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Previously to the short film visualization...
...we would like to present our apologies and warn beforehand...
...about the very low sound quality, which is altered because of...
...problems caused during the recording and the editing of it.
Manuel Pico and Raúl Pradana
Present
Unindictable Denouncement (A Police History)
Hear on Spotify...
Stupid Spotify...
Hello, good morning.
Good morning.
You see, I come here to make a denouncement.
Aha...
Yes, you see, I was down there in the square...
...and a man comes to me and, well, he told me to gave him everything I had,...
...I got scared and I had to give him everything I had:
The wallet, the car keys,...
...a chicken leg, a Chupa Chups flavour pineapple-lemon...
Everything, I had to give him everything.
Ahm... Well, see, I'm very sorry.
But... Well?
Pardon?
But... Aren't you going to do anything?
Excuse me, but do I know you?
No, I don't think so.
Then, what do you want?
Let's see, I told you that I've been robbed and I come here to make a denouncement.
Yes, I've heard you, but I don't understand what do you want me to do.
Let's see, this is a police station.
Yes, this is the police station.
So?
So, what?
You are a policeman.
Yes, I'm a policeman.
Then I don't know what do you don't understand.
But, see, if I don't know you, I don't know why do you tell me that you've been robbed.
Can't you ask for help to a friend or to a relative?
Eh... What... This is a joke, a hidden camera?
What do you mean?
Let's see, I mean that I've been robbed and I come here to make a denouncement.
Oh! And you want me to make you the denouncement, right?
Exactly!
Well, man, then tell it before, I can't be here guessing all...
-But, how do you want...? -It doesn't matter, I forgive you.
I will ask you to tell me some personal data, alright?
-Tell me your first name. -Francisco.
Nice to meet you, I'm Fernando.
-And your surname? -Martín.
Yes, tell me.
What?
-Oh! Martín is your surname? -Yes.
Oh, alright, sorry, the thing is that my friends call me Martín, you know?
But didn't you say that your name is Fernando?
Yes, but they think that my name's Martín.
Although, I think it's time to tell them that actually my name is Antonio.
Antonio?
Yes, the thing is that Fernando is my policeman name, you know?
Actually my name for my friends is Carlos.
But if you just told me that your name's Antonio.
Oh, sorry, I meant Rodrigo.
Anyway, what's your address?
4 (Odd) Paquito III Street, 3Z.
A colossal building, yes indeed.
-What's your job? -I work in a bank [Banco: bank/bench]
Oh, no wonder your face sounded familiar to me.
But, anyway, let's not talk about me.
Right, let's talk about me. I remember once when I planted an onion...
No, no, no, I meant to continue with the short film.
Oh, sorry.
But, who was that?
It doesn't matter, tell me your phone number.
-Mobile phone or landline? -Landline.
You see, the thing is that I don't have a landline.
Well, it doesn't matter, then give me your mobile number.
But I don't have a mobile phone neither, but if you want, I can give you the one of my wife.
Alright, give me the one of your wife.
Well, really I've never had a couple.
Well, I won't meddle in that. Tell me your civil status.
Single, with two children.
With two children? Didn't you tell me that you've never had a couple?
It's a very long, full of grief history.
-Alright, are you a ***? -Pardon?
If you are a ***.
But, what kind of question is that?
Well, see, it's what it's written here. Are you a ***?
See, I don't think that's relevant in this case.
And, also, if I've told you that I have two children, I think that the answer is obvious.
Sir, I'm waiting you to answer me. Are you a ***?
But, what are you doing here?! And what do you do dressed like that?!
-Oh... Well... See... -Take off that uniform right now, by God!
Yes, right now, the thing's that I saw the uniform there and I always wanted to be a policeman...
Sorry, what's going on here?
Sorry, sir, I'm with you now.
Let's see, take off that uniform right now and get back to your work, by God.
Right now, right now.
Not here, by God, there are children watching the short film!
-Yes, sorry. -Go away!
What's this, by God...
Now it's fine... Well, what do you want?
Sorry, can you first explain me what has happened?
Yes, see, sir, it's the painter that has come to paint the dispatch wall.
The painter?
Yes, see, I really can't find excuses.
So better I won't take the trouble to apologize. Why have you come here?
Well, see, I came here to make a denouncement on robbery.
Alright, I will ask you to tell me some personal data, but first...
[With argentinian accent] Let's leave the formalities, right?
Yes, alright.
Anyway, your first name?
Eh... Francisco.
-With or without an "h"? -With an "h" after the "t".
What "t"?
Oh, true, many people get confused with that. It's pronounced "Francisco" but it's written "Samantha".
Oh, alright. Can you tell me your surname?
-Martín. -No, it's Marcelo. How are you?
No, Martín is my surname.
Oh, sorry, sorry.
Can you tell me your first name?
Eh... Again?
Pardon?
I say why again.
Again, what?
Tell my first name again.
What do you mean tell your first name again?
Yes, I just told you my first name.
Oh! You know what? Yes, I should told you.
The thing is that I suffer from short-term memory loss, you know?
Memory loss?
Yes, I mean, I tend to forget quickly the minor issues.
-Oh... -If you see that it happens again, please make me notice.
-Yes, of course. -Thanks. Your address?
4 (Odd), Paquito...
Oh, wait a minute, my pen is empty of ink. Can you excuse me a moment?
Yes, of course.
Oh! Good morning. What do you want?
Sorry?
What do you want.
Oh! Ok, I understand. Look, you were asking me my data for a denouncement.
You might have forgotten because of your memory loss.
Eh... Sorry, I don't understand you.
Yes, let's see, you've forgotten it because of your memory loss.
You were asking me my data.
No, you might have mistaken me with another person. I wasn't making you the denouncement.
Yes, let's see, you were asking me my data for a denouncement on robbery.
But as you suffer from memory loss, you've forgotten it.
No, really, I just started my shift. Also, I don't suffer from memory loss.
But, if you just told me.
What?
About your memory loss.
Eh... No, really, I don't suffer memory loss. Also, I don't remember talking to you.
Of course, it's logical that you don't remember it.
Why?
Because you suffer from memory loss.
No, sir, you must have mistaken me with other, I don't suffer from memory loss.
Let's see, you told me does not even two minutes that you suffer from memory loss.
You were asking me my data for a denouncement, the pen got without ink, you went to take another one...
...and you forgot it. It's logical that you don't remember it because you suffer from memory loss.
Excuse me, sir, but I think that if I forgot things, I would remember it.
Paradox.
Some people call it "oxymoron".
Sorry, but I prefer to speak with another officer, if you are so kind.
Alright, I call someone, but, really, I tell you again that you mistake me with another person.
Yes, I know.
0.02 seconds later.
-Hey, can you come a moment, please? -Yes, of course.
Thank you.
-Look, can you attend this man, please? -Yes, of course.
Alright, thank you, Tomás.
No, I'm Miguel.
Oh, sorry, it must be because of my memory loss.
-See? -That's a very cruel joke.
-Well, what do you want? -I came here to make a denouncement on robbery.
What?! You've been robbed?!
Eh... Yes, yes.
But, are you all right?
Yes, I'm fine.
-And when has it happened? -Well, a moment ago, there in the square.
-In the square?! That's hereabout! -I know, I know...
But how can you be robbed here? In this town nothing ever happens!
Well, it's a calm town, but...
I can't believe it! There is no more security anywhere!
-Well, it's not all that important. -How couldn't it be all that important?
And also in the square! There are children there!
Well, calm down, it's not the first time it happens.
It's not?! Do you mean that it has happened more times?!
Well, it's not often, but...
***! How can these things happen?! Even to such a young man!
Well, don't get that way, it's only a robbery.
And how did it happen?
Well, it was nothing, a man came to me, he took a knife...
With a knife?! You can't go outside no more without being attacked...
...by an homocide drug addict with a butcher's knife!
Well, don't get that way, it must be a poor man who has nothing to eat.
But don't defend him! We are talking about a knife, man! A knife!
But, calm down, man.
How can I calm down?! I haven't got no more the security...
...of take a calm walk without being attacked by a psychopath with a butcher's knife!
Sorry, but I think you're overreacting.
And I had come to live here, thinking it was a peaceful place,...
...away from crime, and now, this!
Well, calm down, Miguel, take it easy.
I can't believe this is happening.
-Come on, Miguel, calm down. -This is terrible.
Look, you know what? You're going to lie down there for a while.
Alright? You're going to rest a bit and later I'll prepare to you an infusion...
...so you can calm down. Relax, alright? Okay?
Well, now we're going to get up. Come on, get up.
Take it easy, okay? Don't worry, nothing's going to happen.
You're going to lie down here. Don't worry, nothing happens.
Lie down here, I'm going to cover you with a blanket, so you'll be warm.
And look who's here! It's Ceferino, your favorite friend!
Look, tell you what. Now I'm going to attend this man here...
...and then I'll be with you, alright? Now I come, okay?
-Well, forgive him, he's very sensitive. -Yes, I see.
-Anyway, why have you come? -I came here to make a denouncement.
Fine, I'm going to ask you your personal data. Can you tell me your name?
Francisco Martín.
Francisco Martín, Francisco Martín, Francisco Martín... Okay.
And can you tell me your address?
Sorry, aren't you going to write it?
Oh, no, the thing is that I can't write.
But... You can't write?
Yes, exactly.
Although, it's strange, granted that I wrote the short film script.
Haha! What a clever joke!
Look, you know what? I'll come back another day.
There are such weard people in the world...
Miguel!
A short film by Manuel Pico and Raúl Pradana
Raúl Pradana as the Impostor Painter, the Overreacting Man and the Clever Guy.
Ricardo Rosado as Samantha Pronunciation: [/franzisko/]
and Manuel Pico as himself, the Forgetful Bipolar, the Blind and the Innocent.
Music
Cameramen
We thank to our families for their support; to Marta Diz, Samantha López, Javier Marcos,...
...Richard Papai, Fritz Prüger and Cristina Troya for their contributions; to Joshua Iglesias...
...for the time that he never contributed; and to the El Escorial Youth Centre for their kindness.
The End
Yeah!
Special thanks to the the two duckling, who have appeared nonprofit.
Filmed on February 19 and 26, 2011.
PS: We told you, it sounds *** bad.