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- BACK IN OCTOBER, OUR GOVERNMENT WAS SHUT DOWN
FOR 16 DAYS.
IF THERE ARE 384 HOURS IN 16 DAYS,
WHAT'S 2 TIMES 7?
- 14, 14! - THAT IS CORRECT.
- WAH!
- YOU'RE THERE. YOU'RE SAFE.
THESE AREN'T THAT HARD.
AMANDA, BACK IN SEPTEMBER,
DIANA NYAD SWAM ALL THE WAY FROM CUBA TO FLORIDA.
WHICH BEAUTIFUL AND TALENTED CELEBRITY SAID THE LINE,
"JUST KEEP SWIMMING" IN "FINDING NEMO"?
- OBVIOUSLY DORY AND ELLEN DEGENERES.
- THAT IS RIGHT. THAT IS RIGHT.
- OH, MY GOSH!
UH-OH. [laughs]
- ALL RIGHT.
- [laughing nervously]
- YOU SEEM NERVOUS.
- I AM! - ALL RIGHT.
ANDREA, HERE WE GO.
EDWARD SNOWDEN BECAME FAMOUS FOR LEAKING GOVERNMENT SECRETS.
TELL ME ONE OF YOUR DEEPEST, DARKEST SECRETS.
- ONE OF MINE? - ONE OF YOURS.
- UM...
- YEAH, THAT ONE. - I LOVE THE SCOTT COOKIES.
[laughter]
- ALL RIGHT, I WILL ACCEPT THAT ONE.
ALTHOUGH I DON'T THINK THAT'S YOUR DEEPEST AND DARKEST,
BUT I WILL ACCEPT IT.
CHRISTINA, BACK TO YOU.
BACK IN AUGUST, IT WAS ANNOUNCED THAT I'LL BE HOSTING THE OSCARS.
WHICH FAMOUS OSCAR LIVES IN A GARBAGE CAN?
- OSCAR THE GROUCH. - THAT IS RIGHT, CHRISTINA.
[cheers and applause]
AMANDA, IN SEPTEMBER, APPLE CAME OUT
WITH THE IPHONE 5S.
NAME FIVE THINGS THAT START WITH THE LETTER S IN FIVE SECONDS.
GO.
- OH, MY GOD, SNAKE, SALAD, SUSHI...
SUNRISES, AND SMOOTHIES.
- OH, OKAY, NOW SIX. GOOD, GOOD.
- OHH. - EXCELLENT.
AN EXTRA POINT. WONDERFUL.
ISN'T IT FUNNY HOW ALL OF A SUDDEN
YOU CAN'T THINK OF THINGS WITH S WHEN YOU HAVE PRESSURE ON YOU?
- I DIDN'T KNOW ENGLISH ANYMORE. - YEAH.
ANDREA... - YES.
- ADAM LEVINE WAS NAMED THE SEXIEST MAN ALIVE,
BUT HE'S NOT THE ONLY SEXY JUDGE ON "THE VOICE."
NAME TWO OTHER "VOICE" JUDGES.
- UM, UM, UM, CEELO GREEN AND--OH, MY GOD,
I THINK HE'S SO SEXY TOO.
OH, MY GOD, WHAT'S HIS NAME?
UM, UM... THE COWBOY.
THE OH, GOD, OH.
OH, MY GOD.
- THE SEXY COWBOY, THAT'S RIGHT. - THE SEXY COWBOY.
- YEAH. - HOW ABOUT CHRISTINA AGUILERA?
SHE'S SEXY. I'LL GO WITH HER.
[laughs]
- THAT'S GOOD.
BLAKE SHELDON WOULD'VE BEEN GOOD.
BUT CHRISTINA WAS GOOD. THAT'S GOOD.
YEAH, THAT'S ALL RIGHT.
AMANDA, ON JUNE 15TH, KIM AND KANYE CELEBRATED
THE BIRTH OF THEIR DAUGHTER, NORTH WEST.
IF YOU'RE STANDING IN BURBANK AND YOU'RE FACING ALASKA,
WHAT DIRECTION ARE YOU FACING?
[laughter]
- WEST?
- WEST? - YEAH.
- NO, BUT IT'S CLOSE. IT'S NORTHWEST.
- NORTHWEST.
- WHICH, THE CLUE WAS 'CAUSE THE BABY'S NORTH WEST.
BUT THAT'S ALL RIGHT.
I HAVE ENJOYED MY TIME WITH YOU SO MUCH.
- I DON'T WANT TO GO. - IT'S TIME SAY AU REVOIR.
- [screams]
- OH, MY GOD.
ANDREA...
- [laughing nervously]
YES?
- ANDREA, HERE WE GO.
I THINK YOU'RE GONNA KNOW THIS ONE.
- MMKAY.
- FOR THE FIRST TIME IN OVER 100 YEARS,
THANKSGIVING FELL ON HANUKAH.
WHICH HOLIDAY ORIGINATED FIRST, THANKSGIVING OR HANUKAH?
- THANKSGIVING.
[laughter]
HANUKAH.
- OH, WAIT, DID YOU SAY HANUKAH?
- YEAH! - OH, YEAH, YOU'RE RIGHT.
YEAH, YEAH.
THAT MEANS I'M GONNA GIVE YOU A FREE PASS TOO IF YOU MESS UP.
- OKAY. WHEW.
GEICO HAD A POPULAR COMMERCIAL WITH A TALKING CAMEL.
WHAT WAS THE CAMEL'S FAVORITE DAY OF THE WEEK?
- OH, HUMP--WEDNESDAY-- HUMP DAY?
- YES, EXACTLY.
ALL RIGHT.
NOW, NOW YOU'RE BOTH EVEN, SO NOW WHOEVER--
NOW I HAVE TO REALLY DROP YOU IF YOU DON'T KNOW.
- OKAY. - MMKAY.
- ALL RIGHT, ANDREA.
"THE WOLF OF WALL STREET" CAME OUT ON CHRISTMAS DAY.
IF LEONARDO DICAPRIO WAS THE WOLF OF WALL STREET,
WHO WAS THE WOLF ON CNN?
EH-EH-EH.
- CNN...
BOB.
[laughter]
- BOB THE WOLF, YES.
- BOB THE WOLF. - YEAH.
NO, THERE'S A GUY ON THERE NAMED WOLF BLITZER.
AND THAT WOULD'VE BEEN THE ANSWER, BUT LISTEN.
I AM GONNA SAY GOOD-BYE TO YOU RIGHT NOW.
GET READY. IT'S GONNA BE SO MUCH FUN.
- YEAH, I LOVE YOU TOO. - ARE YOU READY?
- [whimpers] - ALL RIGHT?
- YES. - OKAY, HERE WE GO.
- OKAY. - OKAY.
- [whimpering]
- IT'S REALLY THE ANTICIPATION MORE THAN THE FALLING, ISN'T IT?
- WHOO!
- 'CAUSE YOU'RE GONNA CALL RIGHT NOW.
SO JUST GET READY. READY?
OKAY. - WHOO-HOO.
OH, STOP IT! STOP IT!
- OKAY. - STOP IT.
- OKAY. READY? - OKAY, YEAH.
- OKAY. - OKAY.
BYE.
[screams]
- OH.
- MY APP HEADS UP WAS ONE OF THE TOP SELLING APPS OF 2013.
WHOSE HEAD IS ON THE $50 BILL?
- OH, MY GOSH. [laughs]
- I KNOW.
- I--MEH.
- MM.
- GEORGE WASHINGTON.
- IT IS ACTUALLY ULYSSES S. GRANT.
AND I HAVE TO SAY GOOD-BYE TO YOU RIGHT NOW.
- OKAY. - I'LL SEE YOU SOON, OKAY?
HERE WE GO. - OKAY, BYE.
- AH.
ALL RIGHT, EVERYBODY, COME ON OUT!
[cheers and applause]
HI, AMANDA. - HOW ARE YOU?
- HI. - HI!
- HI! - OH, MY GOODNESS.
- ALL RIGHT, FOR PLAYING, YOU'RE EACH GETTING
A 50-INCH INSIGNIA TELEVISION SET.