Tip:
Highlight text to annotate it
X
- ♪ OH, THE CARDS BEGIN TO SHOW ♪
♪ THE SUN IS SAYING NO ♪
♪ BUT EVERYONE'S SO DELICIOUS ♪
- OH, MY GOD, SEX IN MY MOUTH ♪
- SO YOU WENT TO MEZZE LAST NIGHT?
- IT'S PROBABLY ONE OF THE BEST MEALS I'VE HAD.
I WAS, LIKE, HOW DO I JUMP INTO THE BOWL
AND SMEAR IT ALL OVER MY BODY, IT WAS THAT GOOD.
- THE L.A. FOOD SCENE IS BLOWING UP.
- THAT WAS SO GOOD.
- I WOULD THROW MY MOTHER
DOWN A FLIGHT OF STAIRS FOR THAT.
- L.A.'s DEFINITELY THE PLACE YOU WANT TO BE
IF YOU WANT TO MAKE A NAME FOR YOURSELF.
- IT'S AN HONOR TO BE HERE. THIS IS INCREDIBLE.
- RIGHT NOW, MEN DOMINATE THE INDUSTRY.
BUT GUESS WHAT? THAT'S ABOUT TO CHANGE.
- IT'S OVERCOOKED, WAY TOO SALTY.
- I BELIEVE I CAN MAKE OR BREAK A RESTAURANT.
- I GAVE UP MY ENTIRE LIFE SAVINGS
TO OPEN UP THIS BUSINESS.
MY MENTALITY IS, SHUT YOUR [bleep] MOUTH AND YOU WORK.
- HEY. - YES, CHEF?
- BIG [bleep] UP!
- I WILL NEVER WORK FOR A MAN AGAIN.
I JUST WANT TO BE RESPECTED AS A CHEF, PERIOD.
- THE ONLY THING BETTER THAN A GREAT MEAL
IS A GREAT MEAL WITH A HOT GUY. - YES, YES.
- DO IT. - OH, [bleep] YEAH.
- I WOULD NEVER, LIKE, NOT DATE A CHEF 'CAUSE HE'S A CHEF.
- WHOO! - I'D PROBABLY BE MORE INCLINED
TO DATE THE GUY 'CAUSE HE'S A CHEF.
- YOU'RE A CHEF, YOU HAVE TATTOOS.
YOU'RE EVERYTHING UNDER THE SUN
THAT I'M NOT HAVING ANYTHING EVER TO DO WITH.
- I DON'T DATE CHEFS.
- I COOK FOR A LIVING, I'M PRETTY FIT.
I MEAN, I'M 110 POUNDS OF PURE [bleep] FEAR.
- TODAY I LIKED YOU, AND NOW I DON'T LIKE YOU ANYMORE.
- I DON'T CARE.
- WE MAY ALL LOVE FOOD,
BUT WE MAY NOT ALWAYS LOVE EACH OTHER.
- DON'T COME TO ME BECAUSE YOU HAVE
A HURT [bleep] FEELING ABOUT DIP!
- IT'S SORORITY-LIKE.
IT DOES GET CATTY, IT DOES GET COMPETITIVE.
- I'M A [bleep] PUBLICIST. I WILL [bleep] RUIN YOU.
- IT HAPPENED, LIKE, NOW. I NEED A DAY.
- [bleep] ALL OF YOU.
- BUT AS WOMEN, WE GOTTA STICK TOGETHER
IF WE'RE GONNA MAKE IT TO THE TOP.
all: CHEERS.
- ♪ I BEEN WAITING FOR THE TIME TO COME ♪
♪ WHEN I CAN RULE THIS TOWN FOR SURE ♪
♪ STIR IT UP ALL NIGHT, SHOW THEM I'M ALL RIGHT ♪
♪ BE THE QUEEN AND MORE ♪
♪ LOOK AT ME, I'M THE SCENE ♪
♪ AND I'LL SAY WHAT I MEAN ♪
♪ SO WATCH ME NOW ♪
♪ I'M SERIOUS ♪
[funky upbeat music]
- ♪ WHOO ♪
♪ ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT ♪
♪ ♪
- HOLY, [bleep], IT'S TOO EARLY.
♪ ♪
- GOOD MORNING.
WHEEEW!
GOD SAVE US ALL.
JESUS, MAN!
YOU CAN'T LEAVE, LIKE, LITTLE NAKED
[bleep] NUDIE SPOTS, DUDE. [bleep], SIR.
MAKE IT LOOK SEXY! MAKE IT LOOK PRETTY!
FONUTS IS THE BEST BAKERY THAT EXISTS ANYWHERE.
IT'S MY BABY.
A FONUT, BY DEFINITION, IS A DOUGHNUT
THAT IS BAKED AND/OR STEAMED, NEVER FRIED.
IT'S TAKING AN AMERICAN CLASSIC AND PUTTING
A FUN, MODERN TWIST ON IT.
BEAUTIFUL. THANK YOU.
I'VE HAD GREAT SUCCESS IN MY CAREER.
I WAS A VERY HIGH-PAID PASTRY CHEF AT THE BAZAAR.
THAT LOOKS PERFECT! BEAUTIFUL.
HOWEVER, I WASN'T HAPPY.
I CREATED THIS DESSERT THAT WAS AMAZING.
I GAVE IT TO THIS CHEF, AND HE STARTED
JUST PICKING THINGS OFF THE PLATE.
HE JUST COMPLETELY BUTCHERED IT.
MY SOUL WAS SUFFERING, AND I WAS DONE.
I WAS OUT. NO MORE.
[belches]
- WHY DO YOU HAVE TO [bleep] DO THAT?
[bleep] GOSH! - SOMETIMES I FEEL LIKE A CHILD
CAUGHT BETWEEN TWO PARENTS.
- YOU'RE WHOLEHEARTEDLY THE CHILD CAUGHT
BETWEEN TWO PARENTS.
WHEN I FINALLY SAID [bleep] YOU TO BEING A CORPORATE CHEF
AND THE CRAZY [bleep] WORLD, I'VE NEVER BEEN HAPPIER.
[entry bells jingle] HI.
WE HAVE A NEW FONUT FLAVOR TODAY.
- WHAT DO WE GOT? - JELLY-FILLED.
- SOLD. OH, YEAH.
- COFFEE? - YES, PLEASE.
- I'VE HAD QUITE A FEW GUYS TAKE A BITE OF A FONUT
AND ASK ME OUT ON A DATE.
BYE.
BUT I JUST GOT OUT OF A RELATIONSHIP
WITH A HIGH-PROFILE CHEF, AND I'M DEFINITELY NOT
IN ANY HURRY TO GET INTO ANOTHER ONE.
HOLY [bleep]. THANK YOU. THAT'S SO [bleep] PRETTY.
[laughs] "I CAME INTO FONUTS,
AND NOW I'M SO NUTS FOR YOU."
[laughter] - WELL, WHO'S IT FROM?
- IS IT ANONYMOUS? - IT DOESN'T SAY WHO IT'S FROM.
- GUESS WHAT I'M GONNA DO?
- WHO THE [bleep] ARE THEY FROM, THOUGH?"
I WANNA KNOW WHO SENT ME THE FLOWERS.
- MY NAME'S NANCY. I'M CALLING FOR FONUTS.
IT'S A BAKERY HERE IN WEST HOLLYWOOD.
AND YOU GUYS JUST SENT US SOME FLOWERS,
AND WE WERE WONDERING WHO THEY WERE FROM.
- FINE.
- THEY WON'T TELL YOU? - THEY WON'T TELL ME.
THESE GUYS SEE YOU, AND THEY ARE SO SMITTEN.
- THAT'S AMAZING. ONLY YOU, WAYLYNN.
- NEVER A DULL MOMENT. [laughter]
- ♪ THE MOMENT THAT I MET YOU ♪
♪ I KNEW THAT I COULD GET YOU ♪
♪ YOUR LOVE KILLS ME ♪
- HI. HOW ARE YOU? - HI.
- I'M DOING A RIB TASTING AND WALK-THROUGHS
AND CHECK-INS, AND... - VERY COOL.
- MAKING MY ROUNDS OF ALL THE RESTAURANTS.
FOR MY TENTH BIRTHDAY, MY PARENTS ARE, LIKE,
"OH, WHAT DO YOU WANT FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY?"
AND I'M, LIKE, "A 401K PLAN."
- THESE ARE THE SHORT RIBS.
- I'VE WORKED REALLY HARD TO GET WHERE I AM
AS HARRY MORTON'S RIGHT HAND.
HARRY MORTON COMES FROM THE MORTON'S STEAKHOUSE LEGACY.
WE OWN THE FUKU BURGER, THE PINK TACO,
AND THE VIPER ROOM ON THE SUNSET STRIP,
ALL IN L.A.
I'VE BEEN SCARED TO HAVE HARRY TRY THE NEW RIBS.
I DON'T LIKE IT.
I JUST CALLED FUKU FOUR TIMES. NOBODY ANSWERED.
I DON'T DEAL WITH THE BULL[bleep].
I DON'T PUT UP WITH TASTINGS GOING WRONG
OR EMPLOYEES NOT ANSWERING THE PHONE.
I'M WATCHING THE VIDEO CAMERA,
AND ABSOLUTELY NOBODY IN THE RESTAURANT.
I SPY ON ALL OF MY EMPLOYEES AT EVERY RESTAURANT
ON MY PHONE, AND IF I SEE THAT THEY'RE MESSING AROUND,
I GO FROM ZERO TO PISSED.
- ♪ UNH UNH UNH UNH UNH ♪
♪ BACK, BACK, BACK ♪
♪ BACK, BACK AND FORTH WE GO ♪
- HI. HOW'S THE PHONE GOING?
HAD US ON HOLD FOR, LIKE, FIVE MINUTES.
LET'S CHECK THE KITCHEN.
WHAT IS THIS?
TRASH. - TRASH.
- SIX POINTS, HEALTH DEPARTMENT.
STARTING FROM A YOUNG AGE, I NEVER CARED
ABOUT BARBIES OR ANY OF THAT.
I CARED ABOUT MY LEMONADE STANDS
ON THE SIDEWALK, AND CRUSHING THE COMPETITION
ACROSS THE STREET.
OH, MY GOD, THIS MAKES ME JUST CRINGE.
IF WE HAVE SIX TO EIGHT DIFFERENT, UNIQUE SECRET SAUCES,
AND THEY SUCK, WE'RE GOING OUT OF BUSINESS.
THE THING THAT I THINK ABOUT THE MOST IS,
HOW DO I MAKE EVERYONE FORGET THAT I'M 100 POUNDS,
5'1", LOOK LIKE I'M 12, AND THAT I'M A WOMAN?
SO I HAVE TO BE TOUGH ALL THE TIME.
I DON'T WANT ANYBODY COMING IN HERE
AND THROWING TOGETHER WHATEVER THE HELL THAT IS.
LOOK AT THE FRICKIN' RECIPES.
- ♪ THERE'S A BEAUTIFUL DAY ♪
♪ HEADED YOUR WAY ♪
♪ KEEP YOUR HEAD UP, UP, UP ♪
♪ YOU'LL BE OKAY ♪
- I JUST SAW THE PLACEMENT THAT YOU DID
FOR JOEY HERE IN MY OFFICE,
AND I JUST WANTED TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT
ANOTHER CLIENT OF OURS.
I'M A PUBLICIST AT ONE OF THE BEST-KNOWN
PUBLIC RELATIONS AGENCIES IN LOS ANGELES.
MY JOB IS TO GET THE BEST PRESS POSSIBLE
FOR EVERY RESTAURANT AND EVERY CHEF THAT I REPRESENT.
RESTAURATEURS AND CHEFS HAVE INCREDIBLE EGOS,
AND IT'S NEVER ENOUGH.
IF YOU GET THEM ON THE COVER OF L.A. TIMES THIS WEEK,
NEXT WEEK THEY'RE GONNA BE ASKING YOU ABOUT L.A. MAGAZINE.
CIAO. BYE.
A FEW OF MY CLIENTS ARE EDWARD LEE,
WHO WAS ON TOP CHEF: TEXAS,
CANDACE NELSON, WHO IS THE FOUNDER OF SPRINKLES
AND PUBLIC KITCHEN & BAR IN THE HOLLYWOOD ROOSEVELT.
- HI, TIM. - WHAT'S UP, BRENDA?
- WE GOT PUBLIC INTO ANGELINO
TO DO A STORY ABOUT OYSTERS.
IT KIND OF POSITIONS THE RESTAURANT
AS WHERE TO GO FOR OYSTERS IN L.A.
- RIGHT. - DETAILS MAGAZINE...
WE'VE JUST PITCHED THE RESTAURANT AS ONE
OF THE SEXIEST HOTEL RESTAURANTS
IN THE COUNTRY. - NICE.
- UM...SO WHAT IS THIS DELICIOUSNESS?
- WATERMELON SALAD WITH TOMATO VINAIGRETTE.
- RIGHT UP YOUR ALLEY. LIGHT AND EASY.
- LIGHT AND EASY?
[laughs] - YEAH.
- I LOVE TO EAT.
BEING THE YOUNGEST OF FOUR CHILDREN,
I WAS A FOOD HOARDER.
I ACTUALLY REMEMBER HIDING FOOD IN THE SOFA
SO I COULD EAT IT LATER.
ONE TIME, ACCORDING TO MY BROTHER,
I HAD OVERALLS ON, AND I PULLED OUT A PIECE OF BACON
FROM MY FRONT POCKET AND STARTED CHEWING ON IT.
AND HE'S, LIKE, "WHERE DID YOU GET THAT?"
AND I SAID, "FROM BREAKFAST."
MM. I OBVIOUSLY HAVE TO HAVE THE POTATO.
'CAUSE GOD FORBID I DON'T EAT CARBOHYDRATES.
CAN I BE TEN POUNDS THINNER? ABSOLUTELY.
IT'S SO ABSURD, BECAUSE IN L.A., I'M THE BIG GIRL
WHEN ANYWHERE ELSE IN THE COUNTRY, I'M AVERAGE.
THIS IS SO AMAZING. - IT'S GOOD.
- HI. - HI. I KNEW YOU'D FIND ME.
- HELLO!
GOOD TO SEE YOU. - YOU LOOK CUTE.
YOU TOO. - THIS PLACE IS SO CUTE.
- THIS IS A CUTE LITTLE NEIGHBORHOOD
'CAUSE THEY HAVE CAFE GRATITUDE DOWN THE STREET.
AND WHAT'S NEXT DOOR? - SO THERE'S VENICE BEACH WINES,
AND THEN THIS, LICENSED FOR A FULL 47.
YOU KNOW ROSE IS THE NEXT ABBOT KINNEY.
- YOU'RE SO IN THE KNOW. - IT'S MY JOB.
- KAT IS A GOSSIP COLUMNIST FOR THE FOOD INDUSTRY.
SHE'S ESSENTIALLY THE "PAGE SIX" OF L.A. DINING.
FOR BETTER OR WORSE, KAT'S OPINION MATTERS,
AND SHE CAN MAKE OR BREAK A RESTAURANT HERE IN L.A.
- I'VE BEEN SO EXCITED TO COME HERE.
LIKE, I CAN'T EVEN TELL YOU.
AND I LOVE THAT IT'S A CLIENT OF YOURS.
- SO THIS IS OUR CUCUMBER SALAD.
THAT'S OUR BAY CITY'S PAN CON TOMATE.
CHEF IS PREPARING SOME MORE ITEMS.
- COOL. - HE'LL BE OUT SHORTLY.
- AWESOME. - I'LL BE BACK. ALL RIGHT.
- WHEN I MET KAT TWO YEARS AGO,
MY FIRST IMPRESSION WAS HIPSTER VALLEY GIRL
MEETS BLOGGER AND FOODIE.
SINCE THEN, NOT MUCH HAS CHANGED.
[laughs]
SO WHAT'S GOING ON? WHERE YOU COMING FROM?
- JEREMY FOX. DO YOU KNOW HIM AT ALL?
- UH-UH. - HE'S OPENING IN VENICE.
I WENT TO CHECK IT OUT-- IT'S CALLED BARNYARD.
- I HEARD ABOUT IT.
- HE GAVE ME A TOUR OF THE SPACE.
- MAYBE I HEARD ABOUT IT FROM YOU.
- MAYBE. [laughter]
- MY RELATIONSHIP WITH KAT IS COMPLICATED.
I NEED HER TO COVER MY RESTAURANTS.
SHE NEEDS ME FOR INSIDE SCOOP
ABOUT WHAT'S OPENING AND WHAT PROMOTIONS ARE HAPPENING.
IF KAT AND I DIDN'T WORK TOGETHER,
WOULD WE STILL BE FRIENDS?
IT'S HARD TO SAY.
- MM... - WHAT DO YOU THINK?
- THIS SUCKS!
- UGH.
NO. BUT I'VE GOT RESTAURANTS THAT WOULD FALL INTO THAT.
- OH, YEAH? WHICH ONES?
- RAY'S AND STARK BAR, PUBLIC KITCHEN & BAR,
MIRABELLE. - OKAY.
- THEY ARE LOOKING FOR P.R.
THEY JUST REFURBISHED THE INSIDE.
- I HAD SUCH AN ISSUE WITH THEIR FORMER P.R. PERSON.
- THEY MENTIONED YOU... - I--
- SPECIFICALLY SAYING THAT "EATER DID A REALLY, LIKE,
NASTY STORY ABOUT US."
- THE PLACE LOOKED LIKE A CRAZY GRANDMOTHER'S BEDROOM
WITH WEIRD [bleep] EVERYWHERE. LIKE, IT DOES.
- THE IDEA BEHIND THEIR DESIGN, THOUGH, IS LIKE
A WORLD TRAVELER GOES AROUND BRINGING BACK COLLECTIBLES
FROM AROUND THE WORLD-- - BUT HERE'S THE OTHER THING.
LIKE, I DIDN'T EVEN REALLY WRITE ANYTHING NEGATIVE.
- THEY SPECIFICALLY SAID-- - NO, I KNOW.
BUT IF YOU GO BACK AND READ THAT ARTICLE,
IT SAYS SOMETHING TO THE EXTENT OF
"MIRABELLE OFFERS A TASTE OF THE BIZARRE."
THAT'S ALL IT SAID.
THERE'S NOTHING NEGATIVE OTHER THAN THAT.
I'M VIEWED AS A TASTEMAKER, SO I KNOW THAT
I CAN'T PLEASE EVERYONE.
BUT I STAND BEHIND WHAT I WROTE FOR MIRABELLE.
I LIKE TO TELL IT AS IT IS. YOU KNOW WHAT?
LIKE, THERE'S WEIRD [bleep] IN THERE.
- KAT ALWAYS HAS GOOD INTENTIONS,
BUT THE ROAD TO HELL IS PAVED WITH GOOD INTENTIONS.
- COMING UP... - FOR DESSERT I DO, UM,
TOFU CHOCOLATE PUDDING.
[child screaming] SO I'M LEAVING THAT UP TO YOU.
[cheerful music]
- ♪ I LIKE TO MAKE SNOW ANGELS IN SUMMER ♪
- [speaks Spanish]
I WAS BORN IN ITALY AND RAISED IN NEW YORK CITY.
I PRETTY MUCH HAD THE BEST CHILDHOOD,
MY FATHER BEING PART OF THE ART WORLD.
AT A VERY YOUNG AGE, I WAS SURROUNDED BY
SOME OF THE MOST EPIC ARTISTS OF OUR TIME.
WHEN I MOVED TO L.A. AND I STARTED GOING
TO THE FARMERS MARKETS, I FOUND, AS AN ARTIST--
LIKE, I FELT LIKE I FOUND MY MEDIUM, MY PAINTS.
THANK YOU SO MUCH. BUH-BYE.
COULD I TASTE ONE OF THESE LITTLE ONES? NICE.
WHEN I FIRST STARTED COOKING, I DIDN'T HAVE
FORMAL TECHNICAL TRAINING.
I APPLIED TO A BUNCH OF RESTAURANTS.
OF COURSE, PEOPLE WEREN'T EVEN OPENING MY RESUME UP.
SO I WENT BACK OUT ON MY OWN.
THANK YOU. HAVE A GREAT DAY.
I STARTED CATERING SMALL EVENTS,
BOOKING JOBS,
PRETENDING I KNEW WHAT THE HELL I WAS DOING.
I DID A DINNER FOR SOME WONDERFUL FRIENDS OF MINE,
AND THE WEST COAST EDITOR OF VANITY FAIR
WAS AT THE DINNER, AND SUDDENLY
I WAS FEATURED AS A BRIGHT YOUNG THING IN VANITY FAIR.
AND THE NEXT DAY I JUST STARTED BOOKING WORK
AS A PRIVATE CHEF.
- WHAT TIME'S DINNER? - 6:15.
- FOR DESSERT I DO, UM, TOFU CHOCOLATE PUDDING.
I USE SILKEN TOFU, AND YOU BLEND IT
WITH THE MELTED CHOCOLATE, AND IT JUST BECOMES--
LIKE, ALL YOU TASTE IS CHOCOLATE,
AND IT'S PERFECTLY CREAMY.
SO I'M LEAVING THAT UP TO YOU.
- UH-UH. - GOOD TO KNOW. GOOD TO KNOW.
AS A PRIVATE CHEF, IT'S NOT ALWAYS ABOUT
SHOWCASING MY FOOD.
IT REALLY COMES DOWN TO PLEASING THE CLIENT.
I'M GONNA DO A LITTLE CRISPY BRANZINO.
I HAVE A REALLY BEAUTIFUL FILLET.
SO I'M GONNA GET TO IT. - OKAY.
- THANK YOU AGAIN, LAUREN.
- WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
- I'M MAKING YOU A DELICIOUS DINNER.
WHAT I REALLY WANT TO DO IS WORK TOWARDS
OPENING MY OWN RESTAURANT.
- [screams]
- I WANT TO BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY AS A CHEF.
NOT HALF CHEF, HALF MARY [bleep] POPPINS.
- EVERYBODY SIT DOWN.
WILL YOU TAKE FOUR MORE BITES OF POTATO?
- [sighs]
- I LIKE THIS SPACE. I JUST THINK IT'S
A REALLY THOUGHTFULLY DESIGNED RESTAURANT.
- I THINK THE ENVIRONMENT'S AMAZING.
- YOU KNOW, THEY'RE OPENING MORE.
I READ ABOUT IT ON EATER LAST WEEK.
- CAN WE PLEASE TALK ABOUT THAT GUY
THAT YOU MENTIONED THE OTHER DAY
THAT YOU WANT TO SET ME UP WITH, HARRY'S FRIEND?
WHAT WAS HIS NAME? - CHRIS.
HE'S CUTE. - [laughs]
- SO LET ME ASK YOU A QUESTION.
WHERE WAS THAT GUY WHEN YOU WERE SETTING ME UP
WITH THE 350-POUND CHEF?
WHY DON'T WE SET KAT UP WITH THE CHEF,
AND THEN SET ME UP WITH SOMEONE GOOD-LOOKING?
JESSICA HAS A CHEF THAT SHE WANTS TO SET ME UP WITH,
SO I GOOGLE HIM, AND HE'S EASILY OVER 300 POUNDS.
RE--REALLY?
- YOU TOLD ME, "I WANT A CHEF. I WANT HIM TO BE...
A LITTLE BIT BIGGER."
HE'S REALLY NICE.
BRENDA'S VERY SPECIFIC
IN THE TYPES OF GUYS THAT SHE LIKES.
AND I HIT EVERY SINGLE ITEM ON THAT CHECKLIST.
WEIGHT WAS NEVER ON THE CHECKLIST.
AND YOU KNOW WHAT? I HEAR HE'S ON A DIET.
- YOU KNOW WAYLYNN WAS ENGAGED TWICE?
SHE HAS TWO DIFFERENT WEDDING DRESSES IN HER CLOSET.
- SHUT UP. - WAS SHE A RUNAWAY BRIDE?
- UH-HUH.
IF YOU ASK ME, THAT'S SMARTER
BECAUSE I WENT THROUGH WITH THE WEDDING,
AND THEN GOT DIVORCED A YEAR LATER.
WHILE I WAS WORKING IN NEW YORK, I FELL IN LOVE AND GOT MARRIE,
AND A YEAR LATER I FELL IN HATE
AND GOT DIVORCED.
'CAUSE I BASICALLY CAME HOME AFTER I HAD A BUSINESS TRIP.
MY HUSBAND SAID HI TO THE DOG BEFORE HE SAID HI TO ME,
AND I WAS, LIKE, "SO YOU'RE SAYING HI TO THE DOG
BEFORE YOU SAY HI TO YOUR WIFE?"
AND HE GOES, "YOU JUST CAME BACK FROM A BUSINESS TRIP
AND YOU'RE LAYING INTO ME ALREADY?"
AND I WAS, LIKE, "AND I'M LEAVING YOU."
AND HE GOES, "OKAY." - EWW.
- THE NEXT MORNING I WOKE UP, I'M LIKE,
"DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING TO SAY NOW,
LIKE, NOW THAT YOU'VE SLEPT ON IT?"
HE GOES, "YEAH, ACTUALLY. GIVE ME MY RING BACK."
AND I GO, "LISTEN, YOU BORROWED MONEY,
"WHEN YOU WERE OUT OF WORK, FROM MY MOTHER'S INHERITANCE.
"HOW 'BOUT I GIVE YOU THE RING BACK,
"YOU SELL IT, AND THEN YOU PAY ME MY MOTHER'S INHERITANCE?
"I DON'T GIVE A [bleep] ABOUT THIS RING,
BUT YOU OWE ME MY MOTHER'S INHERITANCE BACK."
- 100% DEAD ON.
- AND HE SAID, "[bleep] YOU AND YOUR DEAD MOTHER [bleep]."
- [exaggerated gasp]
- MY DIVORCE WAS REALLY *** ME,
AND IT TOTALLY SHATTERED MY WORLD
AND WHAT I BELIEVED IN LOVE.
CHEERS TO THAT.
I SOMETIMES COME ACROSS AS A LITTLE HARSH,
BUT IT'S ME PROTECTING MYSELF,
AND KNOWING THAT MY LIFE EXPERIENCES
ARE KIND OF SPEAKING THROUGH ME NOW.
- WHAT THE HELL'S HE DOING NOW?
- HE'S LIVING HIS LIFE IN NEW YORK.
AND THEN YOU WONDER WHY, LIKE, I MOVED TO CALIFORNIA.
- AW, DEAR. WELL, THAT WAS A FUN LUNCH.
[hip-hop music playing] - ♪ OH, YEAH ♪
♪ COME ON, COME ON, HUH ♪
♪ LET'S PUMP IT UP SO FRESH ♪
♪ BUT LATELY... ♪
- NANCY AND I SET OUT TO OPEN THIS BUSINESS,
WANTING IT TO BE LIKE WE ARE WELCOMING PEOPLE
INTO OUR OWN HOME.
SO EVERY MORNING AT FONUTS, WE HAVE A DANCE PARTY.
EAT YOUR FONUT AND THEN DANCE OFF THE CALORIES AFTERWARDS.
[entrance bells chime]
- HOW ARE YOU?
- I HAVE A DELIVERY FOR WAYLYNN LUCAS.
- DID YOU ORDER THIS? - WHAT? NO. WHAT IS THIS?
THANK YOU. - THANK YOU. HAVE A GOOD DAY.
[entrance bells chime]
"JUST IN CASE YOU DIDN'T KNOW I HAD A CRUSH ON YOU."
IT'S GRAPE AND ORANGE.
HE MUST HAVE A PRETTY BIG CRUSH ON ME.
- I'VE NEVER SEEN ANYTHING LIKE IT.
THESE CUPS CAME FROM AN ADMIRER.
THAT'S NOT THAT BAD.
BUT THEN YOU GOT AN ANT FARM?
WHO GIVES A GIRL AN ANT FARM?
DID YOU SEE THE POETRY SHE GOT?
- NO. [laughter]
- "I WANT TO GET LOST IN YOUR MAGICAL HAIR."
SERIOUSLY? WHO'S IT FROM?
- OH, WOW. I'M PRETTY SURE
MY SECRET ADMIRER IS STEVEN ARROYO,
WHO DOES MAKE THE BEST TACOS IN ALL OF LOS ANGELES.
THAT'S AWESOME.
AND HIS PLACE CONVENIENTLY
HAPPENS TO BE LOCATED AROUND THE CORNER FROM FONUTS.
BUT IF HE WANTS TO GET MY ATTENTION,
HE'S ACTUALLY GOING TO HAVE TO WALK IN HERE
AND ASK ME OUT ON A DATE. [entrance bells chime]
OH, MY GOSH!
HI. - HOW ARE YOU?
- GOOD. HOW ARE YOU? - WHAT'S GOING ON?
WELCOME. - I NEVER BEEN HERE.
- ARE YOU THE TACO GUY?
- SEE? SEE? - I'M GOING THERE TODAY.
- AND YOU, WHEN ARE YOU COMING?
- I'LL SEE YOU SOON. THANK YOU AGAIN.
- YOU'RE WELCOME.
- IN DATING A CHEF, YOU'RE AGREEING TO DATE SOMEONE
WHO IS COMPLETELY SELFISH AND SELF-CENTERED
AND EGO-DRIVEN.
- YOU GUYS HAVE A GOOD THING HERE, HUH?
- IT'S A PRETTY GOOD THING. WE'RE ALL RIGHT WITH IT.
WE HAVE FUN WITH IT.
- MY EX-BOYFRIEND IS MICHAEL VOLTAGGIO.
HE WAS THE WINNER OF TOP CHEF SEASON 6.
HE'S, LIKE, THE BAD BOY ROCK STAR OF THE CHEF WORLD.
HE WOULD, LIKE, SCREAM AND YELL
AND SNAP ON A DIME.
THAT CARRIED OVER OUTSIDE OF THE KITCHEN,
AND THAT WASN'T SOMETHING THAT I COULD HAVE IN MY LIFE ANYMORE.
- THANKS FOR THE DOUGHNUT. - YOU'RE WELCOME.
STEVEN WAS VERY SWEET AND ADORABLE AND CUTE.
[entrance bells chime]
- HE'S A BIG BEAR. - [laughs]
SO SHOW ME THAT MAYBE HE'S NOT LIKE EVERY OTHER CHEF.
- OOH-OOH, FUZZY BEAR! [laughs]
- GREAT, NOW I GET TO GET MADE FUN OF ABOUT THIS FOREVER.
- ♪ UH-UH-OH, UH-UH-OH ♪
♪ WAKE UP EARLY IN THE MORNING ♪
♪ AND I'M WAITING FOR THE SUN TO RISE ♪
♪ THE STARS FADE AWAY ♪
- SO IS THE NEW STUFF ON HERE OR...
- OKAY, SO LET ME SAY... - COCKTAILS ARE NEW?
- COCKTAILS ARE AMAZING. - SPICED CUCUMBER COLLINS
IS MY FAVORITE.
THE LOBSTER'S NEW. - YEAH, SOME GOOD STUFF.
- BASICALLY, I AM A PROFESSIONAL DINER.
I EAT OUT SIX NIGHTS A WEEK.
MY OFFICE IS PRETTY MUCH EVERY RESTAURANT, NIGHTCLUB,
AND BAR IN L.A.
WORKING IN AN OFFICE 9:00 TO 5:00
WOULD FEEL LIKE WORK TO ME. [shudders]
I HAVE REALLY GOOD GOSSIP. THIS IS, LIKE, ACTUALLY,
SUPER ON THE D.L.
WE'RE NOT GONNA USE ANY NAMES.
A CHEF-- - WHO'S MARRIED.
- I GET A TEXT. IT SAYS, "I WANT YOU."
I WAS, LIKE, AH!
- NO WAY.
THANK YOU.
- YOU KNOW PABLO, THE MIXOLOGIST AT, LIKE,
LA DESCARGA, BLACK MARKET?
HE--I WENT OUT ON, LIKE, FAKE DATES WITH HIM.
FAKE IS THE WORD OF THE NIGHT, BY THE WAY.
FAKE DATES WITH HIM, UM--
- WHAT CONSTITUTES A FAKE DATE OVER A REAL DATE?
- HE THOUGHT IT WAS A DATE. I JUST THOUGHT WE WERE
BEING FRIENDS, AND WE WERE HANGING OUT.
OH, I FORGOT TO TELL YOU I'E BEEN FAKE DATING THIS OTHER GUY.
HE'S THE GM AT SON OF A GUN.
- I WOULD DESCRIBE KAT'S DATING LIFE AS VERY ACTIVE.
I WALK INTO A FOOD FESTIVAL AND SAY,
"OH, THAT CHEF'S CUTE," SHE'D BE, LIKE,
"OH, I HAD A THING WITH HIM."
SHE'S EITHER SAYING THAT SHE HAD
A DATING SITUATION WITH HIM, OR SHE'S SAYING,
"BACK OFF, AND YOU CAN'T LIKE HIM BECAUSE I DATED HIM."
SO EITHER WAY, I LOSE.
- I MADE OUT WITH THIS GUY, JOHN CARLO.
I GET VERY SPECIAL TREATMENT AT THE BAZAAR,
BECAUSE NOW JOHN CARLOS IS AT THE BAZAAR.
- [laughs]
- SO LITERALLY, THEY ROLL OUT THE RED CARPET
WHEN I GO TO THE BAZAAR.
- BUT DO YOU THINK IT'S BECAUSE
OF WHO YOU HOOKED UP WITH OR WHO YOU WRITE FOR?
- BOTH.
AT THE END OF THE DAY, IT'S BUSINESS,
AND I DO LIKE TO KEEP IT PROFESSIONAL,
BUT YOU MEET CUTE GUYS AT ANY JOB YOU HAVE.
AND SO SOMETIMES I MEET ATTRACTIVE GUYS
IN MY LINE OF WORK AS WELL,
AND IF FLIRTING HAPPENS, IT HAPPENS.
- CAN I JUST PUT IT OUT THERE THAT YOU WOULDN'T BE ABLE
TO DO YOUR JOB IF YOU COULDN'T GO BACK TO PLACES
WHERE YOU MADE OUT WITH PEOPLE.
KAT HAS A REPUTATION OF SLEEPING WITH EVERYONE
SHE WRITES ABOUT, AND WRITING ABOUT
EVERYONE SHE SLEEPS WITH.
IT'S TRUE.
- SO ANYWAY, SB, MIRKO PADERNO TRIED
TO TAKE ME OUT ON A DATE, AND, LIKE,
SLASH-STALK ME FOR A WHILE,
SO DON'T GO THERE ANYMORE.
- COMING UP... - WHAT DO YOU DO?
- I'M A PRIVATE CHEF, CATERER.
- DO YOU HAVE A CARD? - YEAH, I GOT A CARD, MAN.
- I'M NOT QUITE SURE IF IT'S THE BEST IDEA
TO BE GOING TO THE RESTAURANT OF MY SECRET ADMIRER.
BRAVO.
- ♪ YOU MADE ME FEEL OH, SO SPECIAL ♪
♪ ♪
- QUITE HONESTLY, I'M SO HAPPY TO HANG OUT
WITH SOME, LIKE, BADASS *** IN L.A.,
WHICH ARE KIND OF HARD TO COME BY.
SO CHEERS. ANOTHER ROUND.
- THAT ONE'S REALLY, REALLY, REALLY GOOD.
- MMM. THAT WAS SO GOOD.
- I WOULD THROW MY MOTHER DOWN A FLIGHT OF STAIRS FOR THAT.
[laughter]
- I NEED TO COMMENT IT'S SO REFRESHING TO EAT
WITH A BUNCH OF GIRLS THAT EAT A LOT OF FOOD.
'CAUSE I FEEL LIKE SO MANY [bleep] GIRLS IN L.A.
DON'T EAT. - WHO ARE YOU TELLING?
- WELL, I DIDN'T EAT ALL DAY SO I COULD EAT DINNER.
[laughter]
- IF I DON'T EAT CARBS, I BECOME, LIKE, EMACIATED.
- YOU'RE, LIKE, THIS BIG ALREADY.
HOW DO YOU GET SMALLER? - HAVE YOU SEEN MY ***?
EXCUSE ME, I GOT A LITTLE BIT-- A LITTLE WEIGHT.
- NINA IS THAT SKINNY GIRL THAT EVERY GIRL
THAT HAS TEN POUNDS ON THEM HATES.
- HEY.
WHAT'S GOING ON?
- DELICIOUS. - WHAT'S HAPPENING?
- COME AND JOIN US.
WE HAVE AN EXTRA SEAT HERE. - SURE DO.
- NOT QUITE SURE IF IT'S THE BEST IDEA
TO BE GOING TO THE RESTAURANT OF MY SECRET ADMIRER.
I DEFINITELY HOPE I'M NOT GIVING THE WRONG IMPRESSION
BY GOING IN THERE, BUT I REALLY JUST [bleep] LIKE THE TACOS!
ALL DAY LONG. - YOU NEED HELP?
- BRING IT.
- HERE, JUST FEEL THAT.
- FEEL WHAT?
HEY... [laughter]
- [mouths words] - MIXING ARM.
- I'M A PRIVATE CHEF, CATERER.
- DO YOU HAVE A CARD? - YEAH, I GOT A CARD, MAN.
OF COURSE. - IN CASE I THROW A PARTY.
- THERE YOU GO. - LIKE A PRIVATE PARTY.
IT'S SO PRIVATE IT'S JUST YOU AND I.
- BRAVO.
SITTING THERE AND WATCHING HIM FLIRTING WITH ME
AND THEN FLIRTING WITH THE OTHER GIRLS
IN THIS SCHMOOZY BAD-BOY WAY,
HE EMBODIES COMPLETELY 100% OF THE GUY
I DON'T EVER, EVER, EVER WANT TO DATE EVER AGAIN.
- I'M NOT EVEN PLAYING. YOU SHOULD TAKE SOME OF MY STUFF.
- NO, THANK YOU. NO WAY.
I WANT NO PART OF THAT.
- ON THAT NOTE.
- CHEF GREENSPAN, NINA CLEMENTE.
- AH, NINA, HOW ARE YOU? - I'M SO GOOD.
- COME ON IN. HAVE A SEAT. - THANK YOU.
I'M 30 AND, YOU KNOW, LIKE, NEXT THING I KNOW,
I COULD BLINK, AND I'VE BEEN IN L.A. FOR 30 YEARS
AND I STILL HAVEN'T DONE [bleep].
SO IF I WANT TO OWN MY OWN RESTAURANT ONE DAY,
I NEED TO GET EXPERIENCE IN A REAL KITCHEN.
SO I'M HERE BECAUSE I'D REALLY LOVE,
IF YOU'D BE WILLING, TO COME AND STAGE,
PERHAPS A COUPLE OF DAYS A WEEK WITH YOU?
STAGING IS LABOR IN EXCHANGE FOR KNOWLEDGE.
SO WORKING FOR FREE.
I DON'T HAVE TECHNICAL TRAINING. - RIGHT.
I, UM--NO.
THAT'S REALLY WHY I'M HERE BECAUSE...
I'M A FIEND FOR KNOWLEDGE, SO...
- WE CAN ALWAYS USE AN EXTRA HAND.
WE'RE ALWAYS GETTING SLAMMED. - I DEFINITELY AM
ON THE SLOWER END OF THINGS.
- WE'LL GET YOU MOVING REAL QUICK.
- [laughs] - IT SOUNDS GREAT.
WHY DON'T WE START TODAY?
- I'M AT A POINT IN MY CAREER WHERE
THE MORE I WORK, THE BETTER.
I DON'T HAVE PRESS. I DON'T HAVE P.R. OUT THERE.
I DON'T HAVE A WHOLE CREW WORKING TO PROMOTE ME
TO GET ME WORK.
SO HAVING THIS OPPORTUNITY IS NOT GONNA BE TAKEN LIGHTLY.
- WANT ME TO SHOW YOU AROUND? - I'D LOVE TO--
I'D LOVE TO CHECK OUT THE SPACE.
- FOLLOW ME.
- ♪ THE SKY'S THE LIMIT ♪
♪ SO COME ON AND GET IT ♪
♪ LET ME HELP YOU, SPIN MY HEAD ♪
- HI. - HI.
- HOW ARE YOU, KAT? - I AM DOING WELL. HOW ARE YOU?
- GOOD. - GOOD TO SEE YOU.
- I'M GLAD YOU'RE HERE.
- JOHN TERZIAN IS KIND OF A BIG DEAL IN L.A.
ALL OF JOHN'S VENUES ALWAYS CATER TO CELEBRITIES.
KIND OF LIKE THE PLACE YOU WANT TO GET IN,
BUT PROBABLY CAN'T GET IN.
BUT I CAN.
- THIS IS THE MAJOR TABLE.
- THAT'S, LIKE, THE BALLER TABLE?
IF YOU COME HERE AND YOU'RE SAT HERE,
IT'S, LIKE, GAME ON. - THIS IS WHERE YOU WOULD SIT.
- EATER IS KNOWN FOR BREAKING NEWS FIRST,
ALWAYS GETTING THE FIRST SCOOPS.
IT'S A CUTTHROAT BUSINESS, AND IF JOHN IS GONNA
GIVE ME A SCOOP, I'M GONNA TAKE IT.
VERY COOL. - YOU WANNA HAVE A DRINK?
- WE SHOULD DEFINITELY HAVE A DRINK.
- CHEERS. - CHEERS.
- WE ARE LOOKING TO DO MORE SHOREBARS.
WE'RE LOOKING AT TWO HOTEL ROOFTOPS RIGHT NOW DOWNTOWN.
- OH, REALLY? - YEAH.
- WHICH ONES? - THEY ARE, UH...
- NOT, LIKE, THE ACE OR THE KING & GROVE?
- WE'RE LOOKING AT THOSE-- - [laughs]
THOSE ONES.
WOW, YOU ARE ON THE IN.
- DID I GET THE SCOOP ON THAT?
- YES. - [laughs]
L.A. IS A VERY FLIRTY TOWN, AND, HEY,
IF I CAN SMILE AND GET THE SCOOP OVER SOMEONE ELSE, I'LL DO IT.
DO YOU NEED TO TAKE CARE OF BUSINESS?
- AW, SOON. YOU'RE MORE IMPORTANT.
- THANK YOU.
- WHAT ARE YOUR PLANS AFTER THIS?
- I'M GONNA HAVE YOU LEARN A COUPLE DISHES ON [indistinct].
- SURE. - SO THOSE'LL BE YOURS.
AND THEN, TOWARDS THE END OF THE SERVICE,
YOU'RE GONNA HELP SHAWN HERE
PLATE SOME OF THE HOT PORTIONS AS WELL.
- OKAY.
BEAUTIFUL.
THE KITCHEN IS A PERFECT BLEND
OF A MEN'S LOCKER ROOM...
- LET'S FLUSH OUR TOILET BEFORE WE TAKE ANOTHER POO, OKAY?
AND A FINE ARTS CLASS. - TUNA!
- IT'S AS GRUNGY, GRIMY, DIRTY AS IT GETS,
BUT THEN YOU HAVE THIS, LIKE, PERFECTION
WHEN IT COMES TO THE FOOD.
THE LAST TIME I WAS IN A KITCHEN LIKE THIS
WAS ABOUT A YEAR AGO,
SO I'M DEFINITELY FEELING A LITTLE BIT RUSTY.
- ONE MUSSELS WITH CANNELLONI,
ONE ROMAINE, YES? - YES, CHEF.
- POTATO SOUP. - YES, CHEF.
- I NEED BREAD FOR TWO, PLEASE. - BREAD FOR TWO, CHEF.
CHEF GREENSPAN IS DEFINITELY THROWING
AS MUCH AS HE CAN AT ME, BUT I'M JUST KNOCKIN' 'EM BACK.
- NICE.
- CHEF, DO YOU APPROVE OF MY FIRST TERRINE?
- NO. START OVER. THE PROBLEM IS THIS.
ONLY A LITTLE BIT OF IT'S THE MEAT.
THEY COME FOR THE MEAT.
YOU GOTTA SEE THINGS THROUGH, GIRL.
- YES, CHEF. - THE SHRIMP.
CHEF'S GONNA MAKE ONE TARTARE RIGHT NOW.
YOU'RE MAKING THE NEXT ONE. YES? - YES, CHEF.
- NOW, HERE'S THE DEAL. YOU PUT SOMETHING ON A PLATE,
AND IT TAKES JUST AS MUCH TIME TO PUT IT ON THE PLATE RIGHT
AS IT DOES TO PUT IT ON WRONG.
YOU GOTTA MAKE IT PRETTY AND FAST. YES?
- YES.
IF I MESS UP AS A PRIVATE CHEF,
IT JUST COMES DOWN ON ME, WHICH I CAN DEAL WITH.
THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT, CHAVEZ!
- BUT BEING IN THIS KITCHEN, ALL I CAN THINK ABOUT
IS I JUST NEED TO KEEP THE [bleep] UP.
UM, NO. - [bleep].
- I THOUGHT ABOUT IT TOO AT A CERTAIN POINT.
I WAS, LIKE, "OH, [bleep]."
ARE THEY TOO THIN? - YEAH.
HEY, HEY. - YES, CHEF.
- BIG [bleep] UP. - I KNOW. I KNOW.
- I WANNA TALK TO YOU.
BIG [bleep] UP. - YEAH.
- YES, YOU'RE HERE FOR FREE,
BUT THE KITCHEN IS A WHEEL.
ONE COG SLIPS UP, EVERYTHING MESSES UP.
CHEF'S GOTTA GET OUT OF THE RHYTHM TO FIX IT.
YOU'VE GOT TO MAINTAIN YOUR FOCUS
FROM BEGINNING TO END.
- WILL NOT HAPPEN AGAIN, CHEF.
- AT THE SAME TIME, THIS IS NOT THE EASIEST KITCHEN TO WORK IN.
YOU SEEM LIKE YOU'RE PICKING THINGS UP.
- THANK YOU. - LEARNING?
- LEARNING A LOT. - KEEP LEARNING.
- THANK YOU, CHEF. APPRECIATE IT.
- I LOOK FORWARD TO HAVING YOU BACK.
- COOL. PERHAPS I HAVE NOT EARNED
MY STRIPES YET WITHIN THE CULINARY WORLD,
BUT CHEF GREENSPAN TOLD ME TO COME BACK.
THAT WAS THE GREATEST HONOR THAT I COULD HAVE HAD.
- NOW GO HELP THE BOYS CLEAN UP.
- ♪ DAYBREAK ♪
♪ YOU'RE STILL STANDING ♪
[doorbell rings]
- HI. - HELLO
- BRENDA'S BIRTHDAY IS COMING UP.
- OKAY, WAIT, WHATEVER WE'RE GONNA DO,
WE HAVE TO DO SOMETHING.
- I CONSIDER BRENDA A GOOD FRIEND OF MINE,
AND I REAL WANT HER TO HAVE A NICE BIRTHDAY.
THE LAST TIME BRENDA HAD A REALLY BIG BIRTHDAY
WAS FOR HER 30TH, WHICH WAS
DEFINITELY QUITE A WHILE AGO.
- I FEEL LIKE SHE WANTS SOMETHING BIG.
LIKE A SURPRISE? - YEAH.
WE SHOULD DO IT AS A SURPRISE.
I THINK WE SHOULD TOTALLY DO IT AS A SURPRISE.
[laughter]
- OH, MY GOD, DO WE NEED WALKIE-TALKIES?
- DO YOU HAVE THEM? WHERE DO WE GET THEM?
I DON'T KNOW HOW TO USE THEM. - I CAN SO GET WALKIE-TALKIES.
- OKAY, PERFECT. - I JUST WANT A CODE NAME.
THE SECOND I MET KAT, ABOUT THREE YEARS AGO
AT AN EATER EVENT,
I KNEW THAT WE WERE DESTINED TO BE TWINS
SEPARATED AT BIRTH.
- SURPRISE! - TOTALLY. TOTALLY. TOTALLY.
- I'M A TOTAL CONTROL FREAK WHEN IT COMES TO PLANNING PARTIE,
ANY EVENT.
I'VE DONE A LITTLE MERMAID BIRTHDAY PARTY,
I'VE DONE MOVIE-THEMED BIRTHDAY PARTIES.
BACK IN MY SORORITY DAYS I DID TENNIS PROS,
SECRETARY HOS BACK IN MY TRI DELTA DAYS. OOH, OOH!
- I WAS THINKING OF SHOREBAR, WHICH IS WHERE
I HUNG OUT WITH JOHN. - I WANT TO GO THERE. PERFECT.
- SHOULD I ASK HIM? - YEAH.
WHAT AM I EATING?
- CUP NOODLES. - IT'S REALLY GOOD.
- IT'S REALLY GOOD, RIGHT? - IT'S REALLY GOOD.
- YEAH, IT'S HEALTHY TOO. OKAY...
THANK YOU. [phone chimes]
OH, HE WROTE BACK. - WHAT'D HE SAY?
- I'M, LIKE, NERVOUS. - TELL ME WHAT HE SAID.
TELL ME. - "HI."
- NO! - [laughs]
I MEAN-- - ALL RIGHT, FIRST OF ALL,
TWO "I"s, WHICH MEANS IT'S A NICE HI.
- DON'T EVEN TYPE BECAUSE THEN HE'LL KNOW I'M TYPING.
[phone chimes] - OH, MY GOSH! "VERY COOL."
WE GOT A "VERY COOL."
- MY PERSONALITY IS TWOFOLD.
I'M EITHER REALLY SHY OR REALLY OUTGOING.
AND WHEN IT COMES TO WORK, I'M REALLY OUTGOING
AND DEFINITELY MORE AGGRESSIVE.
BUT WHEN IT COMES TO MY PERSONAL LIFE,
ESPECIALLY IF I'M WITH A GUY THAT I LIKE,
I GET REALLY SHY AND, LIKE, DO THIS.
HE'S SO CUTE, THOUGH.
YOU CAN TELL IF I LIKE SOMEONE,
BECAUSE MY ENTIRE PERSONALITY WILL CHANGE.
[laughs]
- COMING UP... - ARE YOU NOT DATING
FOUR OR FIVE GUYS RIGHT NOW?
- OH, MY GOD, THIS IS THE *** BLOCK HEARD 'ROUND THE WORLD.
- THAT WAS SO GOOD. THAT TRUFFLE BURGER WAS
LIKE MOUTH SEX, THE CHIPS WERE REALLY GOOD.
- THAT WAS AMAZING.
- THESE ARE LIKE CHURRO DOUGHNUTS.
OH, MY GOD, THAT'S SO GOOD.
- OKAY, WAIT, WHAT DO YOU LIKE BETTER?
THIS IS SO GOOD.
- IT'S A DIFFERENT ANIMAL. IT'S A DIFFERENT ANIMAL.
THIS IS, LIKE, HOT, MUSHY DOUGH
WITH BANANA CREME SEX.
FONUTS IS LIKE ORAL SEX, AND THIS IS LIKE--
- WHAT? - WHAT IS IT? WHAT?
[both sigh and laugh]
- ♪ AH, AH, BABY, YOU'RE SUCH A DELIGHT ♪
♪ I GOT A ONE-WAY TICKET ♪ - HI.
OH, ARE YOU OUR BARTENDER?
- I AM. - OH, GOOD.
IT'S A SURPRISE PARTY.
I MADE HER A BIRTHDAY TIARA.
I KNOW, RIGHT?
AND GUESS WHAT THE CARD SAYS.
"WANTED TO MAKE SURE YOU HAD A SHORE THING ON YOUR BIRTHDAY."
GET IT? - SHOREBAR.
- BRENDA'S BEEN THROUGH SOME [bleep],
SO I WANT TO SHOW HER A GOOD TIME
FOR HER BIRTHDAY [bleep].
OH, I LIKE IT VERY MUCH.
GOOD. KEEP IT UP. NICE WORK.
[pop music]
- ♪ BABY, YEAH ♪
[knock on door]
[both shrieking]
- THIS IS WHITNEY. THIS IS KAT.
- HI. WELCOME. - YOU LOOK SO CUTE.
PARTY DRESSES!
- HAPPY BIRTHDAY! - WHOO!
- YOU CAN LET IT OUT. ALL GOOD.
WE'RE CELEBRATING YOUR 21ST BIRTHDAY,
WE'VE BEEN TELLING YOU THAT. - YES.
- NOW THAT I'M CLOSER TO 40 THAN I AM TO 30,
I HAVE SOME HIGH EXPECTATIONS FOR MYSELF THIS YEAR.
I HOPE TO WORK OUT A LITTLE MORE,
MAYBE DRINK A LITTLE LESS.
AND MOST IMPORTANTLY, I HOPE TO FALL IN LOVE.
- MAY I OFFER YOU SOME MORE? - OH, THANK YOU.
PLEASE DON'T LET ME DRINK TILL I BLACK OUT.
[laughter]
- OKAY, ALL RIGHT. UM, ARE WE GOOD? GOT IT?
[shouting and laughing]
- JESS SAID THAT WE SHOULD MEET HER AT SHOREBAR.
- IF JESS IS HERE, I'M GONNA DRY HUMP HER.
- DUDE, REALLY. YOU'RE HILARIOUS.
- I'M NOT DRINKING ANYMORE TONIGHT.
- [laughs] - I PROBABLY SHOULD HAVE
WATCHED BRENDA'S ALCOHOL CONSUMPTION
A LITTLE BIT MORE CLOSELY
BECAUSE SHE'S ALREADY SLURRING HER SPEECH,
AND SHE HAS NO IDEA WHAT SHE'S IN FOR TONIGHT.
- SHE'S IN THE HOSPITAL RIGHT NOW?
- SHE GOES FROM SOBER TO DRUNK IN, LIKE, .3 SECONDS.
- I--I'M...RESPECTABLE.
[belches, laughter]
I'M SO SORRY.
- WE'RE FOLLOWING YOU, KAT ODELL
- ALL RIGHT. - OR ME.
all: SURPRISE!
[cheers and applause]
- YOU GUYS ARE [bleep]!
SURPRISE! I'M DRUNK!
HI, GUYS, HI.
I NEED A DRINK.
HI. - HI!
HOW ARE YOU?
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, LADY. - HI, WAYLYNN.
I THOUGHT YOU WERE WORKING. - I WOULDN'T MISS THIS.
COME ON. - HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
- HEY, GUYS, WE'VE GOT THE ROOM UPSTAIRS,
SO IF YOU GUYS WANNA JUST-- WE CAN HEAD ON UP.
- HI. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR MAKING THIS HAPPEN, BY THE WAY.
- OF COURSE. YOU GOT THIS. - YEAH.
- IT DOES NOT SURPRISE ME THAT KAT WOULD THROW
BRENDA'S SURPRISE PARTY AT A BAR
WHERE SHE WANTS TO GET TO KNOW THE BUSINESS OWNER
A LITTLE BIT MORE.
'CAUSE IT MAY BE A LITTLE SELFISH TO, LIKE,
MAKE BRENDA'S BIRTHDAY PARTY ABOUT HER,
AND SO SHE CAN GET SOME PERSONAL GAIN OUT OF IT? MAYBE.
- ARE YOU STAYING DOWN HERE OR ARE YOU COMING UPSTAIRS?
- NO, I'LL GO UP. YEAH. - YOU'LL COME UP? OKAY.
- OH, MY GOD! - YAY!
- EVER! OH, MY GOD!
- YOU GUYS, WAYLYNN MADE THE CAKE.
GRAB A SEAT.
- YOU NEED A DRINK. - YES, SHE DOES.
- HE'S MAKING THE BIRTHDAY SPECIAL.
CHEERS! all: CHEERS!
- HAPPY BIRTHDAY. - THANK YOU FOR COMING.
- I JUST WANTED TO GIVE YOU THE GIFT OF MEAT.
- OH, THAT'S SO NICE OF YOU.
- YES, THESE ARE HANDMADE SAUSAGES,
MADE IN CHRIS' KITCHEN FOR YOU.
- THAT'S A [bleep] SPECIAL ***
YOU'RE WORKING WITH RIGHT THERE.
- YOU SHOULD TRY HIS BUNS. [laughter]
- I'VE NEVER BEEN GIVEN A PACK OF SAUSAGES
FOR MY BIRTHDAY, OR ANY OTHER OCCASION, FOR THAT MATTER.
WEIRD.
THESE ARE--THESE ARE SPECIAL. THANK YOU.
- YES. - HERE'S YOUR BIRTHDAY CROWN.
- YAY!
[indistinct chatter]
- YAY!
- IT'S BEAUTIFUL.
- KAT AND I GOT YOU-- - THIS PRESENT.
- IT LOOKS LIKE A POT. - IT'S IN THE POT.
- AAAH! HA!
- WHAT'S IN THERE? I CAN'T SEE.
- AAH!
[laughter]
- FANCY VIBRATOR. - THAT'S SO AMAZING.
HEY, YOU GUYS THOUGHT OF ME FOR THAT AMAZINGNESS.
- IT'S VERY EXPENSIVE.
- YEAH, THAT'S SO UNCOMFORTABLE FOR ME.
- GETTING THE GIFT OF A *** IMPLIES THAT YOU DON'T HAVE
A REAL *** ON-HAND TO USE,
WHICH THEN WHICH IMPLIES THAT YOU'RE SINGLE.
- AGAIN, I JUST GOT YOU SAUSAGE.
THERE IS NO--NO... - THAT'S THE REAL THING.
- NO INNUENDOS VEILED IN WHAT I GOT YOU.
- WHY HAS THIS BECOME, LIKE, A BACHELORETTE PARTY?
LIKE, IT'S MY BIRTHDAY! - YEAH!
- SPECIAL. [laughter]
CAN I TAKE THIS OFF NOW? OW.
- HEY. - HOW ARE YOU?
- I AM WELL. HOW ARE YOU?
- GOT A LITTLE PARTY OVER HERE?
- YEAH. INTERESTING.
- WHOSE BIRTHDAY IS IT TONIGHT? - IT'S BRENDA'S BIRTHDAY.
- THIS ONE RIGHT HERE. - WOW. HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BRENDA.
- YAY. - BRENDA, THIS IS JOHN.
- HI, SO NICE TO SEE YOU. - GOOD TO SEE YOU.
- LET'S PLAY TRUTH OR DARE.
- OH, MY GOD, NINA, LET'S TOTALLY PLAY.
- WAYLYNN, TRUTH OR DARE?
- I DON'T WANNA PLAY THIS GAME. [laughter]
COME ON, NINA. IN NO WAY, SHAPE, OR FORM,
AS A GROWN-*** WOMAN,
AM I PLAYING TRUTH OR DARE AT A BAR.
I WOULD HAVE RATHER TIED CINDER BLOCKS
AROUND MY ANKLES AND WALKED DOWN TO THE OCEAN,
NEVER TO RETURN.
- ALL RIGHT, [bleep], MAN.
BRENDA, TRUTH OR DARE?
- DARE. - THAT'S GOOD.
RIGHT ANSWER. GOOD ANSWER. - YAY!
- ALL RIGHT, LET'S CATCH A LITTLE PHYSICALITY
BETWEEN THE TWO OF YOU IN THE CORNER, BIRTHDAY GIRL.
- WHOA! [overlapping gasps, laughter]
- I AM SHOCKED.
- I FEEL LIKE I JUST WON THE GAME.
- NOT REALLY.
- NINA...
TRUTH OR DARE? - TRUTH.
- HOW DO YOU REALLY FEEL ABOUT KAT ODELL?
- I LIKE KAT. SHE'S MY HOMIE.
- THAT'S SO BORING. - [chuckles]
- ARE YOU GUYS FRIENDS?
- OOH.
- YES. - NOW THE TRUTH GETS JUICY!
- OF COURSE WE ARE.
- I HATE YOU.
- YOU COULD LITERALLY CUT THE TENSION
WITH A FRICKIN' BUTTER KNIFE.
- YOU GIVE KAT A TRUTH OR DARE. IT'S YOUR BIRTHDAY.
- I DON'T WANT TO PLAY. - KAT, TRUTH OR DARE?
- TRUTH.
- ARE YOU NOT DATING
FOUR OR FIVE GUYS RIGHT NOW?
- OH, MY GOD. THIS IS THE *** BLOCK HEARD 'ROUND THE WORLD.
- THIS HAS GOTTEN REALLY AWKWARD.
- DID YOU EVER HAVE ONE OF THOSE MOMENTS
THAT SOMETHING SHOULD JUST STAY IN UR HEAD,
AND AS IT'S COMING OUT OF YOUR MOUTH,
YOU'RE, LIKE-- UHH--UHH--UHH.
YEAH, THAT JUST HAPPENED.
I'M THE [bleep]HOLE IN THE ROOM.
- COMING UP... - YOU'VE GOTTA DO SOME MAJOR--
- WHAT DO I SAY TO-- I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY--
- MAJOR DAMAGE CONTROL OF WHAT JUST HAPPENED.
- WHILE IT WAS INAPPROPRIATE, YOU'VE GOTTA DO
SOME MAJOR-- - I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY--
MAJOR DAMAGE CONTROL OF WHAT JUST HAPPENED.
- OKAY. I CAN'T BELIEVE BRENDA SAID THAT
IN FRONT OF JOHN.
- THANK YOU, GOOD NIGHT!
- I WANT TO STRANGLE HER.
IT'S LIKE THE WORST POSSIBLE THING
SHE COULD, LIKE-- - EVER!
- OUT OF EVERYTHING SHE COULD HAVE SAID--
LIKE, AND SHE KNOWS THAT I LIKE HIM.
AND NOW HE'S GONNA [bleep] THINK I'M DATING SOMEONE ELSE.
OH, MY GOD.
- I'M THE [bleep]HOLE IN THE ROOM.
- NO, YOU'RE NOT. - WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
[all shouting at once]
- YOU CAN'T BE THE [bleep]HOLE.
- I'M ALLOWED TO BE THE [bleep]HOLE.
- ALL RIGHT, LET'S JUST GO OUTSIDE.
- HI. - HEY.
- I'M SORRY, LIKE, EVERYTHING WAS, LIKE, WEIRD UPSTAIRS.
AND I'M, LIKE--
THE FACT THAT I'M EVEN TALKING TO YOU ABOUT THIS--
UM, I WOULD LOVE TO HANG OUT WITH YOU.
- KEEP GOING.
- NO, THAT'S IT.
THAT'S ALL I HAVE TO SAY.
LIKE, I'M DONE.
SO, THAT'S--
- LET'S SAY YOU OWE ME A NIGHT
AT THE BOILING CRAB OR ONE OF THE--
- YEAH, I KNOW, I KNOW.
- RESTAURANTS THAT YOU LIKE NOW.
- I KNOW. IT'D BE REALLY FUN.
- YOU'RE LEAVING? - IT'S BEDTIME.
- ALL RIGHT. HERE, GIVE ME A HUG.
- BIRTHDAY GIRL. - BYE.
- YOU JUST GO HOME AND HAVE A GOOD TIME
WITH ANY OF THE SAUSAGES YOU RECEIVE TONIGHT.
- THESE STAIRS ARE A [bleep] DOOZY.
- UHH! I'M ABOUT TO FALL ON MY FACE.
- [laughs]
[thudding]
- OH! - OH, THERE YOU GO!
- HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
- OH, I LOVE YOU.
- OKAY, WHO'S IN CHARGE OF GETTING YOU HOME?
NOT HIM.
- I WAS IMMEDIATELY DISMISSED.
I LIKE HOW THAT HAPPENED.
- I'M TAKING HIM HOME.
- HOW DO PEOPLE IN L.A. ASK FOR NUMBERS?
- THEY JUST ASK. - OH. OKAY, GOOD.
- COULD WE GO HOME?
I WANT TO GO-- I WANT TO GO HOME.
- OH, MY GOD. [laughs]
BECAUSE THERE'S SO FEW WOMEN THAT WORK IN THE FOOD INDUSTRY,
WE'VE BECOME A VERY CLOSE-KNIT LITTLE COMMUNITY.
WE NEED EACH OTHER FOR OUR JOBS.
SOMETIMES IT DOES GET CATTY.
IT DOES GET COMPETITIVE.
BUT THAT'S KIND OF HOW IT GOES.
COME ON IN, SISTAH.
- ♪ I'M MOVIN' ON ♪
♪ I'M MOVIN' ON ♪
- THIS SEASON ON EAT, DRINK, LOVE...
- THIS WINE MAKES ME MOIST IN PLACES
THAT WE SHOULDN'T DISCUSS AT DINNER.
- [laughs]
- THREE CHEERS! - HERE WE GO!
- WHOO! - AAH!
[laughter]
- ♪ SAY OOH LA LA ♪
- WE NEED SOME MORE SORBET, GUYS.
LET'S DO THIS.
- THIS BETTER BE THE BEST THING
I'VE EVER HAD IN MY MOUTH
IN THE PAST 24 HOURS.
- [laughs]
- THAT WAS FUN, WASN'T IT?
- ♪ COME ON, Y'ALL ♪
- I HEARD YOU HAD DRINKS WITH BRENDA.
- GOTTA STAY ON HER GOOD SIDE, YOU KNOW?
- FOR NOW.
- AFTER TODAY, MAYBE NOT. - [laughs]
- PEOPLE AUTOMATICALLY ASSUE THAT IF YOU WRITE ABOUT SOMEONE,
YOU'RE [bleep] THEM.
- SO I SORT OF HAVE THIS LITTLE CHEF THING.
[laughs] - SORRY.
- SHUT UP.
- I DON'T KNOW MANY PEOPLE WHO WOULD DO THIS.
- DOES THAT MAKE ME BRAVE OR FOOLISH?
- BRAVE.
[to tune of Bridal Chorus] - ♪ DUN DUN DUN DUN ♪
- IT'S PRETTY. OH!
- HI, EVERYBODY. I'M LINDSAY.
all: HI, LINDSAY.
- I WANT YOU TO STAY OUT OF MY LIFE!
- I DON'T GIVE A [bleep] ABOUT YOUR LIFE, BRENDA!
- SHE WRITES FOR A LIVING.
SHE CAN'T EVEN GET THE [bleep] STORY STRAIGHT.
- MY WHOLE TEAM STABBED ME IN MY BACK.
I'M DONE HERE.
- TOMORROW COULD MAKE OR BREAK MY CAREER.
- YOU WANT TO GO THERE, I WILL [bleep] GO THERE.
- THAT'S THE LAST [bleep] I NEED RIGHT NOW!
GET THAT OUT OF MY MOTHER [bleep] FACE!
I'M NOT EVEN [bleep] KIDDING!
- FOR MORE INFORMATION ON EAT, DRINK, LOVE,
GO TO BRAVOTV.COM.