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At Yuletide, trees burn so bright.
First one, then two, then three, then four
Hark! There's fire truck at the door!
SERIOUSLY? I want a NICE Christmas poem, son!
So clean up your act!
Dear Santa, I don't want to nag
but, why are you dressed up in drag?
Last chance!
A reasonable poem, or you can forget about presents!
Oh Santa, with your sack of toys
You bring much joy to girls and boys
To bring us gifts at Christmas Tide
you have to work all day and night.
I didn't say anything - go on!
Tireless since hundreds years
you travel far with your reindeers.
No journey's too far through ice and snow.
You work so hard gifts to bestow.
Therefore today you shall be thanked:
To treat yourself now go get tanked.
Tanked?
Christmas spirit in a bottle
down your throat you pour full throttle.
Whiskey, ***, wine, hard liquor -
You drink all day to have some vigour.
That's it! Don't believe this brat!
Enough's enough - no presents for you!
Wheeee-heee-heee