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Meh.
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-Subtitled with DivXLand Media Subtitler 2.1.0-
....still loading....
Initiating - Real rough English translation from Swedish.
Oh, God.
***.
Brilliant.
Can I be arsed to play with facecam?
What did you say?
Can I be arsed to play with facecam?
Do whatever you feel like, I won't be watching.
'Cos I'm playing with you!
Yeah I know, but it might be cool.
If someone's watching your stream, the facecam might make them stay.
Well, that is true.
It's more fun to see peoples reaction rather than just hearing.
??????????????
Ah, *** dat shiet.
Uhm...
K.
Gotta configure dat shiet.
Am I able to...
Ah, right. One is able to pilla with the *** while streaming.
God, ***'....
First time setup is taking forever.
Pre... Pre-launch thingy?
Yeah.
Yepp. took me shitlong time.
Hnng, why am I dropping frames??
????
???????
AH!
WTF IS THIS?
Oh, it's coming from you?
What?
It scared me tho.
Heh.
EXACTLY! That fffft-sound!
No! It's the game. D:
Yeah?
Shh, *** dat shiet. -.-
LOL! You're already jumpy! :D
NAEHAAAAAAAAAAEEHNNNNnnnnnnnn
What is 3D-menu?
blablabla
Oh well, I'm launching the game in the meantime.
BRB, gotta pee
What?
GOTTA PEE BRB!
FFTTT
Well, *** dis shiet.
TAKATAKATAKATAKATAKA
Where is...?
Noooo, where is hnnnnnn....
Chippy?
I lost my ***.
Ugh...
FFTTT
***
Yes.
Whaattaaafakkk....
Dang.
Well!
Hello!
Hello!
Why does this game have to be a pain in the *** to play boarderless.
Wah?
Why does this game have to be a pain in the *** to play boarderless.
Ah.
I wonder how it'll go to play fullscreen.
Seems scary tho, dat tram or whatever it is that's driving around.
It's Stockholm...
WELL HOW ABOUT THAT ***...
Hi Schäfer!
Is it Schäfer?
It is, it is stream. It is Schäfer.
Disable poop in-game, cos it would be bad if you had poop in-game.
Poop being voice.
How do I shoot web?
Eh.
Blablablabla
I GOTTA HAVE MY SWEATER.
WHERE IS MY SWEATER?
CAN'T FIND MY SWEATER!!
Laundry-rack.
I CAN'T FIND MY SWEATER, IT'S COLD! ;_;
flop.
I'm gonna see if I can invite you...
Well, well!
Got myself an invite! :D
Hoeeee!
Remember to allow the game in your firewall.
Nice!
No! What is this! Noooo!
What?
Static noises are scary! ;_;
Go change your name.
Where?
Options.
Dahaa.
Something's taking pictures.
Something's slowing my *** down.
I am back.
Dat feel when utorrent *** *** up.
Well yeah, it usually does that.
blablabla internet-talk.
New name in the chat, Mr Almoorn.
He says "Hello hello".
Hello!
HELLO!
I AM READY!
DUDE WAIT I'M NOT READY!
THIS GAME IS SO LOUD! D:
Then maybe my computer is high(loud), 420 was recently and all.
HAH!
HAH!
My body is ready!
I've seen Pewdiepie play this, it looked ***.
I've also seen him play it, didn't look scary at all.
Also, he screams a lot.
Barrels, and so on.
I'm sorry Almoorn, but this will mostly be in Swedish.
But we will probably say "***" a lot.
So at least you can understand that! :D
We can try to speak English?
Neeeehhhh.
I think he left.
Did he leave?
I think so.
Dat swedish-english.
Simon's Book.
Oh my god, no.
SHIIIIEEEEE DEM GRAPHICS BRO!
Who cares about spoilers?
I just wanna poop my pants.
AH! Look at this mighty fine Swedish house with white knutar!
Dem Swedish houses.
Simon is not home.
Well, I am police guy. Open.
LOOK AT THIS BIKE!
It's pixels and ***.
Is the stream laggin, or not?
I don't get it, are we supposed to...
We should obviously...
We are gonna find Simon!
You can aim with middle-mouse button.
UHHUUUUUUUUUAAAAAAH!!! D:
???????
???????
Hello?
Wah!
Did the noise come from you?
What noise?
It sounde like SCCHEEHHH-BEEP.
I cannot recreate sounds.
Heh.
I gotta try the volume.
I guess that's fine.
There's a magazine here.
En magazin
AH! You gotta blip-...
GOD *** DAMNIT!
There's a magazine here!
At the door.
I like how people are like, ah magazine-...
Just like America!
OH NO DATS RACIST!
DAATS RACIST!
Why do I get the feeling that this is...
Come here.
Buuuut....
AH ***!
I dc'd.
Try to join again.
AH!
No! STOP THAT! I can't join!
BUT WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO!?
I guess you'll have to start over???
You can start.
I've invited you btw.
You can start.
K!
Do we have to watch this dialogue? :(
I DON'T WANNA!
We must...
And the ghost goes into his ***!
Schlup!
OK! Let's go!
Where is Simon?
The lights are on now...
They were always on.
Not for me.
Cool, you see the interior of the house.
?????????
Well, I saw that the lights were on before.
Overe here is a knife. Or no, just heroine.
Oh cool, there's drugs on the street.
Standard Sweden-style.
???????
Help!
Help!
Help me!
Some bullets here.
Help me!
Help me God damnit!
Help over here!
Found something!
Let's go.
I took the previous clip so you take the next one.
And then I have to let you know that I found something.
Get over here!
Nope, that's the wrong one!
Uh, take it.
Imma say something.
Help!
Nae.
How do you say stuff?
Eh, X, C and B.
Help!
???????????????
PLEASE, DON'T *** UP!
YES!
NOOooooo!
WTF IS THIS?
UUUUUUUHHHGGGG....
Just try rejoining...
It doesn't work... it will just say poop.
Or maybe not?
YES!
I got in! :DD
*** yeah!
But man do I hate video-games.
Look here, take the drugs!
I can promise you that all the cars are Volvo.
WÖH!
Yeeeh!
Heavy weapons!
AAH AHHH WHAT IS THAT?????????
SHOOT IT!
I.. I CAN'T CHANGE WEAPONS!
How do I change weapons?`
***, ***.
Take care of me while I take a look in the config.
Eeeeehhhhhhhhhhh..
???????????????????
Ok!
Ey, we got a beat-stick.
How do we change weapons then?
TAB.
Do we have to click 'em?
There are quickslots, but I'm a retard.
THat's cool, you seem to be able to dual wield!
Well then, that was weird, he came out of nowhere.
Ah ***, they're running!
Wuääh!
Dat recoil.
Look at that guy, he look *** creepy!
I'm shaking, kind of.
AH! D:
OUCHIE!
Wa, wa, I heard..?
Is there something shooting at you?
I dunno.
Over there.
Is that a floating bed!?
Looks like it.
AH! ***! WHADDAFAKK! WHAAT! WHAT!
HUEHUE WHAT?
WHERE DID HE COME FROM?
Oh my days.
Oh, what the ***. I hit my hand on something.
If this is Stockholm, I don't wanna live here.
Ok, eehhh...
You want the shotgun this time?
WUÄH!
What?
Good thing there was something right infront of me as I exit the inventory...
Ey, that might be a thing.
*** spawns if you're idle too long?
Take the shotgun.
No, I got a rifle.
Where did you get the rifle...?
Okay!
What is that bed?
Did we kill the bed?
Nooo, wtf is that?
WHUUUUP!
What?
WAAAAHHHHH!!
WHAT!?
STOP IT!
What the ***?
WHAT THE ***!?
He just came at me bro!
AWH ***!
No!
Nono!
Kill him!
AWH ***!
WOAH! He ded!
I got no bullets, that's fun.
Aaahhh, bullets.
Thank you.
What the ***...
Dude, this game seems awesome!
Ah, bed!
A bed!
Save ammo against these guys.
Come 'ere!
Wah!
Come back here!
I like how they die.
Out of ammo.
NO! I don't wanna go into the house! ;_;
UUUAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
AAAHH! AAAHHHH! AAAAHHHh!
WHAT THE ***!?
GRANMA!!?
WHAT THE ***!?
;___________________;
What the ***!?
Jesus...
Ohohoi my God!
Yes, I'm easily scared. Especially when it comes to games.
There's ammo here.
I really need ammo...
I thought I saw ammo...
Wha?
I thought I saw something flash in the bushes.
It was just my imagination!
The door won't budge!
Okay, after you?
Ah! What the *** is this?
Kill alien-baby!
***!
Holy ***' ***.
Dobrze
Now, now, I am so-....
Turn on the lights!
Ok, I'm in. Pistol ammo.
I guess we're going here?
Oh no, Oh no. Please don't DC!
Ah ***, ah ***, ah ***.
***, ***, ***.
***.
I suck at melee.
There's no friendly fire on right?
No.
Good, otherwise we would have been dead long ago.
There's a gun here.
Conserve ammo!
Ah ***, he hit me!(Irony much?)
What are drugs for?
It's morphine.
Drugs.
Probably when you're low on HP.
Right, you can dual wield the pistols.
Hint from Schäfer(in the chat). MMHMMHMMMHMM!
It won't let me.
You can dash.
Dislaimer about swearing. Swedes crying of fear is pretty much swearing
Ah!
I picked up a Glock.
We have a pretty large-...
I can't dual wield.
Me neither.
Maybe you have to...
Pick this up, and drop your Glock.
Maybe you have to have two of the same weapon.
I picked up your ammo instead.
Well then, you get the Glock.
There is someone there!
Hello?
Mr. Man?
Why's he black though?
UUAAAH, dat bloodsplat!:D
Uhae...
They get stunned if hit in the back?
HOW CAN HE SLAP ME?
That's what I wanna know!
Ok, was there anything up there?
Haven't checked yet.
A shotgun.
Is it another *** bed?
Up there.
Dat recoil tho when you shoot!
Be prepared tho, they can go through the bushes.
Like these bushes.
So I dunno if they can spawn out of our sight. And ambush us.
Wat's this?
Looks like shotgun shells.
Nice, I needed that ***.
I am heavy weapons guy.
Ew...
Ahahahahaaaaaa!
Hahahååå, here's ammo.
No, it's drugs.
But where is drugs?
AH ***! I'M STUCK IN HIM!
HELP CHIPPY CHIPPY HELP HELP! D:
CHIPPY! ;__;
CHIPPY!!!! ;_______________;
I'm on it!
I almost died! How do I drugs?
Chat pls?
UH OH UH OH UH OH
Wtf?
Chat pls, how do I drugs?
WÖÖÖUUUUH WHAT IS THAT!?
Rifle dat shiet, bitchniggguh.
Oooohhh my God.
Tab>Use? I don't have any drugs in my inventory...
I know I picked some up.
Did you pick up the drugs?
You equip the drugs.
You got drugs on you, sir?
Yeah.
YOU GOT DRUGS ON YOU, YEAH?
MHM, YEAH, MHM, YEAH?
Is that knark?
Huh, what? *** that, let's just go.
We haven't missed anything except the shotgun?
Which is the only weapon I got ammo for.
Knark.
I'm pretty sure.
The door is locked.
Just like the real Sweden. Who the *** leaves their door unlocked?
Heh.
I mean, why would you tho?
Ammo here, Imma pick that *** up.
15 rounds, that's nice!
But nooo, it was Glock ammo. ;_;
***, how? ***.
How do you drop ammo?
Damn Rack, take it easy.
I didn't know there were different types of ammo. ;_;
ÖÖööhhh. Da duwb dat drain se sa sewage pipe!
Dash!
Double tapping does the dash! :3
There's no time for controls!
Here is drugs.
***!
Poppin' pills!
Looks like morphine, that's a strong whatever! :D
Aha.
Don't leave my up here! ;_;
Yeh. ;)
Dat Swedish voice-acting.
???????????
DDDDDDDDD:
I knew it, I *** knew it! ;__;
Too lazy to sub this.
Basically, game crashed and bugged out. Had to restard from the beginning.
Just fast forward this.
Welcome back!
K, basic ***. Just loot the porches.
Aha!
There's one over there.
You cannot carry more ammo.
How many you got?
Like 3?
blablabla
People should make more scary co:op games.
Did you press, or did I?
You.
Cool, didn't dc.
Oh so it's here the rifle is.
Here's drugs.
AH AH OH *** WTF! D:
Aha, he came from nowhere. He stood over there before.
Ah ***, gotta lower my volume.
And last time, as soon as I picked up the shotgun. He appeared from somewhere else.
This game is whack.
Like tobaacyyy.
Maps are whack.
Pick up the rifle.
I don't want it, it sucked.
Take the shotgun then.
The rifle wasn't ***, just.. I dunno.
Pick up the shotgun already!
Where is it?
Over here.
Oh, the rifle is automatic poop.
Oh ***.
OH ***!
Ah, ***.
It kills stuff from a good distance.
Okay, let's not die to that guy.
*** you.
Did you take the morphine in the beginning?
Nah.
Fuuuuuuuuck.
Ah ***, Chippy?
Shoot him with the rifle.
Wuaeh! He's fast like a ***.
Uuuuuh, no ammo left...
Ok, what?
Ah, jesus. What?
Restarting map.
?????????????????????
We suck at video games.
Tho now there isn't a-....
AAAAAHHHHHHHHHH SHIIIIT WHAT THE FUUUCK!!! D:
*** you!
I got stuck again!I got stuck again! I got stuck again!I got stuck again!I got stuck again!
I'M TRYING!
Yeah, but...
It's not like I'm blaming you. I'm just panicking!
So yeah, you can just put some pressure on my chest and I'm alive!
Dis gaem so randum! :3
Hi.
Pretty hard to sub this when I'm constantly blabbering about something.
He's here again.
***!
Wasted all my ammo.
Whew, I'm so scurred right now.
Thanks, Gunnar!
My name is Gunnar?
Right, my name is Gunnar. And you're name is Johan.
Ey! >:C
I don't have drugs on me, I promise.
Officer.
K, where is bed?
Aw ***.
I don't really know where to shoot.
I'm trying to shoot the actual guy.
Ok, apparently you can shoot wherever.
Well, I shot him just as he died tho.
Watch out for the-.... Oh my God, all the beds!
Oh my God.
I'm like all out of ammo.
*** you bed!
Beat down on this ***!
HIHIIII
Did you take damage from that?
No.
Good, cos I was afraid you would. (When the bed falls on you)
Oh no, granma again!
***, and we got no ammo.
And she was dangerous!
Granma?
UAHÖÖ!
No, no. It's just alien baby.
Was she in here then?
Ah, alien baby.
Get out, alien baby.
ALIEN BABY, GET OUT ALREADY! D':
*** spettad and ***.
I have 9 HP.
Then it's better if you lead, so I can revive if anything happends.
Here's some drugs.
KNAAAAARK!
HÖH KNARK HUUUEHHUHAEUAEH
Please wait until everyone is ready.
I wasn't even done but okaay!
Oh noe!
AAHH!
WOW!
Are you scared of these?
But they were two! ;_;
Alien baby over there.
There's the Glock.
Where
There, on the porch.
*** youuuu!
blablabla ammo, weapons, blablabla
I suck at aiming!
There's a thing in the air!
I'm almost dead again. This game was hard.
Pretty sure another big guy will appear.
Did you pick up the shotgun up here?
Yeah.
Ok, where's the big guy? Feels like all the enemies are placed random.
Ah ***, there he is! (No ***!)
I'm out of ammo.
Oh ***.
Ååååhhh!
Let me try first, I'm low on HP.
It works.
He can turn around pretty fast.
I don't wanna walk anymore this way.
Take my glock.
I got ammo.
You did?
Yeah.
Then you can take my other gun.
GOT AMMO.
bla bla ammo
AHHH CHIPPY!
Police brutality, *** yeah!
I think this is glock ammo.
Yeahm,it was.
Remember what-.. ååååhhh.
That guy probably killed Palme.
Use the drugs!
Now then?
Down here, but remember that thing.
:D
Always as scary.
Let's hope *** won't crash.
Wait, let me check the map name.
blabla pattern.
Just drive.
Blip.
Bl-lip.
Ready?
Yeah.
Nice.
Ouch.
I didn't lost any health cos I jumped on you! :DD
There's someone standing there.
Tired of subbing screams :/
Got no ammo left.
I can hear the train. If we get there, then we're safe.
Dem soundeffects.
This is the right way, but there was another way we could go.
Probably phat loots.
Ah ***, where am I going?
Damn.
Let me go first, I got the beat-stick!
Nice, dat gun.
Hm, it think this is glock ammo.
Is it?
Yeah, this gun uses glock ammo.
Then that gun would be good for you.
"Is a donator-only weapon"
Why even put it there, *** ***.
blablabla code
What was that?
That was scary.
***, it was glock ammo. Why'd I pick it up?
Take it easy...
Jibberish
I'll be careful.
*** you, die!
We kinda glitch together when we pass through each other.
Let me hit him, just back.
Dat invincibility-frame.
Inb4 some scary ***.
You should be the one leading the way, since you're streaming it.
My point! :D
You were saying! >_<
You should be the one leading the way, since you're streaming it.
Yeah you're just my... guy stuck in a hole.
How'd you get up?
Have you never played any Valve-games before!?
Wat.
Jump+Duck, you nut.
Right.
;__;
What's that sound?
Us walking.
There's medicine here, you should use yours and take it.
You can only pick one up?
Yeah.
That's nice, are we going here?
It's pretty hard to see loot.
Shotgun here.
Wait, wait.
What?
I can't hear anything... Accidently pulled out the headset-cable. ^_^
Two shotgun shots didn't even kill that ***.
???
What now?
I'm getting too old for this ***!
Go upstairs then!
;____________________;
WHAT!?
YOU KNEW THAT WOULD HAPPEN!!
No, I didn't.
Oh my God.
***.
If you could feel my heart right now.
You doing ok?
There's people here, at my corpse.
Such a dramatic view! I see flashlights and hear gunshots etc.
This wasn't fair at all, I thought I was supposed to run away.
A little funny that I don't have any ammo. And all ammo we find is Glock ammo.
Here.
Aha.
I feel safe here.
Nothing here.
This flashlight sucks.
People still looking at your stream?
Yeah, I'm funny to watch. You should know this.
We're back from where we came from. Ah, so we can go up the stairs.
Then this way.
Inb4 mobs respawning.
Would be scary if you saw someone out there. But all you see is badly textured trees.
Okay then! Can we be done soon?
I'm getting shitfaced, well not shitfaced, but...
You understand what I'm sayin', sayin'.
Why this sudden FPS-drop?
I dunno, I'm getting it too.
*** yeah, shotgun and more glock ammo.
Ey, there's someone out there!
You can see "it" when the light flashes.
Here's more stuff, look at the ground.
Syringe 'n stuff-.
A stick! :D
Take the syringe, I just took one.
Another shotgun. Is that glock ammo or not?
Not.
What are these sticks for?
Tree branch - "Not really a weapon but at least something useful out here".
It's not like we got a beat-stick or anything...
This is too damn scary!
He's standing over there, in the middle of nothing. And you can see him with the sudden lightflash.
Did you seem him?
Didn't see ***, captain.
What IS that?
It's kids! :D
Go on.
Wait, trying to see. It's a big guy, I don't wanna waltz right into him.
Ouchie! D:
Can you kill 'em?
You can probably shoot them, but is it worth it?
Ow, *** you.
Big guy's coming, big guy's coming.
Jump, jump past them.
Ah, don't stand there! D:<
Ammo on the ground.
Thank you.
Ah, a big, big guy.
Ouchie...
Ah ***.
Good thing I took the syringe, and you already have one.
Ow.
We must try to kill it.
ON MY LAST BULLET!
What ammo is that laying there?
I didn't see. I was stupid enough to stop.
Looks like mine. Yeah, it was.
HE DIED ON MY LAST BULLET!
Ah ***.
What's that, rifle?
Looks like a sniper rifle.
Not the same as before? Take the syringe, take the syringe.
I don't know.
It was a hunting rifle.
There's someone coming.
I flew straight to hell when I jumped.
Shot in the head takes care of 'em.
*** Christ!
This is totally inconvenient.
Another syringe, you should take it.
Where is it, laying there?
Yeah.
Just go.
*** Christ.
Ah ***.
Ah ***.
Ah oh, I need to use my syringe.
Me too,
This is toootally inconvenient and annoying.
I can see that the both ways we COULD take is leading to the same place.
***, it's taking forever to kill them.
Yeah, imagine me with my puny little pistol.
Lots of weapons here.
Glocks, syringe.
What is this?
A revolver.
You take 'em.
Oh ***! It's time to go! D:
That was a bit too creepy.
Working fine so far.
OH ***!
My character is more afraid than I am.
Inventory full, got a sniper and a semi-auto. Shame they don't use the same ammo.
You should go first.
Ah, tree branches! :D
Yeah, let the scaredy cat go first.
Might be ammo out here, or maybe more dangers?
Nope.
Sticks everywhere.
Oh, oh, ooooh!
So damn many.
Oh, so THEY are making that breathing-noise. I always thought it was me.
This game is hard as balls.
OH! D:
Did you see that?
Did he just spawn?
He spawned right infront of me.
Took a syringe and he spawned.
Can't hit him sometimes.
It's because he gets an invincibility-frame when getting hit.
What is that sound?
Where?
I think it's a chainsaw-man.
Can't you hear the BZZZZZZZZ?
Nah, I lowered my volume so I could hear you.
It's coming from over there.
Sounds like bees. But it's probably a chainsaw.
Aha, I don't think it's anything.
Go in then.
ARE YOU STOOPID?
BUT YOU'RE STREAMING, IT'S MORE FUN.
You're low on HP, you go. Or no, you have the most ammo, you don't go.
***, I died.
That is totally what I thought would happen.
That is unfair. :(
????
Where is he?
I can't see him...
Me neither.
That was a waste, I lost everything.
Me too...
Nooo, our beat-stick. :(
This is totally unfair.
MHMH!
***.
***.
How is this doable?
There's a rifle right there.
Is there?
Yeah, or no, it's random.
You got it?
Yeah.
What the ***?
Ok!
That's reasonable.
What the ***, this game?
Don't go in.
Let me go in, God damnit!
How in the world are we supposed to do this?
I don't know,
Woah!
What?
He just ran out.
He's standing here, derpin'.
This is how you video games.
I got stuck in a mob. I got stuck in a mob. I got stuck in a mob. I got stuck in a mob. I got stuck in a mob.
You want to keep the rifle, or shotgun?
I will try the rifle.
Some weird-*** pistol here.
Couldn't you pick it up?
I didn't try, it just looked weird.
It's a pistol with a stock.
Who the *** makes a game with weapons and thinks, "Ah, we should have that one with "hyten"".
This is strong stuff, i should be careful with it. Just pump it in my vein.
Next area, thank god.
Isn't it always like this? We try to play a game, but it crashes and dc's all the time.
And then later on, it's prefectly fine?
Or...?
My game crashed... :/
I still don't hear you.
Helloh?
That's better!
He scared me.
Mmmh. I, too, got a bit shaken!
Just random gibberish about where to go. Specualtions and ***.
Jesus, more forests. :/
Weird ambience sound.
Mnja.
Ey.
Damn, oj.
Can you see Stockholm?
Stockholm City.
We are almost inside Stockholm.
Pls let this be the end.
What sorcery is this?
Oj.
Jump up on the rock.
Nice.
Ammo and ***.
Over here maybe?
What filler levels are these?
TRAIN!
What?
Tere's a train here.
How do we get in?
We won't be able to run back because we got no stamina.
I got stamina.
WELL I AIN'T.
*** da police.
Ey, we are the police.
I found the entrance. Get over here.
He beat me. :c
Nooooooooooo.
Should killed him instead.
I had no ammo. :/
Except the sniper rifle that I forgot I had!
Come, gogogogogo. Come to me, come, come, come.
WHERE IS COME!? D:
HERE!
Oh ***, too late.
Run now.
Ohuh.
*** me!
Just gogogogo!
There is a small, open door. Press it!
Was it really that simple?
Yeah.
HNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGG.
I won't sub the rest.
This is the end.
Thanks for watching!