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>>>PJ: You have a great story of someone ripping off Emo
>>MG: It's me, the Great Tomsoni...
...& a ventriloquist who was Miss America.
I know; this is a crazy story.
It gets better!
>>PJ: Maybe not *a* ventriloquist who was Miss America...
...but *the* ventriloquist who was Miss America. 'Cause there haven't been a lot, have there?
>>MG: I don't remember her name, so I'm sticking with that.
The other person in the car was a female magician who was hosting at the Magic Island that week.
So we're driving out to go water skiing with this group of people,
and we are listening to your album, which is about to come out.
>>PJ: Where'd you get a copy of this record?
>>MG: I can't divulge that.
>>EP: This would be - I'm guessing - maybe December, '85.
>>MG: Okay. There ya go. & so we're driving....
>>EP: December, '84....Go on.
>>PJ: OK, make it '83 & we've got a deal!
>>EP: For you, '83; I'm not going a year earlier!
>>MG: We're listening to it, & we get to the joke in it that you do, "I loaned a friend of mine $5,000..."
[Everyone interrupts to stop Goudeau.] >>EP: I'll do it. [Dramatic pause]
How does it go? >>MG: Let me write it down for you. >>PJ: I remember:
♫ I loaned a friend of mine fifteen thousand dollars for plastic surgery... ♫
♫ ...& now I don't know what he looks like. ♫
>>PJ: A fine joke. >>MG: It kills in the car!
Here, eh, but in the car, KILLS.
>>EP: It's a good car joke. You don't want long car jokes.
Go on.
The female magician who was hosting at the Magic Island that week...
>>PJ: Who you DO know the name of, but aren't gonna say. >>MG: I DO know the name of her.
...she decides she's gonna - she tells us in the car -
(Apparently, doesn't know this is horrible) - "I'm gonna put that joke in my show tonight."
Johnny Thompson & I go, "You can't do that that's stealing material."
"You're just not allowed to do that."
She says, "Well, I really need a new opening joke & I'm gonna do it."
We tried our best to talk her out of it & said, "This is a terrible idea; you should not do that."
>>PJ: This is back in '85, when they didn't have rope or guns.
So they couldn't stop her from doing the joke. No gaffers' tape you could put over her mouth?
>>MG: Gaffers' tape hadn't been invented yet, no. So, I'm standing in the back in the room...
...Johnny Thompson's behind the curtain getting ready to do the show; she comes out & says,
"I loaned a friend of mine fifteen thousand dollars; Now I don't know what he looks like."
Entirely skipping the plastic surgery part!
So there's no laugh at all, except for me, at the back of the room, howling...
...and I can hear Johnny Thompson, behind the curtain, laughing really hard!
After the show, she goes, "That joke didn't work at all.
"I've got no idea why; I'm gonna try it again the next night."
And for the next three nights,
...she tries it, & leaves out an important detail each time -
...a different important detail - & decides the problem is the joke.
"This joke sucks; that Emo doesn't know what he's doing.
"I don't know why I laughed at that joke. There's nothing funny in that joke."
>>EP: She kept leaving out an essential middle every evening.
"All men are Socrates; therefore, Socrates is Greek."
[Laughter]
She was not even the Miss America? >>MG: No, this is not the Miss America,
...who was a professional, & knew she shouldn't steal that joke.
>>MD: This is like joke thief Darwinism.
>>EP: Emolution.
[Laughter]