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How to Observe Proper Wedding RSVP Etiquette. When planning the special day, it's critical
for the bride and groom to know how many people will be at the event. Don't leave the happy
couple hanging. You will need Pen and decorum. Step 1. Look at the invitation -- it should
note an RSVP deadline. It's there for a reason, as the bride and groom must give the caterer
an accurate headcount and plot the seating arrangements. Respond by the date indicated,
or the bride will have to track you down. Step 2. Fill out the enclosed response card
and abide by the names listed on the envelope. Adding the name of an uninvited date or child
is rude and puts the couple in the awkward position of having to explain their guest
list policy. It's become increasingly common for couples to send out a "save the date"
card months before the wedding, prior to mailing out the actual invitations. No response is
required. Step 3. Send regrets graciously. Check the appropriate box on the response
card to let the couple know you'll be unable to attend. Tradition dictates that you should
still send a gift, even if you're not going; but a handwritten note of congratulations
may suffice. Step 4. Read the response card. If it requests an RSVP, you'll need to respond
whether you're going to attend or not. If it states "Regrets Only," it means only those
who won't be attending need to reply. Step 5. Direct any wedding-related questions to
members of the wedding party. Don't bombard the already stressed-out bride or groom with
nit-picky issues and concerns, like what to wear to the ceremony. Step 6. Heed your own
reply. If you indicated you would attend the wedding, don't bail on the happy couple and
not show up. On the flip side, don't crash a wedding you said you wouldn't attend. Be
a conscientious guest or you may have to deal with an unhappy bride and groom and a damaged
friendship. Did you know RSVP is French for _repondez s'il vous plait_, which translates
into "please respond."