of this policy,
but also recognizing that these folks are going to continue to
serve, but in a different capacity.
So we have them back.
Thank you very much.
(applause)
Gautam Raghavan: Absolutely.
And actually, Kristen, that prompted me to ask you this,
hopefully this last question, which is what,
what can we also do, you know, something that is always a
priority for us is taking care of our vets.
So what is it that we can do, the administration can do,
that folks in this room can do to help some of our folks who
are obviously tremendously talented?
Kristen Kavanaugh: First thing and one of
the most impactful things you can do is say thank you.
There is an entire generation, multiple generations,
that have not heard those two words.
And they are dying to hear it from us.
So if you can just take a moment and tell a service member,
tell a veteran, thank you, that's going to make all the
world a difference in their lives and build up their self
confidence, and hopefully, help them go out to do more.
If you're in a capacity where you can hire a veteran or you
can help them out in some other way, please do.
It's hard for us to go out and market ourselves as veterans.
We don't like to talk about that a lot because that's what we are
told to do in the military.
It's about the team.
We put other people before ourselves.
But if you have a chance to help somebody out, do it.
You won't be disappointed.
We all bring an amazing skill set to the table,
and you're going to want to hire more of us once you get the
first one in the door.
Gautam Raghavan: Well, thank you all very much.
I want to thank the panel.
Please give a round of applause.
(applause) And here to help us close out the program is my
boss, and the director of the Office of Public Engagement,
Jon Carson.
(applause)
Jon Carson: Well, welcome to the White House, everyone.
And I want to give a quick round of thanks to Gautam for putting
this event on today.
And so I'm here to end this LGBT video challenge,
Champions of Change event with an ask for all of you who are
here in the audience today and ask especially of our champions
today and all of you online as well,
and that ask is to help us tell the story of what you
saw here today.
Tell the story of your connection to what's going on
in the LGBT movement, what's going on in your community.
Tell the story of your passion, of your connection to the
stories that we're told today by our champions.
You know, we have a number of Champions of Change events here
at the White House, highlighting different issues,
and really highlighting the fact that while we may have policy
fights here in Washington, D.C. over everything from
budgets to taxes to who knows what,
there are thousands of Americans every day making change happen
in their communities like our Champions of Change here today.
And that's the story we need you to tell.
We need you to tweet it.
We need you to blog it.
We need you to write it.
We need you to find three people in the grocery store this week
and tell them about this, tell them your passion,
tell them your connection to this,
and my ask of you to do that is for two different reasons.
First, we just have some great ideas, some great stories,
some great best practice, some information to share
with people.
You may have heard today of an approach that's being taken in a
different part of the country.
You may have seen our very first musical ensemble at a Champions
of Change event today.
You may have concrete information to share and we
need you to do that.
But there's another reason I want your help in telling this
story of your champions today and that's that,
I think we want you all to agree on no matter how we come down on
the different policy fights that we are having in D.C., that we
are having across the country, we can all agree we need more
Americans believing they can be agents of change as well.
And when they hear the stories of what our champions of today
did of starting an organization that's provided support to
millions of families across the country,
when they hear the difference that's being made in school
districts, and communities, they are going to say maybe I
could do that as well.
And that is the number one outcome,
that is the goal of this entire program,
and we ask your help in doing it.
And one more big thank you to our Champions of Change today.
(applause)
Gautam Raghavan: So that concludes our program.
Thank you all for coming.
We will send around the blog post so you can forward this out
to your friends and networks.
So again, thank you so much.
Thank you to our champions.
And have a good day.